Nobels BTFO

TurtleCat
TurtleCat

Where were you when my boy Garrison Keillor BTFO the nobel committee and nipponese hack Kazuo Ishituro?

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.adn.com/opinions/national-opinions/2017/10/11/to-satisfy-the-swedes-a-nobel-lit-winner-must-work-the-abyss/%3FoutputType=amp-type

Once again the humorless Swedes have chosen a writer of migraines for the Nobel Prize in literature, an author of twilight meditations on time and memory and mortality and cold toast by loners looking at bad wallpaper. It's not a prize for literature, it's a prize for nihilism. The Swedes said he's like Jane Austen combined with Kafka with some of Proust, three other writers you'd never invite to a party.

All the Swedes with a sense of humor came to America and so what the Nobel judges recognize is bleak, cramped, emotionally stunted, enigmatic, pretentious. Millions of people around the world understand the concept of reading books for pleasure but the Swedes think of it as a form of colonoscopy. If they gave a Nobel Prize for food, they'd give it to quinoa.

I say, let the Swedes give the prize for urban planning. Let the Jews give the Nobel Prize. They know from literature. Compare a list of great Jewish writers and a list of great Swedish writers. I rest my case.

Nobel prize for literature? More like, Nobel prize for SHITerature ahahahahaha

All urls found in this thread:
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.adn.com/opinions/national-opinions/2017/10/11/to-satisfy-the-swedes-a-nobel-lit-winner-must-work-the-abyss/%3FoutputType=amp-type
King_Martha
King_Martha

@TurtleCat
Hahaha yes man goof and gags are the pinnacle of literature, who cares about reality and shiet, based jews can make blood libel seem funny and cool.

viagrandad
viagrandad

@TurtleCat
Ha thanks i had a laugh

5mileys
5mileys

@TurtleCat
It's her turn. Fucking humourless swedes.

takes2long
takes2long

@TurtleCat
Is this real? If so: HAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT A FUCKING PLEB

Bidwell
Bidwell

I can't actually tell whether it's an ironical piece, a brilliant bait or a try out of some new American superweapon designed to kill through sheer power of retardation.

Sharpcharm
Sharpcharm

he wouldn't have a cheeky banter with Jane at the party followed by a discrete cunnilingus in the bathroom
american "humorists," everyone

CodeBuns
CodeBuns

@TurtleCat
Who the fuck wouldn't like to party with Kafka? And quinoa is good af.

Spazyfool
Spazyfool

@TurtleCat
Keilor. Or should I say (((Keilor)))? I wonder who could be behind (((this)))?

Sir_Gallonhead
Sir_Gallonhead

If they gave a Nobel Prize for food, they'd give it to the most nutritionally valuable cereal in the world that is tested by NASA as primary foodstuff for long-range range space flights.
that would be bad

MPmaster
MPmaster

@Sir_Gallonhead
(((Keilor))). I recommend reading The Culture of Critique.

SniperWish
SniperWish

@Sharpcharm
Is Mario really as good as everyone says? How much of his books, if at all, are propaganda?

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

@TurtleCat
kafka and austen are humourless but roth is SO FUNNY that boring people would never give him an award because he's simply THAT FUNNY

DeathDog
DeathDog

Kafka is much funnier than Garrison Keillor

FastChef
FastChef

Oy vey he's not wrong. What a great ally you are Mr Keillor!

whereismyname
whereismyname

nobel prize should go to writers I want to have a beer with

takes2long
takes2long

@TurtleCat
you would never invite proust to a party
What the fuck, proust was funny as fuck

iluvmen
iluvmen

@TurtleCat
Jane Austen combined with Kafka with some of Proust, three other writers you'd never invite to a party.
Dumbest shit I've read all day, and I'm on Veeky Forums.

PackManBrainlure
PackManBrainlure

This man should be the official king of Veeky Forums brainlets.

Snarelure
Snarelure

@takes2long
Too hard to clean the semen off your rats afterwards, is what I believe Keillor is alluding to.

takes2long
takes2long

Who?

Poker_Star
Poker_Star

@TurtleCat
Hes right about all swedes that went to america lost their souls and then came back to bring sweden to hell with them

Soft_member
Soft_member

radio personality
my fucking sides

5mileys
5mileys

@TurtleCat
It really bothers me how he whistles when he says any word that has an s in it. That and the general "oh golly gosh" routine made PHC unbearable.

Inmate
Inmate

doesn't know what nihilism is
reading books for pleasure
Jewish supremacy

into the trash it goes

Poker_Star
Poker_Star

@Inmate
doesn't know what nihilism is
Yes, that was painful to read.

Techpill
Techpill

@TurtleCat
Jane austen would be a riot at a party

Methnerd
Methnerd

this is why no one likes Americans
t. American

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

Let the Jews give the Nobel Prize. They know from literature. Compare a list of great Jewish writers and a list of great Swedish writers.

But what did he mean by this?

viagrandad
viagrandad

Of course all the book critics applauded the choice of Kazuo Ishiguro: Praising the dull and deadly is a time-tested way to demonstrate [pseudo] intellectual superiority.

I'd say this describes Veeky Forums rather well, don't you think?

AwesomeTucker
AwesomeTucker

@Snarelure
Are you implying I have rats in my house???!?

Inmate
Inmate

@Burnblaze
He's salty his friend Roth didn't win.

Poker_Star
Poker_Star

@TurtleCat
SWEDEN NO

Methnerd
Methnerd

@FastChef
fun fact if you save this image to you're computer you're added to a list on the SPLC's database.

@TurtleCat
I mean he's right in the narrow sense that Kazuo is shit.

PackManBrainlure
PackManBrainlure

@SniperWish
Read The feast of the goat and judge for yourself. What do you mean propaganda? Of what kind?

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

@TurtleCat
alaska dispatch news
never heard of this publication before.

he wouldn't invite proust to a party
what a moron.

LuckyDusty
LuckyDusty

Goyim should not be allowed to write books, or even read them. They should not be allowed to learn how to read and write.

Sir_Gallonhead
Sir_Gallonhead

@Poker_Star
Pretty rich for a German guy who got famous off of "le humorless stoic Swedes and Norwegians" stereotypes.

Dreamworx
Dreamworx

@TurtleCat
He has no idea what nihilism is and I guarantee you he hasn't read Austen, Kafka, Proust, or anything much at all. This is one of those times where instead of getting angry, or laughing, I just feel sad.

MPmaster
MPmaster

@Dreamworx
"A Prairie Home Companion" received a Peabody Award in 1980.
Keillor received a Medal for Spoken Language from the American Academy of Arts and Letters in 1990.[65]
In 1994, Keillor was inducted into the National Radio Hall of Fame.[66]
He received a National Humanities Medal from the National Endowment for the Humanities in 1999.[65]
"Welcome to Minnesota" markers in interstate rest areas near the state's borders include statements such as "Like its neighbors, the thirty-second state grew as a collection of small farm communities, many settled by immigrants from Scandinavia and Germany. Two of the nation's favorite fictional small towns – Sinclair Lewis's Gopher Prairie and Garrison Keillor's Lake Wobegon – reflect that heritage."[67]
In 2007, The Moth, a NYC-based not-for-profit storytelling organization, awarded Garrison Keillor the first The Moth Award – Honoring the Art of the Raconteur at the annual Moth Ball.[68]
In September 2007, Keillor was awarded the 2007 John Steinbeck Award, given to artists who capture "the spirit of Steinbeck's empathy, commitment to democratic values, and belief in the dignity of the common man."

he's also on the advisory board for the library of america and a published author.

and then there's you...

Spamalot
Spamalot

@5mileys
not at least enjoying "Ruth Harrison, Reference Librarian"
It's that hipster fuck they got to replace him who's unbearable

askme
askme

@TurtleCat
Keillor is a member of the Democratic-Farmer-Labor Party.[48] He is 6 ft 3 in (1.90 m) tall.[49] He considers himself a loner and prefers not to make eye contact with people. Though not diagnosed, he also considers himself to be on the high-functioning end of the autism spectrum.[50] He spoke about his experiences as an autistic person in his keynote address at the 19th Annual Minnesota Autism Conference in 2014.[51][52]

No wonder an autist can understand the emotional depth of Kafka, Proust and to a lesser degree Ishiguro

likme
likme

@askme
that should read *can't understand

CouchChiller
CouchChiller

He obviously doesn't know Kafka or Proust very well
What a dumb hack

GoogleCat
GoogleCat

literally demanding for more jewish control on culture

Raving_Cute
Raving_Cute

@TurtleCat
Let the Jews give the Nobel Prize.
Cheeky kike.

Bidwell
Bidwell

@TurtleCat

God-damn OP, don't scare me like that.

I live in Minneapolis and I was briefly afraid that Garrison had won. He would have been even more absolutely god-damn insufferable than he already is, and I would have had to hear about it for months on end. Not to mention that two laureates in a row (despite Dylan having gotten the fuck out at the earliest convenience and never having looked back) would have given all Minnesotans an even more unwarranted self-importance. We live in a flyover, get the fuck over yourselves. Don't scare me like that OP!

happy_sad
happy_sad

Just finished The Remains of the Day. It was good. Didn't think I'd be so interested in the thoughts of a butler. Not sure what this guy means by saying Kazuo winning is a celebration of nihilism because the book I just read is very much the opposite of that.

Inmate
Inmate

@TurtleCat
I say, let the Swedes give the prize for urban planning. Let the Jews give the Nobel Prize. They know from literature. Compare a list of great Jewish writers and a list of great Swedish writers. I rest my case.
Is he talking about Philip "burgerkike" Roth?

Poker_Star
Poker_Star

The line about "looking at bad wallpaper" was pretty funny desu. Keillor is intolerable though. I hate his show and his "aw geez" shtick. Regardless, Ishiguro shouldn't have won.

Deadlyinx
Deadlyinx

@Poker_Star
Who do you think should have won?

Emberfire
Emberfire

@Deadlyinx
Graham Greene

StonedTime
StonedTime

@Spamalot
I'm alright with him because I don't have to be distracted by a lisp at least.

ZeroReborn
ZeroReborn

@MPmaster
Steinbeck's empathy, commitment to democratic values, and belief in the dignity of the common man
Jesus christ I fucking hate steinbeck that fronting bourgeois hack

Gigastrength
Gigastrength

The Nobel prize should be a hydrogen bomb for Sweden

Emberfire
Emberfire

@Deadlyinx
Cormac McCarthy has to win soon... r-right?

FastChef
FastChef

@TurtleCat
I read that whole thing in his voice

Lunatick
Lunatick

@Sir_Gallonhead
Are you calling me a german? Go fuck yourself.

Spamalot
Spamalot

@TurtleCat
He has a point about comic writing not being rewarded enough, though Proust and Austen are pretty funny and Roth isn't getting the prize more because SA members think he's a misogynist than because of his humor. But he's making a mistake at the other extreme in dismissing less overtly comic writing.

haveahappyday
haveahappyday

@Emberfire
An American won last year and another anglophone this year, I would say he has more chances of dying than getting the Nobel.

w8t4u
w8t4u

@Emberfire
well no because he has yet to write a good book or poem which is kind of what the prize is about so...

massdebater
massdebater

@Bidwell
Are you retarded? In what bizarro universe would anyone even entertain the idea of this nobody ever winning the Nobel?

lostmypassword
lostmypassword

@askme
that's not true that he prefers not to make eye contact.

flying out of MSP to go to ohio for a funeral
super early flight (5 am), getting some coffee after going through security in terminal 1
tall guy walking in my direction, face is very striking
this guy looks so familiar, how do i know him??
looking at him, sipping my coffee, wife is wondering why i'm staring at some dude
he makes eye contact with me
GLARE OF DEATH
quickly moves past us
2 minutes later realize that was GaryK and he was giving me the death stare so i wouldn't ask for his autograph/cause a scene

Emberburn
Emberburn

@Emberfire
????

nigga do you know how they decide who to give the award to? one big criteria is that the artist be living at the date of the announcement.

also, while i enjoy me some greene, nobel prize? really? considering all the others who never received it who deserved it so much more?

LuckyDusty
LuckyDusty

@w8t4u
you're right ishiguru is far superior. so subtle, so intricate. why ever honestly communicate anything when so much can be said through emotionally detached narrators

Stark_Naked
Stark_Naked

le "you must be a lot of fun at parties" reddit-tier criticism
ripping into Kafka and Proust (both Jews) and then fellating the supposed supremacy of Jewish literature
I think it's time for the urn, you old Boomer moron

Techpill
Techpill

@PackManBrainlure
I assumed as a former politician he'd have an agenda to push. I will check out Feast of the Goat.

VisualMaster
VisualMaster

@TurtleCat
zionist who dislikes quinoa
Holy shit. There is nothing more plebeian than this trash.

TreeEater
TreeEater

@massdebater

I don't know idiot, how about the exact same bizarro wacky universe where:

-Donald Trump is president (this is a good thing)
-The Chicago Cubs are the World Series Champions (again, good thing but wacky)
-the talentless Zimmermann got a Nobel (this is not a good thing)

?

It's like you haven't noticed that we've slipped into a new time slip where everything is possible and all is permitted. Strange in a young person. You should be more idealistic for your age.

Skullbone
Skullbone

@Emberburn
wow user good point

New_Cliche
New_Cliche

As a son of Minnesota, I have to say that I never did like garrison Keillor.

Illusionz
Illusionz

An American sucking Jewish dick, never seen that before.

Raving_Cute
Raving_Cute

@Bidwell

it was bad enough when Al Franken became a senator

Harmless_Venom
Harmless_Venom

@LuckyDusty
you sound like youve read less than 200 books in your life and are 18-19 yo and consider yourself smart but lazy with no measurable achievement or discernible talent

askme
askme

@TreeEater
You sound like the kind of person I would never like to meet. Just wanted you to know that.

Poker_Star
Poker_Star

@TurtleCat
Wtf I hate jews now

Gigastrength
Gigastrength

/lit/thread/10141031#p10141031

CouchChiller
CouchChiller

@TurtleCat
dwight ... easy on the gags

VisualMaster
VisualMaster

@Spamalot
Thile is a pretty good bluegrass musician though.

Evilember
Evilember

@Bidwell
this

RumChicken
RumChicken

@VisualMaster
He's mediocre, with admittedly perfect control over his instrument. The majority of his popular works are covers, which is probably because his oc is a mess. Even his covers are unoriginal outside of instrument choice.

The cover of "another new world" played live in dublin is however is a work of unequivocal genius.

askme
askme

@TurtleCat
Philip Roth should've won
not Cormac Mccarthy
getting real tired of this shit

idontknow
idontknow

@askme
Not saying he doesn't have merit, but under what grounds would the committee officially award Chuck McShillelagh?

Techpill
Techpill

I feel like there are better arguments against awarding the prize to fucking Ishiguro than "he's too somber!"

What a retard.

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

@TurtleCat
The Swedes said he's like Jane Austen combined with Kafka with some of Proust, three other writers you'd never invite to a party.
Jej

FastChef
FastChef

I don't agree with all of his points, but isn't he right about the nobel committee? It seems like they only give out prizes to famous people (like Bob Dylan) or writers who aren't all that amazing but fit the description of ""literature"" (like ishiguro). Seems like they never recognize true talent. Why does Bob Dylan and some no name journalist get a prize but not Cormac McCarthy or Thomas pynchon?

Soft_member
Soft_member

@idontknow
a minimalist, so almost Scandinavian, attitude to punctuation.

kizzmybutt
kizzmybutt

@FastChef

You can get your answer in fifty years or so. Won't be worth the wait

TreeEater
TreeEater

@FastChef
ishiguro isn't amazing
let me guess you read 0-1 books of his but formed your opinion from a combination of wikipedia, "think"pieces, secondhand opinion, and sheer arbitrary judgements
don't bother replying

BinaryMan
BinaryMan

@Dreamworx
He has no idea what nihilism is and I guarantee you he hasn't read Austen, Kafka, Proust
Yeah, and Peterson doesn't know what postmodernism is either
Fuck, I hate Veeky Forums sometimes

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