Hello

LuckyDusty
LuckyDusty

hello . i want to get job at goldman sachs bank new york. what's advice can you give person like me ?

All urls found in this thread:
http://www.leveragedsellout.com/2004/01/re-lehman-brothers-recruiting/
CouchChiller
CouchChiller

Buy kneepads

DeathDog
DeathDog

you've already wasted to much time

people work way harder than you and don't make it so why waste your time here?

FastChef
FastChef

Buy lube

JunkTop
JunkTop

@DeathDog
i am from india instituite of technologie my mentor says i have great potential good programmer techniques. what's you say ????

viagrandad
viagrandad

@JunkTop

Pajeet, you can't even write. Forget it.

w8t4u
w8t4u

yes but how do i become big money banker ?

Bidwell
Bidwell

@viagrandad
yes but how do i become big money banker ?.

Nojokur
Nojokur

@LuckyDusty
1. read every blog entry here from an ex goldman employee in chronological order http://www.leveragedsellout.com/2004/01/re-lehman-brothers-recruiting/

2. after you're finished reading all of the blog entries, kill yourself.

Raving_Cute
Raving_Cute

@Bidwell

invest in loo's and convince your people to use them

making people poo in the loo will make you much happier than money ever could

Boy_vs_Girl
Boy_vs_Girl

@Raving_Cute
no my question is how i become a banker from goldman sachs bank in new york ?

happy_sad
happy_sad

@Boy_vs_Girl

1) go to new york
2) meet with goldman sachs
3) during interview you must to use the loo (this part is very important)
4) at end of interview you give firm handshake (this is so they know you washed your hands)
5) wait for job offer, they should call you right away

RavySnake
RavySnake

@Raving_Cute

That's maybe the best advice he should follow to be rich. I wish I had a chance to make money like that in my country.

whereismyname
whereismyname

@LuckyDusty
THIS IS A BAIT THREAD.

The same guy makes it every time. He got me good once.

GoogleCat
GoogleCat

@whereismyname
Actually the last time I made this thread I did Morgan Stanley.

Ignoramus
Ignoramus

@LuckyDusty
I live in Chicago where there are a bunch of investment and financial firms.

There are a ton of finance people trying to apply to firms like goldman sachs so you don't see them recruiting them very much because there is so much supply.

Whenever I see goldman sachs recruiting is when it comes to recruiting physics/computer science majors.

tl;dr become a physics/computer science major and they will come looking for you

Soft_member
Soft_member

@GoogleCat
ahh sorry. You got me good in that thread. I was the retard that fell for it 3 times then realised.

@Ignoramus
To anyone that wants to work for IB, high finance, quant finance any Quant degree will help but CS, physics, math, stats, EE and CE will really get your foot in the door.

Raving_Cute
Raving_Cute

@LuckyDusty
I work for JPM user

Don't fucking work for GC, I hate JPM and consider quitting everyday, I don't care how good the money is, I don't want to do this anymore

Evil_kitten
Evil_kitten

@LuckyDusty
Networking. People network, not computers.

haveahappyday
haveahappyday

@Raving_Cute

Why? I work at a shit bank and I thought working at a bank of JPM's caliber, with internal controls and good information systems, would be pretty comfy.

takes2long
takes2long

@Raving_Cute
GC
General Counsel?

PurpleCharger
PurpleCharger

@Raving_Cute
I have friends working in IB. Whenever they are working with client X they are paired up with JPM to help them.

My friends would not shut up about how cunty the JPM MD's were and how much stricter they have it.

I think JPM in particular has a bad culture out of the IB's

Carnalpleasure
Carnalpleasure

gsachs is a bunch of faggots who think they are batemans.
as an anecdote, i heard about an incident at gsachs-
Upper mgmt scheduled a guest speaker for 4 pm
the speaker did not come until 8pm and upper mgmt knew this
many of the employees left after a few hours, thinking the speaker would not show up/
what did upper mgmt do? THEY FIRED ALL THE PPL WHO DIDNT WAIT THE 4 HRS

its things like this which make me feel gsachs is a culture of inferiority
in my exp ppl who go around parading work ethic and determination and over achieving are THE MOST INFERIOR PEOPLE YOU WILL COME ACROSS.
These ppl (upper mgmt) are literally terrified of the prospect of the public finding out that they have no limiting skills or talents so the do things like this to try to spread the image that hard work and determination are things that only few possess, when in reality anybody can learn to work hard/ give 100 percent..
gsachs former ceo hank paulson went sobbing to the white house to bail out aig so that gsachs wouldnt go under...
sobbing like a little girl
gsachs clowns are fucking apes who think ripping ppl off is a talent

Stupidasole
Stupidasole

@Carnalpleasure
I've heard similar.

A friend told me that during interview rounds (they have like 3-4) that they would have a group one. During the group one they are told to meet in the lobby of a building. The GS HR person doesn't come along for hours and now will only consider hiring the people that waited the hours.

Fried_Sushi
Fried_Sushi

DESIGNATED

Nude_Bikergirl
Nude_Bikergirl

@LuckyDusty
just try to get a job at UBS instead

BunnyJinx
BunnyJinx

I've been in IB in NYC for the last 7 years... All the major bulge brackets are NOT hiring right now, and MS is actually laying off(still have old coworkers there telling me how bad things have gotten).

With the regulation (CCAR and Basel capita requirements) banks aren't making money like they used too

StrangeWizard
StrangeWizard

CIA NIGGER DETECTED
STEAL MONEY
BE JEWISH
EAT GOLD COIN CHOCLATES
you will get the job

Spazyfool
Spazyfool

1. Convert to Judaism
2. ???
3. Profit

askme
askme

@JunkTop
you guys know how hard IIT is to get into? these kids could go to any school in the States and just wreck it. they're smart as shit.

if you're serious, look at other indians on wall street: raj rajaratnam, anil kumar

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