What the fuck is this bullshit I thought I was paid to WORK not fuck around and...

FastChef
FastChef

tfw got called into boss's office because she was concerned that I wasn't socializing with coworkers enough

what the fuck is this bullshit I thought I was paid to WORK not fuck around and gossip all day like my coworkers do. why is this a fucking big deal? I can't talk and work at the same time.

fuck this gay earth

All urls found in this thread:
http://fortune.com/2015/10/29/happy-productivity-work/
Need_TLC
Need_TLC

iktfb

Welcome to planet normalfag. Enjoy the ride because it never fucking ends.

Spamalot
Spamalot

anon, it's friday, wanna go grab lunch with the dept?

not really

girlDog
girlDog

@FastChef
bro its fucking fucked

i want to work not feel harassed to go out to drink after , fuck that i dont need to go out to work, id rather finish the work then take a two hour brake , ffs fuck earth
i cant reference sexual anything, but my boss can tell guyus to grow a pair, even though she was the cunt queen, inm the end i took her job and she was fired but still man fuck this gay ass earth

JunkTop
JunkTop

@girlDog
i want to work
i can't relate to that
i mean fuck colleagues but work is not something a sane person should want

PurpleCharger
PurpleCharger

@girlDog
now you can tell the bitches to grow a pair

Nude_Bikergirl
Nude_Bikergirl

Its not enough to be enslaved you have to pretend you like it. Dance for your masters if you ever want to make it to house nigger.

takes2long
takes2long

she

All you needed to say bro. Good luck with all that.

Bidwell
Bidwell

@FastChef
If being social is part of your job, and you just want to work, then be social. IDIOTS

idontknow
idontknow

@JunkTop
What if you like your job? I actually like programming. But I can't stand working as a developer. Too much of the retardation that OP is experiencing.

I had a contract-to-hire (LOL) job two years back where they were controlling even about the type of socializing. I made an effort to eat lunch with the team, even though they were like catty high school girls, and a couple after-hours things. But then I missed some 4-hour UNPAID mid-day picnic and couldn't afford to go drinking every night so they got super butthurt. Meanwhile, I wasn't _allowed_ to even speak to business analysts for any reason; not to get clarification on specs, not to bullshit, nothing.

Emberfire
Emberfire

@FastChef
@idontknow

KEK. I worked for a company like these in Ukraine a few years ago. Pissed me off so badly that I bought a plane ticket back home and flew out of the country with no notice.

w8t4u
w8t4u

@FastChef

if she's talking about outside of work. tell her to mind her own got damn business. If she means at work thats your company's nice way of telling you your autistic anti social behavior is weirding out your coworkers, cut it out or we'll find a way to fire you.

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

It's part of the team atmosphere companies try to create within their offices to increase productivity.

CouchChiller
CouchChiller

@FastChef
achtually, if you took business courses, employees who don't socialize are known to be more unproductive than the ones who do socialize.

However, a reason for unsocial activity is because there is no motivation. So the lady was probably figuring out why you are not motivated or something.

Yes, I know its fucking stupid, I don't believe one bit. But I literally just wrote a paper on this sucking up to the jewish way of thinking and got an A

whereismyname
whereismyname

@FastChef
Don't socialize with coworkers enough?

Perfect time to buy buttcoins.

Stark_Naked
Stark_Naked

@FastChef
make out you're ona 12 step for something, anything - booze, sex, kite flying, socio-economic free form jazz flute. nothing specific just a gentle 'fuck off, bad things happen when I ...'

viagrandad
viagrandad

@CouchChiller
achtually, if you took business courses, employees who don't socialize are known to be more unproductive than the ones who do socialize
This is why we mocked the business school students in college.

idontknow
idontknow

Because socialites get suspicious when people don't talk to them or when others don't include themselves in "the group" per say

Sharpcharm
Sharpcharm

@CouchChiller
achtually, if you took business courses, employees who don't socialize are known to be more unproductive than the ones who do socialize.
I can tell you that there no scientific evidence for this claim. This is why we make fun of business students in college. Even fucking social science kids know this is bullshit.

SniperWish
SniperWish

@viagrandad
@Sharpcharm

really? I am sure they are mocking you and your 40k before taxes salary job as a cashier now.

Here is an article of happiness and productivity.
Question, do you think employees who don't socialize are happy? Do you think employees who socialize are more or less happy? to me, those who socialize are more happy.

I really doubt an employee who rarely talks to someone is happy working at their job. They might, but unlikely. If ops wants to chime in and sees if he hate or job or not I can confirm my research.

http://fortune.com/2015/10/29/happy-productivity-work/

RumChicken
RumChicken

@FastChef
This is the bane of my professional existence

Every single time I'm up for review anywhere they give me this shit. Doesn't matter how well I do my job, it's always this. Even when I go out of my way to be a social coworker, it's still not enough. Fkn normies.

VisualMaster
VisualMaster

@SniperWish
5
fortune
AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I work for in a STEM field and trust me socializing is something business folk came up with so they can force you to work after work hours. Also its to inflate their ego because they're told from a young age if you have no attention then you're a moron. Like I said business people in the real world are mocked at by a lot of people. Including tradesmen.

GoogleCat
GoogleCat

@FastChef
if you want to get a better position working is not the path you should take.
managers are going to promote their friends not the productive weirdo in the corner. thats how the world works kid. I learned that lesson the hard way.

Dreamworx
Dreamworx

@GoogleCat
being promoted to manager
not working until you learn the trade and start your own company
Stay poor you wage pleb.

Carnalpleasure
Carnalpleasure

@FastChef
Reminds me of a situation I had

start traineeship with 7 others
3 weeks at working and doing great
management want a talk
other trainees are complaing about how eager I am and my work ethics
asks me to slow down, told him thats not a option and this is how I am
get new manager he appreciates my work he promotes me and is trying to get me in a team lead position

Mfw I'm the boss of those bitches

Methshot
Methshot

This will be the bane of my professional life, I can see it.

TurtleCat
TurtleCat

@FastChef
Read How to Win Friends and Influence people and stop being a sperg

ZeroReborn
ZeroReborn

@idontknow
this is when you sabotage the company
they don't deserve to be in business

AwesomeTucker
AwesomeTucker

@SniperWish
those who socialize more are extroverted...

JunkTop
JunkTop

be working some shitty grocery store job when I was 18 making $9/h
boss called me into his office and said I needed to show more "enthusiasm"
ignored him and continued to work normally, ended up being one of the best employees because I actually did my job instead of fucking around all day

BunnyJinx
BunnyJinx

@Carnalpleasure
this shit just fucking boggles my mind
like
why the fuck wouldn't people want MORE productive team members? like why the fuck would they honestly want to not be as productive as they could be? like, they hate money or something?

Booteefool
Booteefool

Show up, wear the mask, play the part.

Remember each person's name and one fact about them (hobby, kids, favorite sports team, car they drive). Ask them about that thing. Let them talk. Actually listen, it's just for 5 minutes.

Get some kind of morning news update newsletter or app (WSJ, Economist, etc) and an ESPN newsletter if you work in that kind of environment (not so much a concern in Silicon Valley, I'd bet). Remember the big facts and let other people give their opinions on them. Again, it won't be more than 5 minutes of listening to their shit.

Don't let anyone know your shit. Maybe some surface level details but don't let them say, "Hey, Joe, you're big into muscle cars, right?"

If you keep this up they're going to think you're the most social person that ever lived, just by virtue of letting them talk. Yes this is borderline sociopathic behavior but it works.

5mileys
5mileys

@Booteefool
Joe? We've been trying to call you. We're gonna need to you come in today, and also, tomorrow, as well. Thanks.

Evil_kitten
Evil_kitten

@SniperWish
40k
salary
cashier
Yep, you're a business major alright.

haveahappyday
haveahappyday

@TurtleCat
Read How to Win Friends and Influence people and stop being a sperg
I'll save OP the trouble: never ever do better at anything than your dumbest coworker or they'll have a sad

likme
likme

@haveahappyday
Alternatively, "Mediocrity: We'll Reach That High Someday."

kizzmybutt
kizzmybutt

@CouchChiller

I been told differently in my business courses.

SniperWish
SniperWish

hah

BlogWobbles
BlogWobbles

@Booteefool
It will also come across as sociopathic at parties. I mean possibly not work functions.

DeathDog
DeathDog

@idontknow
What if you like your job? I actually like programming.
me too, but i hate work nevertheless
work kills the soul
coding for myself is a thousand times more satisfying

PurpleCharger
PurpleCharger

@DeathDog
What do you code for yourself? I keep saying I'm going to learn to code, then giving up half way into some intro course because I can't figure out how I go from some cunt that just followed some guide to paid work or contributing to some project. It's not like I have any original ideas for stuff to try and make.

BunnyJinx
BunnyJinx

@Emberfire

lel

i hope this is real

GoogleCat
GoogleCat

@SniperWish
Really depends on the job.

I work with embedded systems developers. To be good at the job practically requires them being somewhere on the autism spectrum. Practically none of them give a fuck about typical suit and tie style management. They just want to tinker with things and be left alone. Some of them would probably work without pay until their finances forced them elsewhere.

Illusionz
Illusionz

@Burnblaze
I hated pep rallies in highschool. I thought they were circle jerks then. Wearing a suit as a middle aged man doesn't change the fact that it's a circle jerk.

Bidwell
Bidwell

@PurpleCharger
I find the software market to be like any other; full of useless junk and hard to find what I need.

I have a small business and needed software for inventory and accounting. Basic stuff, put inventory in one table, sakes in another, and find out how you're doing. Doesn't exist. There are million dollar ERPs for inventory, Excel and it's retarded cousins for adding up numbers. My software also fits into a hypothetical eCommerce solution too, so it's 3 programs in 1.

That's what you need to do. Find a need that everyone else is too lazy, stupid, or greedy to fulfill.

AwesomeTucker
AwesomeTucker

@BunnyJinx
They don't like people that are too far ahead of the pack for a number of reasons.

You are ambitious and wont work for peanuts
You increase turnover by making people look bad
You are a threat to their position
They are afraid of you becoming irreplaceable due to numbers
An irreplaceable asshat that can't be controlled can make those around him miserable, or band with them to collectively resist management decisions.

Generally speaking, being told you are too good is a sign that you should move on sooner rather than later. One way or another you are going to get screwed, either because someone can't handle their own ego, or because management simply isn't skilled enough to properly utilize you. Even if you are getting paid well, you are hurting your long term career options.

@Bidwell
Try finding a good developer that writes clean concise efficient secure code that also understands UI design. Every fucking dipshit 3 man company wants to cut corners and structure the code "their" way. Fuck you. I spent weeks vomiting into visio so that I have a comprehensive roadmap of future updates. I gave you a run down of how I wanted the interface designed, and how I the UI was to be done with the API I outlined so we can reskin it.

I designed the system to be scalable, and have planned redundancies built into the system. You tried turning in code that you clearly hired someone in India to write. You spent 3 months doing this. This is why I put shit into escrow. You aren't getting paid. No, you don't get to 'fix' it. Go ahead. Sue me. I'd love to see you tell a judge why you thought you could get away with serving me instant noodles you doused in gasoline then set on fire when I ordered, and agreed to pay for, a nicely done large steak with a garlic sauce.

Seriously. If you ever find a good developer as a small business, get them on retainer. Shit's right up there with having a properly coked up contract attorney in terms of saving you headaches.

Stupidasole
Stupidasole

@Bidwell
i develop unique software a lot.
shit is very expensive.
avoid it if you can.

usually bigger firms have enough money for this but end up regretting on the long run.

viagrandad
viagrandad

@Stupidasole
to give you some numbers:
$200k to $600k would be a GAMP adherent MES/WMS system that goes under an ERP like SAP and we are actually considered cheap on the market.

a very simple system with no interfaces no specialized hardware could go as low as $40k but it rarely does and these systems don't do anything fancy just provide a ui for the user to enter data that's all.

if you want a system that's flexible, runs workflows and dynamically reportable interfaces a lot it goes into the $1mil territory.

if you want all of this well documented multiply the numbers by 2.

and like i said we are dirt cheap.

w8t4u
w8t4u

@PurpleCharger
What do you code for yourself?
i'm interested in security and cryptography. i was trying at one point revive WASTE, then started my own opensource darknet type client from scratch. didn't really had the time to go anywhere with it and lost the source before i published by a dumb accident.

but that's the general area i'm interested in. giving people secure ways to communicate and store their data like client side encryption for clouds and collaboration/teamwork solutions for encrypted cloud data.

lot's of products on the field but disturbingly the majority is closed source. closed source security and cryptography is just retarded snake oil bullshit. hamachi is a great example i would love it but it's closed source.

likme
likme

@Methshot

you sound like a big guy

kizzmybutt
kizzmybutt

@w8t4u
Do you prefer working with open standards for equipment, or do you like the clusterfuck of proprietary hardware with all of it's bleeding edge, but limited functionality?

As someone who oversees projects, any time a contractor mentions the need for proprietary hardware interfaces I instantly put their proposal on the backburner. As you said. Shit's expensive. And lock in is even more expensive.

Deadlyinx
Deadlyinx

@FastChef

Tell her you're an introvert and being forced to socialize is mind rape to you and you might have to twitter about this attempted rape.

Methshot
Methshot

@kizzmybutt
well at work i almost always have to deal with proprietary bullshit. it's a clusterfuck and we are doing it anyways. we get shit done that's kind of our thing.
open standards are nice and all but time and time again they have been huge disappointments also. just because something is open sadly doesn't mean it's good also.

SniperWish
SniperWish

@FastChef

This reminds me of the girl in Re:Life.

StonedTime
StonedTime

@Methshot
Quite true. Most of the dumb shit I've dealt with had to do with shoving retarded amounts of data around. Open stuff saves on future costs, but sometimes standardized tech just doesn't have enough horsepower for the needs right now. The car analogy is gutting your emissions systems and putting in a straight pipe with a turbo. It's never going to pass inspections, reeks of gas, and is more than a little failure (fire) prone, but at least it's fast when it works.

I've seen some really strange 'hybrid' solutions. One one project that I wasn't involved with had some people actually using display ports to shove some algo bullshit out as CUDA chewed on the raw data. Needed special cables, but apparently it was a workable proof of concept.

takes2long
takes2long

@FastChef

Buy Monero
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Inmate
Inmate

@takes2long

G e t a j o b
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j
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likme
likme

NORMIES REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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