FRUGAL THREAD

iluvmen
iluvmen

How do you get the most bang for your buck, Veeky Forums? Here are my tips

Piss in bottles and dump them out your window to save on water and sewage bills.

Leave used shower water in the tub during winter to help heat your bathroom
Use Bounty kitchen roll instead of loo roll. Clean it off in your saved shower water and hang it out to try to use as a towel/loo roll later... rinse and repeat
pay $0 on sewerage bills

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

@iluvmen
Apply to lots of different jobs in different areas and be willing to move in order to be able to relocate closer to the highest paying positions
Shop at the dollar store.
While working for the company that you moved closer to, apply for different positions that pay higher and use offers you get for them to ask for a raise or you're leaving.
Work hard and ask for as many hours as you can handle.
Invest wisely and read hundreds of financial articles and learn to play a virtual stock market game that you revisit every couple of weeks
Try hundreds of different investing strategies and theories and see how they play out in real life.
Eventually quit your job to start a hedge fund after years of studying and obtaining success in financial markets.
Start hiring your own employees that you give a fair cut, but not the lions portion which you keep to yourself.
Adapt, expand, overcome and endure for years and years, pushing yourself to the limit and learning as much as you can.
Oh and throw your shit onto your neighbors lawn and blame his dog so you lower your water bills.

RumChicken
RumChicken

@iluvmen

Run hose from neighbors house at night into water tank
no water bill

girlDog
girlDog

@iluvmen
Always hang out with friends to use their toilet and get nutrition from their groceries.
Safe energy by unplugging you empty refrigerator
Cut down energy bill further by using battery powered light and power banks for all your devices which you recharge at your friends houses.
Improve liquidity by pretending not to have enough money with you when shopping with friends. Do this every few weeks.

massdebater
massdebater

How do you get the most bang for your buck
Talk your GF into a three way with some of your friends.
Don't tell her they gave you money for it

StrangeWizard
StrangeWizard

@iluvmen
Piss in bottles and use them for warmth.

Not frugal enuff op

Fuzzy_Logic
Fuzzy_Logic

@massdebater
How profitable is being a cuck, user? Is it worth it?

Garbage Can Lid
Garbage Can Lid

@StrangeWizard
good stuff. on that piss colored note, always drink your own piss before you drink normal water, it is a waste not to.

Bidwell
Bidwell

Suicide

go straight to Valhalla and never pay another bill in your life.

girlDog
girlDog

growing your own food (mostly food which grows fast and doesn't require soil)
scavenge through people’s garbage for useful things
taking thousands of straws from McDonalds and selling them online, same for paper napkins etc.
go to free sample areas and take heaps from each person
Piss in bottles and dump them out your window to save on water and sewage bills.
Turn in plastic bottles at super markets
Pee in the sink
Find the route to where you need to go with the most hills descent on the way there and flat or descending on the way back to save fuel
Never open windows and jerk off to stay warm
Beans and rice is a cheap way to sustain yourself
give blood or sperm for money
go into stores and use their deodorant for free
add compressed air to your propane tank to save on heating costs
dip candles in melted candles lasts longer
Use a campfire to cook your meals
Knock on doors asking for donations for a church
drive at night with headlights off to save money on electricity
Eat low fibre diet and shit once every 4-5 days to save money on toilet paper and water bill
Brush teeth once a week only
Turn in bottles in at super markets
Only Shower once every 5 months
go to laundry rooms, swoop in and steal dryer cycles (You can start a business this way)
Use same water you use for bathing, defecating, cooking, and washing clothes
Kill local wildlife for food
Get water from ponds and rivers
urinate into a bag of straw for six months then ferment it to extract potassium nitrate, turn that potassium nitrate into gunpowder which you can sell or use
scavenge old Christmas trees and grind up the needles for a cheap alternative to deodorant (Great way to start a business).
Take off a week before Christmas and drive around picking up delivered packages while the homeowners are at work.
Re-use toilet paper and paper towels
If you get hungry have sex with a girl. Wait for the baby to be born. BOOM Free meal.

idontknow
idontknow

@girlDog
Fucking KEK.

FastChef
FastChef

@girlDog
Frugal af
Absolute madman
can't even pick a favourite tip. Upvoted!

Fried_Sushi
Fried_Sushi

@FastChef
reddit
get out
REEEEEEEEE!

Deadlyinx
Deadlyinx

@Garbage Can Lid
just run it through a sawyer mini
it's actually doable

Snarelure
Snarelure

@girlDog
add compressed air to your propane tank to save on heating costs
drive at night with headlights off to save money on electricity
Kill local wildlife for food
urinate into a bag of straw for six months then ferment it to extract potassium nitrate, turn that potassium nitrate into gunpowder which you can sell or use
scavenge old Christmas trees and grind up the needles for a cheap alternative to deodorant (Great way to start a business).
If you get hungry have sex with a girl. Wait for the baby to be born. BOOM Free meal.
fucking shitskins man... go back to africa you nigger

viagrandad
viagrandad

We pay for trash by the weight here so every night I take my daily trash with me on my walk and put it in a public trashcan.

StonedTime
StonedTime

Paint your feet and shins black, never buy or wash socks.

BunnyJinx
BunnyJinx

@viagrandad
Couldn't you just burn it in the back yard?

CouchChiller
CouchChiller

@BunnyJinx
He collects the morning dew each morning to save on the water bill and doesn't want to ruin the grass.

AwesomeTucker
AwesomeTucker

@CouchChiller
collecting dew
fucking gig

JunkTop
JunkTop

@iluvmen
drink your pee so you dont have to buy water

PurpleCharger
PurpleCharger

@BunnyJinx
can't, that's where he buried all the free hookers he used.

Methnerd
Methnerd

@girlDog
add compressed air to your propane tank to save on heating costs
not safe senpai

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

@iluvmen
Lol I thought this was a board for rich people not for poor fucks

King_Martha
King_Martha

@BunnyJinx
That's more work.

Deadlyinx
Deadlyinx

Sides in orbit. But seriously you all forgot about free tp, paper towels, soap and a hair dryer in most public restrooms

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

@Fuzzy_Logic
I don't think you got the joke senpai.

bang

RumChicken
RumChicken

@Burnblaze
How do you think you get rich?

AwesomeTucker
AwesomeTucker

ITT: Homeless people with a computer using free wifi somewhere public.

Crazy_Nice
Crazy_Nice

@RumChicken
I'll tell you how to get rich:
Hard work
And dedication
Realize that you're a 0 compared to others
Always stay alert and ready to work a 12h shift
Make a future for next generations
Be the richfag you've always wanted to be
Exercise and stay healthy.

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

How do my frugal bros do it when they want to indulge on some fast food but don't want to pay?

Find a McDonalds with a childrens party section and tell them you are having the kids come. Order a few burgers and say you will take them to the kids area then pay then run off when they aren't looking.
Buy some cheap red onions for a few cents a pound. Then chop them up, soak them in rancid stale oil, sneak into an all night Subway when the store assistant isn't there and throw them into the red onion container. Buy a sandwich and get extra red onion, pay, sit down to eat, bite into it and complain it tastes of rancid oil. The assistant will check and give you your money back and a free sandwich
Five Guys is delicious but very expensive. If you carry some foil scrunched in your asshole for the walk to the store, then sneak into the restroom when you get your burger and wrap your burger in the assfoil you can complain about the smell and get a free meal, they won't suspect you
All fast food places have free sauces, milk, stirrers etc
Most small business burger trucks have little quality control or portion control. If you buy some fries from one and when they are scooping the fries, you make a distracting comment about the superiority of McDonalds they will get angry and their wrist will flick downwards giving you extra fries
Turn off your engine when choosing at a drive thru
Park as far from the window as possible when being handed your food. Ask a friend to wait by the counters in the restaurant and when you call him to give him the signal you are at the window have him drop something heavy. The bang will shock the lady at the drive thru and she will already be stretching and will drop your food, entitling you to a refund
Complain your McFlurry isn't frozen solid enough, it is technically ice cream so you can get a refund or get free freezer usage for it

Illusionz
Illusionz

Implying pancakes aren't the best, most frugal food ever.
Flour, eggs, milk + filling of your choice.

Plus you can make a lot of them with little costs.

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