Dear Don, I bought TrumpCoin but it still ain't pumpin

ZeroReborn
ZeroReborn

Dear Don, I bought TrumpCoin but it still ain't pumpin
I used my cell, my laptop, and my desktop when I bought em
I sent two tweets back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em
There probably was a problem at Trump Tower or something
Sometimes I type addresses too quickly when I jot 'em
but anyways; fuck it, what's been up? Man how's Ivanka?
My girlfriend's pregnant, too, I'm bout to be a father
If I have a daughter, guess what I'ma call her?
I'ma name her Melani
I read about your brother Fred, too, I'm sorry
I had a friend drink himself to death when some bitch didn't want him
I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm your biggest fan
I even got the underground shit that you did with Zimmerman
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
I like time you cucked Ted Cruz too, that shit was phat
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Dan

AwesomeTucker
AwesomeTucker

10/10 post familia, kek'd heartily

whereismyname
whereismyname

TC's gone cold I'm wondering why I trade crypto at all
The news clouds up my Veeky Forums board and I can't sell at all
And even if I could it'll all just dump, but your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

PurpleCharger
PurpleCharger

Kek, you better have the rest prepared as well
Kekd at the Zimmerman part too

Stark_Naked
Stark_Naked

Dear Don, TrumpCoin still ain't pumped or rose, I hope you seen a graph
I ain't mad - I just think it's FUCKED UP you don't help your fans
If you didn't wanna talk to me outside your rally
you didn't have to, but you coulda signed a MAGA hat for Sally
That's my little sister man, she's only six years old
We waited in the blistering cold for you,
four hours and you just said, "No."
That's pretty shitty man - you're like her fucking idol
She wants to be just like you man, she likes you more than I do
I ain't that mad though, I just don't like being lied to
Remember when we met in New York - you said if I'd write you
you would write back - see I'm just like you in a way
I never liked a light weight neither;
They always make excuses when you beat em beat
I can relate when you say ISIS is a menace
so when I have a shitty day, I drift away and watch Apprentice.
'Cause I don't really got shit else so that shit helps when I'm depressed
I even got a tattoo with your name across the chest
Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds
It's like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me
See everything you say is real, and I respect you 'cause you tell it
My girlfriend's jealous 'cause I talk about you 24/7
But she don't know you like I know you Don, no one does
She don't know what it was like for people like us growing up
You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Dan
-- P.S.
We should be together, too

girlDog
girlDog

TC's gone cold I'm wondering why I trade crypto at all
The news clouds up my Veeky Forums board and I can't sell at all
And even if I could it'll all just dump, but your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

Inmate
Inmate

Dear Mister I'm-Too-Good-To-Shill-Or-Hype-My-Coin,
this'll be the last time I ever attend a rally in Des Moines
It's been six months and still no word - We don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two tweets;
I wrote your handle on 'em perfect
So this is my final post on /r/the_donald, I hope you see it
I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Don, I drank a fifth of vodka, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air Tonight"
about that guy who coulda saved that other guy from drowning
but didn't, then Phil saw it all, then at a show he found him?
That's kinda how this is, you coulda rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late - I'm on a 1000 downers now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy retweet or a call
I hope you know I ripped all of your pictures off the wall
I love you Don, we coulda shilled together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you SCREAM about it
I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you can't BREATHE without me
See Don; [*screaming*] Shut up bitch! I'm trying to talk!
Hey Don, that's my girlfriend screaming in the trunk,
But I didn't sell her off, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you
'Cause if she suffocates she'll suffer more, and then she'll die, too
Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now
Oh shit, I forgot, how'm I supposed to send this shit out?

TreeEater
TreeEater

TC's gone cold I'm wondering why I trade crypto at all
The news clouds up my Veeky Forums board and I can't sell at all
And even if I could it'll all just dump, but your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that it's not so bad, it's not so bad

Emberburn
Emberburn

@ZeroReborn
U L T R A K E K

Evilember
Evilember

beautiful

Flameblow
Flameblow

You alt coin shills are seriously unhinged.

Top kek though

WebTool
WebTool

@Emberburn
Fuck the beat, I go acapella
Fuck a papa doc, fuck a clock, fuck a trailer, fuck everybody
Fuck y'all if you doubt me
I'm a piece of fucking white trash, I say it proudly
And fuck this battle, I don't wanna win, I'm outty,
Here, tell these people something they don't know about me.

Fuzzy_Logic
Fuzzy_Logic

Dear Dan, I meant to write you sooner but I've just been busy
You said your girlfriend's pregnant now, how far along is she?
Look, I'm really flattered you would call your daughter that
and here's an autograph for your sister,
I wrote it on the MAGA cap
I'm sorry I didn't see you at the rally, I musta missed you
Don't think I did that shit intentionally just to diss you
But what's this shit you said about going bankrupt, too?
I say that shit just FUDing dogg,
c'mon - how cucked up is you?
You got financial issues Dan, I think you need some counseling
to help your ass from bouncing off the walls when TRUMP goes down some
And what's this shit about us meant to shill together?
That type of shit'll make me not want us to tweet each other
I really think you and your girlfriend need each other
or maybe you just need to treat her better
I hope you get to read this letter, I just hope it reaches you in time
before you hurt yourself, I think that you'll be doing just fine
if you relax a little, I'm glad I inspire you but Dan
why are you so mad? Try to understand, that I do want you as a fan
I just don't want you to do some crazy shit
I seen this one shit on the news a couple weeks ago that made me sick
Some dude was drunk and drove His Yobit account over a bridge
and had his girlfriend when it sunk, and she was pregnant with his kid
and on his phone they found a post, but they didn't say who it was to
Come to think about it, his name was... it was you
Sad!

Evilember
Evilember

*fade to black*

Gigastrength
Gigastrength

Ayy

idontknow
idontknow

who gonna venmo this?

RumChicken
RumChicken

@ZeroReborn
@whereismyname
@Stark_Naked
@girlDog
@Inmate
@TreeEater
@Fuzzy_Logic
appreciate it man, I remember you, dan

w8t4u
w8t4u

top keked 10/10 best post of the year man

Flameblow
Flameblow

@RumChicken
RIP dan

Dreamworx
Dreamworx

meanwhile there is a thread about selling human shit with 3x the responses

hairygrape
hairygrape

@Fuzzy_Logic
how cucked up is you

fucking kek classic Trump

Deadlyinx
Deadlyinx

thanks OP

not a fag today

Snarelure
Snarelure

OP just made my morning that extra bit brighter.

Skullbone
Skullbone

@ZeroReborn
I would help you push this meme to the masses user

Evilember
Evilember

10/10 op

Firespawn
Firespawn

@ZeroReborn

posting that retarded faggot
meming that retarded faggot

what the fuck is wrong with you?

Emberfire
Emberfire

@Fuzzy_Logic
Thank you based OP for this masterpiece. This is going to my favourite website reddit :)

WebTool
WebTool

@Emberfire
Kys

eGremlin
eGremlin

@WebTool
That was mean, reported and downvoted

Lord_Tryzalot
Lord_Tryzalot

@Dreamworx
hello newfag, welcome to fourchannel, now GTFO

ZeroReborn
ZeroReborn

@Dreamworx
Hey, fuck you.
My thread is great.

Stupidasole
Stupidasole

@Inmate
/r/the_donald

@Emberfire
@eGremlin
@WebTool

It's already from le Reddit :^)

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