Say that I managed to raise a few million for a hipster feminist game on Kickstarter

Say that I managed to raise a few million for a hipster feminist game on Kickstarter.
How could I make the money vanish without a trace?

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Send it to me. Ill double it.

Convert to bitcoin and tumble it.
You'll probably need to collect the money through some kind of shell corporation, though.

How does one tumble bitcoin?

I don't know the details, since I'm not a thief or a drug dealer.
Google can probably help, though. There are services that tumble for you in exchange for 1-3%.

Actually, you don't need to be shady. Just use the money to start an LLC, give yourself a salary with the funds. Pretend to work on the game. Hell, you could even make shit in your free time.

Then after you ran out of money paying yourself a salary, explain that the Kickstarter has failed due to internal problems. Kickstarters are not legally bound to create a finished product.

Oh and if they do sue, they will go after the LLC which is legally separate than the salary you paid yourself. So yeah...

They're legally bound to make a good faith effort.

You pretend to work on the game and never actually release the game
Voila

To be honest actually it still feels like degenerate stealing even if it's taking from people I hate to fund development in Botswana.

How much money are we talking about? I mean you could install Unity and make some shitty screen caps every month and claim you are making progress.

A noname developer with a mediocre trailer for a somewhat generic game can rake in tens of thousands.

I've got pretty decent 3D art experience and know how to make very appealing game ideas.
Additionally, I could generate massive controversy (getting huge publicity and ending up only collecting money from people I definitely hate) by adding a feature like the game being intended for only female players, listing reasons why male players are unacceptable.

Read up on The Arkh Project.
Riley has been stealing people's money for like 4 years now.

Spoonfeed plz
Usually 5-10 minutes of researching can be saved by 2 minutes of writing.

She's been through Ike 4 projects already, all under different pseudonyms.
She gets money, hires a couple people, fires them, shows a tiny bit of progress, says OH NOES WE NEED HELP, rinse and repeat.
It's like Star Citizen except more obviously a scam.
encyclopediadramatica.se/The_Arkh_Project

Still doesn't seems as glorious as:
>make trailer for game which is intended to be a haven for women, requiring players to prove somehow that they are female with either a photograph of ID or a picture of them
>trailer shows off a bunch of cool environments, and some character modelling in Blender
>introduce some extra features such as "dual skeleton modelling" which will allow people to customise their characters to extreme detail
>incredibly generous reward tiers, the game will be $50 but you can get it for $20 if you back
>massive outcries at the first game which males aren't allowed to play, causing huge exposure in a matter of days
>massively popular too as it will be the only place on the internet that females will be safe from males
>to add to the controversy and get a big boost to donations, have "developing a system to allow trannies" as a reward tier
>as soon as the money is secured somehow, release an anti-feminist video which denounces all the backers and guilts them about backing such a thing, and says that kickstarter will refund the backers
>kickstarter is like holy-fuck-we-can't-do-anything and everyone's expecting the refund from them
It'd be glorious.
I just need to know how I can do this safely.

>reward tier
I meant milestone.

Ah yeah, I just meant it's really easy to fleece idiots.
Just make sure you're well-hidden.

Have the money go into a 501c3 dedicated to feminism.

Wire it offshore.

Delay the final product until people forget that they paid for it.

It's all very easy to say "money goes into a (obscure jargon) and wire it" but it's a very technically involved process that is pointless to explain in anything but full detail.

correct me if im wront but isnt one of the big "problems" with kickstarter that there is no gaurentee that anything you back will actually come to fruitation and theres nothing they can do about it?

this works too
It's what Anita Sarkeesian is doing. She has pretty much canceled Tropes vs Women even though she received enormously more money than she asked for and all she needed to make was 12 shitty YouTube videos.

That's the solution of a simple thief.
I want to be a pirate and make them know they've been plundered.

He's talking out of his ass. You cannot take dirty money and buy a shitload of Bitcoin with it in any practical manner that doesn't involve a divide-and-conquer scheme, like paying people to sell them for IRL cash via LocalBitcoins, but that opens all kinds of vulnerabilities. You'll have to get the dirty money in some spendable form without identifying yourself and turn it into cash. All of this is intentionally very difficult, because what you are asking to do is very illegal. Turning this money into BTC is not feasible as you cannot buy $10k (or even $1k) of BTC without identifying yourself, unless you buy it with cash incrementally through LBTC, in which case your bitcoins are just as anonymous as your cash was...

TL;DR it's traceable until cash, and you cannot provide any links your identity in the process of cashing it out, and this is (very close to) impossible to do. People sell information on how to do this all the time on darknet markets. It's illegal and hard as fuck so it's valuable info.

So, I guess it isn't as simple as cash out with a casino unlike what people say?

I'm not familiar with the process of Kickstarter's funds release.If I were them, I would require proof of identity before you are even allowed to post. Does anyone know jack shit about how Kickstarter pays you?

>8 hours later
Nope.

Just pretend to make game for a very comfy wage

No.

How about you don't fucking do this? Why spoil a good thing mate? You could ruin it for everyone else who actually have good ideas that could benefit more people (e.g. social enterprises).

>tripfag
Why do tripfags always say the worst things?
I'm not ruining anything for anyone except raining on the parade of misandrics.
And I plan to invest in Africa, which with the same money would benefit a hundred times more people than a shitty social enterprise could, and I could come out at the end of it with at least the same amount of money if I did it right.

godspeed you wonderful bastard

>godspeed
>without knowing how to get away with this
Can't do shit, cap'n

Pretend that the game really costed a few millions.
Shamelessly lie with "le content production" and "paying professionals"

Like starbound?

Hire a dev team composed entirely of ethnic minorities, women and transgenders.

When the game is inevitably a steaming pile of shit, you are safe from criticism as you've given jobs and opportunities to underprivileged groups, and the devs are immune from criticism because of their minority status.

Starbounds ok tho

I think this person needs a straw (poor schmuck or homless person) who will withdraw the funds and convert them for a kickback. Another way is for OP to put on the appearance of a business and create shell vendors that OP owns. OP pays the shell vendors who then pass off a portion of the payment to actual vendors.

You are delusional if you think you are able to pull off that sum with such a lame KS scam at this point.

Getting 10k off KS is hard even if you have a legit game.

>unoriginal games which provide nothing that other games don't can't get funding
Colour me surprised.

And the LLC has no assets other than a couple of computers, a rented office, and a fancy chair?

Have you considered swallowing your pride and just spinning this hipster feminist fanbase thing into more money by way of releasing a viable final product after protracted (and expensive) development, and then making ANOTHER kickstarter for ANOTHER game?

You can steal from someone once, but you can milk them forever.

Eactly!

It released, I already tired of it YEARS ago, and don't remember if I paid for it or if someone else bought it for me.
Or how much.