ITT: Useless "features" in cars

For the cars I had, it didn't change anything until highway speeds and up. Or, at the very least, not in noticeable increments.
But, going on the Autobahn, it's pretty nice to have constantly same radio level, even at 250kph wind and tire noise. Possibly broken in your Audi, I wouldn't know.

Agreed on the expensive to fix, but living in a hilly area I can say that in the rain at night I'd wish other people would have these.
>car oncoming over hill
>crests hill
>1000 SUNS
>not even bright lights, just lights pointing at your eyeballs

Not really that expensive, unless it is the headlight motor that breaks. In which case it can cost in excess of 1000 dollars on some VW models.

However the system itself is fairly simple. Just a potentiometer connected to the backaxle to see where the car is on the ground.

The worst part is needing access to a diagnostic interface in order to properly set the lights in proper position. Like say after you took the headlight out and in.

Fuck this shit

>Turn volume down to talk to passenger
>Volume turns itself up again

>electric parkbrake automatically engages if you open up the door while having the car in D or R
>car refusing to go in ready or drive mode unless you have it in P first
The last one I assume is something with the gearbox to make it last longer or whatever, but the first one is just pure pain.

I recently bought a used car with automatic headlights. It has an annoying message that pops up on a display and makes three beeps telling you that you have the auto headlights feature turned off
I just activated the auto headlight to make it a bit less annoying.

Cause engine noise makes it harder to hear as you accelerate? Sure youve got it at a nice cruising volume but once you slow down without the wind and engine noise youl perceive it as way too loud and constantly be fuckin with the volume knob

I have it and i like it. Its subtle in my car at least

Corvettes have that same feature
It's not a big deal

>Traction control buttons that reactivate when the car loses traction

So what's the fucking point of turning the traction control off?

xbox-huge touchscreens shoehorned into the dash, often combined with half-assed navigation and 800x480 resolution

from when I was learning to drive

>dad's shitbox
>stall
>I can just turn the key and get moving

>driving instructors car
>stall
>gear stick needs to be in neutral
>clutch needs to be fully depressed
>need to twist the key all the way backwards
>wait like two seconds
>then all the way forwards

it was a huge pain in the arse on roads with a load of traffic

You can't. On some newer cars that is

>but once you slow down without the wind and engine noise youl perceive it as way too loud and constantly be fuckin with the volume knob

I don't I just leave it loud.

>He doesn't like touchscreens

Give me knobs and switches any day. Can't stand these things.

>posts the shittiest HUD possible to try and backup his argument

Pushbutton start

This. Even shitboxes have it standard now. Such a waste of money

Cars from 1979 and earlier are starting to be more and more attractive to me every day when I see all these 'features' shoved into your face. I'd like a computer-less car with all manual controls, please.

Keyless starts.
I cannot fucking even begin to think of the thought process behind this design.
>"Let's have a key. Imagine if you could just carry it around and when you get to the car, it unlocks the doors automatically and you can just get in and push a button to turn it on. BRILLIANT"
>"But, sir. Wouldn't that make cars susceptible to remote break-ins and expensive key replacement?"
>"WHO FUCKING CARES ITS THE CURRENT YEAR"

More and more manufacturers are playing with the idea of a completely keyless car. Your cellphone will serve as the key, through an app service or something similar.

>Phone dies before you reach your car, which has your phone charger inside.

Jesus fucking christ thats a horrible idea.
I like the idea of smartphones that we essentially have something that will equal the power of a laptop in about 5 years or so - we can directly carry our shit to work, all our files, access blah blah, communicate and learn with them.
But what in the name of christ is the point of having your credit card and car keys in your phone when there are so much fucking retards everywhere that believe iOS 7 gave them the ability to wirelessly charge their phones by sticking that shit into the goddamn microwave. Even I have lost my wallet at one point. Literally just grabbed something out of my pocket and it fell - accidents happen.
Imagine this scenario when phones are literally made of glass and say an iPhone drops and it's screen gets fucked up or battery stops working.

HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING TO START THE CAR, NEVER MIND FUCKING GETTING IN THE GODDAMN CAR

Innovating for innovations sake is pure fucking cancer.

Is that supposed to look nice?

Hey faggot - you can turn it off nigger

What model do you drive?

for example i am able to switch the GALA (Geschwindigkeitsabhängige Lautstärkeanpassung in german) off in my A4 B8 8k via the mmi.

You are just a faggot who isn't able to do it, so take your audi to the next dealership and let them do it for you faggotmaster

>Innovating for innovations sake is pure fucking cancer.
This sums up so much of what goes on today that it hurts. Fuck.

>Saying all that shit
>Doesn't know Bose systems don't have GALA

GERMAN """"""ENGINEERING""""""""""

>his car has "features"

Is that a literal fucking ipad

And touchscreens are beyond awful for radio functions, you should know this.

why? useful for phone calls and nav.

>"automatic" headlights that don't turn on in fog or rain
>automatic wipers that go fucking batshit insane when there's a drop of water on the windshield

How do the people who use these not have the mental capacity to flip a switch themselves?

>tfw I negotiated a contract for these sensors at my last job :^)

makin ur car more expensive one component at a time

>take me home
>going to home depot

>no, take me to my house
>taking you to the art house

>take me to my place of residence
>I'm sorry, I didn't understand that

Just pull over and punch it into google maps if you don't know where you're going.

>Cars now have an exterior USB jack with cable storage

Good god imagine the damage you could do

>Old truck with bench seat
>Some kind of cloth or towel across the whole seat

Yup, looks about right.

Touchscreens and touch sensitive buttons are completely fucking retarded while driving.

We have a 2014 Fusion that has Touch Sensitive HVAC controls. When going down the highway, especially in shitty conditions like heavy rain, it's a complete pain in the ass to have to take my eyes off the road to press some buttons that drop tactile feedback simply for the sake of being 'modern'.

I'm no luddite, but touch sensitive buttons really are shit in a motor vehicle.

Why is Bose such shit?

I'm surprised more cars don't allow you to control HVAC with the steering wheel and gauge console display yet.

How about the solution we figured out decades ago?

>having to take your hands off the wheel
>having to move your head away from center position

it's inferior. functional, but inferior. I like it, I'm used to it, but it's not an end all be all design.

In the Fusion you can, using the screens in the dash and the steering wheel controls, but they're very limited and not much better because you have to dig through menus, while driving, to actually get to those options.

As said. Just give me knobs or actual buttons. The touch sensitive buttons are there just to be 'modern'. They are in no way, shape or form, a functional, practical upgrade.

1 hand off the wheel at times is normal, it's called a manual transmission.

>having to move your head away from center
You shift focus anyway if you're looking at a temp setting with the system you're describing. Better to just have it be simple, easy to use even in winter with gloves, and able to be standardized on any car. 3-knob wins.

Since there are actual knobs you only need to take one hand off the wheel. You don't even need to take your eyes off the road if you've driven the car long enough because you've got the tactile feedback.

Even my parent's old astro had that, that's not new shit

Cars that do not have their light automatically turned on because 'muh emissions'

Touchscreen anything

Seat belt seat alarms that activate through weight. Nigga if I want to put my groceries there then let me for fuck's sake

Bluetooth radios without usb ports

Engines without dipsticks (thanks Scotty for pointing that out)

Stop/start engines. This shit is downright dangerous, what if you have to launch because something unexpected happens? And the extra wear on the starter and battery and engine is going to cost more than that extra 0,025 mpg

>1 hand off the wheel at times is normal, it's called a manual transmission.

>°C
>psi
Really?

>give touch screen
>give physical nobs
>have physical buttons for changing what knobs do
I do better?

Yes you can turn it of.

Yes , the sensitivity is customizable.

Yes, OP is a pissant shit dumb fuck pleb.

Audis aren't special snowflakes and they share the media parts as with pretty much everything else with VWs.

Yes, I'm sure of what I'm saying. Yes, the feature can be turned of and or dialed up or down.

OP is an idiot. To the square. For saying shit like this and for buying an Audi.

>Oh and it can't be turned off.
I have this in my car, but you can adjust how aggressive it is. I have it set perfectly so I don't even notice it happening, I just don't have to touch the volume.

Pontiac > Audi I guess

Many cars have it already, I have a VW and it has it. VW calls it AFS, is pretty neat. Where you notice it most isn't on the hills but on the bends. Driving a car with it and driving one without it is like day and night.

Totally worth.

7 years and counting and the system never gave me issues. Only thing I could see failing there would be the servos. Anything else is pretty much simple. Nothing that couldn't be fixed at home for a couple bucks.

I think Mazda does it half decent (at least in the CX5? Which I know of), in that you still have to push a small button on the door handle. Which you are touching anyway, but you can still leave the key(chain) in your pocket. So that's not an extra step. Kinda a lot like remote control.

Oh, the downside is, of course, in case of empty battery, there is no manual lock. Or I'm blind.

Most keyless entry cars have a cap on the doorhandle you have to pop off to get to the mechanical lock.

This
And thread.

Also, pls post these words to any thread with useless gimmics in cars and other tech.

>makin ur car more expensive one component at a time

Yeah, only if you are cucked by the industry to buy new cars. Everybody on Veeky Forums should be able to avoid that.

>And the extra wear on the starter and battery and engine is going to cost more than that extra 0,025 mpg

If only the rest of the dumb consumer sheeps would have at least questioned this feature, nobody would buy it ever.
>inb4 but they make the starters very stronk
Shit still will fail faster than it should

Once drove with start stop, hated every moment of it. It was well adjusted and quick, but the feeling of not being in control of what my car does feels like the car industry is bending you over, every stop you make.

Every car since 2001 has that, no? Typical that Audi manages to make it shit, though.

Remove wheel speen sensors. Most cars will throw ECU/abs/check engine errors but drive fine. Leaving you to do hectic skids

my disgust can't be this fucking absolute

>piped-in engine sounds
>reverse lights coming on whenever you use the fob
>push-button start
>touchscreen control everything
>digital dashes
>Tesla
>any automated driving feature

>Oh and it can't be turned off.
Yes it can retard. RTFM

So when I open the door to check how far I am when I'm reversing in I'll have the parking brake turn on?

Second, BMWs do this nicely where you don't even notice it. The only way you notice it is when you drive a car that doesn't have it.

>future crime vehicle

The only ''features'' my car has is a radio cd mp3 player.
its a base model and i like it more.

My friend was driving his mom's prius while his car was in the shop, and the prius has a beeping sound when going in reverse.

Like seriously, what the fuck?
It was funny the first time, but got annoying pretty quick.

That's in my 2010 ford fusion lol. Except you can turn it off.

>USA DOES IT AGAIN

automatic headlights

I'm certain these cause people to not turn their headlights on in the rain, and to forget to turn them on at all when driving cars without the feature

why the fuck are they necessary anyway? how hard is it to flick a switch when you start driving

Piped-in engine sounds are alright in my book, since insulation has gotten so heavy.

CD changer in the trunk.

Why aren't lights on by default? There's no negatives whatsoever.

Burning out bulbs twice as fast.

It's one of the simplest things to turn off. Lrn2google

CHANCE increases, but that's it.

A bulb burns out when it burns out. Doesn't matter how long it runs.

It's more of an obsolete feature than a useless one. Before portable mp3 players it's what you had to do if you wanted a ton of music available in your car.

>My Audi has dynamic noise compensation which adjusts the volume based on the speed the vehicle is going so you don't have to turn it up on motorways.
>In practice what you get is your volume constantly rising and falling every 5 seconds.
>Oh and it can't be turned off.
My 95 Chevy Monte Carlo does that except it actually works. The volume doesn't rise or fall every 5 seconds. It can't be turned off either, but it has proven a useful feature on that car.
>yfw a luxury feature is more reliable on an American car than a German one

As to useless features. I hate how recent laws have forced all 2017 model year cars in America to have backup cameras. HAS to be standard equipment. I could get behind when they made traction control an ABS mandatory on all US market cars after 2012 (along with airbags that could be adjusted depending on the weight of the passenger), but just because politicians don't know how to park gigantic armored SUVs doesn't mean the rest of us can't. Instead of forcing "safety" features down our throats, why not revamp the entire driver education system?

Worst shit, but easy to get around. Turn aircon on but leave it at 0 or the temp on neutral.

what happens if
>driving wife's car
>key is in her handbag
>drop her off somewhere, she takes bag
>drive away
>turn off car and get out
>can't lock car
>can't turn car back on
Do you have to wait for your wife or something?

There's literally nothing wrong with mandating backup cameras, unless you mind a screen in your dashboard but that boils down to personal preference.

My manager has one in his Silverado and it was pretty neat. He said the problem with it is that you tend to stare at it, so if you don't look out the window it can be pretty easy to hit somebody. Just be careful, camera or no camera

>Encourages shitty touchscreens staying around forever
>encourages tiny windows
>nothing wrong with mandated backup cameras
Car design is never ever going to be unfucked.

>I hate how recent laws have forced all 2017 model year cars in America to have backup cameras.

Wasn't that because that dumb bitch who, instead of making sure where the kid is, since it wasn't in the car where it was supposed to be, ran over her own kid while getting out of the driveway?

I very much mind a screen in my dash.

The biggest worry for me though is that manufacturers will take this as an excuse to further neglect putting fucking windows in their cars.

The range is only a few feet. You'd be able to shout or honk at her to come back.

My '02 Malibu has the same feature and I can turn it off. Audi a shit

Features like that piss me off.
Not even Veeky Forums related:
>have auto-brightness turned off for my phone
>open up camera app to take picture
>screen brightens
>open the gallery to check the picture I took
>screen dims beyond any visibility
>fuck it. Go back to home screen
>back to normal brightness
FUCK OFF LET ME CONTROL MY OWN SHIT

Veeky Forums related:
The dashboard on my motorcycle is a POS. It has 3 screens: 1 for current speed and trip meter, 1 for average speed, and 1 for odometer. When I reset the trip meter sometimes I accidentally change to the average speed and don't notice it until I get moving because it says 0 anyway. It usually won't let me change screens while moving so after pounding on the buttons while riding for a minute I have to pull over just to press the button twice and switch it back to the speedometer.

The main problem I see is that politicians/manufacturers think technology can save the retarded. If someone isn't paying attention and doesn't care then no amount of technology will keep them from running over someone.

I wish all cars had them because people are too stupid to turn them on themselves until it gets pitch black. Having really sensitive light sensors (to turn it on in anything besides a sunny day) or always-on lights would be great.

Bulbs are incredibly cheap. Considering the visibility improvement in all lighting conditions that would be a worthy price to pay.

It's likely that road vibrations will fuck your lights before they break from being used too much.

i think the issue is more that the changer is in the trunk instead of indash... i have this in my jeep and its a pain having to stop to change cds... especially if the back i jammed full of camping gear or whatever

my 1997 vectra had that too
kinda useless because you can't hear the anemic engine