How much do you steal from work?

haveahappyday
haveahappyday

How much do you steal from work?

All urls found in this thread:
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=goldbricking
massdebater
massdebater

@haveahappyday
Degenerate (you)

likme
likme

nothing, don't shit where you eat

Methshot
Methshot

Quite a bit

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

@haveahappyday
I give taxi drivers a massive tip when on business trips. More often than not I'll get a wad of blank receipts. If I walk/ get the tube all week I can usually get 15 - 20 fake receipts through on expenses.

I made £230 on my last trip.

LuckyDusty
LuckyDusty

@TalkBomber
Explain

Raving_Cute
Raving_Cute

2 water bottles a day

farquit
farquit

@haveahappyday

I usually bring a pen home in my pocket and forget to bring it back for a couple of days. Also I think I'm in the upper half of eaters when we have lunches, speaking in terms of volume.

Techpill
Techpill

Sometimes i fill my car up with flower pots and baskets when nobody is there they have so fucking many of them they dont even notice

Methnerd
Methnerd

Just I print some e-books

StonedTime
StonedTime

@LuckyDusty
I don't understand what else there is to explain?

Nude_Bikergirl
Nude_Bikergirl

@LuckyDusty
I think he is talking about reimbursement for travel expenses.

Lord_Tryzalot
Lord_Tryzalot

$10 in quarters a day

CouchChiller
CouchChiller

I don't do any work for 80% of the time that I'm there

VisualMaster
VisualMaster

@haveahappyday

My time

Every hour not working productively is an average 40$ pretax in my pockets

eGremlin
eGremlin

I wonder what percentage of people do. I don't anymore but about 10 years ago I worked as a cashier and I wasn't allowed to ring items up or buy items while on the clock, so on a few occasions (maybe.. 3-5 tops), I'd take a water or soft drink and just drink it. Would have paid for it if they let me.

Sir_Gallonhead
Sir_Gallonhead

@TalkBomber

Pretty much this. I knew a guy who worked a side job doing massage therapy and he would pick up gas receipts and similar that other people just throw away. Apparently he made some mad savings claiming them on his returns.

TreeEater
TreeEater

I know somebody who works as a bank branch manager. Every week he goes through thousands of dollars of coins, takes silver ones and replaces them with regular ones...e.g. takes the silver quarter and replaces it with a regular quarter. The numismatic value of the coins adds up, so a quarter might potentially be worth ~$4, "stealing" $3.75 from work.

He has thousands of dollars of silver coins stashed away, all sourced from work.

[spoiler]that person is me[/spoiler]

TalkBomber
TalkBomber

Stealing is wrong.

CouchChiller
CouchChiller

@TreeEater

Used to do that back at my old job. Old farts would sometimes come in and pay for coffee with old bills they found stuffed in an old suit or in a jar in their closet. I've got a few Canadian $1 bills this way. Got a few 1986 $5 bills but they've been circulated so they aren't going to be worth shit for a few more decades. Don't think I'd ever sell them though. It's nice to have a few things around the house with history behind them.

VisualMaster
VisualMaster

@haveahappyday

Possibly 1000$ in tools and wage theft.

CodeBuns
CodeBuns

@haveahappyday
I work 8-9 hours a day. Of those, I idle about 1-4 every day. I steal about 20% of my income Id say

StrangeWizard
StrangeWizard

@CouchChiller
Yeah it's good shit. Somebody came in a few weeks ago, you could tell they were cleaning out a dead relative's stash of old coins. They had a 1879 morgan dollar, swapped it for $1 and it's worth maybe $24 in good condition.
It's the little things that keep us going..

Lord_Tryzalot
Lord_Tryzalot

I deliver food. Sometimes I will take a box and redo the pallet so it's hollow in the center. Sometimes I don't even have to steal. I was delivering ice cream and asked for a sample jokingly. They gave me a whole box that had 6 tubs of ~$12 ice cream.

BinaryMan
BinaryMan

@farquit

A pen? You're nuts. A regular John Dillinger, is what you are.

SomethingNew
SomethingNew

@CouchChiller
This. But I figure if they wanted me to work they'd give me something to do so is it _really_ stealing?

askme
askme

@SomethingNew
Besides, I figure the contractors steal several orders of magnitude more with their bungling.

iluvmen
iluvmen

I took a Sharpie Pen from my workplace (Staples) today

Methshot
Methshot

@likme
See. It's phrases like this that make me come back to this board

StrangeWizard
StrangeWizard

@haveahappyday
I take those glorious $15 fountain pens.

No one knows I've been hoarding them all.

Illusionz
Illusionz

I work at chickfila and I usually sneak a fry or nugget each batch and then I'll sneak a sandwich home.

Evil_kitten
Evil_kitten

@haveahappyday
Nothing, because I'm not poor or a nigger.

StonedTime
StonedTime

I work at a restaurant. I "steal" (take with permission) food from there all the time. Probably hundreds of dollars over the years I've worked here

Evil_kitten
Evil_kitten

@haveahappyday
Like 25k a year

takes2long
takes2long

@CodeBuns

Haha everybody look! A wagie slavie pretending he "steals" work by not "working as hard as he usually does" after lunch

w8t4u
w8t4u

@Evil_kitten
Valet, btw

idontknow
idontknow

@w8t4u
Going through the cars or unclaimed tips?

Emberburn
Emberburn

@idontknow
Charging customers the valet fee and giving their valet stub to the next customer. Repeat

TechHater
TechHater

@CodeBuns
@takes2long
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=goldbricking

Dreamworx
Dreamworx

@haveahappyday

I stole a bunch of iPods from a big box retailer when I worked in their warehouse and loss prevention, lol.

Back when iPods were $300-400, a lot of models came in these slimmer packages that I could tuck into my waste.

I'd first put a few away into an empty bin or unattended corner in the warehouse, when they came off a shipment, and then take one to the bathrooms and tape it to my waist. As a security guy, I would never get checked out on exit. Must have lifted around $10k worth in a few months but stopped when it was getting loud in their loss reports and when they found on of my prepared "caches".

Still don't know how or why I pulled it off, it was extremely reckless and I'm a very straight kind of guy since then.

askme
askme

@TreeEater
i do this at my work. im a cashier and my manager gives no fucks. if i see a coin i like, i grab it and swap it with another. silver quarters, dimes, nickels, wheat pennies

lostmypassword
lostmypassword

@haveahappyday

self employeed, so cant

my second job was at a movie theater, worked there for almost 2 years

The amount of candy, soda, nachos, hotdogs, and pretzels i consumed during those times is incalculable

also if i knew you and you came to my line if i was forced to do concession, you walked away like a king. I would load my friends up with stuff literally until they were dropping things, thats when I knew I gave you enough

Dreamworx
Dreamworx

@Techpill

Why are we not talking about this post?

Carnalpleasure
Carnalpleasure

@Dreamworx
how would one even respond to this post
/b/

FastChef
FastChef

@TalkBomber
do you pick up recipts from the floor or something?

Disable AdBlock to view this page

Disable AdBlock to view this page