part 2/2
>sad shit
When I'm in my feelings, I'll take the car out for a drive at night and photograph. Seems to be when most bad shit happens. My mother tells me nothing good happens late at night - starting to think she's right.
Anyways. An ex-girlfriend was a car girl, and on the surface, everything you'd want in a car girl gf. Dope ride, worked on it herself, no makeup, tall, slender, exotic, take no shit, younger, affectionate, etc. I missed some red flags early on, which revealed themselves in the form of immaturity from her end. It wasn't good, overall, but the sad part is I still get feels every once in a while, even though I know they're toxic.
Another ex-girlfriend that I was actually really into (with my heart, not my dick this time) I split up recently with. She was wonderful, but I lost her because according to her, she doesn't see herself up to my standards and is sparing me the strife of being with her, or something. About how none of her previous relationships were healthy, and she doesn't want to do that to me. Feels bad man. Car related because that night, all I did was drive around, blast sadfeels music, and take more pictures to just be alone.
>autistic shit you think only you feel
Everyone feels connected to their car in one way or another, but I treat the car as its own entity. It has its own thoughts, desires, feelings, etc. I miss it, and it misses me, that kind of thing. I enjoy cleaning it, being around it, and hell, sometimes just sitting in it. Massively autistic.
>how you feel when driving, or shit driving makes u feel
It makes me feel like there's something in the world that understands me...in some autistic sense. Sure, it's a car, and it's inanimate, but a machine that responds to your input, and a machine that only you know through and through is something special.
>etc
inb4 these are just autistic robot tfw no gf feels