ITT: shitpost as if you're in an ancient civilization

>ITT: shitpost as if you're in an ancient civilization
Any persians here? I wanna kick your ass.

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>be greek
>fuck kids
>fuck your own mom
>fuck animals
M A S T E R R A C E

You are lucky we arent a regional power anymore

We would fuck your shit,

I'd take you up on your offer if you could just tear yourself away from your 'purest love.'

Why do you need a specific thread for this? Hellenic and Chinese texts represent an absolute high point for humanity in many fields of study. The culture and political climate was so incredibly advanced and diverse that moderntards can't compete.

The way forward is to classics-post in every thread. To worship our ancient ancestors and learn their wisdom. To move forward in accordance with their teachings.

In fact that is what is happening today. China is increasingly promoting classical texts. Hebrew mythology is being shed from the West and will ultimately, I expect, be replaced by classical theology and the ethics and politics that flow from there. We will all be Hellenised and march on the Mede, we will all be Sinicised and maintain appropriate social and familial relationships.

Things are looking good.

>implying you'd do anything to an ass but tear it apart like tissue paper

>hoplites
>more like hopmoors

>mfw just saw a barbarian walking by today

they really are scum

Christian philosophy is more Greek than Hebrew

Are you implying something bad about our alies? You aren't a piss hair barbarian are you?

Right, because the "philosophy" aspect comes from the Hellenes. I'm not saying that Christianity is entirely evil, I am saying that hebrew mythology will be rejected, and that hopefully we will dedicate ourselves wholly to philosophy and enter a new golden age. The ancient society will be born again, beautiful and new.

>chad Barbarian master race
Ftfy

Does this make you reeeeee? Is Julian your fabourite emperor?

We will never get back to those times.

In the darkest of times there are always glimmers of hope

I made bread :)

Pleb. What did you make it with?

>t. butthurt roman

> fuck your younger political oponents

Actually, those times will occur again, it is just a question of change. That is a theological reality.

In more immediate terms, I'm not trying to create a time machine. Those times aren't literally going to be restored anytime soon, but rather our world will be increasingly inspired by the classics, and we will be increasingly moulded in their image.

Exactly. Further, it is a theological truth that if something is possible, then given sufficient change it will inevitably occur. The Classical world will be reborn, Plato will walk the Earth again, and we will eventually live in an enlightened city state and crush the eternal Mede.

Obviously it's ugly, but it's not exactly shattering my world view or putting me into some deep depression. The idea is to reinvigorate these ideas, to watch as they spread and morally enrich humanity. I don't think we're building a time machine; there will be new statues and there won't be any hebrew zealots left to destroy them.

How are Greeks and Baboons different?
Baboons are actually democratic

>t. Dollar store Egypt

>thinking we can go back to a pre-messianic worldview
get a load of this goy!

>be roman
>collapse

Any R*mans here? I'll tear your women's asshole apart with my gigantic black cock.

>be roman
>live on the streets
>get stabbed by a senator after being trampled over by a chariot

african grain as always this empire would be nothing without africa carrying it on its shoulders

Romanes eunt domus

Maybe you wouldn't have seen one of us if you hadn't cut all your forests down to build
>muh civilization

Caesar did nothing wrong, Ave Caesar!

>be Carthaginian
>War-elephant steps on you

Anyone else here remember the Pompeii thread before it closed?

Anyone want some perfume? I have plenty of highest quality African perfume here, guaranteed 3 shekels less than the competitor by the bottle!

HOL UP! WHERE THE HITTITE WOMEN AT!

>be roman emperor
>get assassinated
YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS SHIT UP

Like plebeian, just get some guards. lol, it's their job, plebeian.

>be roman emperor
>hire guards to stop assassins
>guards assassinate me
CANNOT FABRICATE

>he worships a Jew
Absolute state of this Empire, lads.

Having sex with girl (male) temple prostitutes isn't gay. It's for a good cause.

>I see a doctor, a lawyer, an engineer, and a physician

PICTLAND FOREVER

Don't forget they got fucked by Turks.

Your women belong to us latin boy

>Be Holy Roman Empire
>Fail to run an actual Empire
>get btfo by Voltaire
>Irrelevant in the 17th century
>Prussia ended up better anyways

>Be Benjamin Hornigold
>Wake up every morning to smell one of the Queen's socks
>Pay ten thousand pounds in taxes so she can get another shit bucket
>go to my overlord Woodes Rogers
>Bow to him and kiss his feet asking him to fuck you anally after he gets done fucking his 3 other gay noble husbands
>gives me a cargo ship but still thank him and try to equip swivel guns on it because he doesn't pay you enough to get cannons
>Stalk Charles Vane and sniff every piece of clothing he wore
>be absolutely useless because you're such a fuck-up of a pirate hunter that a hurricane kills you before Black Bart could slit your throat

fuck rome :)

you're just salty

I don't think your hope is the same hope of Kierkegaard

>be me, just a random guy in the senate
>hear brutus laughing and giggling with some other dude
>he is my gymbro so i ask him what's up
>he says that they are going to stab the emperor
>lol'ed like pic related
>you can't bro, you don't have the nuts, fuck your prank bullshit anyways
>he says: "just shut up and wait, pussy"
>meanwhile my face is still like pic related

any other britbongs here? just signed up with /ourgirl/ and about to go HEEM some r*man benders

>lecture ends
>we get outside
>omg fucker got a knife was hiding a knife all the time
>damn that ghetto nigger was serious
>i say: "maan, don't.. pls, it's not worth it, he is a dude."
>THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN, he and some other fags actually STAB HIM TO DEATH in front of the senate
>FUCK.JPG
>OMFGFUCK.JPG
>face is now like pic related
>got a huge trauma
>couldn't speak with him
>went home
>fucked my boy slave, had a huge dump on a random street
>relaxed for a while..

I meant that Kierkegaard was the hope that showed up, not the guy wanting down with Hebrews and return to Hellenism

Kierkegaard is a literally nobody. If you're reading something written after the early 2nd c. CE then you are doing everything wrong.

*Also, texts must be written in greek or chinese, and must not originate east of Ionia and west of China.

Spaniards btfo 4 da real kangz!

Kriekegaard founded existentialism

lmao "existentialism" okay m8, chin up, I'm sure there were worse ideas in the world.

What the fuck is all this graffiti? Why are there paintings of naked spartan shits on my wall?

IMMIGRANT DETECTED!!! Every TRUE Greek would expect these types of murals.

>in a world without gold, we might have been heroes!
youtu.be/pywicn3SXPk?t=567
I still blame myself for this

A sunset glimmer if you will

Scotbro reporting in.

>be israelite
>get BABYLONED

>not having a group of nords untied to the politics of your realm to guard you
[laughs in byzantine]

>Sells out greece to the persians.

Meme tier nonsense

Are you saying the Semitic peoples of Africa are our greatest allies?

Vandalism of the Herms was an inside job. Alcibiades did nothing wrong!

Daily reminder to only buy Carthaginian high quality olive oil and not that Greek piss

Not that user and yes it does and yes he is. I've been working on my American civic religion mimicking roman state religion. Trying to revitalize, codify and dissemble foundational myths and ideas that are important to le 56% civilization

I see a future Legatus, a statesman, a physician, a philosopher. Anyone of them could be the next Aristotle, he was a foreigner too remember, bigot?

Who here /peltast/?

DO IT AGAIN GENESERIC!

>muh noble savages
Fuck off Tacitus, go live with the forestniggers if you love them so much.

>hopefully we will dedicate ourselves wholly to philosophy
Have you seen the absolute state of the youth?

>Be Carthaginian
>Get sacked
>Get sacked again
When will you empirelets learn?

>alexander the great
>his empire shatters almost immeidatly after his death
lol at shitty hellens thinking they're superior to the might persian cock

TheRomansstarted their conquestsunder the rather childish delusion that they were going to burn everyone else, and nobody was going to burn them.At Carthage, Gallica, Palestine and half a hundred other places, they put their rather naive theory into operation.They started the scourge, and now they are going to feel the scourge of god

The Romans started their conquests under the rather childish delusion that they were going to burn everyone else, and nobody was going to burn them.At Carthage, Gallica, Palestine and half a hundred other places, they put their rather naive theory into operation.They started the scourge, and now they are going to feel the scourge of god

>BIG TURKIC HORSEMAN
>little roman iInfantry

Roaches are animals

>Angry gay noises as your flanks crumble
lol, Persians thinking their superior to the might of Alexander's cock.

Where the hell did you read about Chinese promoting classical texts?

Say that to my face

ROMAN BREAD
FOR TRVE ROMANS

>takes your Constantinople
Nothing personal habibi

Carthage was sacked once Rome was sacked many times.

How are you not permabanned yet?

Of course, for who would sack an open field?

So you prefer being a whore over being dead.

Daily reminder that If you don't have light hair you are not Roman.

I prefer being a free Roman citizen who shall dictate the fate of human history rather than being a lowly slave.

>roman citizen
>dictating anything other than his tax debts to the emperor
>having a say in anything

>march to the ends of the Earth
>conquer strange and foreign lands
>bring civilization to the fringes of humanity
>get a fuckton of farmland in the process
>live out your life farming cabbages and fucking newly civilized indigenous peoples
>meanwhile in Carthage...

>thinking that the average roman citizen did any of those things
>implying that roman citizens "brought civilization" and not rampant degeneracy
>conquer deserts and the greeks
>can't conquer naked tribesmen
>your own political system failed
>get sacked 1000000 times
>even today, there are 2 states in the city of Rome
Literal whore of a city.

>t. asshurt kraut who will never be white

Quality shitposting.

There is little evidence Carthage was literally salted. North Africa became a breadbasket and Carthage's merchants (in the colonies) were quickly absorbed into Roman trade networks after Carthage was taken.

>kraut
Oh my god you couldn't be more wrong if you tried
Rome is still Babylon.

Rome is literally Trojan

Uh, everywhere, President Xi literally said so himself. Also, just go to China and talk to people, they love classical history and have a tremendous sense of respect for pre-Qin texts. Also, "muh 5000 year history" is probably the national slogan.