How would you beat him?

Illusionz
Illusionz

how would you beat him?

personally i think the lifters would die first

All urls found in this thread:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4amRA0jl0qI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZUsj8Q68q4
https://youtu.be/KujmrcF0ZxU
https://youtu.be/nAN-lZHbYWE?t=88
Stark_Naked
Stark_Naked

@Illusionz
I'd throw a little boy into his enclosure.

viagrandad
viagrandad

@Illusionz
what scenario are you implying?
are we all just around a raging silverback?

PackManBrainlure
PackManBrainlure

@viagrandad
empty plane, you vs gorilla, no weapons so you can run but not run away from the fight

WebTool
WebTool

Deep water. They can't swim.

TurtleCat
TurtleCat

@WebTool
that's what they WANT you to think.

Ignoramus
Ignoramus

@PackManBrainlure
This scenario is 100% unwinnable by even the strongest man in the world.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4amRA0jl0qI

Lunatick
Lunatick

@Ignoramus
to reiterate:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZUsj8Q68q4

If you think you could break that glass you are wrong.

Snarelure
Snarelure

@PackManBrainlure
no weapons
So you're literally putting me at an evolutionary disadvantage that millions of years have been devoted to. No spear, no rock chucking, no gun, no bow and arrow, no sword or halberd, nothing.

I'd lay on my back and wait for him to leave, hoping he won't bother me. Or shoot him because I always have my gun you liberal socialist fuck.

DeathDog
DeathDog

@Illusionz
Work on your english OP

PackManBrainlure
PackManBrainlure

@Lunatick
JESUS TITTY FUCKING CHRIST

King_Martha
King_Martha

@Ignoramus
banana trees are a grass

SniperWish
SniperWish

@Ignoramus
dont think you could out endure him?

ZeroReborn
ZeroReborn

@SniperWish
Easily. That thing is huge and bulky, I'd dodge his attacks until he gasses out and beat his ass with superior speed. I mean this legit, not even trolling, I could outlast a gorilla by dodging and hit him when he's tired. Simple boxing mechanics.

takes2long
takes2long

@ZeroReborn
thinking your punches could even hurt it
Wew

Methshot
Methshot

@Snarelure
no halberd

PackManBrainlure
PackManBrainlure

@ZeroReborn
go punch a sleeping silverback and see what happens, im sure it would be happy to let you know if it felt anything if you could even wake it up

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

@takes2long
What the fuck are you smoking? If it tires out, you'll hurt it. Kick the balls, gouge the eyes, throat punches, kicks to the face if you can. You'll hurt it, trust me, gorillas are just fat strong (and slow) apes. If you think you can't outlast and outspeed a 400lb 5'11 fatass powerlifter you're fucking outa shape and need to go back to the gym.

LuckyDusty
LuckyDusty

@ZeroReborn
exactly my plan of attack, i hope theyre not too fast though

ZeroReborn
ZeroReborn

@Burnblaze
you are assuming you can dodge even one attack, then you are assuming you can continue to do so for hours and hours and hours, i dont think you realize the stamina of a silverback

New_Cliche
New_Cliche

@Burnblaze
comparing a gorilla to a powerlifter
Fucking hell do you know how fast and strong gorillas actually are?

Nojokur
Nojokur

@ZeroReborn
what the fuck are you some sort of gorilla scientist

Garbage Can Lid
Garbage Can Lid

@Nojokur
no, but something tells me you are a few fries short of a happy meal

Lord_Tryzalot
Lord_Tryzalot

@ZeroReborn
superior speed
o im laffin
gorillas run 20-25 mph

haveahappyday
haveahappyday

@Lord_Tryzalot
Usain Bolt ran ~27mph, again, superior speed.
@ZeroReborn
What makes you think I can't? What makes you think a gorilla will stay interested in chasing me for hours on end anyway? He'll get tired or bored quickly.
@New_Cliche
fast
slow
strong
That's all they got.
@PackManBrainlure
I would, but your father might be upset I punched his wife.

lostmypassword
lostmypassword

@haveahappyday
Holy shit are you Usain Bolt?
Also, do you really think he could hold that speed for more than a couple of seconds?

Skullbone
Skullbone

@lostmypassword
Holy shit are you Usain Bolt?
I don't have to be, I understand basic human mechanics in adrenaline overload and the fight or flight response. The gorilla isn't having that response. Besides, I only need to outrun him for a minute. The fuck you think is going to happen? You seriously think a gorilla is going to chase me down for 2 miles or some shit? The fuck did I do to him, fuck his wife? He'll run up on me if I get too close, but if I start running he's not going to give a shit anyway.

If we were caged, I'd use my ability to run and turn faster to my advantage and wait until he gasses out. Again, balls, eye, throat... I also know I can get him in guard and keep him from hurting me as long as I defend myself.

AwesomeTucker
AwesomeTucker

@Skullbone
So if encaged the gorilla will just stand there motionless letting you gouge at its eyes. You do know animals also have adrenaline like instincts especially when in a cornered situation

I'd use my ability to run and turn faster
You aren't faster than a gorilla m8 get it through the your thick skull which is probably the closest in common you have with a gorilla

CodeBuns
CodeBuns

@ZeroReborn
kek

Dreamworx
Dreamworx

@Skullbone

Such bait

Gigastrength
Gigastrength

@Dreamworx
Such bait
Why? We aren't talking about a grizzly or tiger, we're talking about a fucking vegetarian gorilla. The fucking thing has no reason to chase me down.

Harmless_Venom
Harmless_Venom

@CodeBuns
Thanks for the post freind

Ignoramus
Ignoramus

@Skullbone
https://youtu.be/KujmrcF0ZxU
you'd probably shit yourself the second that thing got mad

idontknow
idontknow

@Ignoramus
This other gorilla stole a baby gorilla and ran off with it
Is this a species protection thing, or a "I'm going to kill that baby gorilla because it's not mine" thing?

Burnblaze
Burnblaze

@Ignoramus
i watched this video and have been on youtube for 2 hours now watching videos of gorillas.

BlogWobbles
BlogWobbles

@Skullbone
still thinking you have 'm-m-m-muh speed and dexterity'

this thing is 400 fucking pounds and look how it climbs up that tree

https://youtu.be/nAN-lZHbYWE?t=88

it jumped on a fucking loose ass rope and didn't stumble a fucking bit

you're dead

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