Mom is making me miss my usual workout tomorrow and go to a job fair at a restaurant so I can stop being such a leech. I dont want to go and am nervous but she said she would take away my gym membership if i dont grow up.
She made me buy new dress pants and shirt and shoes. I'm 30 yo and my resume is shit, got fired from literally all my past jobs. I have no restaurant experience. I'm literally going to be shaking and sweating tomorrow.
How do I not fuck this up fit bros. Sip first?
Make fart jokes while in the interview to lighten the mood
works every time for me
Hmm if you're nervous i recommemd doubling down on tne sips bro.
There's no helping you. You'd literally need AT LEAST a year long man-camp to make you an actual man
my gainz will be gone since mum will have cucked me and cancelled my membership
reading shit like this makes me feel good about not being such a fuck up
>Drinking an energy drink before an interview
Don't fucking do this. You'll be all jittery on top of the nervousness you already get for being at an interview.
Smile, be polite, but don't be so stiff you come off like a robot. Interviews honestly aren't that hard, at least from my experience. Usually, as long as I can actually get the interview, I have that shit in the bag.
Yo Jason,
when is Andrew gonna release another DRM?
If you're not jason, you're more pathetic than him.
How do I bring my resume in breh? Fold it up and put it in pocket or ?
A manila folder jesus christ
>Sip first?
yeah the sip thread people being complete failures of human beings makes perfect sense actually
>30
>job fair
>restaurant
please kill yourself.
Save me the taxes.
Post your resume and I will critique it. Part of my job is reviewing resume and doing interviews. What sort of position are you looking for?
Get one of these if possible. Your family might have one lying around. Otherwise, you should be able to buy a cheap one at Staples.
Although considering your situation, a manila folder would be fine. Make sure not to crumple that shit up.
Am i fucked? I only have 1 decent reference, the other one was a really bad firing, can never talk to him again lmao
I don't even know where to start with this. Okay...
Change your professional summary to something that sells your skills. Obviously you want to move on to safer work, nobody wants to paint forever. Write about the skills from your painting job that will carry over to a white-collar job (timeliness, attention to detail, self-management, etc)
You need to explain what you completed under your work history. Were you in charge of a team? Were your clients high-end, and did you have to manage their expectations? How fast could you complete your projects? Did you typically finish ahead of schedule?
You have a degree, which I assume is from a good school. You have a certificate, which I assume is from a money suck. Specify what your bachelor's degree is in.
I'd consider taking a front-end development course and building up a small portfolio of websites. Coding is not as hard to learn as people think. Try to get a job at a consultancy or do your own work freelance. You'll struggle to find a typical white collar job with your work history - you'll probably be more fulfilled doing creative work anyway.
>there are people with bachelors degrees that can't even make a half decent fucking resume
It may be too late to change anything now. This same resume got me 2 previous interviews to restaurants, but I didnt have the right clothes, only had jeans and sneaks
what you gonna do in the restaurant?
also, now is a great time to look into actual blue collar labor my dude, such as construction, moving, masonry. Economy is booming, if you are jacked and not a drunk they'll hire you.
The skills I had at the painting jobs were 1) how to climb on a ladder 2) how not to fall off 3) how to balance on scaffolding
Nigga its not too late to change anything if you want a good job.
Strive for more than restaurant jobs, you don't want to be working service your whole life. You don't need a resume to find a job waiting tables.
Restaurants aren't too picky, honestly. As long as you come off like you actually want to get the job (even if you don't, at least act like you do) and dress accordingly, you should be okay.
This has to be fucking bait no one could ever be this shitty at making a resume. Jesus dude the example templates in Microsoft word have more substance than that. Google "what is a resume". Fuck. Like, you went to college, why?
found the fuck up in the thread
The person who gave me the template is a lawyer at my gym
This is pretty good advice.
While I don't know if you've ever done proper manual labor or not, OP, it sounds like you've been spending more time in the gym than you have trying to actually pursue any sort of career.
Why not use that to your advantage? Unless you're a complete klutz, you can at least get a job that lets you use your strength for something.
I mean shit, maybe even try to get a trash collecting gig. It sounds bad, but it actually pays pretty well, and the benefits are solid since it's a government job.
>30 and still taking mommy's money and doing what she tells you