China's Basest Warlord

Quick post about a colorful character.

> Zhang Zongchang kept some 30 to 50 concubines of different nationalities, including Koreans, Japanese, White Russians, French and Americans, who were given numbers since he could not remember their names nor speak their language. He was free with his gifts, lavishly squandering money and concubines on superiors and friends. As a result, his commanders were very loyal to him, contributing to his military success. According to the wife of Wellington Koo:

>[Zhang] was known everywhere as the "Three Don't Knows". He said he didn't know how much money he had, how many concubines, or how many men in his army.

> After defeating the army of general Wu Peifu by making his enemy's forces defect, he rewarded the defectors by allowing them to keep their original ranks. He then promoted his own officers, but since there was not enough metal to make the gold and silver stars for their rank insignia, he ordered the stars to be made from the gold and silver paper foil in cigarette packages.

> During one of his campaigns, he publicly announced he would win the battle or come home in his coffin. When his troops were forced back he was true to his word—he was paraded through the streets, sitting in his coffin and smoking a large cigar.

> Zhang was thrown into the spotlight again when he "accidentally" shot Prince Xiankai, a cousin of the deposed emperor Puyi. According to Zhang the gun he was holding while standing at his hotel window happened to go off and shoot the young prince in the back, killing him instantly, though it was more likely he killed the playboy prince for dallying with one of Zhang's many concubines. He was charged, found guilty by a Japanese court and given the choice between 15 days' imprisonment or a $150 (US) fine. He chose the fine.

Other urls found in this thread:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yan_Xishan
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

You could shoot someone in the back, get found guilty, and only face a $150 fine?

Jesus Christ, what a mess Asia was in the early 20th century.

He was a warlord and shooted a playboy that everyone wanted to see dead

After learning to read at the age of 30, Zhang also became an avid poet.

混蛋诗
你叫我去这样干,
他叫我去那样干。
真是一群大混蛋,
全都混你妈的蛋。

Poem about bastards
> You tell me to do this
> he tells me to do that
> You are all bastards
> Go fuck your mother
The last line is actually a pun, but it's hard to translate.

求雨
玉皇爷爷也姓张,
为啥为难俺张宗昌?
三天之内不下雨,
先扒龙皇庙,
再用大炮轰你娘。

Praying for rain
> The sky god is also named Zhang
> Why does he make life difficult for me (also named Zhang)
> If it doesn't rain in three days
> First I'll demolish your temple
> Then I'll use cannons to bombard your mom

无题
要问女人有几何,
俺也不知多少个。
昨天一孩喊俺爹,
不知他娘是哪个?

Untitled
> someone asks me how many women I have
> I really don't know either.
> Yesterday a kid called me dad
> no idea who his mother is

游西方
早听西方好,
他妈真不孬。
本想多玩玩,
睁眼却没了。

Touring the west
> I've heard that the west is great
> motherfuckers weren't wrong
> wanted to stay and play some more
> open my eyes and it all vanishes

天上闪电

忽见天上一火链,好象玉皇要抽烟。
如果玉皇不抽烟,为何又是一火链。

Lightning
> I saw lightning in the sky, it's like god want's to take a smoke (Opium).
> If god doesn't smoke, why is there another lightning

俺也写个大风的歌

大炮开兮轰他娘,威加海内兮回家乡。
数英雄兮张宗昌,安得巨鲸兮吞扶桑。

I too will write a poem about the wind
> Let the cannons bombard your mom, I'm returning home after I conquer the coastline
> Many heroes all praise me

i've known about this guy for a while now but this poetry is fucking hilarious

wtf i love the warlord era now

Here's the last few, continued from 游泰山

远看泰山黑糊糊,上头细来下头粗。
如把泰山倒过来,下头细来上头粗。

Visiting Mount Tai

>From afar Mount Tai looks blackish, narrow on top and wide at the bottom
>If you flip the mountain upside down, it would be narrow at the bottom and wide at the top

大明湖

大明湖 明湖大
大明湖里有荷花
荷花上面有蛤蟆
一戳一蹦达

A big pond

> The big pond is bright, the bright bond is big
> There's a lotus leaf in the pond
> There's a frog on top of the leaf
> it leaped into the pond

游蓬莱阁

好个蓬莱阁,
他妈真不错。
神仙能到的,
俺也坐一坐。
靠窗摆下酒,
对海唱高歌。
来来猜几拳,
舅子怕喝多!

Visiting Penglai Pavillion

> What a pavillion
> place is fucking nice
> if the gods can get here
> I'll take a seat too
> Have a drink by the window
> Sing some songs to the ocean
> Play some cards
> I think I'm going to overdrink

Note that the Penglai Pavillion is a place of some religious importance in Chinese folk religion, as the place where the either immortals crossed the sea.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yan_Xishan
He was pretty based and Zhang Zoulin was kinda interesting

>From afar Mount Tai looks blackish, narrow on top and wide at the bottom
>If you flip the mountain upside down, it would be narrow at the bottom and wide at the top
the fucking Shakespeare of our age

> You tell me to do this
> he tells me to do that
> You are all bastards
> Go fuck your mother

> First I'll demolish your temple
> Then I'll use cannons to bombard your mom

...

Greentext 90 years before it's time.

>When his troops were forced back he was true to his word—he was paraded through the streets, sitting in his coffin and smoking a large cigar.

...

Keep in mind that this was more than a common peasant would earn in a decade.

You forgot the fact that his nickname was the 'Dogmeat general' probably the best nickname of the warlord era

I knew that, but I just thought it was less funny than his poetry and not worth including.

...

I have literally read this ad verbatim over half a decade ago. What gives?

What a fucking boss.

>From afar Mount Tai looks blackish, narrow on top and wide at the bottom
>If you flip the mountain upside down, it would be narrow at the bottom and wide at the top
I haven't keked this hard in a week.

It's wikipedia.

the original 4chantard

2deep4me

>I think I'm going to overdrink
a good man.