YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT?!

> YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT?!

> YOU CAN'T TELL? JUST TAKE A LOOK AT THE WIDTH OF MY PELVIC REGION, YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE I'M A WOMAN.

> QUIT STARING AT MY PELVIS YOU SICK FUCK!!!

> ACTUALLY JOKING, I'M A DUDE, BUT MY OLD ONE GOT SMASHED. STOLE THESE OFF OF SOME CHICK. YOU COULD SAY I'M A PROUD TRANS-PELVIC SKELETON. GET IT?

> HOW DOES IT FEEL, YOU ASK?

> FUCKING BOW-LEGGED.

> WHICH ACTUALLY BRINGS ME TO OUR MAIN TOPIC. YOUR FIGHTER BUDDY DOESN'T LOOK LIKE HE'S WAKING UP FROM HIS DIRT-NAP ANY TIME SOON. DO YOU THINK I COULD TRY HIS ON FOR SIZE?

Well, we'll need to check the resurrection spell again. If it can regenerate some bone then yeah go for it. But he might need it for the whole coming back to life thing to work.
And yes, it is going to take a while. I usually just cast the damned thing, I don't know exactly how it works without checking.

Dude, now that you pointed out you're wearing someone else's pelvis, that's kind of weird.

> OH, SO ME USING SOMEONE'S BONES TO FUCKING WALK SO I'M NOT PARAPLEGIC IS WEIRD? IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE THAT COMING FROM THE GROUP THAT LOOKS ABOUT READY TO LOOT YOUR OWN FRIEND'S BODY FOR HIS MAGIC SHIT.

> PELOR'S BLESSED TAINT, YOU ADVENTURING TYPES ARE TOO DAMN PRIVELEGED. NO HOKEY SHIT LIKE THAT IN THE KING'S ARMY. TOO EXPENSIVE.

Screw all this. I'll just turn undead

Wait wait wait wait wait- Bone man here is our only guide to this blasted place!

> THAT'S RIGHT. I KNOW THIS PLACE BETTER THAN THE MOLDY CUNTLICKER THAT CALLS HIMSELF A LICH DOES. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT GUY? TRIED TO GIVE ME ORDERS, TELLING ME TO PATROL THE AREA. FORTUNATELY I'M IMMUNE TO HIS COMMANDS DUE TO NOT GIVING TWO SHITS.

> AND YOU THINK YOU'RE THE FIRST GUY TO USES THAT SPELL ON ME? I GET A LAUGH EVERY TIME SOME HOLY PENCILDICK TRIES TO TURN ME. I JUST ROTATE 90 DEGREES.

its easier to sex a skeleton by looking at the skull, imo

Can... can you swap for a woman's jawbone too? [Spoiler]it's my fetish... [/spoiler]

Phenice would like a word with you.

> OH, YOU DON'T EVEN NEED TO BE A SKELETON TO DO THAT. I CAN ALREADY TELL JUST BY LOOKING AT YOU THAT YOU'RE A CUNT.

> SURE, AND WHILE WE'RE AT IT YOU CAN FULFILL ONE OF MY FETISHES. I REALLY WANT TO SEE YOU GO AND FUCK YOURSELF.

...

Wait, I forget, what were we looking for again? I think I took one blow too many to the helm in that last fight.

Anyway, I mean, sure I guess. He doesn't need all his bones for when we resurrect him right? Owww.

>I GET A LAUGH EVERY TIME SOME HOLY PENCILDICK TRIES TO TURN ME. I JUST ROTATE 90 DEGREES
New magic item idea, thanks skelebro

>Ring of Undead Turning
>turns undead slightly to the right. Does not count as an action for the turned creature

Question. Is the intelligent undead thing supposed to be like how a ghost is intelligent?
Because I'm pretty sure you don't have a brain, even though I know you're gonna try to turn that back on me.

We're looking for some amulet or other, they're all the same these days.
Also, yeah, his bones come back.
He'll just feel weird the first few days.

> HONESTLY, THAT'S A LOAD OF METAPHYSICAL BULLSHIT PROPAGATED BY FLESHBAGS. I ONCE SAW SOME DRUID GO THROUGH HERE WHO AWAKENED HIS FAMILIAR. IT WAS HILARIOUS HOW THIS IDIOT THOUGHT HE WAS STILL IN CHARGE, YET HIS MOUSE BUDDY WAS LEADING HIM BY THE NOSE.

I was just gonna draw dicks on him, but this is a much better idea.

just use reincarnation, its much more silly and fun.

i thought skeletons spoke in smᴀMMcᴀps

whoa, i guess smallcaps dont work on Veeky Forums, that sucks.

> SWEET! HEY, CAN I DO THIS HILARIOUS THING WHERE I MAKE HIM MY MEAT PUPPET BY SHOVING MY ARM HALFWAY UP HIS A-

> NO? ALRIGHT THEN, SPOIL MY FUN WHY DON'T YOU?

> HEY, I'VE GOT A BETTER IDEA. SINCE HE JUST REGENEREATES, AND WE'RE GONNA RIP OUT HIS BALLS ANYWAY, LET'S SLAP HIM AROUND WITH HIS OWN DISMEMBERED DICK.

> WHILE WE'RE AT IT, WE COULD ALWAYS KILL AND REINCARNATE YOU AS WELL. ANYTHING ELSE HAS GOT TO BE BETTER THAN BEING A LITTLE BITCH.