Red Flags at the Table and How you Deal with Them

>Player mentions he likes Anime, Big Bang Theory or Sports
>Plays a fire caster
>Has Tumblr
>Plays "undesirable" Races (Elves, Gnomes, Kender, Catfolk)
>Backstory over five sentences
>Doesn't like Realistic settings

Anyone got horror stories or stories how he dealt with Shit players?

Here is your (you) for bringing a player's out-of-game hobbies into your judgement of their in-game performance. We should probably start interviewing players on the porn habits while we're at it, and what video game console is their favorite, and whether they like Pepsi or Coke more.

My roll20 screening process:

>likes anime - out
>male playing a female character - out
>female - out
>novel-length backstory - out, does he even expect me to read all that shit?
>"does your game use Spheres of Might/Power?" - out

>he said, attaching a picture of animu girl

You can't "distance" yourself from your hobbies. If you have them, they already have polluted you, and it's inevitable you'll start bringing this shit into where it doesn't belong.

>>Player mentions he likes Anime, Big Bang Theory or Sports
Perfectly fine as long as they don't bring that shit into the game. The way to deal with this is to not be a faggot and make a big deal out of it.

>>Plays a fire caster
Yes, because a caster with a focus is so much worse for game balance than a caster who bypasses every encounter ever because they're a batman wizard with spells for every occasion. The way to deal with this is to not be a faggot. and get assblasted over it.

>>Has Tumblr
Just like a players out-of-game hobbies, this has zero relevance to the game as long as they don't bring that shit into the game. The way to deal with it is to not be a faggot and obsess over it.

>>Plays "undesirable" Races (Elves, Gnomes, Kender, Catfolk)
I get Kender and Furfags, but if you're gonna start banning elves you might as well play a human-only setting. The way to deal with this is to not be a faggot and tell your players you just wana do a human-only game.

>>Backstory over five sentences
Did you ask for 5 sentences? Or did you ask for a backstory talking about family and pre-adventurer-life? The way to deal with this is to not be a faggot and be clear about what your want with your perspective players.

>>Doesn't like Realistic settings
The way to deal with this is to not be a historical-accuracy faggot and realize you're playing a game with magic and dragons.


Wow... sure seems like alot of these problems can be avoided by simply not being a faggot like OP is.

>help, I'm still looking for people to play with me. any tips?

>>likes anime - out
MUH ANEEMAY BOOGIEMAN

>>male playing a female character - out
This one is fair if it's awkward for everyone else in the group, but most of the time it just shows you don't trust your players to play someone different than them, which is kind of the point of roleplaying.

>>female - out
Nigga, you gay?

>>novel-length backstory - out, does he even expect me to read all that shit?
No arguments here.

>>"does your game use Spheres of Might/Power?" - out
Pure autism. Stop playing 3.5/Pathfinder.

>male playing female
I can understand this one; 90% of the time it is cringe, but I've seen it done well a good few times.
>female
Even without going into the whole "how many fedoras do you own?" route, you indirectly only allow male PCs? Why are you restricting possible roleplaying avenues? That just seems weird

I actually DM. I can afford to be picky.

>"n-no relevance"
read Also, fireshits are worse than batman wizards. They ALWAYS, IN 100% CASES are spotlight-stealing, pyromaniac, lolrandumb cunts. Same with elves.

i don't want all-human setting because orcs and dwarfs are bro-tier.

OH SHIT ITS THE Veeky Forums FUN POLICE

The only things I really consider red flags are obvious fetish characters, obvious blatant rip-offs, and special donut steel OC snowflake characters that the players try to bring to every table.

They're all usually easy enough to pick out, even when screening for Roll20 games.

>I actually DM. I can afford to be picky.

>Help, I'm still looking for more players because playing with one other person sucks, any tips?


fyi, you don't sound like a very good, or exciting GM.

>I only play with people who like the same media I do and don't have any new and scary ideas from the foreign china-cartoon boogeyman.

Have you tried playing with people who are over the age of 15? Are you aware this is an 18+ website?

My roll20 red flag.
>What time is the game.
I always list game times and the timezone, anyone asking that didn't read my thread.

>roleplaying opportunity
>"teehee i'm a GIRL who pretends to be a boy but actually as capable as boy! Silly boys!"
i saw it many times, and each time it's somehow more cringy than before.

Good job actually posting something relevant to this topic that wasn't just shitty bait.

see
Seriously, I don't see how this shit is possible unless you're playing with high-school kids. Nobody is actually this cringey in real life unless they're suffering from a mental disability, and if they are they're probably not finding their way into your living room to play DnD with you.

>Nobody is actually this cringey in real life
In RL, maybe not. On roll20? 90% are like that because you can't punch people over the internet

One red flag isn't enough, I'm usually willing to be patient for 7-8 flags

>>Doesn't like Realistic settings
Hello, faggot police? OP is on the loose again

>Complaining about anime on an website that's all about weeb culture.

>I'm gonna miss tomorrow's session guys
>after having missed one two weeks ago and having left early in the previous one

We're only 6 weeks into the campaign and half our sessions and one player has made us miss just under half of our sessions. I'm not even the GM, but it's driving me insane.

The only Realistic setting game I enjoyed was a mountain climbing adventure using GURPS. We broke out every single rule for climbing in snow capped mountains and fudged zero rolls. The goal? Get to the top and then back down.

Normally I like some kind of fantastical element to exist. Be it advanced future tech or magic.

But that's all of them, user.

What a trite and obvious piece of bait.

Anyone with taste buds knows that Pepsi is the superior beverage.

>all about weeb culture
>less than a third of the boards are weeb related
>less than a quarter of traffic is weeb related
I like anime but come on man.

>Making up statistics out of thin air.
I like shitposting, but come on man.

I have a pretty big red flag:
>considers elves an undesirable race
Untouchable tier cunt, disregard everything he says.

This was board traffic from 2015.

I'll search around for some more concrete numbers if you want.

I know people don't like to talk about GG, but you should probably bear in mind how much cross-traffic there was between /v/ and the jap boards prior to that whole mess unfurling.

That was 2014, by the way.

Being a female is a mental deficiency. If it wasn't for tits we'd have gone extinct millions of years ago.

...

Do you people seriously play with people you're not already friends with?

The autism is palpable

>Asks about the realism on the setting.
>Wants to change the game's medium
(voice>text>IRL whatever)

You sound like a walking red flag

>Plays "undesirable" Races
Listen here you massive faggot, if you are DMing a game you are the one who has responsibility for laying down what you don't want to appear in the game. It's not the players fault if your autism gets triggered because they decided to play a gnome or some shit.
People like you are why this hobby gets looked down on. You insufferable neckbearded cunt.

...

Have you thought these races are undesirable because he put in his ad that players shouldn't play them? That'd mean they prepare characters before even asking to join and don't read everything, that's bad.

I feel you OP. Here are some of my red flags:
>mentions how they don't like anime
>uses the world "undesirable" to describe stuff they don't like
>always brings up realism
>posts shity bait on Veeky Forums

> /b/ 40% loli threads
> /v/ - dozens of threads everyday on /a/ weeb games

Trying to deny 4chanzos weebishness is foolish friendo. Just because the subject at surface value doesn't look like it has weeb shit in it also doesn't mean anons haven't found a way to inject weeb shit into it.

>Be in party with a druid. He's not the only other PC but he's the one that matters here
>Kill fish monster and druid decides to harvest it's stomach to use as a waterskin
>"What do I roll to try to put leeches in here?"
>Spends the rest if the session trying to fill his new waterskin with leeches because medicine until eventually he gets some
>A later encounter featured our fighter getting seriously hurt. On a scale of 1 to 48 he was around 6.
>"I'm gonna use the leeches to try to cure him"

>we'd
TITS OR GTFO!

>Have you tried playing with people who are over the age of 15? Are you aware this is an 18+ website?

protip watching cartoons after the age of 14 is probably a sign you're either a pedo or a child

Not the user your talking about, but that's fine when he asked players to not play them. However, if he didn't say shit, then he should man up and put the disclaimer on next time if a gnome is going to rustle his jimmies that badly.

>protip being on Veeky Forums after the age of 14 is probably a sign you're either a pedo or a child

Theres nothing wrong with liking sports, you faggot/baiter

>Implying there aren't some anime series more Veeky Forums than anything besides systems you like
>Implying an old man fire mage isn't rad

Not that user, I believe the rancid bait dropping troll was saying that if it were not for tits, and the strong male attraction thereof, we *as a species* would have gone extinct.
At any rate, women aren't going to go extinct separately from men.

If "that's the joke", then it was a meager joke indeed.

If only there was an automated autism matchmaking website to sort out every permutation of autism wanted in an in-group, all the tears and heartache would be unnecessary

I thought that was Veeky Forums?

I am not a bot though.

What a fag.

There are people who legit think they can be Christian fundamentalist and go on /b/, the weeb paradox is far from the worse.

That's what I meant, and it wasn't a joke. Anything that acted like women would be exterminated like the destructive animals they are.

You really need to get laid

Do you really think that's safe?

True, not sure his heart could take it.

I meant leaving a woman alone with him.

Or a dude, whatever.

Yes I get it. I was making a joke

s-sorry user.

That's clever bait, slipping BBT in there to make all your blatantly stupid criteria for "red flags" seem legitimate. 7/8, not bad.

Anyone with obnoxiously dyed hair.

>Player self-insert
>rage the second shit goes south

fuck people who do this

>Mentioning you like sports is bad
I bet if a table employed pushup tests for players you couldn't pass.

>Big bang theory meme

It's an okay sitcom, nothing remarkable but nothing remarkably bad either.

>Nerd minstrel! Nerd minstrel!

The main cast are highly qualified scientists with steady jobs, and the nerdy references are 90% of the time referencing actual properties rather than something the writer pulled out his ass. Yes, Sheldon is clearly a barely functioning autist and they're shit with girls, but are you really gonna say that ain't how nerds are?

If there's any problem in this regard it's how the Jewish and Indian guys are presented as ridiculous stereotypes. More actual minstrel than "nerd minstrel".

>I saw a clip with no laugh track and it was really awkward

Yes that's because of the constant long pauses for the laugh track to play. Any sitcom that uses that crappy device sounds awkward as hell with the track removed.

>protip watching cartoons after the age of 14 is probably a sign you're either a pedo or a child
>mfw

>made us miss

How does that work exactly, why not just carry on like everyone else does?

>join 5e group
>there's a girl with dyed hair in it
>playing a bard stripper
>makes sex jokes

>likes anime
Fuck off weeb
>likes lolis or wants to play one
Fuck off pedo
>likes LotR
Fuck off, you unimaginative fag, grow some imagination
>plays a animal-based race
Fuck off furfag
>plays a caster
Fuck off munchkin fag
>is a vegan or a woman
Fuck off and die.
>constantly shits about systems other than D&D
Fuck off and play that shit by yourself, nobody wants your crap.
>unironically visits Veeky Forums
Fuck off, autismo