Alright Veeky Forums I'm gonna tell you the story of Lunk the Barbarian

Alright Veeky Forums I'm gonna tell you the story of Lunk the Barbarian.

Also looking to see if any of you artistic people out there would draw this olympian

>DMing a game over Curse Voice (was before discord)
>Group of mostly noobs and dime-a-dozen casters/theives
>One guy rolls a half orc barbarian named Lunk
>Lunk is Chaotic Good
>Chaotic only in that he would accidently break things from his size
>LOVED gardening, kept the party fed
>One day Lunk's garden is attacked
>Lunk goes BERSERK
>Takes smashed watermelon and wears it as helmet as he destroys every raider in his melon patch
>Never takes it off
>Party complains of its rotting smell weeks later
>Lunk goes to village
>Finds blacksmith
>"I want a helmet that looks like a watermelon"
>Asked him to roll persuasion for shits and giggles
> SUPER high due to his abnormal charisma
>Blacksmith makes him a gorgeous barbarian helmet stained in the likeness of a watermelon, even painted it with scratch resistant paint for him
>Fast forward a year later
> Group has made it to the final trial
>Fighting the Cult of Yig, the god of Serpents
> Psionic Archer captured and ready to be sacrificed
>Battle going south, assassin bleeding out, cleric unconscious
>Portal to Yig's Domain opens, serpentlike hand reaches out for the Archer.
>Lunk lifts his head from his character sheet

>" I charge the hand, I want to force it back through."

>Silence at the table

>"Its very possible you might miss and/or be dragged into the portal."
>" I know."

>Lunk rolls... and goes quiet.
>Picture Image comes up: Nat 20
(He had custom dice, watermelon themed for this character, knew it was his. Most trustworthy guy I've ever known)
>Group erupts in cheers
>Just as the hand of Yig is about to grab the archer, Lunk grabs it by the finger and lets out the mightiest of roars, ripping the hand of a god back into its domain, him with it.
>Portal shuts behind him
>Cultists in despair, and quickly routed.
>Party crawls their way out of the temple

continued..

>Party crawls from the temple, barely alive
>Look up
>The skies are flashing with watermelon green lightning and serpentine fire
>As Lunk entered the realm of Yig, he ascended to godhood so that he might keep the Serpent King at bay and protect the world from his slithery tyranny
>Has been a god in every campaign I've ever run since

I miss that glorious bastard.

screencapped for eternity

>p

Swear if I see this shit somewhere I will be a happy man. Lunk deserves to be remembered.

I work fast, I shall spread this greentext

>Lolrandum character
>Subversion for the sake of subversion
>"Wow nat 20 so epic" story

Very cool, OP.
Very satirical. Me personally, I think this is a great thread, I mean, I, me personally, I love irony, and I think this is a great thread because it's so comically ironical.

Ugh, I just hate thread like this. I think all this autistic faggot shit needs to get off Veeky Forums, it's stealing board space from legitimate threads.

Found the chads

REAL chads don't shitpost here, my man, they shitpost /outside/.

Is there a Reddit that takes Greentext stories from Veeky Forums or something you're trying to placate?

Nah. Just wanted to share my favorite personal D&D story.

>watermelon helmet
>watermelon dice
>watermelon god

Wow what a whacky and funny game, OP!

I'm sure people really enjoy playing games with you user.

Good story OP, made me smile.

How about instead of saying it's shit, you all fuck off and let us enjoy it?

I'm going to go with "Something that never happened" Alex.

Agree it's a made up story. The custom watermelon dice. Gtfo

LOL HE'S A GOD OF MELONS

GET IT GAIZ?

>Lolsorandomwatermelon
>HighChrarisma
>Making up stories for upboats on leddit