In modern Dungeons and Dragons, characters heal so fast that they can literally tear off their skin with no ill effect

>In modern Dungeons and Dragons, characters heal so fast that they can literally tear off their skin with no ill effect.

How is this ok?

It's a game.

HP is not meat points, read the fucking books

The alternative is having to leaving 3/5 of the team be stuck in a bed for 5 months while the others wait around for them and to carry the wizard for the rest of the hike every time they get a rolled ankle.

>leaving 3/5 of the team be stuck in a bed for 5 months while the others wait around for them

Sound like a fun opportunity for side adventures!

and what do the other players do while you're running these 'side adventures'?

You give them sleeping pills.

4 points.

>1. HP is not meat points. You are a retard.
>2. HP is not for story kills. You are a retard.
>3. D&D characters are basically superheroes after a while. You are a retard.
>4. Properly prepared, a group of 4-6 PCs of even 4th level can kill a CR20 dragon if you rely entirely on nonmagical attacks and damage. You are a retard.

Have you never directed the crew of minions your PCs have gathered from a throne somewhere?

>OP is so retarded, they can literally just post a picture and shitty bait related to it

How is this okay?

4 points

>1. Doesn't matter if that's how the game treats it in practice.
>2. Read a book if you're just going railroad people to death.
>3. Invincible heroes are boring af and makes combat too easy.
>4. No they can't, you're fucking retarded, read the book and go back to 4th grade to learn basic mathematics.

It's not, but the pseudos cannot back down, even when it's on an anonymous imageboard that nobody will remember a week from today.

>Invincible heroes are boring af

Play a different game then

What is this post even saying? Are you OP?

That's not how the game treats it in practice. That's how idiots treat it.

Why even bother keeping track of HP? You're never going to die anyways so what's the point of pretending there are actual stakes and risk involved?

Hell, why not give everyone a complimentary handjob and a blue ribbon while we're at it? We're all here to win and show off how awesome we are, amirite fellas?

[citation needed]

So you made a thread to show off how much of an assburgers you are?

>That's not how the game treats it in practice.
I can count on one hand the amount of times D&D treats HP as something more than physical damage, and even then it boils down to a Fighter ability and a pep talk feat.

Now, when you can lower someone's HP by straight up roasting them with trash talk (and no, dealing psychic damage from vicious mockery or dissonant whispers doesn't count) then we can talk.

Damn, dude, troll for fun not to be spiteful.

A game with no stakes is just a highlight reel you haven't watched yet faggot.

The moment killing monsters results in you being able to take more axes to the face they are treating HP as more than meat points.

What's the point of playing a game if you're always going to win? Hell, the only way you're going to lose is if the GM outright stakes the deck in their favor and even then it's less strategy and more inflated numbers.

>"If my PCs dont die of tetanus after walking down an alley what thrill is there to have?"

Nigga did you just wake up from the short bus? Rewrite your post but this time, take a moment to proof read your shit you big dummy.

You are playing to tell a story.

>You can only lose when I tell you that you lose, not if you deserve it.
Oh boy, can't wait to witness the next big novel from Sir Faggotron of Southern comfort.

...

No, I'm playing a game, story doesn't just fall out of the GM's asshole like a colon after a week of eating nothing but Taco Bell.

Playing for story is like watching porn for the acting, nobody's going to stop you but at some point you're kinda missing the point.

Invincible players is a hyperbole

Too dumb to fix one sentence huh?

>Why even bother keeping track of HP? You're never going to die anyways
>tfw I've had 2 characters die in the current campaign (PotA)
>everyone else has died at least once

No, you are telling a story. Everyone at the table is.

>>I suck a million cocks
You literally can't describe a successful attack in DnD as anything other then a "hit, damage" because any more detail should incur in some penalty by basic logic.

...

What does cure wounds do?

>I can't do it so it's impossible!

And no story worth telling didn't have the protag going through some shit until they earned their goddamn victory.

Fuck, even Naruto lost battles and shit before he reached the end of his journey, so tell me why your campaign is somehow even more poorly written than mother-fucking-Na-ru-to!

Refresh and heal the mind and body.

Makes you feel good.

Go ahead, try to detail nonlethal HP damage to a PC

correct. HP is an abstraction.

plenty of other systems do this too. MnM was a useful tool for younger me to understand this. MnM is a super hero system and it doesn't have HP rather it has a " Toughness Save" where damage exists as a DC and you can roll against that dc to either suffer penalties or overcome the damage completely. Does that simulate reality? No. But it does simulate the "feel" of a comic book superhero fight better than HP would. Because you have the ability to just no sell hits it allows for cool moments like bullets bouncing off your skin and being completely fine and ready to fight after being punched through a sky scraper. The system simulates that, not reality.

DnD isn't trying to simulate an actual reality rather it's roots lie in trying to simulate Conan/and the other sword and sorcery stories that dominated early fantasy. in those stories violence was constant and conan could get hurt but his combat abilities ebbed and flowed rather than directly corresponding to explicitly explained injuries. fantasy has come a long way since then but that element of cool fights and exciting combat will always be there and the systems of the game should work to simulating that not our world. DnD wants to simulate the tempo and style of fantasy not reality. So don't ask it to.

So why is it called cure WOUNDS and not Refresh?

Because it heals wounds.

see my post here
wounds is a purposefully vague term, because vagueness benefits the system's ability to simulate fantasy narratives rather than simulating reality.

You won the prize Scotty, it stacks meat on your meat

meant to refer to my post do.

god dammit. I'm distracted and making shitty ,mistakes. regardless my point stands.

DnD's systems are built to simulate fantasy narratives not reality with fantasy elements. HP serves that function better than other systems would.

It does that and it refreshes you.
It's healing magic.

"You get kicked in the nuts, it hurts but it didn't kill you"

wew lad, that was difficult

To bad it leads to ridiculous bullshit like being able to rip off chunks of flesh from your own arm without so much as an injury or fall off multiple cliffs throughout the course of a day, literally sleep it off, and be a-okay after 8 hours.

If fantasy narratives operated off of D&D logic, the hero could probably decimate a town guard on his own and barely break a sweat while doing so.

Still waiting on that

lots of fantasy narratives operate like that

The most pain a human can feel short of torture? Nah it's ok, I ain't even phased
I don't know what you're reading that let's the protag go scoot free from being weakened from injury, but you should stop reading it.

you get punched in the face
the dagger pricks your arm
you slip and fall on your face
you feel sick after drinking ale that was poisoned

So it gives you tits?

>or fall off multiple cliffs throughout the course of a day
Patently false. Falling damage is the most dangerous of damages in any RPG. Gravity is the true foe.

Maybe you should read more than shitty game of thrones tier gritty fantasy

>Falling damage is the most dangerous of damages in any RPG.
Maybe when you're low level with negative CON. Once you reach Level 6 as a class with a d10 HD or higher, with 16+ CON, you have a better chance at drowning in the desert than you do at dying after falling off a cliff.

>the hero could probably decimate a town guard on his own and barely break a sweat while doing so

nigga have you ever conan? thats basically what happens. he fights and kills hundreds of people, kills invincible divine snake monsters every other day, and kills a king and takes over a nation. All the while getting stabbed and tortured and getting over it for the sake of the action and the story. Conan doesn't get sepsis because he was stabbed once and then spend the next 12 short stories bed ridden. no. he fights and kills and has fantasy adventure. DnD simulates fantasy adventure. its systems are built in service of that.

I've got a question for you. Whats the actual advantage (for the game) of simulating reality? why would that be fun or preferable to a game where you get to do fantastic incredible things that can't happen in reality? why are you playing fantasy games at all?

Meat damage, as expected
Maybe you should read more then campaign notes from reddit. I'm not talking about grit.

We're all gonna look really stupid when this thread is revealed to be an arg for the rerelease of the most realistic RPG EVAR...SYNNIBAR!!!! Every possibily scenario covered! Perfect realism!!! Coincidentally it's SHIT!

>avg 64hp at 6th level with 16 con
>fall damage is d6/10ft up to 20d6
some 150ft cliff is 15d6, with average of 4 = 60 damage
"drowning in the desert" is a bit of an overstatement, a decent cliff could easily kill you, even more so if you had already taken damage from some other source first (which is likely considering your character probably wouldn't jump off a cliff)

It's almost like those stories are the worst more boring ones in Conan anthology, Yeah I'm really wondering if Conan is going to beat these guys physically, golly gee Conan dies in like, 90% of his stories right!

why would it be advantageous for a fantasy game to better simulate reality rather than attempting to simulate fantasy narrative? Why would that make a better more fun game? why would that be fun or preferable to a game where you get to do fantastic incredible things that can't happen in reality? why are you playing fantasy games at all?

It's pretty clear at this point that you are just a sperg complaining about other people enjoying things you don't.

Again, it's not about realism. Have you read the OP? Do it again.

Answer the questions, pussy.

>2018
>not tearing off your skin
What a fag.

Man, you're just lazy-thinking in DnD you can't do something like this:

"Ok, I smash the arm of my enemy with my mace to break his bones"

(Rolls, hit)

Ok now he just lost some abstract points instead of having his arm actually broken.
What's the point? You can't even actually describe how you attack an enemy because there's no consistency in DnD combat.

"I stab my enemy in the eye" (hit 3 DMG)

Ok, you hit his eyes he blinks and shrugs it off.
So I should I bother describing anything? Better just roll the dice and play this game as it was intended not as an RPG but as a Wargame.

>"I stab my enemy in the eye"
Wrong you retarded faggot, you attempt to stab his eye, then you roll to find out what happens.
If you're attacking some little fucking mook with 1hp, and you hit with 3 damage, you stab him right through his little brain (or at least a good DM would describe it as so) as you intended.

>it's not about realism

OP is literally crying about lack of realism

He will NEVER lose his eyes, or his vision because in DnD you need dumb feats to do shit like this and actually apply penalties.
So, again.
Why.
Should
I.
Bother?

>Durr, describe the results of an attack before knowing the results of the attack
>duhhh, the results i described are diferent from the results the dice indicate
>buuhhhh, broken system
Heres how it actually works dipass

>i swing my sword at the mosnters face, trying to gouge his eyes out!
>adjusted hit roll based on small location
>lands hit, 3 damage
>your sword grazes across the monsters face, tearing a gash through the bridge of his nose. He is bleeding heavily, but the damage seems superficial.
>the monster fights on
Stop being a retard and things get easier

All I'm hearing is that your DM is shit

>He will NEVER lose his eyes
Uh, dude what? I think I just described aptly you stabbing some poor fucker in his eye.
>you need dumb feats to do shit like this
You lost me.

Are you retarded? I'm not going to answer your autistical questions about realism since they're unrelated. But I will answer
>why are you playing fantasy games at all?
To do things I can't do in real life, such as killing dragons, casting spells and culling the population. These things are already far removed from reality. Now you're telling me I also have unbreakable jelly bones and self knitting flesh? Enemies do too? Oh I actually can't die? Am I playing fantasy or am I just gambling?

>Oh I actually can't die?
you can die quite easily
if your DM is only letting you fight kobolds when you're at level 6, take it up with him

You'll keep "trying" to do shit until the thing you're killing suddenly drops dead.

You dont apply penalties based on wounds when your players use obvious tactics to fight? Youre a shit GM. Ypu shpuldnt be describing anything because you shouldn't actually be running a game.

This is not part of the DnD system, this is your homebrew.

>suddenly drops dead
If your DM isn't describing the accumulating injuries on the baddies you're beating, he's a piece of shit.

>A narrow miss! You wonder if you can dodge another.

whew, lad, that was a tough one

>are you retarded?

I dunno bro, are you? What do you actually think I'm talking about in my posts? What do I mean when I say "DnD works to simulate fantasy narrative"?

Now see, that shoulda been /thread right there, but this is Veeky Forums, and we ain't having none of that shit.

And what do you mean "modern" Dungeons and Dragons? Cure wounds has been around since Blue Book basic, and has always healed more HP than your average peasant (or first level wizard) has to lose.

There are dragons flying about, gods walking the Earth, demons rising from literal Hell, skeletons walking about without muscles, flesh, or tendons, golems of animated metal, literal wish spells... and THIS is what you choose to complain about!?

SeeName-calling because you know that there's no point describing an attack in DnD. The only things that matter are the numbers and effects.

But will a monster lose his vision without the proper talent/feat for that? No. He will just lose some points that nobody can actually see.

So why use a system that makes that difficult. And where do I draw the line? Should the enemy loses his vision at 1 or 10 hp? Why bother with hps at all? Should I let my warrior make the mage unable to cast verbal spells because the warrior cut the mage throat in a critical? Even if it just took off 1/10th of the mage HP wich focused on CON?

I mean wtf? Why not just use cause and consequence? If you actually hit the enemy eye and he's made of flesh why shouldn't the eye just be poked out? And now the enemy will make all rolls related to vision with major penalties?

He can prattle on about it all he wants, the monster is as strong on the last hit as was on the first

>there is no point giving fluff to the dice rolls

Why are you on Veeky Forums?

Of course this is what we complain about because we can't understand the complexities of a magic that can make skeletons walk but I can understande the causality of a sharp metal into human flesh.

Pretty sure called shots are in the book. Failing that, it's not that far-fetched for a DM to treat it like what happens when a PC wants to do something difficult and just increase the DC, or rather the AC in this case.

Who are you quoting?

>But will a monster lose his vision
in the example I used, the monster would be dead, but sure, you can use the blinded status
there is no "talent/feat" for stabbing a gob in the eyes
>He will just lose some points that nobody can actually see.
even if the DM decided not to apply a status to the monster, they should still be describing the physical implications of your attacks

Are you claiming you understand the complexities divine magic that mends wounds? (I don't even think the cleric knows how it works - he just prays n shit.)

...

Why wouldn't it be?
A round of fighting is supposed to be 6 seconds in-game time.
Unless you've destroyed the beast's muscles or used some sort of magic, it's not like it will become fatigued.

There's systems for that - called shot. It involves a massive penalty to hit. Ya gotta do it twice to give the target the blind penalty - which, depending on the edition, is like -4 to hit, 50% miss chance, everyone effectively invisible, etc.

It's just a game though, yeesh. Midas well ask why Gordon Freeman can't throw his crowbar. (Not that he ever would... Precious crowbar...)

Oh you mean the same as I do, except your method is shit, and your "fantasy narrative" is a transparent veil you put on top of your gambling.

>Oh you mean the same as I do

if you knew what I was talking about you could explain it. :)

When I make a skill check I can describe how I do it because I know what will happen if I suceed or not.
When I describe an attack in DnD there's no point because It doesn't matter if i aim to break his bones, the DM can't apply penalties without proper effects and if he could what would be the point of certain feats/talents?

Like I said above there's a reason to give fluff to skill/savind rolls.
There's no reason to give fluff to attacks because that would be just a foolish attempt of cinematics that don't have any real impact.

I said who you're quoting because I never said what you implied. So again, who the fuck are you quoting? Or are you having a imaginary discussion?

I said nothing about magic tha mends wounds. Read it again until you understand.

>house rules.
If people were not bound (or clinging) so much to DnD we would already have an almost-perfect rpg system.

DnD managed to make people happy to cling to mediocrity.