>come home with 6 friends in tow after an afternoon out drinking
>literally haven't eaten since breakfast all starving
>pretty drunk at this point
>throw like 6 burgers, 4 brats, a whole ring of kielbasa and like 3 steaks on the grill
>gotta check on this in a few minutes
>go grab a beer
>get pulled into a beer pong game, and then another one, then another
>one friend invited more people over
>get the music going
>basement rave commences
>so user I guess we're not doing the bbq then i can order pizza
>oh fuck no no no no no no no no
>fucking seeing double and stumbling out of the basement to get to the grill
>grab the extinguisher on the way up the stairs
>open the door to the deck
>fucking auschwitz
>stinks of burnt meat and dark smoke pluming
>open grill
>literally nothing but little ash piles in the shape of the various meats
>wasted a whole propane tank
Your Greatest Cooking Disasters
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I think that qualifies as a drinking disaster, rather than a cooking disaster.... Drinking probably compelled you to share that much food without giving it a second thought.
...
im lucky we didnt all die in a fire
Honestly this is some good ducking advice. I've destroyed a lot of food while cooking drunk. Some times you just add too much salt and sometimes you fall asleep and turn a pizza into a disc of charcoal.
Threadly reminder that there was literally nothing wrong with that pizza
Probably more of an Ambien Walrus story, but one time in college, I took a pill to go to sleep around 10, got up, and my buddies watched me make a bearnaise sauce from scratch. It took a good amount of time, they even stopped playing Halo.
When I was just about done, I microwaved a Cup O' Noodles, poured in the bearnaise, and ate it over the sink.
I remember none of this.
THAT WAS THE THIN CRUST
I burned ramen once
This. Would eat and bathe in it's grease afterwards.
Wasn't the dough still raw in the middle? I'd say that's a little bit wrong.
>be 12 years old
>decide "I'm gonna cook soup!" (I don't know how to cook)
>pour milk into pot
>put on boil
>pour in shredded taco cheese from a pack
>crack several eggs in "It'll make it more foody!"
>stir it out (but not the bottom)
>get impatient eventually
>think "It's probably done"
>whatever the fuck it was probably wasn't done
>resulting soup is slimy inedible goop with eggshells and burnt egg in it
>perfectly good pot is ruined
i think back to this sometimes.
KEK
Is it really that big an issue when you forget you're cooking while drunk?
It is if the thing you're cooking catches fire, yeah.
I guess I'm just too paranoid to leave the kitchen.
I really don't understand what Ramsay's problem was with that pizza, it looked fucking glorious to me
Even then, drunk people have a habit of falling asleep. You know, you're feeling a little groggy, you'll just sit down and keep an eye on the...zzzzzzz
/tv/ pls
>grilling with propane
You did this to yourself faggot
the dough was raw and soggy from all the oil
that is what was wrong with it.
it was supposed to be fucking thin crust
I burnt the water. Also:
>age 7
>want potato
>find little potato
>put it in microwave for 8 minutes (or was it 20 minutes?)
>kitchens smoking like a motherfucker after I come back after a while
>open microwave
>a meteorite of what used to be my potato is sitting there
>grab it
>its hot
>quick slide it out and over the counter
>catch it with my shirt
>take it outside
>go to toss it
>there's a whole in my shirt of where the potato used to be
>go back to kitchen
>it's melting a hole into the linoleum
>kick it outside
That was fun.
A whole hole in your shirt?
I'll share a recent from thanksgiving.
>making thanksgiving dinner co opt with my mom
>she wants me to make mash potatoes among other
>no problem since I make an amazing mash
>already get first indication it's not going to go well
>instead of picking up the good potatoes she said she would she picks them up at this place that regularly has bad produce
>FUCK
>have to roll with it since no place is open
>prep it and dice it perfect for the boil
>I set the pot for exactly how I want
>while I wait for it to get to the right temperature I work on my other dish
>unknown to me my mom turns the fucking heat down to low without asking me
>I come back to check them and there undercook and said heat is down to low
>WTF MOM
>"oh I thought the heat was too high for my liking"
>don't have enough time to cook it to the perfect consistency because guests are here
>work around it best I can and mash it as best I can
>can already tell it's going to be bad and I'm dying a little inside
>no one goes for seconds for my mash it turned out that bad
>mom comes up to me after the dinner
>"no offense user but your mash potatoes were really bad
>mfw
Never again
>it was supposed to be fucking thin crust
>thin crust
Thin crust sucks, that pizza is already on the thin side anyway
with a bit of luck you could even have made some killer scrambled eggs
>propane
if you're going to be dickered and grilling, work intensive grill is best grill
your mom sounds like a jealous cunt
>tfw my mom would probably pull some shit like that
aaand that's why I'm spending holidays with friends
fuck family
>he wants to taste the heat instead of the meat
She is honestly. I'm completely convinced she sabotaged my dish.
>autism
just cook the potatoes for a while longer, at most they take 8-9 minutes at a boil.
>autism
You don't really know what that word means do you?
Not with my 12 year old skillset and autism.
Also, this was still mostly milk, they'd be the runniest and loosest scrambled eggs imaginable, with shells in them.
i'm just going to go with the tl;dr version
>decided to make a 4 course dinner for my gf for her birthday.
>everythin is going well, about 1-2 hours of cooking i decide to strain my redwine sauce.
>put my sieve above the sink and start pouring it down the drain
felt pretty amazing to make sure i saved the stuff i didn't want to save and throw away the actual sauce.
oh well, i did the sauce again so no worries
My mom has tried to do the exact same thing. I stopped her halfway through
i actually managed to stop myself but was left with like 0.5dl which didn't change the situation at all