Grocery store pet peeves

mine, people who take up a whole aisle so you have to wait or go around

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=2X4c3zP6raA&t=26m20s
youtube.com/watch?v=jrwjiO1MCVs
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

mine, people who post this thread daily with the exact same shit so you have to wait for it to 404 or go around and hide the thread

When there's no self-check out.

Wal-Mart seems reluctant to do it for loss prevention reasons. Too much riff raff who'll abuse the system.

People being lazy shits and "pushing" their cart by leaning on it.
BTW, if you wanna have a laff, head to 26:20 in youtube.com/watch?v=2X4c3zP6raA&t=26m20s

>buy food at walmart because it's cheap af
>typically go around 2-3 am on my days off (work nights) also, it has the advantage of being mostly empty
>I see this walrus of a black woman, doing something that might be unprecedented
>she is so big, one motor scooter is not enough, she is seated in one and has a second to the right of it, with her gigantic right leg resting across the seat, this leg is larger than her left, it just seems to be a massive growth
>her child, who looks about 10 and resembles a starving Ethiopian is standing on the extra scooter, in between the seat and the handlebars as he can't sit down
>he is driving an entire scooter for his mom's right leg/foot, sandwiched between it and the handlebars, lurched over them to fit, occasionally using his left hand to grab her scooter handlebars to keep them aligned and controlled
>but that isn't all, her daughter who appears to be 12-13 also has an entire cart behind them, full of frozen goods, boxes of cereal, poptarts and little debbie treats, almost overflowing (keep in mind: each scooter has a basket on the front, each are full)

When you’re next in line and customer in front of you won’t end their fucking small talk with the cashier.

Must have been pay day at the food stamp office.

Wtf is this? I've got bad alcohol anxiety this morning, this pic is seriousy freaking me out.

Horse hoof without hoof. Reverse google search says the horse was dead, so rest easy.

A lot states space out the dates they hand out the EBT benefits just to keep people like this from crowding the store.

I don't know what kind of ghetto you live in, but every Walmart I've been to in the past 2-3 years has self checkout

>big thunderstorm is approaching
>store is suddenly full of people acting like they're preparing for a hurricane
>we're 3,600 ft above sea level in flyover land
>the only places that actually flood are a few parks built on floodplains and some highway underpasses
>"hey man you just never know lol!"
I guess the food is for when they're waiting for a tow truck, because as soon as the first few raindrops come down, roughly half of them forget how to drive.

>when old people decide to start checking their receipt and they flip their shit if they were charged one cent too much and hold up the entire line
>when old people think they can cut in line and get away with it
>when old people bring out their fucking coupons

thank fuck the grocery store is getting self-checkout by the end of the year because I'm at the fucking breaking point

HEB

Don't forget the checkbook.

I had this really weird old lady serve me at the supermarket today.
While she was scanning stuff she asked if I had a members rewards card so I said yes and held it out for her to grab from me and scan but she just kept scanning things while I stood there like and autist holding a hard near her. Finally she finished scanning stuff and took the card from me and scanned it. Instead of handing me the card back she put it down on this table beside her and I handed her some cash to pay for my groceries. She put the cash in the till and pulled out the change and put it with the card on the table near the card even though I was holding my hand out waiting for change. She gave me this weird look and said enjoy the rest of your day.
I had to reach over the counter and grab my member card and change, I was just confused with the entire event.

who the fuck uses check at a grocery store?

Old people.

What's even worse is that they don't even start filling out the check until they get to the cashier. They could easily fill in everything on the check except for the dollar amount while they are standing in line. That would save everyone, including themselves, time. But alas, most are too dumb to do that.

When the stores really busy with a huge lineup and only 2 tills are open.
>Leave cart full of groceries and leave

Old people need to be locked inside their habitats.

They can be annoying sometimes, that's for sure. But I'll take old people over NEETs afraid of social interaction any day.

I hate this too.
They tell you the amount and you give them the money but they're still bagging things while you're pull money out and you have to wait 15-20 seconds so they notice you've been holding the money over their keypad the whole time and they give you a weird look.

It's like they're machines.

when cashiers cant talk and work at the same time

That happens because you're too inept to notice that they are occupied with bagging and you offer the money too soon.

You should be observant. Don't hand them the money until they are ready to take it.

When cashiers talk

When there are cashiers.

I'll take a cashier over a self-checkout any day. The cashier is much faster because there is no delay on weight-checking each item.

What bothers you guys so much about cashiers anyway? Some kind of social anxiety?

I came to buy eggs and veggies, not to talk about muh weather and a hurricane.

So you're triggered by basic social interaction. Gotcha.

I used to register jockey, so I can get out faster. I fucking hate lines and chatty cashiers that want to talk amongst themselves or with the attention starved customers, I have shit to do.

It's small talk while they ring up your shit. They want you out of the line as fast as possible. Get over yourself.

Peaches in general. Fuckers have to handle each one, but manage to bruise them and break the skin. Then they attract fruit flies.

self-checkout is faster unless your autist. seriously, scan item, set on scale, pay. fast and easy.

I am an autist. I've timed it.

The normal checkout is much faster because it doesn't require a weight check. The cashier can just scan-scan-scan. When you use the self-checkout there is an extra step: scan-pause for weight check-bag-scan-pause-bag-wait.

The normal checkout doesn't have that annoying pause between every scan. And since you (or the bagger) can bag while the cashier is scanning you can overlap the bagging and the scanning steps. It's much faster.

Now if the cashiers have lines and the self-checkouts are free and clear, that's a different story. But if we ignore lines in both cases the normal checkout kicks the crap out of self checkout.

This.
We are being fucking timed, you sperg.
We also have to not fucking ignore your autistic ass because that would be "rude".
It's a balancing act.

As a courtesy clerk, (bagger and cart pusher, janitor and """returner of items""""), these are the things that make my job a bit more difficult. I will start with the obvious ones, then move the the more obscure ones.
Obvious:
>not returning carts to the cart corrals
>leaving trash in carts. (fast food bags, sample cups, drink cups, etc..
>as i am pushing carts back to store, trying to add your cart to the line that i am pushing. (i know you have good intentions, but it doesn't help)
>getting a $200+ order of groceries, but having $0 in the account
>standing over me like a hawk while i bag for you
Less obvious:
>girls leaving bloody tissues in trash that is not the mini trash next to toilet in stall
>leaving toilet paper in stalls on the floor
there are many more, but i need to walk to the liquor store not, because i am also a piece of shit.

THE BIGGEST CRIME OF ALL:
>when i am emptying trash, and as soon as i take out the plastic trash bag, they throw trash in can without the bag in it.
Please refrain from throwing your trash in the empty can for like 7 seconds until i put in the new bag! or, if you absolutely can't wait, throw it in another trash on the way out the store.

these people dont exist in my country yet

You must not be a burger, or you're one of the few burgers who don't buy weeks supply of groceries at a time. It's only faster if you have

People who bring a full cart of shit to the 10 items or less cashier.
And it's all EBT.

As a cashier I hate people like you. I tell you the amount so you'll communicate if you'll be paying cash/card/check or so you'll have time to get your bills and change together if you require a second to do so. Just standing there and passively holding out your money infuriates me. You can see I'm working on getting your items bagged or loading up your cart. The very fucking least you can do is give me a minute to finish what I'm doing.

>Be cashier in the outdoor garden area of the store.
>Customers buy plants here.
>Plants and soil, and other gardening shit.
>But there is always one.
>Who brings their cart of raw meat, veggies, and other food items.
>Over to my dirty, garden chemical covered register.
>With my dirty as fuck hands.
>And wants to check out HERE.
>And then complains to my manager because my till is not clean.
>And it's now my fault.

Plus you can print out self adhesive barcodes for coolaid packs and gum and place them on your expensive items....

>ust standing there and passively holding out your money infuriates me
I'm confused. Why'd you tell me the total if you didn't want me to pay you?

>>The very fucking least you can do is give me a minute to finish what I'm doing.
I bag my own groceries while you are scanning. That saves us both time. And even if I wasn't, what's wrong with stopping bagging, taking the money, and then going back to bagging again? It's not like stopping and starting again takes any additional time or effort.

Doesn't work.
By the time you get to the check stand the cashier has been told by loss prevention to pay special attention to you.
If the store is worth a shit.

Except then the weight doesn't match so you're fooked.

If your skills are worth a shit then LP will never have noticed.

When the girls at the tills flirt with me even though I'm pretty sure they all know I'm as gay as a daffodil
Hetero ciswomen are disgusting.

As a Grocery store employee I only talk to customers when if I feel like it or if they show interest in conversation. Otherwise fuck you, I'm gonna stay quiet. Especially if it's busy and the lines are long. I just want to scan and bag your items as fast as I can to get you the fuck out. I don't care about your day or what you're gonna do with the avocado you're buying.

I love you.
I just want to scan and bag your items. I get paid by the hour for my work, not by how well I can converse with total strangers.

Most shoplifters are dope fiends so they find it hard to have skills when they look like Golem.

People who make the same thread a week later and still post the same thumbnail they saved from google. Please go back to your imageboard for ants.

It's so while they're bagging, you get out the money. Of course, most of the time you'll get out the money faster, but this is the most time efficient way of doing things. Do NOT keep the money offered while bagging, keep it to yourself, wait till they're done, then they'll ASK for the money. It's fucking easy, dude. Don't make it weird.

>can I speak to your manager?
>can you call the manager?

>When a customer think you are the manager.

I responded to the wrong post. Whoops.

>Why'd you tell me the total if you didn't want me to pay you?
To give you time to collect your money or to tell me how you'll be paying. I want you to communicate with me because that's how social interactions usually play out.

>I bag my own groceries while you are scanning. That saves us both time.
Honestly, if you're doing this as a customer you can slap me, spit in my face, or passively hold out money towards me. Thank you for being considerate.

>And even if I wasn't, what's wrong with stopping bagging, taking the money
You don't understand because you're not a shit customer that stares daggers at me with their arms folded while I scan and bag their shit. Those customers are usually the ones to get upset if you don't have everything ready as soon as you receive their order. So if they're just standing there, passively holding their money out, while I'm working my ass off for them, I get triggered.

the normal checkout has a scale built into the scanner, moron. There is a weight check. You just have shitty self scan machines near you that are slow as fuck.

>official hurricane warning issued
>news anchors blast out triple cherry nigger alerts for ratings
>everyone runs out and buys a month's worth of food
>at the end of twenty-four hours there's nothing left
>they try to return all their spoiled food after the category-1 hurricane passes over

I fucking hated working at Wal-mart.

Those scales are for produce you idiot.

Not just loss prevention. If your department is near the entrance/ exit (in my case, produce), we were taught to spot go-carts (carts loaded with cheap, innocuous items on the outside, and stuffed with steaks, beer, diapers, baby formula, etc. in the middle, left unattended near the doors), as well as suspiciously-acting people.

Not that we gave much of a shit. We might back up a manager when he follows you out, but in general the old-schoolers aren't risking a bullet or a stab wound over the store's loss. We'll get on the walkie-talkies, but that's about it.

When I worked wine & spirits, I had a department leader straight tell me people could walk in there, grab a bottle, and look him in the eyes while they walked out. He'd say, "don't do it.", then immediately call a manager and log the incident, time and description so management could dick around going through security footage.

Hate to break it to ya' management, but taking a bullet or a stab wound will cost me a helluva lot more than the $10.25/ hr you're paying me.

On the other hand, we will occasionally follow you to your car, memorize or write down the license plate, make, model, and description, then report it to the cops. So, petty thieves, if it seems like a safe bet, I hope you like getting pulled over days or weeks later and arrested for petty theft.

I always used to do this.
Whenever someone would ask for a manager I would just be like "I am the manager".
90% of the time they would shut up and leave.
Nobody likes talking to a twenty something manager.

(cont.) if you're curious about the go-carts, the steaks and beer are obviously high-priced luxury items. The diapers and baby formula are practically as good as cash on the crack whore market, or get resold on ebay/ craigslist.

Eh, it's more of a game of spooking the fuck out of the twitchy ones in the store and watching them ditch that cell phone charger.

>try to return spoiled food
>stocking up on perishables in preparation of a hurricane

I don't want to believe it but I do.

The LP in my store would pay us if we recover one of those carts and they have enough in them.
Made an extra 40 bucks because some druggy got spooked and was trying to cover up their cart of makeup with a $300 jacket.

Gotta admit, it's fun seeing them bale on the cart and yell excuses and apologies while peeling out of the parking lot.

One of my favorites was this fat crack whore that tried to run with a cart. Me, a manager, and one of the meat department guys is running after her when some total random dude in the parking just fucking body-checks the cart into a curb. Bitch takes off while we get the cart back together. On the way into the store rando is walking with us, and he says, "some motherfucker broke into my shed last week and stole my tools! I FUCKING HATE THIEVES!" Manager offered to comp him $50 work of groceries, but he was just coming in for a few bucks worth of items. Cool fucking guy.

>last jenkins no longer fit for service on the publix board of directors
>greedy jews get rid of employee bonuses
>slash other benefits
>give themselves pay raises

and we now most of us no longer give a single fuck if you shoplift

>When they don't believe you are a manager

>last jenkins no longer fit for service on the publix board of directors
>now that none of George Jenkins' kids are in publix anymore the board can do whatever the fuck they want
>greedy jews get rid of employee bonuses
>slash other benefits
>give themselves pay raises

and we now most of us no longer give a single fuck if you shoplift

Some liquor stores will do that with fake IDs. A buddy of mine worked in one that gave a $25 bounty on every fake ID turned in. He'd grab your ID, look at you and say, "you're not getting shit. If you want the ID back, give me $20 cash right now. Otherwise I get $25 on payday." He was a glorious asshole about those, it was awesome.

The scales weight the items on one side verses the items on the other side to "see" if you scanned everything. (The system doesn't know that the Clorox bleach is now 15% more free!) dingus...

Well fuck, there goes Florida's best grocery chain...

>not returning carts to the cart corrals
Fuck those people so hard. I work at a Trader Joe's and we don't have corrals. So people just leave their carts near where they parked. I have to coordinate in my head the most efficient way to collect their damn carts.

>leaving trash in carts. (fast food bags, sample cups, drink cups, etc..
If I'm a cashier and see trash in the cart I throw it away but not before making a face and feigning disgust. I hope it inspires some customers to throw their trash away.

>standing over me like a hawk while i bag for you
Fuck those customers. If they wanted it packed a certain way they should do it themselves.

No. It compares the weight of the product on the scale with the weight in the computer recorded for that item. It's designed specifically to thwart what you are discussing.

If you put a kool-aid barcode on a heavier product it will reject it.

>15% more free
That's a different SKU. It has a different weight in the computer.

Of course there is some leeway programmed into the system otherwise there would be a lot of false positives. So you could get away with something that's similar in weight. Or if there is a lazy attendant who overrides everything without checking. But if you stick a bar code from a product with a radically different weight on a different product then you're likely to get caught by the scale.

>be working security at a warehouse
>batshit angry lady keeps calling
>the department she is trying to get a hold of is swamped, has a bunch of calls on hold
>she never waits on hold, just keeps calling back
>I tell her each time that there are multiple calls on the line ahead of her
>she then goes off on my accuses me of lying, says that I'm doing this to spite her
>thank her for giving me the idea of keeping her on hold to mess with her, I'll consider doing it in the future
>hang up and wait
>she calls back
>answer using a different voice
>she's livid, blowing up, asking to speak to the manager
>"I am the manager, that's unacceptable. Please hold while I deal with this."
>put her on hold for 20 minutes

you're my hero

When management has you do work way below your pay scale.

>Get told to repair shopping carts/clean out hair from in the wheels.
>Decide fuck it, nothing else to do, beyond work the floor like I am supposed to.
>Be outside in the summer heat taking wheels of carts for hours when the head manager pops out to smoke and sees me.
>Asks me what i'm doing out here doing parcel work.
>Tell him that the 4th in charge manager has me doing this.
>Asks me how long I have been at it.
>Point at the line of 20 carts finished, and the 40 waiting to get fixed.
>He finishes his smoke, tells me to put the carts away and gets on the phone.
>Calmly asks someone on the other end of the phone why he is paying someone nearly $20/hr to fix carts when they are needed in the store that is currently swamped with customers because of a huge furniture sale.
>Other manager pops out the door, and from the look on his face, was not expecting his boss to be outside waiting for him.
I always hated that weasel of a manager.

tfw management has you trying to do work way above your pay scale too

I never understood the point of self-checkout machines. Well, I understand why stores have them, but for the customes, there is no way in hell it's faster than using a register. They're always slow and finnicky, you need to put shit in bags while scanning, weighing stuff and whatnot.. whenever I see someone use one of those it always looks like it takes forever.
There is one form of self-checkout though that's vastly superior to both regular SCO and registers; the one where you get a handheld scanner when you enter the store and scan them while putting them in a shopping bag as you stroll through the store. Fuck they're easy to use and takes no time either. When you're done shopping you just put the scanner in a station and pay in the machine. Why would you ever use the old system when you can be out of the door so much easier?

I work at a big box retailer, not a grocery store, but they just put in two banks of four self-checkouts a couple months ago.
It's a lot faster (or at least feels a lot faster) for the people only grabbing maybe a handbasket full of things or less, because they don't have to wait in line behind someone with an overflowing cartful of stuff or obnoxious couponers hwo pick a fight every time the misread a coupon.

I suspect the main reason, though, is cost-cutting.
Sure, the eight self-checkouts might cost 25 grand a piece (number pulled out of my ass, but i would believe it), but with one cashier watching four self-checkouts at a time that's two employees for eight registers, as opposed to eight employees for eight registers.
The machines may be expensive but they'll pay for themselves in payroll hours saved in a year.

Some customers like them. If you have a customer with social anxiety who can't stand to talk to another person these things are like gold.

You're describing a problem with lines, not an advantage with machines. If you compare a self-checkout with a cashier, both having no line, then cashier is faster.

what's so hard about scanning and bagging at a self-checkout? it's really for someone with 10 or less items who wants to avoid a long line. except for the fucking idiots who bring well over the limit of items to one.

There's nothing hard about it. But it frustrates me because it is so slow compared to a cashier. That pause while the machine checks the weight of the item is infuriating. I also hate that annoying electronic voice that tells me what to do next. Bitch, I'm not an idiot, I can read the screen and know what to do well before your stupid computer voice has even started telling me.

I do use them but only if there are lines at all the cashiers and the self checkouts are free--and that's pretty rare. Usually if there are lines at all the cashiers there are lines at the self checkout too. And those can be awful if some idiot can't work the machine properly.

I'm saying it's generally just unweildy and doesn't seem to be much faster. The handhold scanners seem so much better it's ridiculous by the way.

note: generally you never have more than 4 people a line here.

there's not really any advantage to the consumer.
the company has the advantage of it being not really any worse than a normal register, while allowing one person to handle multiple registers.

>self checkout
>select bananas on the self-checkout screen or whatever bullshit
>usually $0.49/lb in my town
>weigh your random shit that isn't actually bananas, making sure not to accidentally scan a bar code in the process

I've saved literally some amount of money doing this.

>go-carts (carts loaded with cheap, innocuous items on the outside, and stuffed with steaks, beer, diapers, baby formula, etc. in the middle, left unattended near the doors)
I don't get it, what's the plan?

Shop lifters. I've been working at this grocery store for three years and some of them are thrifty. I was "impressed" by one of them but I've never mentioned it on Veeky Forums because I don't want to give faggots any ideas.

when someone enters the store their plan is to exit through the entrance with the cart while the gates are open. Generally the cashiers are more focused on catching someone trying to walk past the lines to the exit than keeping an eye on the entrance.

They put cheap stuff at the top of the cart so staff are less likely to be suspicious while hiding the expensive stuff under it. People generally don't have giant carts in the "start" of the store, and if there's a bunch of tenderloins and booze and other expensive stuff found much further inside the store it's a pretty big tell something fishy is going on.

youtube.com/watch?v=jrwjiO1MCVs

Which is why I never use them, Jews killing jobs, albeit shit jobs.

Nice quads, I guess just can't picture the layout and don't understand how they manage to get the cart near the door without somebody thinking they're about to run out with it anyways. My grocery stores can only get to the exit through the cashiers.

E L D E R Y G E N O C I D E

Well how do people enter the store? Through a couple of gates, I assume. They wait by the gates on the inside with their cart, and when someone enters and it's open, they walk right out.

Isn't a person with an unpaid load of grocery heading toward the door suspicious as it is? How does getting another guy to carry it out any less suspicious than just out right walking out?
Is there something missing or am I that much of a shoplifting brainlet

Be 57 years old with a gray beard and get carded for beer. Fuck that shit.

>customers move fridge items out of the fridge and leave them around the store
>same with kids and candy because their parents won't get it for them
>recently found firelighters in the fucking freezer

When people who have no business using self-checkout machines try using self-checkout machines.

I've witnessed an old guy smooshing a bag of milk against the screen thinking that's how scanning is done.

I've seen some distracted lady grind the banknote slot jammed because she didn't notice her shopping list was stuck to the note she was inserting.

I've seen an idiot mother seat her toddler on the bag scale and wonder why the machine was complaining.

No wonder approximately a third of the self-checkouts at my favorite supermarket are out of order at any day of the week.

Who's supposed to be suspicious? Other customers don't care, cashiers are busy dealing with irritating old people and drunks that are right in front of them rather than checking over the should over what happens at the entrance gates.
>How does getting another guy to carry it out any less suspicious than just out right walking out
you wot? Who's this magical "other person" now?

Here, lemme show you a picture.

I thought there were two people involved, my bad.
If the person can leave the cart by the entrance unnoticed, why not just walkout with the items in the first place?

Because the idea is to meld into the other customers who are exiting through the registers and not cause a ruckus. If you walk straight out with 20 pounds of steak in your arms even half-dead blind boomers will notice and start shouting,

i've done this so many times