Grocery store pet peeves

smelly non-white people
goddamn sikhs and indians need to take a shower before they go out

i was a cashier for a couple summers in highschool and i've got a few gripes on the working side:

>using too many of those semi-opaque produce bags on your vegetables, making it impossible to read the codes
>getting mad when i touch your stuff
>being really specific about how you want your groceries bagged but still wanting me to do it
>giving me a hard time when i don't recognize the produce, ask if it's one of two similar-looking things (cilantro/italian parsley)
>making me go and find the code for the item from the bakery/bulk when it was your job
>asking for a refund on a 50cent piece of produce that YOU picked out

the best one:
>not having enough money and asking me to cover the difference

>>Customers who call me by name. (It's just weird.)
fuck thats a good one. one time i called the person 'customer' as a joke and they were not stoked. then another time some half-drunk girl did it and i called her 'cute girl' and she WAS stoked.

on the customer side
>when people stand in front of shit and act indignant when you say something
>not having enough cashes open
>the self-checkout supervisor running around (although i can see that being a really shit job, but it's still frustrating to sit there for 3 minutes when you accidently lean on the weighted bagging area

>just 'tap'
>doesn't matter if your grocery store supports it
>just tap bros
>why aren't people just tapping?

they do have it enabled. i used it out of reflex, it went through, and the cashier was like 'what? you can do that?'

you stupid cunt other countries don;t have the same payment system

i understand that not every country has the same system, but based on my (limited) experience, america does have the same system, but no one there uses it.

>person brings me a 2 inch steak to cook on grill
>mfw 'well done and i need it in 10 minutes'

>People with WIC checks or food stamps that get nothing on the approved list

Every time I go to HEB they have people with downs bagging groceries. I understand people don't want to have their retards chained to them 24-7 but this facade that they are capable of contributing to society needs to fucking leave. They make me uncomfortable and are a pain to deal with.

i haven't seen it here, except for Whole Foods

same at Safeway, the downies are always causing a scene and disrupting the flow but no one ever complains.

they dont really care about them contributing to society, they get mad right offs for employing tards m8

i saw a guy use apple pay when i was manning the register at my whole shits and it blew my tiny retarded mind
i got android pay and shit is so fun

Aw shit that's disgusting. Damn it we need more abortion rights.

righties will never allow it for us common folk bud
at least we can find out if our kids are gonna be downies, unless they get rid of our ability for checking that shit too

>>"Gawkers" (Customers who watch you bag without putting their stuff into the cart.)
I usually help, but it's kinda dumb to expect them to do anything, it is your job after all.

Customers who wait until the entire transaction is done, have the receipt in hand, and then go "Oh, I have some coupons I forgot to use, can I hold up your line for ten minutes?"

There's a tard who works at a local grocery chain here and he's actually a cool guy. He's definitely retarded but he makes little jokes and is quick at bagging groceries. They're not ALWAYS terrible workers.

>murder is okay
What if my kid gets cancer and I don't wanna take care of him anymore. Can I just shoot him?

As a customer, I've never seen this happen from any customer in front of me. It's rare. Deal with it.

>They're not ALWAYS terrible workers.
but they are mostly terrible

>expelling a mass of cells with no central nervous system or functioning brain is "murder" and equitable to killing a sapient human being

Why are you outside your retard containment board?

Sperm is more alive than the bean that is aborted. It's self aware. Has purpose. It can smell.

Bit of a faulty analogy, cancer is treatable, and if not then the kid dies anyway. Meanwhile, Downs syndrome is permanent and the one having it is forever dependant on others.

It depends on the store and the setup.
I scan and bag and the customer is expected to take the bags from the carousel and put them into their cart. Most stores still use a 2 person setup with a dedicated bagger but mine does not.

how are customer supposed to know the minute bagging etiquette differences from store to store?

I have a couple HEB's around me but the closest and most convenient one has a bunch of lazy fucking morons working there. Not a single one of which looks a day over 18 of course.
You cannot buy any frozen meat/produce/ice cream at my local one because the employees are all so slow that everything thaws and refreezes by the time they re-stock.
It's very noticeable and I've actually considered contacting someone about it.

fuck off wagey

it's pretty obvious unless you're fucking autistic

Thats even better you idiot.

>cash machine doesn't support taping
>tap
>thank you for shopping here
>quickly leave
>enjoy your free groceries

>see thirsty qt3.14 soccer mom buying some cucumbers
>wont get to watch what she will do with them when she gets home
it tears me up inside every time

Just a salad, m8

>thinks that would actually work anywhere ever
>calls other people an idiot

eh sometimes the kid is just too far gone

>shop at costco
>people tasting free samples at ends of aisles *blocks your path* because they can't be assed to park their carts a few feet away
>same people tasting AND conversing while continuing to block your path after they have inhaled said samples
>people strolling through like it's a park and occupying two lanes in aisles
I don't even mind the kids anymore

...

*blocks your path*

>grocery jesters

almost as bad as the mayo goblins

Reminds me of a story
>shopping at Kroger's one day, minding my own fucking business
>hear something fly off of the shelf behind me
>"Fuck, not today..."
>I turn my head to look at it and my face gets covered in mayo
>like how the clowns throw pie at people but with mayo
>hear footsteps running away

Still not the worst thing the jester has done, I got off lucky

I don't think this issue happens as often because grocery stores have updated the machines to be more efficient:
I used to hate it when I got done scanning and bagging an entire basket only for the customer to pull out one of those manufacturer coupons where you'd have to write-in the price of the product to get it free. And usually they'd do this on purpose to try to stiff the cashiers.
The stipulation was that they'd have to buy two products to get the third free, and they'd hope you would just not notice/get irritated looking and give them the free product regardless if they followed the rules.
The machine I cashiered on at the time was so old (I worked at the store in 2009 and these registers were from the late 90s) that I would have to manually scroll up and then determine what item gibberish the product was and guess the price. Or go through all the bags looking for the stupid products. If I had to tell them they didn't buy the right products and I couldn't honor the coupon, they'd start hollering at my ass until a manager came over. They'd get pissy if they tried to get an expensive product free (these coupons had money caps) and I had to tell them no.

It's not hard to give the coupons to the cashier first so they can be aware of what they're looking for, unless you're trying to be a rip off. It still peeves me if I'm behind one of these damn couponers in line and they start being fussy.

>take all my stuff with no issue
>got to the counter
>''Sir, do you have Faggot™ Card???? :DDDD''
>no, I don't
>''Would you like to create a Faggot™ Card right now???? :DDDDDD''
>no, I don't
>''Fugg, sir, it will take only a minute :DDDDD''
Fuck these stupid stores and their retarded cards.

I remember when I was a cashier I didn't give a fuck and just overrode every coupon to work unless it was incredibly obvious it wasn't correct.

Never got any shit for it from management either haha

For some stores you don't get the sale price unless you have the faggot card so it's worth getting one

The machine I worked on was so old that in order to override I had to blink my register light and wait for a customer care manager to come over with the damn override key.
If I had the power to override at the time, I would have for the majority. Though I admit some people were so nasty I didn't mind holding them up for the extra five minutes.

That's what they say, but I didn't want to make the post too long.
Fuck this shit and fuck your cards, faggot.
If I wanted to save money I would simply eat less.
These stores wouldn't be creating these cards if they were losing money for them. They have them because somehow they have figured that it makes more money for them.
I want nothing to do with this retarded jewish consumer manipulation. I just want to buy what I want with the price tag that is shown and move on.

>They have them because somehow they have figured that it makes more money for them.

It's not "somehow" user, this is well known: When you get a card they give you a discount in exchange for being able to track your purchasing habits. That's what the card is for--it is used to track what you buy, which can't be done if you pay cash for obvious reasons, or with a credit card due to banking privacy laws. The card is an entry in their database that tracks what you buy. That data is what the stores use to figure out what items to stock and which to discontinue.

Not only for tracking but I think people misunderstand how the sales and coupons work

The way the sales and coupons work is that it's all recorded and the store reports the sales from sale items to the suppliers and then they are reimbursed by the suppliers.

In other words, everybody wins in this situation. Plus, paying their full retail or not getting something in return for paying full price is fucking asinine.

It's also simple psychology. If people believe they are getting more discounts at a particular store and have a card, they will more likely be repeat customers.
Also when they fill out the address and email info, circulars and ads are sent to them from that store.

It's not just psycological though. They literally ARE getting a discount. People are basically exchanging their purchasing history with the store in exchange for lower prices.

I am not even remotely interested into figuring out how these card benefit these companies. You just know that they do and that's it. Don't ever make these cards, never use them.
I have many theories to explain how they benefit them, and it really doesn't matter, you just don't want these fucking cards. Same reason why you avoid anything that is priced XX.99$

The best way I can try and explain this is that just because it benefits the store doesn't mean it screws you over. Thanks to their rewards I've never payed full price for gas in the last three years

When i worked at a grocery store we had a couple of them from a program, really nice people, sad they have the condition they did, i didn't mind them, better then most of the customers

this is not your blog. if you can't even remotely stay on topic, fuck off

As a guy who worked in a grocery store for 6 years, literally most things customers do are pet peeves. Here are some off the top of my head.
>Walk up to me and just ask a question like I'm google "Where's the X/Y/Z". At least say "hello".
>Being adamant that your pronunciation of a product is correct when I repeat what you said but as it's supposed to be said. Merlot is not pronounced "Mair-laht". Deal with it.
>Interrupting me helping another customer to ask for help. Wait your fucking turn you aren't more important than anyone else.
>Talking to another person in an extremely inconvenient location for everybody else (women are the worse offenders here) such as taking up an aisle or an entire popular display
>Breaking something and not notifying anyone and just walking away like you never did it. We know.
>Complaining about prices. I don't set them and I can't change them. The orderer sets the prices based on what price he can get on a good. Profit margins are very slim. This has to be one of the top 5 pet peeves.
>If it's 8PM and there's about 5 people in the store, feel free to start a monologue about your life. If we're busy, go away.
>Ask for something, I tell you we "unfortunately don't have it right now, I'm sorry", and then ask if we have any in the back. If the shelf is empty and I just TOLD YOU WE DON'T HAVE IT, then we don't have it.
>If we're out of a really common product of a specific brand, such as wanting Coors Light, and then complain. Just buy Bud Light or Miller Lite or literally any other light beer they all taste like watered down piss.
>Asking for an piece of food to be reduced just because it has one surface spot on it. Just pick another piece of fruit.
>Coming in at closing time and then shopping like normal. There's literally no way you couldn't have come in any time between opening and closing to shop? We want to go home and it's 20 minutes past close. Hurry up.
>Indians. Ask about 100 questions, then don't even buy anything

Which is why I said "also" and not "just psychological." Sheesh.

Fuck off nigger, Downies are typically way nicer than normal people plus they're about as happy as can be. You should have been aborted for being such an asshole.

>he thought it was mayo

You need some training in customer service it seems.
>pronunciation
Who gives a shit if you understood what they wanted
>out of a common product
That's a legitimate complaint for a grocery store seeing as that is your only purpose, selling common goods. Would you prefer they raise a bitch fit and ask for the manager instead of just passing along their concern to you?
Might wanna get some control over your emotions at some point.

>store cards
Am I the only one who just enters his old phone number from 10 years ago on the keypad or just makes one up? For my whole life it's only not worked a few times, and in those cases the cashiers entered a phone number for me.

You're the customer that asks for the mehir-lot that's sold out, then demands to see the warehouse because they are obviously hoarding it for themselves.

I made one up a few times, and then one time I accidentally entered a real number and the guy was like "can you confirm your email" and I was like "oh it's just firstname/lastname at gmail" and he was "it says here we have yahoo, should I change it" and I made him change it and probably someone lost like a billion reward points

So now I just pay the normal price

>they all taste like watered down piss.
why do you know what piss tastes like tho...

Blow me. I've never gotten a complaint for bad customer service because I'm always cheerful and helpful to customers, and bend the fuck over backwards for good customers who treat me like I'm another human being instead of a toy at their disposal.

You are one of those assholes you just don't realize it.

Unemployed Hambeasts with 5 kids and two baskets full of frozen tv dinners, soda, and Little Debby snack boxes.

>Indians. Ask about 100 questions, then don't even buy anything

Man what is it about Indians that make them so much worse than any other people?
I think the only people who might be worse are the drunk/high people and even then that's only on occasion.

because he's drank American light beer

Huh. I wonder why I've always gotten away with it? Luck? Am I particularly gifted at pretending to be a technologically retarded middle-aged guy? I have been challenged similarly before, and said something like: "Wait, what? no that's not the right address! Change it? But I had had it all set up! Why does this shit never work?"

"Sorry, Sir. Let me just enter my number this time."

Besides, I think the store card price is the normal price. It's just a stupid-ass little jig they all make you dance now.

"Oh. Ok, thank you."

>store cards, continued
And this is for Faggot Card™ :DDDD guy
I don't think that the grocery stores are directly responsible for this, but those fucking things are a public safety menace. Every other woman in the modern world has 5-20 different key fob cards on her car keys, making them fucking ridiculous, awkward 1990's Koosh ball masses. Have you ever borrowed a chick's car keys? Holy shit, half the time you lift your foot up to brake the plastic key fobs hit your knee, stopping you from reacting quickly. I have no doubt a good many people have been rear ended because of those fucking things, driving up everybody's premiums.

but how'd he know that's what piss tastes like...

The same way we all know you're a homosexual. It's inferred.

Most of the points that user listed and being miffed about them have nothing to do with good customer service. "The customer is king/is always right" gets thrown around a lot. But is fundamentally flawed.
The correct saying should be "The customer is also just a person trying to get through their day as best as possible." And that goes both ways. No side has should need to take shit from the other, if everyone acts with some basic decency.

Have you never tasted your own urine as a child? Or thought it through after smelling it, since sense of taste and smell are closely linked?

When I was in daycare I would take sips of the toilet water when people had forgotten to flush

Maybe that is what gives people the "superpower" of becoming a tripfag.

At least a good hypothesis to work with.

when they have literally 8 regular checkout lanes and 4 self checkouts and 2 express lanes and only one cashier for the regular checkout and everything except self is closed on a fucking weekend.

Avoiding minorities and old people is impossible in a grocery store so that would have to be #1

No, I teach customer service classes for tech companies for proper handling of customer needs.
>never got a complaint
Almost can guarantee this is due to a lack of surveys not because of your great customer service. Good customer service comes from pragmatic people. You are emotionally driven person. I deal with clients who have literally 20 to 30 surveys a month for each individual employee.
The customers always right has nothing to do with them actually being right. It has everything to do with being empathetic to the customer's situation.

>>Walk up to me and just ask a question like I'm google "Where's the X/Y/Z". At least say "hello".
I usually just say "Excuse me" and ask where can I find the item. What do you expect after Hello? How are you doing today? A hearty handshake? Do they need to say Goodbye and use your pronouns too so you don't triggered?

I have grocery store anxiety and it fucking sucks. I feel like all the old people are judging me for filling my basket with frozen food and beer instead of vegetables and shit, even though they probably can't even see well enough to know what I'm buying, let alone care about it. I bet it would be worse if I were fat, since then it wouldn't even be a stretch to believe that some people would negatively judge my choices. As it is, I know I have personally judged people who show up at the checkout with nothing but fourteen frozen pizzas, diet pepsi, and tons of cat food.

It would be easy to pass this off as random autistic ranting...

Except I had the same argument with my wife this weekend.

Fucking keychain whacking me in the leg and lanyard from the rear view swinging all over the place every time I turn.

Women.

I don't like when they move the milk section.

People that don't know how to properly form a line. Some wimpy cunt will stand 6 feet away from the next person in the queue. Drives me up the wall.

My local grocery store, Safeway, just dismantled their self-scan station which I am saddened by. I guess they thought every single person wants that human face-to-face contact on every purchase? False. Much quicker to do it myself.

more like they couldn't keep up with all the shoplifters taking 20 pounds of steaks and ringing them up as bananas

>When people ask where something is at, when all they need to do is look to the left or right.
People need to look with their eyes not their mouth.

I enter my dad's 35 year old business line that we haven't used in like 15 years. Cards are retarded I just enter than number and then tap my phone to pay.

Why are kroger jesters the worst?
>be me, shopping
>comparing ingedient lists of two items
>hear clanging of my cart
>oh no, not again
>the grocery jester installed 15" tires on my cart with matching spinner rims
>cart is now too tall for me as a manlet to take stuff out
>have to push the cart like a toddler to the service desk to get my food taken out
>management just laughs at me and gets me one of those 'future customer' children's carts
I was so embarassed i had to go cry in the bathroom for 20 minutes

I hate the greeters at walmart.
one time I was stoned to the bone and the old guy was about to say hi to me with a big smile, then he noticed I was high and he put his head down acting like a jackass. if I ever walk past him these days and he says hi. I flick him off telling him to "fuck off oldster"

another pet peeve is when stores don't carry specific brands that I want. like faygo soda, or certain cheese curls I like. I don't want to go to another store to finish my shopping

Faggots who buy six pudding cups.

People who hold up the express lane for five minutes haggling over sale prices only to find out that they have the wrong item or the sale ended yesterday deserve to get hung by their toes and beaten to death