ITT: good keto meals

I've been on low carb for the majority of 3 years and I've learned you never trust a fart

For breakfast, just half an hour ago, I pan-fried some deli-sliced smoked turkey, dumped into a bowl, and poured some spicy mustard on top. Not into keto, was just the last of my food besides pizza which I'm sick of.

>whole wheat
nope, never works for wraps. Shitters always rip open.

Just posted in another thread but had a bacon egg cheese and green onion frittata for breakfast with 1/2 avocado a glass of almond milk

Also Making ribs for the first time in the oven since it's a frozen wasteland outside. Will be my meat for the next few days. Will Have spinach salad and zucchini fried in almond flour as sides.

Dinner last night was tilapia stuffed with crab and a very small amount of panko, lemon butter for dipping, cauliflower gratin, and roasted brussel sprouts with olive oil and salt.

If you got money to waste go get burrito bowls.

Some Keto bread recipes are really good. I made some mini muffins out of coconut flour once that were amazing

does this shit actually work?

Recipe?

Sure. It's a paleo recipe but I tweaked it a bit to make it work for me.

1/4 cup coconut flour
1/4 cup coconut oil, melted ( can use butter or lard as substitute but might change nutritional value)
2 eggs, room temp
1 Tbs unsweetened applesauce
1 Tbs raw honey
1/4 tsp baking soda
1 tsp Apple cider vinegar

Preheat oven to 350. Spray mini muffin pan with oil. Mix together flour and oil till smooth. Add eggs, mix. Add remaining ingredients. Divide batter between the muffin pan and bake about 20 min, until a toothpick comes out clean and tops spring back when pressed. Serve with butter. If your not doing Keto these are really good topped with honey too.

Single recipe makes 8 mini muffins. Doubles well.

8.7 fat
4.4 carbs
1.3 fiber
2.1 protein
2.6 sugar

To make these even lower carb you can substitute the honey with a packet or 2 of stevia or Splenda. It will change the taste. The muffins ( followed from above recipe) are good for a cornbread substitute and also good with a drop or 2 of banana flavoring and a few nuts. If your really craving bread then these will hit the spot. Just know that it's really easy to eat more than 1 or 2.

I don't know about epilepsy but according to this article keto won't hurt the gallbladder, and may even help prevent stones.

ketosister.com/keto-and-the-gallbladder/

There is a coconut taste just FYI. It's mild but still noticeable. If you like coconut you will probably like these. I imagine you could tweak this recipe to use almond flour and butter instead of the coconut but I've never tried it.

Yes it works but you still need to eat at a calorie deficit though. If you just eat unlimited amounts of foods, even low carb, it won't work.

>8.3 grams of net carbs per muffin

Listen up you fat retard. I'm sure they're actually pretty tasty but there is nothing keto about this. Keep eating shit like this while telling yourself it's keto and you will FAIL at reaching your goals. How about just not eating fucking bread.

Sorry in advance for you having to work at things.

It's 4.4 carbs per muffin with 1.3 fiber. Total of 3.1 net gm carbs per muffin. Learn to read

>All these limes and lemons in here

Your post number is binary for 151. If that number means anything to you then maybe you have an answer.

>sugar isn't carbs
>muh fiber subtracts

Go be fat somewhere else you fucking stooge. You're not cut out for this.

Been eating keto for over a year now with no ill side effects. Feels great. I haven't been doing it for weight loss, just doing it because I fucking hate the way my body feels when I eat tons of carbs.
Average meals
Breakfast: Bacon, mushroom leek omelet, coffee w heavy cream
Lunch: Steak & guac tacos on low carb tortilla
Dinner: Duck confit w salad lyonnaise

I have come up with my own perfect sugar substitute to make desserts. In any recipe that calls for sugar, just 1:1 replace with Allulose and then a squirt or two of liquid sucralose. Works perfect in your average cheesecake recipe. It tastes exactly like a regular cheesecake. Almond flour / butter crust instead of graham cracker crust.
That substitution also works with amazing results in ice cream, caramel, and creme brulee or any other custard recipes.

A list of some things I've eaten over the past few days, I have 25 lbs to lose. These all have some count of carbs, you just need to do your homework
Foods:
Hamburger with mozzarella and pepperoni slices
Spinach salad with mexican cheese and ranch
Fried tofu with salt and pepper
Tofu with soy sauce
Hardboiled egg with soy sauce
Baked chicken with sriracha on the side
Green bean casserole with no fried onion
Hotdog meats with ketchup
Broccoli with Velveeta , I'll probably do cheddar next time
Treats:
2 Russel stouffers sugar free chocolate-no diarrhea experiences with these yet
Sugar free gummy bears from the dollar store-i fucked up
Zevia sodas
Sugar free drink mixes from dollar store like jolly rancher green apple
Small bag of hot cheetos

Sorry your life is so miserable that you have to argue with people over optional sugar grams. Thanks for fucking up my good vibe Keto thread you rude faggot.

Try heating the tortillas in the microwave first

instead of the tortillas, I like to use romaine leaves as a wrap in my fajitas and tacos, less carbs and they are healthier.

Just eat dark chocolate. The longer you go without sugar or artificial sweeteners, the sweeter everything tastes. Don't drink sweetened diet sodas or diarrhea gummy bears. That shit's the fucked up, twisted version of healthy eating from the modern default perspective of a sugar addict.

really keto isn't healthy
there's a reason diabetics are serious about their insulin

fat head pizza
shit's good

What are you talking about, doofus? I'm a type 1 who's been on a ketogenic diet for years. I might be dead by now otherwise. I still take insulin, but considerably less. I have an athletic A1c now.

was talking about the 90% with type 2 goofball

keto goodness here

Uh oh, someone's not updates on their reading
>tl;dr low fat diets advocated since the 70s have had no impact in deaths from heart disease.

There is a follow up article about how people with diets that included fats (even saturated) had little to no heart disease.

>tfw fell for the sweet jew

Seitan, simmered in beef broth and fried in bacon grease

Anyone else finding they just barely eat at all on keto. I was on it with weekly cheats that got out of hand for about 6 months. Went totally off it for a week, and felt like garbage. After recommitting fully, I'm finding all I really eat is butter coffee in the morning, then around mid day or the evening a big plate of bacon and eggs and spinach. Then the rest of the day its just some string cheese, almonds, or little snacks.

Admittedly, my lifts have gone down, but I've dropped about 15 pounds in two weeks...still feel fine in general.

pronounced "satan"?

That's the most fun way to pronounce it

yes, I've been on keto since t-day weekend
hardly any appetite at all
i feel full when i wake, at about 2 i eat a snack
then a small dinner
it's fucking weird

have you noticed a big decline in athletic ability? Imy lifts across the board are down, which i suspect is simply a matter of my general calorie intake being drastically reduced or missin on the quick release carb energy

i don't lift
if you lift, you can still take in some carbs for some energy boosts, either before or after...no big deal

my objective was to drop some weight FAST, will adjust after that goal is reached but yeah. holy shit did going full keto for a couple weeks work.

or, you can not eat carbs and try to force yourself to up you fat cals.
if you are not eating and you lower your cals, your metabolizim will lower, and then your energy will lower

this

>my lifts have gone down, but I've dropped about 15 pounds
Could you have lost some muscle mass?

absolutely. and a big percentage is water weight im sure, i guess the muscle sparing qualities of keto only go so far

Keto isn't good. it's not a long term solution either regardless of what people think.

I would eat in order:
Protein Shake
Eggs
tuna, broccoli and spinach
steak
Workout
More whey post-workout
Chicken
Salmon and sardines
and Cottage cheese

Just like zyzz.

It's not pleasurable, your body is supposed to suffer.

Thanks Dr. Tripfaggot for your professional internet advice.

>good keto
oxymoron

it's not real keto if it's good, you're just eating low carb or high protein diet

is it possible to proper bulk on keto?

I'm a t1 diabetic and i find my blood sugar infinitely easier to control while I eat low carb, but it's hard to get 3000 cals a day on low carb. I also feel like shit while eating all these carbs.

Damn that was clean
>checked too

I prefer the Aldi flat bread. It's like 6 grams of carbs but it's a rounded rectangle shape so it's easier to roll wraps. Those just break if you heat them up

What's the one on the left?

My current favorite is a big slab of salmon fried in olive oil, and served with British-style cauliflower-cheese.

Some stores in the US carry it. You can always buy some off the internet.

Kinda, I only need one meal a day. They're large meals, around 1200kcal, but I don't get hungry until the next day.

It works extremely well for losing weight. It's also ideal for T2 diabetics.

Works for me. It's the only "just a diet" that's ever helped me lose weight. The only other time in my adult life when I lost significant weight, I was living in a fifth-floor walkup apartment and was too broke to afford to buy food.

Holy shit, that's one of my standard meals too. Well, minus the avocado and the almond milk. I just drink diet soda.

You're a moron. I'm a type 2, was told at diagnosis that I would absolutely be insulin dependent, immediately went full keto, and about four or five months later I didn't even need any of the oral medications much less ever even once using insulin, all thanks to keto dieting. It's ideal for type 2 diabetics.

Found it:
edamamu.com/8-tasty-ketogenic-meals-help-lose-weight/

Thanks, OP, gonna try those things on the left. :-)

Keto is a weight loss diet. Why would you want to bulk on it? Just eat a normal diet with good carbs

yea id say this these tortillas always worked well except for the fact that they make me feel like death. frankly id rather just eat a real wrap with the carbs and work my way back for how much it fucks with my digestion.

My grandmother is a type two, has been for 35 years. He diet for the last 15 years has been soley, and I'm dead serious
1 sprite a day (she hasn't drank any water in 8 years, none)
Between 1 - 4 large glasses of buttermilk with, not an exaggeration, 1/4 cup of white sugar dumped in
Maybe a sandwich every so often
1 pint of ice cream a week

That's it. It's fucking horrifying. She'll eat a pint of ice cream in one go and immediately shit on herself. There's a brown stain on the carpet from her chair to the bathroom.

There is no god.

>Why would you want to bulk on it?
because as I said I'm a type 1 diabetic and I find it much easier to control my blood sugar when I'm on a low carb diet. I also find I feel way better when I lower my carb intake.

>purchase spiraler
>Make zuccini noodles
>Delicious fucking no carb pasta dishes all the fucking time

You have to make your own sauce or be watchen dem sugars in the jarred shit, though if you are doing keto you should already be reading every label.

Can't beat a pile of good scrambled eggs and breakfast meats. When I did hard mode keto last fall I was eating a fuck ton of omlette's. Did lose 40lbs in a month and a half though.

Actually, the only known long-term side effect is kidney stones. You have to try to drink a lot of water to prevent this. Gallstones come from weight loss on a high-carb diet.

Huh. Also type 1. I'll try working out religiously on keto if you will. What the hell, right?

>Eating fake versions of the food you avoid
You ketofags are just like vegans

what is coconut oil?

Is it difficult to go keto but not lose weight? Potentially gain?

I already do workout damn near religiously

Just eat at your daily maintenance calories.

...

So you said you're low-carb, but not in dietary ketosis? A few years ago I was doing that and I got pretty fucking strong. Decided I needed to rein in my blood sugars and I was worried about becoming insulin resistant. So I lost a lot of fat, but not really very much muscle. You're having trouble gaining muscle though? Are you letting your blood sugar get high? Is it just not enough protein? Not enough calories? Are you not lifting heavy enough?

hey dumbfuck, you just posted a keto diet

>breadcrumbs
>limes
>pesto
all 3 are oozing with carbs ya dimwit

Grill chicken breast or thighs. Sauté some onions, a handful or 2 of baby spinach, and fresh mushrooms together in some butter or olive/coconut oil. Heat up some canned lentils. I like progresso lentil soup.
Put the mushrooms, spinach, onion on plate. Place grilled chicken on top of that. Put some pepper jack cheese on, bout 1/4 cup or so. Take about 1/3 c of lentil soup and pour that over everything. Add fresh jalapeños. Enjoy. Very good.

How many toes has she lost? Does she still have her eyesight?

You actually have a point there. . . . But I want "low carb" tortillas because of the form factor and convenience. Carrying around a mess of fried ground beef on a plate isn't as easy as bringing a burrito to work for lunch.

It's oil, and it's from coconuts. . . . This is not a riddle.

Well, the cottage cheese is a little iffy. . . .

Those aren't breadcrumbs you mong, that's cauliflower.

the list of foods you can eat on keto sounds very nice because it's a lot of foods we crave. What we don't realize is that after being on keto a couple of days we'll start to really miss what's not on the list

I did keto for a year and it gave me crippling constipation, diminished gains in the gym, and was barely good for losing weight. How is it still a thing?

How? I don't even follow keto (or any diet for that matter heh), but isn't keto all about cutting carbs, which pretty much means cutting sugar?
How would that make you more diabetic?

Where do you get carbs in this diet? From the workout?

Ketobese dieters think as long as you cut out carbs you can eat literally anything. It's not surprising that you had constipation as fiber is typically lacking when you don't eat any grains or beans or vegetables.

Yeah except I still tried to get plenty of leafy greens, just all the cheese and saturated fat killed my gut bacteria, as far as I can tell.

Nowadays I eat significantly less animal products and my insides love me for it.

>thinking you can't eat vegetables on keto
ok retard

>no carb pasta dishes
A zucchini has like 10g carbs, so if you're wolfing it down and combining it with anything else with carbs (protip, virtually any tomato based sauce has some carbs), it's not even close to "no carb".

More like 4

dunno. i'm trying to be Veeky Forums and hear this burns fat like crazy.

Diabetic here (type 2), keto is awesome for diabetics. I don't even need insulin thanks to sticking to keto.

Yeah, I don't take nearly as many dumps as I used to. On the other hand, I don't get gas from it. If I really want to force it, I can have a couple of entire heads of broccoli with butter and cheese; that does cause some gas, but more importantly the sheer amount of fiber gets things cleared out within a day, and usually within a few hours.

So much this. I eat probably four or five times as much vegetables now on keto, because I'm not eating processed junk. Cauliflower and broccoli mostly, but also salads and cabbage and such.

I am not a ketofag but my brother has been doing it and lost 16lbs already. He started New Years.

It's perfect for a low carb diet you imbecile

I wasn't arguing against that, and I'd like you to take your accusation of "imbecile" and direct it at yourself. The person being responded to claimed "no carb", which is demonstrably false.

Keto can cure type 2
Keep up

>lost 16 pounds in 22 days

this would basically require him to consume no food whatsoever unless he's like 400 pounds and exercising for hours per day

There are too many variables when it comes to the best diet or the best way to eat. They only thing that is proven to work with weight loss is calories in calories out. It even works with gaining weight.

Eggplant sliced into disks and brushed with melted lard with a pastry brush. On top put diced vegetables, cheese, bacon and grill in the oven.

Another one, slice zucchini into long thin strips like pasta. Put it in a pan and saute' with minced garlic then add a bottle of cream, cheese, bacon, chicken. I cook the "pasta" in lard, but any fat will do. It will incorporate and flavour the sauce so you can be liberal. I used to use butter but I was drinking sticks of it in my coffee and I've gone off it.

how can I increase my shit size?