Wake up

>wake up
>read 45 pages of Ubik like a good little pseudointellectual consumerwhore
>read 33 pages of the fountainhead like a good little pseudointellectual consumerwhore (but I enjoyed it)
>clean my room
>go to gym and realise I'm still weak due to coffee ruined sleep- can BARELY do 5 reps of 315 lbs when 2 years ago I could go in to the gym and do 10 reps of 315 lbs on a whim
>hurt my back on the 4th rep and tell myself between 4th and 5th rep, "if I get this I'll give up coffee"
>immediately after doing the rep I think, "...after this weekend"
>now not even sure of that
>going in to central London to drink coffee, browse Veeky Forums on my phone, feel sad about life
>saw multiple qts and Chad and Stacey couples just from my flat to the train (Saturdays are brutal)

Can I add anything new? Or is everything about life summed up?

I have no philosophy of life. I'm just floating in the nihilistic unspooked void. All goals, morals etc. seem like childish self limiting beliefs.

I feel like I have to read ten trillion boring books and go through boring as fuck textbooks. I feel guilty for not having an autistic tier level of focus.

Background:
>aged 26
>no friends or social life since 18
>no female attention ever
>went through university with zero social experiences
>became the loner nobody talks to within two days of my current job
>never been to pub, club, or party
>missed out on all the 16 - 22 formative social experiences that people look back on fondly (teen crushes, school prom, school dances, university fresher's week, any sort of relationships at all)
>know that women all have 5000 tinder matches and think the average male is ugly; seeing attractive women everywhere is demoralising
>feel completely bitter and detached from others due to being an ugly subhuman; lifting weights did nothing

do you see yourself ever being happy in the future?

religion, the army and/or drugs are three popular alternatives when looking for meaning.
Have you tried any of those?

This pasta is getting elaborate

>your history does not determine your future
>why did you go through uni without doing things? could you have done anything differently?
> the formative experiences will come, senpai
>you don't need 5000 matches to find love, i had maybe like 50

Count yourself lucky guv'nor, you ain't been blown away by one of those Muslamics yet.

This is all a lie. It's just memes

I wouldn't recomend the army or drugs for the same reason.

>I feel like I have to read ten trillion boring books and go through boring as fuck textbooks.
>I feel guilty for not having an autistic tier level of focus.
user, please stop that. If you don't enjoy what you're reading, why do it? Because you're not a "patrician" then? That's just a retarded label people give themselves so they can pretend they're better than others.
Read what you want to read, not what you "should" read. Best wishes. Love you.

Please start using a trip, thank you

>I'm just floating in the nihilistic unspooked void. All goals, morals etc. seem like childish self limiting beliefs.
This is probably the most childish thing I've read today. Are you 16?

>enjoying The Fountainhead
>but not Ubik

Guys, it's 4:30 and I haven't even done anything other than sit around. What is there to do at this time in london? I'm thinking of walking through the Camden town area and regents park for the cathartic subhuman experience but that's all I can think of

I'm in a pretty similar situation as you. Here's the advice I can give:
>take showers daily if you aren't already
>get a haircut if you haven't in a while
>try drinking tea instead of coffee
>read books you want to read

I do the first two, lol

Why would I drink tea? It's like admitting I'm a sissy. Either coffee or no coffee, no in-between option that's admitting I'm a weak failure.

But then the pseuds will harass me

What's wrong with coffee?

>take showers daily if you aren't already
Idiot
That way you destroy your skin (microbes)

bill gates im your stepson

Free will is a lie fed to us by normies.

Accept that your past was essentially pre-determined and that your future is too.

Don't let the normies make you feel guilty because their life is build upon the false foundation of free will. They are nothing but robots. Realize this to become illimitable

Jesus Christ it's a beverage

You don't have to use shampoo everytime you shower.

This won't help OP

Alright agreed
Hot showers are not good for the skin too, though admittedly that hasn't stopped me from taking them

How about you just fucking try it? Some people find tea to be less addicting and more energizing. I just drink coffee because I don't need caffeine that often but I'm just offering advice that other people have given me. Why are you guys so adverse to change?

why don't we have free will? how does accepting destiny relieve limitations?

Nigga I was just asking for the benefits of tea over coffee. Stop sperging out because I asked you a question.

>>went through university with zero social experiences
How?????

>Background:
>>aged 26
>>no friends or social life since 18
>>no female attention ever
dude you live in
LONDON
O
N
D
O
N
Use meetup, go to language exchanges and meet some of the spaniards that plague the city, they are open and friendly, look for expat communities in social networks... Meeting new people is so easy in any big city and you have chosen that miserable life of yours

please stop posting

christ... I'd give my index finger to live in london