I know it's kinda commonsensical that this is garbage, but have any of you actually read Fifty Shades of Grey...

I know it's kinda commonsensical that this is garbage, but have any of you actually read Fifty Shades of Grey? Holy shit, this is some middle-school art class-tier writing except for the porn

I skimmed through it. Yeah, it's porn. It's unbelievable that people thought it was acceptable and even proud - look at me, I read, I'm an intellectual - to read it in public. It's the equivalent of watching but play videos on your phone while on the bus.

>slutty airhead girl in 11th grade was reading this in English class
>teacher snatches the book out of her hands and starts reading aloud from it
>entire class keks hard
>teacher gives the book back and, suddenly becoming stern, tells the girl never to show such plebeian pornographic filth on school grounds ever again
I laughed. Also people these days are soft. You want real s&m, read de Sade, Mirbeau and Masoch.

sade didn't even complete 120 days of sodom but what he did complete puts this garbage to shame

I had a friend in college who liked porn and had all kinds of gross out on her phone (once she showed one of those bailey jay gifs to a male friend). One day she mentioned 50 shades, so i lent her juliette. Two or three days later she demanded my copy of justine as well. She thanked me for introducing her to de sade and admitted that fifty shades was tame garbage.

The book is awful in and of itself, but if you can, try to find a copy of the fic with the ANs intact. It's hilarious commentary and an insight into an overindulgent wannabe alcoholic wine drinking basement dweller wanking off to the sound of her inner goddess.

No word of a lie, she says she wrote some of the fic chapters while drinking wine in her basement.

women love to read about lust, get over it

Would he have done the same for Anais Nin?

That's a shitty excuse desu. You can fap to better stuff on Literotica. All fiction is tiered, even in its own niche niche.

> bailey jay gifs

You're gonna have to explain what you mean for I am a devoted mormon.

this isn't imgur, delete this

And written by a jewess right?

Probably not, although Anais Nin is still a boring pleb-tier hag.

Give me some essential literotica readings I go there all the time but everything I've ever read there has been garbage

I barely finished the first book and read maybe ten pages into the second. They're almost literally unreadable, a real mental struggle to get through. And not because it's porn; this isn't good porn, unless you get off on awkward English.

A female friend in hs called me out for saying it was garbage without reading it and demanded I read the first chapter before I criticized it. It was really fucking bad, she was writing with words she thought sounded literary but didn't understand. I specifically remember laughing at a line where the girl got in an elevator that "ascended at terminal velocity." I didn't even get to the sex, I can't imagine how painful reading that would get.

Not necessarily, the selling point of 50th shades is the chick is completely useless and submissive, but society tells her to stand up for herself

Then it comes a chad multibillionaire who gives her a few cents but he wants her body and submission, so as long as he is paying her she throws away her morals and everything for him

Its basically playing with women natural submission, that society still tries to portray they don't have

based teacher

>also people these days are soft

Yeah, my main problem with 50 Shades is that it isn't shocking enough for a book that came out in 2011, after people had at least a full decade of access to internet porn. If you want to shock people, you have to go for cock vore, My Little Pony porn, guro, tentacle monsters, etc.

This could be a pasta

That one about the chick that sucked the guy off every day yet couldn't get him to cum was pretty funny.