Al/ck/ thread

>woke up with your condom still on edition

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first for pisswater

>went to company party
>said something to one of the managers
>now he never talks to me again

Good thing I don't work in his department. Phew.

first for natty ice, gnomes and that one anons dad scheming on them.

That ain't no thang. I constantly give attitude to managers from other departments. As long as they ain't my immediate superiors I don't give a fuck.

old thread

>woke up with the condom in the pizza box

Also after how drunk I got at the Christmas party this one smarmy fucker at work keeps asking me if I drank a lot the past weekend.

I'm at 36 days sober and really want to drink. I'm bored and i just binge ate about 2k calories worth of chips/ice cream/pathetic junk foods. I almost rather would've just got a pint of whiskey. I'm supposed to be losing weight but then i get cravings and lose my cool.

I drink vodka every day and it's not fun anymore. I only drink to make the feeling of impending heart attack go away. I spend every morning feeling like death and writing things like fuck alcohol and no more on notepads in the hope that my evening self will remember, but then I just go buy more vodka and feel better for a few hours. I never really get sloppy or black out, I just want to feel like I'm not going to die any minute. How do I not feel terrible without drinking vodka?

taper

it's not worth it, your brain just doesn't want to remember how bad WD and alcoholism really is because it's wired for quick gratification.

what was the condom on, your back?

I've tried to taper by counting shots/ buying less sooo many times. I can't do beer. I seriously just want to handcuff myself to a flagpole for a week but daily responsibilities don't allow that.

>woke up with pizza sauce on your dick

they will go away in time. No worries.

>woke up with your dick stuck to the curtains with stale cum

Start praying to Jesus.

only have like 3 options my dude
taper, treatment or cold turkey

I'm in the same boat. Started my taper today, went cold turkey for about 12 hours and it was so bad. Sweating, panics, sorta shaky, it's so shit.

had a total of 7 tall boys today. One at lunch and then the other 6 over a 5 hour period. Might get one or two more I can feel the WD starting to creep back in but it's definitely more manageable. I even had a little appetite.

Gonna start going to meetings once i'm totally clean and get a sponsor and actually work the steps. I thought i was losing my mind today.

I've been a regular in these threads for years and years, occasionally taking a break when they get to be too much for me and I'm afraid I'll relapse when I quit for periods of time.

I know I've seen this gnome shit mentioned in the past but I never paid much attention to it. Can anyone explain?

find the number one reason why you feel terrible
ex: no friends, dead end job, etc.
then start taking steps to overcome your problem
make sure you do something every day, no matter low little it is

Wait don't mess with me here , did you get gnomes too?
I have never met someone else to get the gnomes.
What did you see.

No, I didn't get gnomes. But tell me about what you're experiencing.

Right now nothing, as I took the necessary precautions to get them to go away briefly.
I can't describe the gnomes in great detail right now.
I am still hunting and making sure they dont show back up.

Mostly I check the house for gnome signs and if I spot one I need to starting hunting them.
They are skittish and leave quickly during a hunt.
They dress not like a stereotypical gnome-suit like some fantasy shit but in rags and robes. But I don't dare spot them when they are preforming tricks or they get mad as shit.
The first time I saw one he was stealing my neighbors mail and I caught him and they tortured my household for 4-6 weeks.

>drunkenly looking at bbw's on pof again


I predict fucking a very fat ugly girl, Very soon

Every fucking day man. Sometimes I lay awake in bed and just repeat the lord's prayer in my head ad infinitum. No luck yet.

But also it could be either

My subconscious manifesting gnomes to punish me for not being a good person
Mental illness is a possibility
Real gnome fuckers
or WD delusions.

Or a combination of all 4.
I think I have it narrowed down to whats causing it.

Well I guess I can't stop you, have fun and be safe. It could be worse you could be going down on a prostitute. So cheers to not doing that.

Have you been to the doctors over this shit? I mean I'm sure you've explained yourself several times and have had people say that to you, but I'm just curious about what you've tried.

It seems like hallucinations (possibly WD's) or schizophrenia of some sort honestly.

The lord is around, he may not be comprehensible by a mortal , yet he is still around as a higher-dimensional being. There is so much that we cannot explain and the bible was a great interpretation of him.

Pray to him and he will understand.
But ultimately it is up to you to have the willpower and strength to change for he wants you to live to the best of your ability and will reward you for trying, even if you fail.

I feel terrible because I drink, I know that. But I also feel better when I drink. I need someone to tell me that in x amount of time after not drinking, you won't feel like your heart is going to explode and you'll actually feel ok again. How long does that take? Just give me a goal, something that will allow me to make notches on a stick and give me hope.

No doctor necessary, I understand that these gnomes where probably placed in my path for a reason, to combat them is to succeed.
When they are gone I do well.
And I am getting better at battling them.

Aight that's it, I'm sweeping my entire house for audio bugs.

That's the curse of working a cushy office job, you cant just go around getting into fights with co-workers. When you work blue collar you can just handle it in the parking lot.

Gain better willpower to only drink a bit before bed or at socially acceptable hours.

The true way is to drink in moderation or not drink at all. Yet we all seem to have trouble with both.
I just want to go back to having a glass of whiskey or two a day.

Hope I didnt get you paranoid user. Audio bugs are expensive and it is most likely just an el cheapo tape recorder. But do report back.

I've been there brother and everytime it was more shameful than an embarrassing blackout bender.

nah I appreciate it man, he's a real worm and has done shit like record me on his phone or take pics of my bedroom. That's absolutely within the guys wheelhouse. You may well have saved me a ton of trouble, worse case I just waste a few hours roaming around looking for audio bugs

just go a full workweek without drinking
then once you know it's possible, you take longer and longer breaks

Gnomes are real, and so are faeries and aliens and shit. Guy sounds sane to me. I'd advise him to read some old folklore on how to deal with them. Also quit drinking.

Indeed. Demons are very real too, which to me is evidence of some sort of god whether he be Christian or otherwise. Can't have darkness without the light

Okay damn maybe I could be right.
I hope I'm wrong though because that is some super-shady shit.
I battle gnomes so I know all about trickery.
and dealt with the law/courts enough to know police procedure.

I know the feel. I've considered AA too even though I hate the "you're a helpless addict, submit to god" thing. I just need to be around other struggling alkies that keep telling me not to drink, I guess. Power in numbers sort of thing, maybe.

>woke up with someone else's cum on the pizza box

Anyone here drink boneshaker its delicious

could be worse. it could be a ginger girl

I liked it when I went for about 4 months. Hard part is sticking around long enough to develop an actual community that holds each other accountable.

I'm just so tired of the fear.

What is "the fear" for you? I really never had problems with anxiety or social interaction, myself. I just get a deeply uncomfortable sensation in my chest like I'm going to have a heart attack and die if I don't ingest a glass of vodka asap.

Is this just corn's survival mechanism? Am I a slave to a cereal grain? Are plants really just that much smarted than mammals?

It feels like existing is just terrifying. LIke I'm electric and exhausted at the same time. Basically bordering on panic attack, delving into panic for a bit and then coming back to the border for hours on end.

lmao never thought about it like that.

how do I get rid of the fear?

Exgf's dad died user here. Trying to check in with this bitch every so often, but she keeps being a cunt to me. Should I just give up on us ever getting back together?

Ata boy

You're still trying? I think that ship has sailed 20 years ago.

Give up man, I saw the way it went down. Give up.

>Should I just give up on us ever getting back together
Yes you should. Just accept that it's over. Trust me, I wasted the better part of a decade trying to "win back" a girl. You'll just waste your fucking tine because the best she's going to do is use you as an emotional tampon.

I don't get how I turned into such a sad faggot after only 4 years with her. When I first met this cunt, I was fucking some other broad and neither knew about the other.

Karma for cheating man.
youtube.com/watch?v=6pHNkOQCIzk

Tapering helps to diminish it, but if you're trying to get sober there isn't really a way around it.

Drinking helps but that will just make it worse in the long run. Showers, going for a walk and just binging menial youtube shit helps, but I'm always too jumpy to really enjoy much of anything.

I have a moderate case of the fear right now.

he never said he cheated, just that he met the girl while banging another girl. You dont immediately become monogamous with a girl you just met you weenie

Aye i missed the When i first met this cunt,

But when does it stop??? I need reassurance that I won't feel like I'm on thd verge of death someday.

This is what happened yeah. But she was the needy one at first. I used to be so self assured and shit

That's what you get for showing the hoes love.

Fuck man who cares about love and romance. You're going to suffer and get sick and die. What the fuck is life and why do people think it's good? Please god help me.

Usually about 3 days if I taper. It decreases in intensity daily. The heart rate shit fixes it self relatively quickly if i remember correctly.

Alcohol is a poison. We just gotta stop poisoning ourselves and we won't feel like we're dying.

Also it never goes away, it just hides if we don't drink.

We can't drink and not get the fear. If you get drunk, you will get the fear every time.

pro-tip: stop fighting it, just let go. Even if you did die, which you're not, it would be putting you out of your misery

Just drank the pint of whiskey I had initially intended to dump. It wasn't enough, and I want wine but I'll probably settle for weed. At least that way I'll just pass out and not be mean or anything

weed >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> wine

Can't fucking sleep. I'm exhausted but I"m just laying here rolling around watching fucking ja/ck/ videos.

Out of taper beers and didn't go to get more. This feeling sucks. Hopefully I feel better tomorrow.

get outta here

Wine
>tastes like shit
>gives shitty hangovers
>will probably make you grow a vagina
DUDE WEED
>tastes great
>combines with the drunken feeling perfectly
>wont cause you to ruin your life unless you are actually retarded and abuse the fuck out of it
>is illegal so you know its good

Wine
>tastes like shit
You're right port is better

weed makes me freak out, i smoked a tiny bit about a week ago just at home alone, and couldn't relax for shit, just ending up walking around my house trying to give myself things to do to take my mind off it. felt like the old woman from requiem for a dream.
it's a shame, because i used to smoke it a lot, and enjoyed it for a while.

(red) wine tastes nice and makes me comfy, is good.

Hey look on the bright side eventually enough time will pass and she will just be a distant memory.

friendly reminder that we have a very lovely irc chat channel
client00.chat.mibbit.com/?channel=#al/ck/&server=irc.rizon.net

Can I add you on Friendster first, gramps?

no fuck off you nigger kike

based

love al/ck/
hate everything else

Fuck both you queers. I'd fuck your old ass up and then spark your gay lover out with one shot.

say that to my face internet tough guy and not just drunk on a mongolian horse archery forum and see what happens

drinking on a monday night
gotta wake up in 7 hours for a psychologist appt before work. ain't life just peachy

>tfw literally walked 2 miles to throatfuck a fat prostitute till she puked for $40 then walked 2 miles back home. Just glad I didn't drive. Wew.

How do you guys cut cost? I'm not that bad yet but the cost is just so fucking much. It's at almost $100 a week for me buying bottom barrel spirits

Drink bottomer shelf.

I drink 3 handles of popov a week and that's only 48 dollars

WTF I'm getting fucked. Popov is 20$ a handle where I'm at.

I guess I drink about 5 handles. Maybe it's because I drink Whiskey? Is Vodka cheaper?

>tfw got a fat ass bbw coming over tomorrow after just a few hrs of drunkly hitting on pawgs on pof

I can already smell the sweaty pussy and regret

Damn nigga where? The Bible belt?

That's what makes me sad though. We were talking about getting engaged and shit

>Is Vodka cheaper?
Is the pope catholic?

what's up with you guys and fatties?

Sorry user. I really don't know much. I've only ever really drank Whiskey since being an adult. Vodka tastes disgusting to me.

In my case, I just picked the first hooker i saw since I was so tired from my walk to that area

Los Angeles. Wish I was back in Dixie so I could ranomly find moonshine on hikes.

Fatties are more likely to put up with alcoholics and its rare you'll find a bbw who isn't tighter then the virgin Mary.

I also like fat asses, So the whole thing fits me like a glove

Did you nut at least

Yeah, hard. To make her puke was unexpected, but definitely pushed me over.

living the dream

Why does vomiting feel so good?