ITT: Pleb stories thread

>Before religions class
>guy sitting next to me is a grungy hipster but I go to school in hipster epicenter so I don't think anything of it
>ignore smell of cigarettes and return to reading platform sutra
>it has something about zen on the cover
>"Aw dude, that's zen right?"
>guy shows me his tattoo of the ying yang symbol
>"I love zen man, that's my lifestyle."
>Ask him if he's read the book
>"Nah, I just listened to a few Alan Watts podcasts on Apple"
>Guy behind us butts in
>"DUDE ALAN WATTS? DID YOU HEAR THE FUNNY KO ANNE ABOUT THE FROG"
>"AW YEAH DUDE"
>new guy almost immediately starts talking about baseball is a religion
>mfw

I sorta know this feel. I've met people who have had shit tattooed on themselves without them knowing a thing about it. Someone had a misquote from a book they never read, shit like that makes me cringe.

Man, I want to minor in English (majoring in phil) but I haven't read much fiction at all. I just know I'm gonna end up in one of the threads you fucking fedora lords make.

>Someone had a misquote from a book they never read, shit like that makes me cringe.
I would just crack up laughing. I look forward to the day I see someone with a tattoo that says '"I may not believe in what you say, but I defend to the death your right to say it." -Voltaire'

Ignorance is a source of ironic humor

>reading book in university library
>Nietzche's Thus spoke Zarathrustra
>some THOT comes up and asking me what I'm reading
>tell her I don't give plot summaries of what I read
>put the book up on the shelf
>walk away
I had forgotten it was a cooy I ourchased ooff amazon

clever

who says its not happened already

10/10

10/10

>Sitting in common area waiting for class
>Reading Freud's interpretation of dreams
>Cute chick comes up
>What're you reading?
>(Well nothing now)"Eh, it's mostly nonsense. I just finished reading through the other psychoanalysts and thought i'd do some backtracking."
>"So he's like a philosophizer?"
>"We're done here"

Why does everyone turn into such a sperglord when their morality is questioned?

Fixed for you, snowflake

This is one for the folders

RAGE

Hmm, really made me rub my chin.

>Be me
>Secretly wish some qt will approach me while I'm reading in public and talk to me
>Read anyway because it's what I love, but never approached by qts
>Sad, but confident it will all work out
>Eventually work up the courage to chat up girl in my college class because she seems kind and interesting
>One word answers. Mildly annoyed at my audacity to speak at her.
>Slink away. Very sad, but never showing
>Return to book, always welcoming me. Girls there are pretty and don't hate me.
>Wonder in the back of my mind why I'm so repulsive
>Work out regularly, but don't look like a roided out freak. Sort of skinny I guess
>Realize I must just be really unpleasant to be around, like everyone can smell the fear and anxiety coming off me in waves
>Despair
>Mfw this has happened several times throughout my life

Girls sure are plebs, guys.

:(

>Êtes-vous moi? and other stories.

This is a sad post. Do something that makes you happy. Start a YouTube channel. Play an instrument. The ukulele seems easy and stupid, but if you buy a tenor and get a low G string, it's not a bad instrument. Or even the mandolin - it's got such a unique sound. Start running every day in places you've never been. Do photography. Find happiness for yourself outside of women.

Also maybe try medication.

If you have a busted ass face, it won't matter how much you work out. Most women care more about the face than the body, although if your body is repulsive in terms of weight or odor that will outweigh a 10/10 face.

But if it isn't your face, I would just try talking to women more, especially women you aren't attracted to. This will help you develop more intimate intellectual relationships with women that aren't based on the physical

Alpha as fuck, my dude.

Motherfucker this is gold

> it'sa me, bookguy
> reading The Decameron in uni waiting room before the class starts
> just started it
> people talking loudly as they wait
> causes me to reread same passage over and over like i didn't understand it
> someone asks casually but probably not really interested whether the book is good
> i tell them that it is
> "how do you know that if you just started it huh, you're a slow reader huh"

Twin Peaks is Dr Who for Americans

I read during my lunch break talk about books and don't sperg out if other staff members don't read 'literary' works.

Results in comfy book talk and you'd be surprised to know who has read decent stuff.

Funny that.

Start brazilian jiu jitsu or judo if there is an academy in your city. It does wonders to guys confidence. Most anxiety comes from a feeling of inferiority. If you can choke out 90% of guys you start to change mentally.

Plus you can build your rape skillz if girls still ignore you after getting confident.

"no"

I write a zine that includes stories of "AUTHOR INTERACTS WITH THE PUBLIC". Riding the bus gives plenty of pleb time. I'll post an excerpt when I get home.

You watch bad television.

>tfw I'm the pleb who drunkenly tattooed an Om symbol on my arm
>never read any eastern philosophy or religious texts

good on you mate

>Spending hours of your day aitting inbetween a sweaty mans thighs and developing spine injuries all for a skill you will literally never use
Just find a physical hobby you enjoy desu

let this be real

Noice!

Wrong

Only tangentially related:
>going through a phase where I drink beer in a coffee cup and read at random places downtown because I can't sleep
>look up from my book to see two girls staring at me and whispering
>the brunette drags over the blushing blonde
>they're MAYBE 14, you can tell they're only a couple years into puberty from their pert little bodies that are filling out more by the day
>"w-what are you reading?"
>some short story from tolstoyevski
>"oh, that's cool. We're here from [suburb] to see Wicked for choir class."
>still blushing, she makes nervous eye contact and small talk for about 10 minutes while I politely reciprocate
>"w-well we have to go, s-see you."
I always look back on this moment with regret that i didn't allow myself to indulge in the patrician art of seducing virginal pubescents.

>most women care more about the face than the body

Hahahaha you fucking moron. Are you asian or something?

Hit a nerve, eh? It's true.

He's right, my user. As long as you're not fat, face carries far more weight than body when it comes to a woman deciding how attractive you are.

>Find happiness for yourself outside of women
I've given this advice to people before, but it's different for me. All I want out of life is a wife and children to establish a big family like the ones other people have. Irma came right over my house, and it sort of put the terror of not realizing that dream into me. Anxiety has made me a major agoraphobe, and the fact is that people make me happy. But I have no friends and I get the feeling girls just dislike me, so it's like even the most humble of goals can't be reached by people like me. And drug addiction runs in my family, I'd rather suffer than be like them, no offense meant to people here who use them. Thanks for your kind advice. I don't usually bitch this much. Honest.

I may have a busted face, I don't know. I guess there's just no fixing certain things. I'm skinny, and I think girls prefer overweight guys to skinny guys. I do 200 pushups every other day, down from my high school number of 500. I guess it's poetic justice that I peaked in hs and all the football players and etc. I knew now have their own families and homes. Karma only works on the negative side.

I definitely feel inferior. The only things I've ever been good at are writing and reading. I'd burn all my books now if it meant I could just be happy.

The rape thing you said is disgusting. I know it was probably a joke, but I'm not that fucked in the head.

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I have a buddy like this, only w/ the yin yang

>I'm skinny, and I think girls prefer overweight guys to skinny guys

If you're doing 200 push-ups you've twice the bulk I do.

This is painfully true. I see hungry skellingtons and chubby guys getting with 9/10's all the fucking time purely because they have good facial aesthetics.

My chest and triceps look alright, but the rest of me is mostly skellington. I used to have a chest like a bull, and it was the only time girls ever showed interest. I had opportunities to have sex back then, but every gf I had thought we were in love and I honestly didn't love them back, so I never had sex with any of them because I didn't want to exploit their need for my affection. It would have been like stealing, only worse.

I'm a virgin now at 23, which I guess doesn't bother me that much. I'd be fine having one sexual partner for life, so long as she was the right one. But I often think the roles next time will be reversed and I'll get what's coming to me. I hope not.
I'm just hoping for some good luck.

I should clarify: I only had one gf at a time. I wasn't running around behind a bunch of girls' backs.

You don't have to love someone as long as you let them love you, if they love you. That's as close to requited love as they can get, and most people are OK with that. I mean, unless she literally said "I will not have sex with you unless you swear upon pain of death to marry me," I would say you fucked up. But I don't need to tell you that, the regret drips off of your post

>at Booksamillion
>only place in 100 miles radius, not counting Amazon
>poetry section
>some girl and her boyfriend are looking at Poe
>say, "I don't want to be rude, but may I make a suggestion"
>she says sure
>"try Wallace Stevens"
>she thanks me, then I look at her stack and see Rupi Kaur
>I leave the aisle, embarrassed for her
>hear her say to her boyfriend, "Don't you realize that, like, SAAAD poetry is the best kind because it, like, speaks to your SOULLLL"
>leave the store both laughing and crying

Doctor Who is an epidemic in America. My sister wore a Dr Who tshirt and talked about her favorite doctor. I asked how long she's watched the series and she said, "Well, I haven't actually watched it, but I want to."

At least Twin Peaks is decent, it's the just fanbase I hate. Season 3 was best.

I stand by my decisions, but I admit that I made them under the impression that there would be someone else to look forward to someday soon after. I still hope for that. But I think I'm much less of a man now, so my doubts are growing. It seems unfair to expect a good woman to see something good in me when not even I can.

I don't think I'd feel any better now if I'd taken advantage of some sad girl's love five years back. But I like your idea of taking love as it's offered. It's a beautiful thought.

Twin Peaks was terrible. Only the pilot of season 1 was watchable.

>in used bookshop on busy street in area with lots of homeless
>Woman comes in
>"Do you have any Jackie Collins?"
>Owner says uh no we normally just sell books that are more geared toward literature
>"What should I do then?"
>Try the bigger brand bookstore
>"Oh they can't let me back in there after I was caught stealing a Jackie Collins book" and walks away
>Several minutes later a homeless guy walks in
>"Ya got the Bible?!"
>Uh yes, which version?
>"The one with Jesus!"
>As opposed to the one with Mohammad?
>"Huh?!"
>Owner has a wry smile directs him to the stack of Bibles
>Guy picks up one and goes to pay
>Slams down three dollars, a cigarette a crack rocm
>I can't accept this
>"Fuck, crack is more reliable than Jesus anyway" and walks out
>Undergrad walks in
>"Do you have any melancholic Japanese literature sir?"
>That's a specific request
>"Well I like to be very very precise"
>Well you can root around and see if any of the Japanese authors I have suit your taste
>Pauses "hmm on second thought do you have a good translation of Heart of a Dog?"
>Point to shelf with Bulgakov on it
>"Yes but which is the PRECISE translation. I want to feel the Russian dripping off the page"
>Owner looks lost. Just take two and read the first paragraph of each and compare
>Takes two and starts reading while stroking his shaven face and constantly hmmm hmmm-ing
>All this within 20 minutes of me being in the shop

Not a Veeky Forums story, but whatever
>be hanging out with girl I like
>ask how she likes her coffee
>she says black
>put nothing in it and hand it to her
>she proceeds to put sugar in it
>ask her why, she just said she likes it black
>she proceeds to tell me sugar doesn't change the color of coffee, so coffee with sugar is still black coffee

You obviously met someone from Veeky Forums for that last one. No one else can possibly live like that

You are the pleb

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is it not normal to specify translations? i fucking hate when i go to the bookstore and order in a specific translation and they get the penguin version.

That's just like, your opinion, man.

>ying yang
you do know that isn't how you spell it right?

quadruple kek

...

It's called the 太極 or taikyoku in japanese, didn't impact the story that much so I described it as most people would recognize it.

> tfw I got pynched by the Lynch!

There is no correct spelling when you transcribe a word from a language that uses a different writing system than your own, you pleb.

>virginal

screencapped

keep trying user. don't let the haters get u down

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