This is David Foster Walrus. Say something nice about him

This is David Foster Walrus. Say something nice about him.

He has more discernible talent than David Foster Wallace, and he can rock the bandana better.

le walruse

Can some one make David froster Wallace?

Here you go

Top Kek, potentially toppest in the history of DFW memes

I took a creative nonfiction course with him at Ponoma back in '94. We weren't allowed to show anyone our essays outside of the class for some reason. He seemed naturally intelligent, didnt need to look at any notes or textbooks or prepare for any lectures, he just knew his stuff and was super casual.

I saw him talking to a girl on campus one day. He uncharacteristically wore a Fila sweatsuit, the kind that looks like it's made from the same material as parachutes, and trainer sneakers with a matching bandana. That was his pussy hunt outfit apparently. Several times a week, same outfit, I'd see him hitting on women in it. I once saw him wearing it while carrying an identical outfit from the dry cleaners, he had like 4 sets of same Fila sweatsuit.

I asked him about it in class and he said we aren't allowed to discuss anything unrelated to class while inside class, the same way we can't show anyone outside of class our essays. A student called out "but Dostoevsky isn't in this class and last week you talked about replicating his black tea obsession to test its affects on your own writing". Wallace stared blankly at the student with dead eyes for 30 seconds in dead silence then said "you just got knocked down a full letter grade. Any other smart asses? Didn't think so." and pushed up his glasses with his index finger.

I remember telling myself this guy will either be super successful or kill himself.

Phenomenal pasta, always invites a hearty chuckle from your old friend Greg Berrycone

Who the fuck is Greg Berrycone?

He can still be hunted to fill Inuit bellies in Alaska thanks to recent endagered species status not being invoked.

Consider the Walrus

>he's surrounded by water
d...damn

It's a joke you nong, he means Beg Gerrycone.

I will never not laugh at the greatly deserved ridicule of this hack fraud. DFW will be remembered by posterity as the most incompetent snake oil salesman western literature has ever produced.

The only sincere act of his life was when he kicked away the chair. His life was nothing but a series of ironies and lies predicated on the the joke that is new sincerity. The big punchline was the creaking of the rafter and the piss trickling down his leg to the floor.

his epiphany that the only viable thing for him to do was to kill himself was the best thing to happen to literature in 30 years since he began writing because behind all the self aware gimmicks and self help books and the drugs and the audience pussy there was no discernible talent

Get back to the big sleep, Bloom. You and DFW can duke it out in the afterlife forevermore.

I love you DFW get!

David...easy on the fish.

No, you are mistaken, you mean Geg Berrycore

Sorry user, it was a typo, as I'm sure yours was, unfortunately! Surely we are both talking about the one and the same Reg Regcybore?

...

very cool

seriously underrated post, I've spit on the screen with the laugh.
Even the choice of the font is perfect.

>I remember telling myself this guy will either be super successful or kill himself.

You got me, congrats.

Holy fucking kek

Okay Bret with one T, settle down, it's not his fault that you and all your tweets and shit books have already been forgotten.