TFW not creative

>tfw your high school fiction assignments were your artistic peak

I was raised by a single mother no it's not

So was I. She was absent weekends and evenings, as well. Not gonna lie it fucked me up, destroyed our family, and I resent her for it.

Yes, it is your fault you didn't go to school. The sooner you admit this the sooner you can start taking responsibility for other things too.

Damn. I feel really bad for kids raised this way. What's your relationship to your biological father like?

>tfw have not written even one (1) bar of music since 2013

Just read up on psilocybin, take it as safely as possible (if possible in the presence of an experienced sitter or at least a trusted friend), and start over.

It also helos with depression and anxiety if you do it correcly.

I look exactly like him.

Dad walked out when I was 2, he left the state dodging child support. The books he left behind were my treasures and got me into reading. Saw him once when I was 14 when he came to pick up some papers. We went for pizza. Mom kind of flipped out and was wearing lipstick trying to get back with him despite having kids in tow by the woman he left her for. Mom has basically been a low-key nutjob my entire life, but I still count her as a blessing. Never saw my father again until my 20s when he was a skeleton dying of cancer in hospice. I was in the room when he died a month later. Cried my eyes out because I would never be able to make him understand what his abandonment did to me. His widow shoved $400 in my hand, said my father wanted me to have it -- "it's not right what happened to him" -- and went back to my life.

Just now coming to grips with being half-spic white trash. I should have robbed a liquor store or shot myself by now. Mid-30s, ex-Army, seen lots of terrible shit. I've resolved to never marry or have children.

>experienced sitter

You don't want this, people who are experienced sitters are always weird hippies who will try to use the trip to brainwash you into Buddhism or whatever.

>inb4 nice blog faggot

You didn't have to read it, numbnuts.

>tfw creative but procrastinator and suck at writing prose
>have to stick to write scripts

What are you afraid of user? Surely you've had some inspired bits of music wander into your mind... r-right?

>Surely you've had some inspired bits of music wander into your mind... r-right?
haha... yeah... haha... all the time bro... haha...

tfw so uncreative have literally no idea what it's like to come up with stories and characters. When I read books and stuff I cannot fathom how they ever came up with the stories, characters, world, situations, etc. Feels bad man.

This was me. Now I'm a shitty writer. I depend on people like you, user, and OP. Don't ever change.

>>desu
>being a newfag
baka desu senpai

Creativity is overrated. All the best books are all the same old stories told as well as they can be.

craft, structure, knowledge, and work ethic is much more important than creativity or lol "talent"

>lol "talent"

>tfw going through older work from when I started out
>over time everything gets technically more proficient but generally worse

>tfw creative

can i give you a hug user

you should look on choosing to study STEM as a good thing. Honestly the people I know who have only ever read fiction and maybe literary philosophy (i.e. not philosophy that has math involved) can be really fucking dumb. But yeah I agree STEM can suck.

>sell-out, hack, fraud
>christopher nolan megafan

>tfw people have always called me creative
>make music, art, writing, shitposts etc.
>spread myself too thin and I'm shit at all of them
I love them all and I'm still doing it
Just wonder if it will be worth it one day...

natural born creativity and talent are memes, kid. 90% of clowns on this born claim themselves as creative geniuses who will never get anywhere because other people just dont get them or holding them back or some other such shit. but 99% of all the writing in the critique threads are 100% absolute SHIT. writing is a skill that you learn, develop, and improve not something you are just born to do like you're in some stupid movie. all you cunts are kidding yourself with your trash prose and unwillingness to learn the actual craft of writing.

>tfw extremely creative.
>tfw no artistic, musical or writing skill.
>Actively hate making things even though whenever I do I often impress both myself and others with my own creativity.
I literally just spend 90% of my time thinking about cool shit I will literally never be able to do. It's like a mentally disabled retard with complete self awareness but the inability to change.

>tfw reasonably creative but shit work ethic (ADHD tier)

>creativity only exists in liberal arts

Damn, this is really close to my story too.

FUCK

>wrote a script that moved everyone who's read it
>there are a fuckload of people in my undergrad filmmaking department who want to be on my project
>expected to direct this thing
>have a vision in my head but no fucking clue how to direct a goddamn film since I'm just starting out
> professors and department heads catch wind
>have looked at the material and want me to enter it into school competitions and film festivals
>all of these expectations bearing down on an inexperienced dumb fuck like me

I am as excited as I am terrified.

Most important part is to just go through with it my dude. If you pussy out the regret will hurt worse than trying and failing. If it ends up going no where then you're life keeps going on. Your happiness should never be contingent on getting lucky.

Shoulder your burdens with pride, user.

>~suffiecient => ~neccessary

Oh I'm going for it. Like I said, I'm both shitting myself out of fear and excitement. I think the key for anyone new to directing is to surround yourself with creative and technically knowledgeable people while still maintaining reasonable control over your creative vision. If people know you're a new film student and you're upfront about your level of experience, everything will be ok. There's also the added element that it's the type of story somebody reads and realizes an author can only write it well if they've experienced the events themselves. With that, there's an added component of vulnerability which makes this whole process really crazy.

if the script itself is that good just make the film simple and driven by the script

>tfw creative but have suppressed the urges to make because 'it's not a real job'
>tfw being creative is my life purpose but I'm deathly afraid of failure

I know this feel.

You can become creative. You probably don't feel comfortable in your skin yet, which is keeping you from finding your voice and releasing it onto the page. Work harder, read more, cut out distracting things from your life, eat better, dress better, feel better, etc.

...

That means you're a normal person.

I wouldn't envy creative people. They're creative because they're mentally ill weirdos who can only express themselves through their art. Despite any success they gain artistically, they usually lead pretty miserable lives and eventually kill themselves.

I don't want to be normal. The thought that I don't have a grand purpose literally causes existential dread in me.

Why would being normal exclude having a grand purpose?

Protip: want to know what your grand purpose is? Pick one.

The grand purpose I've picked is writing and I honestly don't have a great passion for anything else in the same way, but every time I write something it feels so mediocre.

Your problem is that you are writing for some kind of glory and not because you love to write. You can still be a writer, but maybe not a creative writer. Maybe writing non-fiction, journalism, etc. for a bulletin you admire would be a better fit for you.

it's called fucking practice. no one is born good at anything. put in some fucking real effort if you want to git gud

So?

there's plenty of successful mediocre, and even shitty writers.

it's not about success, it's about creating something that's interesting

interesting to whom?

You think successful mediocre writers have no fans at all?

>tfw creative but so critical of yourself that you literally cannot let yourself write something in full

I think the key difference with successful writers (whether they're hacks or not) and your average English teacher writing a novel is the former have immense belief in themselves. They don't start trashing their work before they've even finished a draft. If you do that how can you get anything done?

I think you're actually way wrong. Read about famous author's personal lives and tell me they were supremely confident.

They were just as critical, or more so, as anyone. They just did it, while most don't.

this means you're somewhat intelligent. If people say you're intelligent but you don't think so, you're probably right next to the bell curve, on the intelligent side.

Only absolute morons and absolute geniuses think they're actually intelligent. And news flash: most fall into the former.

Well obviously they are self-critical, I wasn't suggesting otherwise. I think in those cases they are self-critical in retrospect. I've read of a multitude of different creative people writing something, and then looking back at it with scorn. Reverie by Debussy is a great song, but apparently he was so ashamed of it he hoped it would never be released to the public.

Imagine being that grossly over-critical of something you're writing while you're in the process of writing it. That's what i have to deal with, can't get fucking anything done.

write about it, user

you’re just a brainlet, like the kids who think they have all these great ideas for video games and don’t get past that phase

if you haven’t found a medium for expressing your creativity by now user, it’s a lost cause. spending so much time meditating on how creative you’d be if you had the tools means you don’t understand what compels you to create and thus haven’t found the medium

also what the fuck does it even mean to be “creative” if you have no medium for it? what are your “creative” ideas? business ideas? study entrepreneurship. story ideas? write or direct. visual inspiration? go into art

i dont understand how you can consider yourself creatice without a mode of expression and if you really do youre likely delusional

>Imagine being that grossly over-critical of something you're writing while you're in the process of writing it

Most writers are, though.

>That's what i have to deal with, can't get fucking anything done.

No, that's not why.

>No, that's not why.

Okay then, tell me why.

No, you tell you why.

interesting to me and interesting to people of taste

So you want to write what you can't write, and will accept nothing else, and you are fully committed to writing?

And...you don't see a problem here?

I'm not ready to give up on the idea that someday I'll be able to do it

well you might want to change something in that equation, because it's cyclical and non functioning.

How would you know? Improvement is often a slow and arduous process