Roman empire circa 1st century

user... stop trying so hard to be bobby badass

I wouldn't say that, but you can if you like.

>Who is Henry IV and why did he walk to Canossa

Yes, there is much about the Bible that fits pretty squarely into the "you couldn't make this shit up" category. For instance, the whole God-is-flawless-but-He-created-this-miserable-world thing. It's so absurd that I can't imagine that people just sort of made it up and decided it sounded okay to them.
>inb4 but everyone was dumber back then
No.

>i felt pain once, thus God doesn't real
t. pleb

Confirmation of Jesus in the Talmud
>youtube.com/watch?v=wTEptbMVbAk

Yom Kippur 1944: The Conversion of Israel Zolli, Chief Rabbi of Rome
>youtube.com/watch?v=mZ1cr3L9UeM

Jewish Prophecies of the Coming of the Messiah (Rabbi Judah Ben Samuel, aka 'The Light of Israel')
>youtube.com/watch?v=nSzMUF2AIY4
>"The precondition for answered prayer is that it is fueled by enthusiasm and joy for the greatness and holiness of God"

The History of Church Relations with the Jews given at the Oratory, London, 2017
>youtube.com/watch?v=f-WX0YEqhR8

>You literally can't make this stuff up.
but they did anyway

>taking the gospels at 100% face value
no
>greeks think he's comically flawed for a God
The earliest gentile converts were Greeks, a divine miracle-man wasn't outlandish at the time. There was no monolithic Greek mode of thought in any case, Paul indicates that the first gentile communities encompassed different walks of life, most people weren't philosophers.

Really, a charismatic, fanatical dude (which Paul seems to have been) getting converts to a new religion is not beyond imagination in the slightest. Further, being an "absurd" story applies to many religions and religious movements. There are still followers of Sabbatai Zevi even though he converted to Islam. Speaking of Islam, a guy claiming he was teleported to Jerusalem by an angel and that he had a direct line to God and that he saw the moon get cut in half, and died of old age after raiding a few cities and becoming a minor desert tribal leader, becoming one of the largest and most influential religions ever... isn't that an absurd story?
>le spread by the sword
And Christianity was initially spread by pax Romana and a nutcase who never met Jesus but said he was told to be one of the top apostles in a vision. And if Christianity in the Americas and sub-Saharan Africa wasn't spread "by the sword" I don't know what was. Both religions are absurd.

>an amalgam of writings and rewritings over thousands of years is absurd

no one person just went and made christianity up. that's precisely why it's extremely retarded. it's an ageless version of that game where people start with a word and whisper it through a chain of ears and it ends up being some unrelated gibberish

>jews think he can't be the messiah cause he's unheroic and his teachings are blasphemous

(This is gonna take 3 posts to respond to to bear with me)

The main problem jews have/had with Jesus of Nazareth was that he didn't fufill the criteria of what the proposed Jewish/True Messiah would/should do out of a pure nature AND a host of other things.

IMO the actual messiah of destiny and proposed saviour of mankind is more like Maitreya, the future buddha said to take over the job from Gautama, in that

he saves/unites the world, but nobody notices until many a decade later, because he didn't make a huge deal out of it and died unknown. Hence, the fame of Jesus makes me think that the story is like Final Fantasy 7 (spoilers for a ps1 game) if anything and the Jewish Messiah really did redeem mankind in the eyes of God around 0bc BUT was literally so down to earth and based (Zack) that he gave all the credit to/brainwashed Jesus (Cloud) into thinking he was the messiah/saviour because he deduced it better that this otherwise unexceptional shmuck popularize his efforts so they don't go to waste.

Jewish tradition and of all things Islam both actually speak that there are TWO future saviours of mankind.

>Jewish tradition alludes to two redeemers, both of whom are called mashiach and are involved in ushering in the Messianic age: Mashiach ben David; and Mashiach ben Yosef. In general, the term Messiah unqualified refers to Mashiach ben David (Messiah, son of David).

Jesus is likely the descendant of Joseph, but ultimately I think that we missed our shot at true redemption circa 0bc because the Davidic born Messiah was a no show.

But why two messiahs ? looking to Islam:

>the Mahdi (Arabic: مهدي, ISO 233: mahdī "guided one") is the prophesied redeemer of Islam
>ʿĪsā ibn Maryam (Arabic: عيسى بن مريم, lit. 'Jesus, son of Mary'), or Jesus, is understood to be the penultimate prophet and messenger of God (Allah) and al-Masih, the Arabic term for Messiah (Christ), sent to guide the Children of Israel (banī isrā'īl in Arabic) with a new revelation: al-Injīl (Arabic for "the Gospel").
>According to Islamic tradition, the Mahdi's tenure will coincide with the Second Coming of Jesus Christ (Isa), who is to assist the Mahdi against the Masih ad-Dajjal (literally, the "false Messiah" or Antichrist).

=Born of the Davidic line=================
I am Jewish myself, and let me tell how unremarkable 90% of Jews are. Fuck, they are straight up only slightly preferable to ass cancer. People have these

stereotypes, like "Asians are good at math" when in reality it is more like "If you were take the top 1% from every race, you would find that the top 1% of

Asians are remarkable at mathematics." Fun fact, the top brain surgeons are often black thanks to Basketball tier hand eye coordination. Every negative

stereotype has its reason, but people really like to embellish/hype that for some reason, because all of the Chinese you have met outside of China are good

at math, the entire nation of China must have some proclivity for math. The Asians you've probably met got out of Nip Nog Nang because they see as much

bucktoothed rednecks as you do, and thought "Fuck this shit, praise be to Al Jabra."

My point is that people apply this roundabout thinking to the Jewish population as well, and this sterotype that Jews are really smart does actually have

some truth to it: The difference is that instead of the top 1% of this race being worth giving a shit about, it is instead more like the top 10% of Jews are

exceptional.

I am not saying that Jesus was not born of the Davidic line from what I know about the story of David (the sling of stones he holds is a metaphor for

gripping his testicles, representing a kind of over the top frugality/concern for his offspring, and Goliath was actually based off the genetic diseases of

Acromelagy/Gigantism where the body and brain overall lack health blood circulation = perceived stupidity a la Michael Phelps who has claimed he struggles

to understand higher concepts like space time etc because his swim god physique composed of big hands and flipper feet drain are a significant drain on his

brainpower.)
Jewish males born of the Davidic line are like the top 1% of this already exceptional top 10%. On the nature side of things, they have the brainpower, but

also, physique, and spiritual proclivity and tactical prowess. Nurture/byproducts of society wise they have a genuine, almost motherly love of mankind. In

society, they seek justice and change benefiting the meek, the poor, the outcast.
Jesus actually fits the bill here despite the fact the average Rabbinowitz would implore you reconsider.

reasons/legitimate problems Jesus may have not been the messiah

Jesus didn't build the Third Temple, thus following/replacing the First, Solomon's Temple, and Second (Both were destroyed, the Western wall is a remnant of

the Second)

Nowadays, I don't think the third temple would be an actual temple, but rather some kind of Internet based superstructure that would unite all mankind.
I think Elon Musk's proposed "database that would store and preserve human consciousness" could be this.

Lastly, why I personally think that Jesus was not the proposed Messiah:
The brief stories that mention him, are by themselves, far cooler than the entire collective acts of Christs in the NewTestament.

>R. Joshua b. Levi met Elijah standing by the entrance of R. Simeon b. Yohai's tomb. He asked him: "Have I a portion in the world to come?" He replied, "if this Master desires it." R. Joshua b. Levi said, "I saw two, but heard the voice of a third." He then asked him, "When will the Messiah come?" — "Go and ask him himself," was his reply. "Where is he sitting?" — "At the entrance." "And by what sign may I recognise him?" — "He is sitting among the poor lepers: all of them untie [them] all at once, and rebandage them together, whereas he unties and rebandages each separately, [before treating the next], thinking, should I be wanted, [it being time for my appearance as the Messiah] I must not be delayed [through having to bandage a number of sores]." So he went to him and greeted him, saying, "Peace upon thee, Master and Teacher." "Peace upon thee, O son of Levi," he replied. "When wilt thou come, Master?" asked he. "Today," was his answer. On his returning to Elijah, the latter enquired, "What did he say to thee?" — "peace Upon thee, O son of Levi," he answered. Thereupon he [Elijah] observed, "He thereby assured thee and thy father of [a portion in] the world to come." "He spoke falsely to me," he rejoined, "stating that he would come today, but has not." He [Elijah] answered him, "This is what he said to thee, To-day, if ye will listen to his voice."

and (This one should give you some hope given the age we're living in)
>The son of David will come only in a generation that is either altogether righteous or altogether wicked. in a generation that is altogether righteous, — as it is written, "Thy people also shall be all righteous: they shall inherit the land for ever." Or altogether wicked, — as it is written, "And he saw that there was no man, and wondered that there was no intercessor;" and it is [elsewhere] written, "For mine own sake, even for mine own sake, will I do it."

>ITS THE CURRENT YEAR
you know the days and months are "pagan" origin right?

Was CS Lewis the ultimate brainlet? Did TS Eliot ever btfo him? They were contemporaries after all.

What kind of fucking drugs are you taking?
That was just a gigantic, nearly incoherent rambling of vaguely connected concepts that don't at all point to a conclusion of any kind.

The Aristocrats!

Nah that was adderamblling