I’m about to order Chinese food, what dishes should I get?

I’m about to order Chinese food, what dishes should I get?

potstickers
hot and sour soup
beef broccoli
mushu pork

Crab rangoon

D-dog haha xD

Chicken and sweetcorn soup
Spring rolls
Crispy Duck
Barbecue pork ribs
Sweet and sour pork
Egg fried rice

this x100

The special. Whatever it is.

Twice cooked pork.

Plates, bowls, cups, and some silverware

duck tongues

General Tso's shrimp and scallops.

crab rangoon.

I second potstickers, crab rangoon, mushu or sweet and sour pork, or spring rolls. Other suggestions would be shrimp fried rice if the place has them of decent size, egg drop soup if it doesn't taste chemically, thai basil beef if not gummy, or broccoli in any sauce.

sweet and salty crabbed rang boon

Peking duck
Pot stickers
Shrimp toast

Kung Pao chicken
Either Black pepper or Mongolian beef
I usually like the seafood combination soup with sizzling rice
Chow mein with whatever meat of your choice

>mfw nobody said egg foo yung
that shit is the greatest thing ever.

Ching chong ding dong

General Tsos and Chicken and broccoli is how I gauge any new Chinese joint
Can’t go wrong with a $7.99 lunch special (rice usually included) with either a soup or egg roll, meal of choice, and a can of soda

My nigger

One of the local places around me has a pic related on yelp of a peking duck someone ordered that looked like it passed through an incinerator. $30 as the typical price is stupid too, I'd rather make it myself or buy confit and duck breasts.

Hope you don't get any roachies or metal shavings, they're pretty common from just about every chink place around me. The ones that don't have reviews with proof it's because no one has realized yet I'm sure.

>Lo mein
>Egg roll/spring roll
>Fried rice
>Any chicken thats not sweet

Clams with black bean sauce
Stuffed tofu
Pork buns
Pea pod leaves
Steamed fish with ginger and scallions

It's also a good way to gauge a Chinese restaurant. If they do egg foo young really well, they probably know what they're doing. There's a lot of mediocre EFY out there.

I feel that General Tso's is one of the worst litmus tests. Breading and thick sugarsauce cover a multitude of sins. I also like to try the hot and sour soup. If they take the time to give a shit about their soup, you can probably trust the rest of the menu.

Came here to post something similar, thank you based literal-user.

My fuckers. I sometimes want to call up my Chinese place, and just order like 50 Rangoons. I did it when I was drunk and high before, but generally I get self-conscious now, so I just order a few dishes and get a few rangoons as well. I guess I should just go to a buffet at that point, and just eat all the rangoons, wait for them to refill, eat again, ad nauseam.

But the one time I ordered like 35 rangoons and just ate them while watching TV was based.

But for real orders:
Orange Beef, fried rice, rangoon, eggroll
Kung Pao Chicken, chow mein, rangoon, eggroll

So based bruh lol

It actually was though. I know it sounds degenerate, but it was really great.

Szechuan Beef
Pork Fried Rice
Crab Rangoon
Eggrolls (if the place makes their own)

> if going to a chinese buffet
Fried Calimari

Also forgot to add
Potstickers < Dumplings

and you need to find a place that makes egg rolls that look like this rather than the kind you get from the freezer

>General Tso's is one of the worst litmus tests
>Breading and thick sugarsauce cover a multitude of sins
This is true, but when it's good it's really good. When it's not good, it's noticeable.
>hot and sour soup
Also a good indication

Chicken with eggplant and some dumplings

Probably gonna get that tonight myslf

singapore noodles

I'm having Chinese food tonight too! General Tso's chicken!

Kek you sound like such a faggot yelp reviewer. I bet you think your pallet is just so goddamn refined huh?

>Breading and thick sugarsauce cover a multitude of sins

It covers a multitude of delicious shit. I understand what you're saying.

Sometimes though, you just want something that tastes really good, despite it not being "true" or "authentic". I get that.

You can like both. I sometimes do want some fried chicken and syrup. And some fried cream cheese and crab extract, too. Tastes good, feels good, man.

Singapore noodles have always been lame everywhere I've tried them. I lived in Singapore for awhile and I've never seen anything called "Singapore noodles" there. Everywhere else they just add turmeric to rice noodles + throw in wok'd veggies and chicken. Not bad, but pretty mediocre.

>pallet

>tumeric
it should be curry powder, with cabbage, onion, shrimp and ham
and yeah its not a Singaporean dish, its a Hong Kong dish

oh and egg

At first I thought this was some kinda loaf with spinach in it until I zoomed in