Sorry, you took too long in the restroom so we ordered for you

yeah we're not gonna wait till we're halfway through our meal for you to come back, try to flag down our server, get your food then try to wolf it down fast enough we aren't waiting on you. have some consideration fucko, this is why no one ever invites you anywhere

I don't care, cousin. Your mom forced you to invite me, now you have to deal with me.

no it was your mom fucko, and I'm not dealing with shit. *drops napkin on plate* I'm out, have fun finding a way home oh and you ARE paying for your food whether you like it or not. *walks away, pays my part of bill, and drives off*

>thanks but this is a small order of fries and a lot of sauce, did some of you take some?
>wheres the waitress I need to order more fries

3.2/10

Wow. What an insufferable egotrip you are. No wonder everyone in the office hates you.

Jesus, did you get me any food with my condiments?

it's fine, that's pretty much what I wanted anyway

What's a village inn?

Shitty pizza joint

YOU KNOW I NEED THREE CUPS OF RANCH YOU STUPID FUCKS WHERES THE THIRD ONE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

well I work with a bunch of autists like you so I don't really give a shit if y'all like me

No its a diner and what you see is called a chicken ranch its fried chicken cheese and bacon and you dip it in the ranch and its fucking elder god tier

Those fries look terrible.

They are shit but the sandwich is very good

>doing this shit when you're 100% sure to see the person again within a few hours
someone's looking to get punched right in the fucking mouth, I don't even care if it's in front of everyone

How are those buns made that they look so fucking weird and fake

Looks fine besides the fries being soggy, how long was the bathroom trip or theirs from the frier?

They are delicious buns desu

How not to have friends.

Who the fuck goes to a restaurant and shits, let alone shits before they order, especially when they are with company?

This. I haven't shit in a public toilet since childhood.

I only shit at home.

You must be wrong. As you get older this becomes less of an option. I wont even go for a walk in the park without a roll of TP in my backpack, after an unfortunate incident where I had to shit in the woods and wipe myself with leaves.

Meant "young"not "wrong." Still waking up..

What a cry baby you are.
Saying yall doesn't make you country either.

What happened to you? Did you get molested in a public bathroom or something?

>poops in public
>can't speak correctly
Do you need to be in a home?

Just carry tissues. People won't automatically associate them with crap when they see it, you can use them to blow your nose or wipe grease off your hands, and if necessary they can function as TP.

at least you have friends to eat out with and to order food for you

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Straight into the feels

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"This isn't what I told you to order for me before I went to the bathroom steve, this is why nobody wants to hang out with you"

i get the same thing but my therapist called it 'napkin panic'.

Mom, this is why I hate it when you tell me I have to invite him along

>this surly cunt being invited to go out to eat with others in the first place

>I ate in the restroom

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my therapist calls it "I hate you for employing me as your miserable therapist and I pray for you to open up those veins in your forearm and sleep the sleep of the damned" ;(

I always thought she looked kinda sad.

>wow, i have to pee and the waiter still isn't here. i guess i'll excuse myself for a moment.

I'm just imagining this autsimo trying to explain to girls why he always has a roll of TP on him.

No, I just don't find it comfortable to shit in a public place.

At home it's relaxing and even an enjoyable experience. Not to mention the fact that my own bathroom is actually clean, unlike public restrooms.

But yes, I enjoy coming home and immediately going to the bathroom to relieve my bowels. All while daydreaming and thinking about life, what i'm having for dinner tonight, etc.

Perhaps you should see a doctor, or look into your diet.

Fuck off boomer

>Just carry tissues bro
Oh yeah so then people can think he's a chronic masturbator instead of a sufferer of chrons disease

Dammit you guys, how did you know I only wanted condiments?

Think about what you just wrote. Do you see people blowing their nose or wiping their hands with tissues and automatically conclude that they are a chronic masturbator?

ba bum tsssh

Well you have to make friends with him because he is going to be your brother in law in a few months.

That is far too much sauce.

>t EU

but really the EU now banned the sale of fries darker than Golden Yellow

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Objectively not true

get the fuck back to lucan

I can't believe you live in constant fear of shitting yourself

To clarify, the park I walk in is mostly rural and very large. It's hiking really. Whenever I go out there I take emergency supplies in my backpack. Water, first aid, a bit of food, and yes TP. Also I have only shit in the woods that one time, I just like to be prepared in case it happens again.

this tbqh

why are you lying about such trivial things?

because the EU is still spending money on studies and the politicians discussing over trivial things as fries earning hundreds of thousand euros.
while poor people have to fight for food with refugees at food aid centers.

Why do we let them get away with this?

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how bad must that food be to be served with that much dip

I can manually make all three of those dips, but you need 2 dedicated penitentiary masturbators to make the first.