"Oh user thank you so much for cooking this"

"Oh user thank you so much for cooking this"

What do you cook for your lady friends?

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Cyanide

Don't bother cooking shit, just throw some fresh fruit and alcohol in a blender. They'll think it's fancy and they'll get drunk.

idk, I've only had boyfriends over. For family events, I've learned to pretend I'm cooking for toddlers so *those* women don't complain.

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Shat out some Ramsay eggs for a dentist recently, she said they were the best she'd ever eaten.

I don't even know what this means.

Are even the homosexuals misogynists now?

I cook everyday for my wife of six years because I get home earlier than she does.

Usually some kind of broiled or baked chicken or pork chops during the week, a pasta and sausage night, do a cheap salad day. Wish I could cook fish more often but its expensive. Also chicken fajitas, sometimes carnitas or beef instead. Chili. Tend to keep it easy and quick.

Eggplant parm when I have extra time to do all that nonsense work.

cuck

yeah right, this roastie has taken miles of dick, no way I'm wasting my time on her

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also you realize you're literally placing your free time above hers

just because your shift ends earlier doesn't mean you didn't have to fucking work just like she did

so you not only had to wake up earlier but then after work have to come home and slave over a hot stove

and what exactly does she do to equal out this relationship?

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Jesus Christ, maybe he enjoys cooking. Or maybe she does the cleaning.

You're implying that I have to wake up earlier than her. She's a teacher and she gets up at 5AM and I work from home a third of the week.

Its not skin off my back to do some cooking.

Also I'm a better cook as it is so I don't mind making my mind.

Also you it is immature if you think that every relationship is an equal give and take 100% of the time.

>cook some fine food bitches should love
>They don't like it
>Cook the same thing the same way for a guy
>Gets a boner for it being so good
>Half ass effort for some bitch
>Gets mad at me for being a half assed cheap cunt
>Do the same for a guy
>He ain't complaining but he sure is hungry
Women just want wine and expensive shit they can talk about and show off instead of actually appreciating and eating it.
Men just want to eat like a sane person

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maybe stop dating horrible women

he specifically justified his cuckholding being that he "happens to get home from his 8 hour day before she does"

not that he LOVES COOKING

Bitches should appreciate a man that can cook let alone cook whatever the fuck they ask for

Tomboys are rare so if I find one I'm gonna keep em. Tomboys are men brains in women bodies which means my food should give her the biggest boner she's ever had

...

He never said he didn't. Nor did he mention how the chores are shared.

Angry /pol/ and /r9k/fags please go.

>literally 4 lines of soyboy apologetic male privilege guilt

holy shit you sound like boogie2988 after his divorce

cant wait for u to tell us all how the woman deserves 50% (Even tho she isnt required to provide 50% during the time within the relationship)

Something light so she isn't farting and shitting when I'm railing her later.

>Are even the homosexuals misogynists now?
>now
Lmao@urlife

all that shit was after the fact when his male guilt kicked in

HE STATED AND I QUOTE

"I cook everyday for my wife of six years because I get home earlier than she does."

not one fucking word of I LOVE TO COOK

he QUALIFIED the reason he is the one in the relationship who COOKS EVERY FUCKING DAY FOR SIX YEARS is simply "i get home before her"

he didnt say "i work at home" he said "gets home earlier"

Why are angry /pol/ and /r9k/fags still here?

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>Also you it is immature if you think that every relationship is an equal give and take 100% of the time.

you literally just said the full fucking six years of your life YOU are the one doing ALL the cooking

pretty sure that's fucking exactly 100%

theres a word for sluts who have men who do something for them every day without asking and nothing additional from them given in return (or even asked for or assumed to be given)

Pathetic faggot. I cook for my girlfriend because I am the protector and I am the provider. I keep her alive because one day she will bear and take care of my children. Cooking is a valuable skill and I get to practice it every day. Enjoy your oven baked tendies and instant noodles.

Chicken parm or carbonara has worked on every single date thusly.

>he doesn't even have kids yet
it keeps getting better

>lady friends
>friends
Implying an alpha like me gets put in the friendzone.

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40% chocolate is too bitter for them.

>girlfriend

so now not your wife?

or did you initially refer to your girlfriend of 6 years because YOU think of her more of the relationship than she does

jesus fucking christ is this one of those relationship comedies where the cucked friend has no idea hes a cuck and his male friends keep trying to tell him

Make all kinds of shit for my GF when we don't go out to eat

Made this valentines day (well, the sunday before). Was a beautiful meal. Afterwards I got super high and we laid down to watch The Babadook. When the movie ended I was ready to pass out and go to sleep all full and stoned, but she had other plans. She started going down stairs, and I was thinking "No! Noooo! I just want to sleep" then she started her meeting with the Bishop and his Clergymen and I thought "#MeToo" and busted up laughing mid BJ. She got so upset that she went outside for a smoke, came back in crying, grabbed her stuff and left lol.

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It's two different couples.

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"Nice guy," 100% guaranteed. Desperate for any kind of love or affection but your repulsive personality will always drive 'em away. Then you try to make yourself feel better by dumping on any woman that doesn't fit your anime waifu ideal of a subservient blowjob machine.

Why do you think they're homosexuals?

>one day she will bear and take care of Chad's children
ftfy

>when he think's he's won the intellectual battle but he can't keep all the comments straight when two different people are responding to him.

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Mix alfredo pasta with frenchs honey mustard, blended walnuts philadelphia cream cheese couple processed chese slices and some croutons, a sprinkle of dried cranberries, generous portion of shrimp, garlic powder and cumin, top it with sandwich sliced raw onion and parm

>wanting a whore that i have to cook for when i can just fap to the new batch of cunny always coming into celebrity rotation, any time of day as many times of day as i please

>Being a virgin.

I'm a different poster. Keep expanding that soyboy rage.

Holy shit, lol. That's your argument? That's top tier pathetic.

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>resorting to ad hominems

the moment you realize they're seething

>Implying
You would be surprised how many gays despise women. Ive been with my wife a decade, 4 years of it married. When you stop chasing women and step back you start to see some shit thats hidden by the lust blinders straight men have.

>implying I'm even mad at all at some dumb /r9k/ 16 year old.

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just keep out of my gay bars on your "girls night out" and you're okay with me

maybe stop fucking men you complete and utter degenerate

Where do you think we are?

Do you cook for your wife’s bull too?

very well, carry on

What a terrible story. Please neck yourself.

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>When the bachelorette party shows up

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Sometimes you just wanna go to bed.

What a fag.

why did you decide to be a gay, user?

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You should have at least added a donkey punch to that story.

>"good" "guys"
Why are they never self conscious?

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Women are trash. I only cook for traps and trannies.

>not only cooking for your Dad
Fucking fag neck yourself soyo

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She's the type of gal who'd be into that but I'm not that type of guy

t. Nice guy thats nice until he realizes hes in the friend zone

Cooking for women huh, that' a laugh. I've been with my wife for 10 years now. We met in high school, and I got her pregnant. She is and always has been a lazy person and a shit cook. I wouldn't even mind eating shit food if she at least made it on time. But she rarely did.

We'd get into screaming arguments constantly about how lazy and worthless she was. I felt like an asshole for it, but goddamn she was a real piece of work. The only reason I dealt with all this was for the kids, and also because the sex is great.

But one night, I got fed up. Not only did she get drunk, neglect the kids, and made me top Ramen for dinner, but she decided to give me attitude too. She was being real fucking bitchy. So I told my grandparents to keep an eye on the kids and told my wife we were going to go out and have dinner together.

I drove maybe 3 blocks to a quiet area (we live in Oregon, it's not hard to find a quiet field) and I got out of the car, went around like I was going to open her door for her and let her out, and I just beat the shit out of her while she was still seatbelted. After a few punches, I asked her if she wanted to go back to her parents. She started screaming and yelling and said yes, so I beat the shit out of her again. Then I asked her what she wanted to do. She finally got smart and said she wanted to go home. So I took her home and dared her to start trouble. I even handed her my cellphone and dialed her mom's number on the drive home. I made her talk to her mom, while daring her to fucking say something.

Before that incident, I had never laid a hand on her. But I had always threatened it. I told her "one of these days, if you don't straighten up, I'm going to lay hands on you." All my meals have been on time, and she just recently tried to make a meatloaf. It was mediocre, but I was just thrilled that she tried.

Do with this information what you will.

>Wish I could cook fish more often but its expensive

Pollacks are good for more than just toilet cleaning. Frozen pollack is cheap and wild caught. Just don't fall for the fresh(-ly thawed) meme and you can have decent fish for cheap.

That does not sound like a good marriage.

Idk man sounds like a pretty common solution. Ive seen like 30 anons say it worked for them

Interesting, thanks for giving some personal insight on the matter

FUCK YES BRO, i hope this isnt pasta

good on you, i seriously want to shake your hand firmly and buy you a beer

>can’t get a qt3.14 trap gf

I cook whatever we're having for dinner that night

unless it's her night to cook

sometimes we cook together

Last thing I cooked for my GF was potato chowder (made with pureed roasted rudabaga and parsnip) and seared marinated king oyster mushroom medallions with a side of buttered pasta

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that dish looks faggy af

This picture kek. I hope the kid is about to start popping off some moves

Looks like a nice meal desu

faget

first time I bring her over for dinner: pan fried ny strip steak on my cast iron, finished with rosemary and butter. establish dominance.
second time she comes over, usually 3rd or 4th date: chicken green curry from scratch with jasmine rice.
I have never not gotten laid on green curry night.

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there is way too much /r9k/ and /pol/ shit happening in this thread, cant you fags stay in your containment boards?

kek

I decided after careful consideration and a lot of R&D.

stale post

Newfags

Welcome to Veeky Forums.

Fuck your "secret club" faggot.

Fuck off roastie. We’re here, we’re queer, get use to it.

Cheeseboards and complex salads are a bullseye every time. My girlfriend eats whatever so I just experiment and she tells me if she likes it or not. Our tastes are similar.

>When the guy you were dancing with turns out to be a bi-slut and leaves with them

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Do you watch while your gf fucks black dudes?

>Bechamel mac and cheese with pinot for littles
>Steak Poivre for thots and basic bitches (its the alcohol fireball)
>Coconut Curry for vegetarians and vegans
>Pork belly ramen for weebs, pork cutlet bowl for full fujoshi. Marinated egg is the keystone
>Pulled pork with my homemade sauce and rub for everyone else
Being told my cooking is good feels 1000x better than anything they could do to my dick.

i don't have any lady friends
actually i don't have any friends

You need to cook for people with better dick skills.

>lady friends

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do you cry at night?

Last thing I made her was a reuben. Been eating the leftovers for the last 3 days, glad she hasn't been around.

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Found the cuck!

I just like cooking man, sex isnt even a part of it u less it ends up going that way. Though I did notice men give better head than women after a couple years

Based.