Got these for Christmas. Which one should I read first?

Got these for Christmas. Which one should I read first?

Swift

You could throw them all away and not have lost anything of value.

Confederacy of Dunces is the funnest

The only real masterpieces there are Alice in Wonderland and Dorian Gray.

If you know nothing about philosophy, start with Will Durant. If you do, still read Durant, and then read Gulliver's Travels. There is also a lot of shit in there, I hope I don't need to tell you which ones are trash.

Read War of the Worlds then Catcher.
If you ever want to read Ringworld Engineers, read Ringworld first. Though R.E. is kind of long, boring and drab when I read it.

Why did you get two copies of the Hobbit and no Fellowship?

trainspotting

My Mom got most of these from this thrift store she volunteers at.

Women "entering" the "workforce" was a mistake. She's implicitly devaluing actual labor to prop up someone else's economic exploits.

The best of John W. Campbell because it reminds me of blue and white shimapan

the hobbit. very comfy christmas reading.

>Implying thats not what a housewife does.
The woman is the proletariat of the man.

You would be correct were it not for the copy of Confederacy of Dunces

woman is the nigger of the world

No way in hell is Dorian G a masterpiece. An enjoyable read but ultimately it's just style without substance. The novella is a pure exercise in aesthetics. Everything under the hood is just a generic morality tale. I'd pick Conrad or Swift over it.

>used books for Christmas

If you're already old enough to post on this imageboard, you should've already read most of the good stuff.
If not, begin with The Epic of Gilgamesh. Go on forwards from there.

Burn them all and then start with the Greeks

Just think about reading them every day but post on Veeky Forums instead like everyone else. Skim through the wiki of them if ever a thread comes up that you want to participate in.

tolkien or joseph campbell seem fine to begin with
leave dorian gray or gulliver's for the end

Burn them all except for Catcher in the Rye. I'm not even joking.