In your best prose, describe this image

In your best prose, describe this image.

The painting looked just like the Mona Lisa

OOO mamma mia the milkers you can't quite see them but you can just tell JUST TELL ** from the volume of the chest they're good little round things now this donna here she'd got that layer of fat showing up at her face but if ya like them soft & plump like them ripe italian pomodoros you'd be right to be thinking things about this mama on this 500 year old painting and the way she looks at ya I swear those hands have done things in the past maybe to one of them Medici boys or who knows no I know there's rumors it's a self-portrait by Leonardo and if it turns to be true I'm a fag but goddamn it! i'd like to be in an orgy in the ruins of Pompeii where everyone is painted golden and torchlight shines upon the pomodoro-sauce-soaked bodies twingled and throbbing and them mamas screaming like cows and hard strong cocks rub agains my skin with desire and I think decadent thoughts and just wait for Vesuvius to burst and climax and turn me into dust again and have it all over with

The painting featured a woman, followed of a dark, surreal landscape.

lost it

Why is it surreal?

why would the read need to know

+we have to admit the landscape in this makes no sense. that's what makes it brilliant.

Why are you guys so afraid of engaging with the painting beyond a reductionist apathic gaze?
Try to imagine how could you transmit one of the most important pieces of the visual arts to someone who is blind, and try again, I belive in you.
At least this guy tried

I'm unable to do that, and I don't think it's possible to reach that goal, therefore I would focus on something else, like the emotional state of the character watching (if it's a fiction, of course).

(I never wrote anything valuable in my whole life)

>why would the read need to know
If he said it was surreal is because the background of the painting makes him recall what he, in his knowledge, recognises as surreal. I just want to know what is it that made him connect that image to what he understands as surreal.

Because everyone knows what the fucking Mona Lisa looks like

Some cunt with a smirk got repeated digits. 4 of em. It was nice.

Not only that, but to describe something that everyone already knows would be fucking masturbation. Not even the greatest writers spend 4 fucking paragraphs describing a cloud. Stephanie Meyer spends a paragraph describing her microwave. Don't be like Stephanie Meyer

It is impossible to absolutly give the blind person the image using language, but try to grasp what that image's essence is, and comunicate it, make it relatable somehow to the soul who can only engage with aesthetics via language. Imagine if Borges had never seen this painting and he asks you what it is, would you just say "a woman with a unique smile in a surreal background"? What would that say to someone blind? Nothing, not what that image really is and you know it. If you don't belive language is at least worth the try of doing this description, what could literature do at all?

Alright bud, why don't you have someone describe a symphony to you; won't fucking work. Music must be heard. Paintings must be seen. Words must be read. You can't paint words anymore than you can sing a painting.

Maybe you can't, but you can try. Proust, in Swanns way, said something like that while he was watching the beatiful gardens, the ones whom's beauty made him happy, created this impression on him as an image, and that thats what some words, arranged in someways, do, carry images to the readers souls (of course this is not what he exactly said, I'm just trying to replicate, with my own words, what Proust transmited to me with his words)
You can describe Debussy's style to people who have not listened to him. Just try, thats all I'm saying. The first and third post were afraid to do it. The second post at least tried, in his own memey style, but he actually engaged with the image and with the read it.

Not everyone knows, there are people in third world countries that have probably literally never seen it, and if they have seen it, they didnt know what they were seeing. Tell them. That painting, without language, would be nothing. The aesthetic phenomenom happens in language.

Jesus christ you faggots can't even try to be actually funny once in a while. All you had to do was write something about a woman in a painting and now you're discussing whether it's possible to "describe" something.
This idiot right here just misses the point completely like what the fuck, do you fags even read? is writing such a chore for you niggers?
It says a lot about the absolute state of lit when the best post in the thread is

OP here, nice to see someone agree. I know asking to describe that painting seems provocative or dishonest or something like that, but I made this thread after reading a little about it, and thought it would be an interesting version of the typical "describe this image in your best prose" thread to make it about something interesting instead of a random beatiful girl or something like that.
Those replies really disappointed me, I didnt expect so little hope in the capacities of language in Veeky Forums. Maybe they are just afraid of using purple prose.
It was just an experiment.

the reader*

Ok guys, what about this, describe the painting in the way you think your favorite prose stylist would do it. Is this better?

she's got a hot ass

Haha really funny

thanks, but I can't take credit

The presence that rose thus so strangely beside the waters, is expressive of what in the ways of a thousand years men had come to desire. Hers is the head upon which all "the ends of the world are come," and the eyelids are a little weary. It is a beauty wrought out from within upon the flesh, the deposit, little cell by cell, of strange thoughts and fantastic reveries and exquisite passions. Set it for a moment beside one of those white Greek goddesses or beautiful women of antiquity, and how would they be troubled by this beauty, into which the soul with all its maladies has passed! All the thoughts and experience of the world have etched and moulded there, in that which they have of power to refine and make expressive the outward form, the animalism of Greece, the lust of Rome, the mysticism of the middle age with its spiritual ambition and imaginative loves, the return of the Pagan world, the sins of the Borgias. She is older than the rocks among which she sits; like the vampire, she has been dead many times, and learned the secrets of the grave; and has been a diver in deep seas, and keeps their fallen day about her; and trafficked for strange webs with Eastern merchants: and, as Leda, was the mother of Helen of Troy, and, as Saint Anne, the mother of Mary; and all this has been to her but as the sound of lyres and flutes, and lives only in the delicacy with which it has moulded the changing lineaments, and tinged the eyelids and the hands. The fancy of a perpetual life, sweeping together ten thousand experiences, is an old one; and modern philosophy has conceived the idea of humanity as wrought upon by, and summing up in itself all modes of thought and life. Certainly Lady Lisa might stand as the embodiment of the old fancy, the symbol of the modern idea.

What did Leonardo mean by this?

She stares into me, her melancholic eyes and slight smile piercing me. The ochre hue that surrounded her was rather unsettling, and the surreal background only stood to reiterate that feeling. I felt simultaneously taken aback, worried, and yet somehow relaxed. I felt calm.

I would not feel validated in enjoying this image unless I knew that this mistress had a penis

This, or simply:
>It was the Mona Lisa

i have a few ideas

...

Faggy but nice. What were your inspirations?

>mona lisa one of the most important artworks

it was beautiful. the way she smilled.

Would dropping out college and working minimum wage for a year or so to go to france only to see this painting irl worth it?

It was an old painting, it showed a woman smiling at me. It was a masterpiece, so I was told by the guide. It did look very real. But it wasn't much fun, I have seen the picture many times already, and it was pretty small. I thought it would be larger.

this desu

HA! PUKE!

Probably not. The closest you can get is about 20 ft away, and it isn't very large. And you have to fight through a crowd of sweaty people (at least if you are there in the summer). It was cool to be in the same room, but kind of a lackluster experience for me. I was there in August of this year.