Tfw a grim, wet day here at the illustrious and world-renowned University of Oxford

>tfw a grim, wet day here at the illustrious and world-renowned University of Oxford
>tfw walking through ancient streets past the Harry Potter-esque buildings alone
>tfw decided to wear my black cape jacket today because it's drizzly, and a dark grey jumper over a white shirt with black pair of cotton trousers and black formal shoes
>tfw seeing my reflection and mistaking it momentarily for Harry Potter
>tfw reminding myself that if there is anywhere magical and Harry Potter-esque on earth (the entire earth) it would be here at Oxford, more specifically the University (of Oxford)
>tfw walked past some senior professors earlier talking in most excited voices about some obscure branch of ancient wisdom
>tfw starting (I think) to get over the fact that my pure, qt, Elite privately educated (~£36,000 fees per year) English Rose girlfriend abandoned me for an upper class Jew
>tfw slow day today so may just spend some time in some quiet corner of the library reading some ancient hardback book about something suitably interesting
>tfw had a dream last night where I was forced to work in a call centre in a large crowded room which had no doors
>tfw realized this was meant to scare me from the idea of leaving university (as I have thought about doing) and working in some prole job to feel less unsettled by my current class anxiety

Will you be studying in the library today at your polytechnic, "uni" or college?

Harry Potter is for children and man children. You deserve all the uncertainty and discomfort for being a tender naive child. No wonder your gf left you. Drop out of uni, become a sparky and make bank.

i haven't left my room in 4 months. my mom brings me food

>Harry Potter-esque
Oxford students in 2018.

>wake up at 9, struggle into clothes so i can make it to campus for my 9:30am
>pouring rain but no time to get a jacket
>get to car, tire is flat even though i filled it up the day before, have to get in on the passenger's side because i was t-boned on driver's side and door will not open, engine stalls as i try to start it up
>get to class five minutes late, everyone looks at me, i'm soaked and dressed like a vagrant
>lecture is completely pointless, as are the next two
>walk five minutes to buy a coffee before realizing i left my wallet at home
>get to car, see i've been ticketed
>drive home, not enough time to buy coffee before
>go in for a 5-hour shift at the grocery store where i work, see a bunch of people who go to my school, hope to god they don't see me
>come home, waste the rest of the night on the internet

>it's okay because i don't have to ever hear anglos cackling in the library while i try to study

I'm from Cambridge and let me guess something. That's your second semester first year undergraduate. Prior to that you've worked your ass off for three years, sacrificing your own family, your health and friendships. You didn't have time establish any genuine connection with any of peers in prime of your life, while other people from your highschool had the best time of their life and the memories made back then will flourish their minds for decades. You did all of that because of a superiority complex mixed with a desperate need for attention and validation. You wanted to become one of these Oxbridge guys that Asian tourist make photos of saying something in their incomprehensible languages. Now you're in. The initial dopamine rush that you got in the first two weeks of Michaelmas ceased. The magic of an ancient city started wearing off in between of making late hours of supervision preparations and essays writing. You barely raise your eyesight anymore while running to lectures. You don't have energy to appreciate genuinely this place. How it can be? You remember how excited you were visiting it as a highschooler. You're disappointed in your peers. You expected debates in elite societies about. You got mostly the same kind of plebs that you despised so hard in the highschool tagging each other under LADbible memes listening to The Weeknd and girls posting photos on instagram with Rupi Kaur's quotes. Formal dinners were fun for first three times. No one is giving you looks for your outfits. For a pair of your Bexley oxfords there is a dozen of guys wearing Crockett&Jones in the same room. For each of your TM Lewin suit that you brought proudly to Oxford there are hundreds from Ede & Ravenscroft here. You're getting depressed. You feel tired all the time. Facebook friends are slowly stopping liking all black tie photos that you're tagged in. But you need validations. So you're posting on Veeky Forums to get some (you)'s from complete strangers and to reassure yourself that it's not that bad and you're still special. You're not, and they're mostly laughing at you.

mother of god

Not OP, but an undergraduate in his first Hillary term studying History at Oxford.
Aside from the part about sacrificing friends, you absolutely nailed it. My expectations for this place were too high and romanticised and most of the people around here provide nothing other than disapointment.

The afternoon is almost upon us, Cambridge friend, and I wish you good afternoon in advance despite the fact that we are sworn enemies! I very much doubt however that my peers experienced a net pleasure that was superior in amount to the net pleasure of my own late teenage years, especially when considering that by the formulation of JS Mill and other Elite geniuses the pleasure I (a profound thinker) experienced while gazing most rapturously upon a swan feeding its young on a chilly day in 2009 is far more valuable and valid than the quote unquote pleasure experienced by my classmate Nick who is rumoured to have bummed a girl from Year 11. Indeed I would argue that the more sensory a pleasure the less enviable it is. I may have spent my life as a back bedroom casualty but even the pleasures I experienced within that room meant more to me than all of the "nights out", "parties", "orgies", "hook ups" etc experienced by my less academic peers. Whether or not the crowd is laughing at one is again irrelevant to the internal grandeur of one's life. If people laugh at my threads and by the representation of myself I display within, then I am humbled by the fact I have brought a smile to their face despite the misery and squalor of their proletarian life.

What do you mean? 50% of Oxford students are privately educated (highly cultured) and the place is awash with amazing buildings etc. Why are you so emo?

You're not OP and for your info no one speaks like that in Oxbridge.

This. I watch the Oxford Union debates and most people speak too fast and quiet, suffering with some kind of anxiety disorder.

Just listen to the audience members that ask questions. They cannot construct a sentence without "erm" or "like...". They also tend to do this cunty self-giggle to themselves, showing how trivial everything is to them.

The whole place seems like a shower of cunts.

Probably because I'm at one of the left wing colleges with a high state school intake. Aside from my friends from societies and clubs, most of the my college peers are unironically "hard working" and lack the charm that being privately educated affords.

Love the city though

Debaters in the UK are all like that. Once (as I have) you get to a certain level in debating all the people who take it seriously are insecure, uninteresting and downright stupid.
They'll ask you to recommend them a text on philosophy once they realise how shallow and scripted they really are, so you recommend then On Liberty, or two Treatise on government, and the only response you get is "daddy Mill" or some empty bullshit like that.
They are genuinely the worst type of people you can come across in Oxford or any other institution.

Jesus Christ, I'm gay but holy shit you guys sound like the biggest faggots to be around. You sound like the kinds of people who would do a little snort if somebody offered you liquorice tea instead of earl grey.
It's like a 21st century Raskolnikov is measuring his dick with his own reflection for God's sake.
Can everyone just lie to me and tell me people like this don't actually exist? Like surely these kinds of people are just a myth right?

We exist but most of us don't show it in public. I'm betting OP also posts on R9K.

For my info? how profound!
To be told I'm ignorant of my stomping ground,
My dear Oxbridge counterpart,
Who judges truth to be his art,
I assert quite baldly without excuse,
That despite being a near recluse,
I know full well how folk here talk,
And of their aspirations at which many'd balk,
But if persist you do in posting slander,
I'd invite you to come and wander,
Around these most ancient hallowed streets,
And hear the voices of this nation's finest cliques.

OP's either trolling or LARPing. There are numerous cunts here, but plenty of guys are pretty chill and laid back.

Which colleges in Oxford are "left-wing"? Is this a meme or is a thing?

Just stop it. You're not witty. You're literally me in high school but I'm mature now.

Checking these quints like

And you're not wrong either. That false superiority is just an easy and socially praiseworthy coping technique among young done-nothing kids. Ignore it.

>Harry Potter-esque buildings
mass education was a mistake

>You're literally me in high school but I'm mature now.

Not a meme. The most notorious example in Wadham College which most lefty colleges think is too left wing.
For example the student committee passed a motion banning the wearing of academic gowns because of muh oppression.
Baliol college recently no platformed a conservative speaker, and tried to ban the Christian union from attending the Freshers fair.
Only a few of the colleges are known to be vocally conservative now. Most of the college student representatives are dyed hair SJW types.
Sure there are conservatives and libertarians like myself in college but left wing voices have been the most dominant in my experience.

What about New College and Jesus College?

What are their affiliations or whatever?

>Rhyming slander with wander

Blessed be the Dostoevsky analogy poster

These are literally the Veeky Forums equivalent of that stupid chicken spongebob normie meme.

New College does have formal links with Eton, and there probably is a bit of "wink wink nudge nudge" between their tutors and the teachers at Eton. New is unashamedly posh and I love it for that reason. Not too sure about the deal with Jesus.

They make *me* laugh, user. Does that stick up your bum hurt much?

Would it be wrong of me to write the following poem long-hand and slide it beneath the door of my beloved's room? Even passing her college fills me with such melancholy that I have taken to walking a longer route simply not to suffer such discomfort.

__________

I Would Have Wed Thee
__________

Most solemnly I wearily stride,
The space between us growing ever wide,
I confess I'd thought of love and marriage,
Yes that institution much disparaged,
To you alone my thoughts paid tribute,
For all other girls my lips were mute,
Your smile awakened such noumenal joy,
Such not available to the hoi poloi,
Surely you too felt something akin?
Towards me who against you would never sin,
So why then abandon me for the Jew,
Whose love will never rival my own for you?
Please my dear hear my plea,
And listen most attentively,
When I say forthrightly that my love's not wavered,
Thought my heart through loneliness is much belabuored.

__________

Next Gen was a gift we didn't deserve.

Please just fucking get laid already. I don't know if you're a virgin or your dry spell has been like 5 years but please do this for me user.

>Hoi Piloi
>The Jew

Jesus Christ my sides
Post it on oxlove you faggot

I got accepted to Corpus Christi, Cambridge to read history. Any thoughts about this college?

Sound choice. And remember even if there's something about your college that pisses you off you can always make friends from different ones.
Go to societies to get a break from the endless stream of normies you'd otherwise have to make friends with.

__________

My Response: An Expression of Regret

__________

Dear Sir who has expressed his love,
Don't resent I kindly ask,
Nor think of me as belonging
To a higher social class.

Love's strange way has led me to him,
Who makes me safe and happy,
That he's a Jew brings no chagrin,
Nor displeases my daddy.

Reserve your love for another,
A cute, witty, clever girl,
Who'll be your most ardent lover,
Let you in her private world.

__________

Is it really you my my special one,
For whom I have of late been so glum?
Can it truly sincerely be,
The one who inspired such transcendent glee?
How come you to this site and board?
What brings you among this anonymous hoard?
Never mind there's no need to explain,
Your words are a flower blossoming in my brain,
Please tell me just one thing I humbly demand,
Did you ever consider taking my hand?
Did you too lie dreaming at night,
Of a union which could have brought such delight,
Such joy indeed as I've never known,
Confined as I was so long to my home,
To that small ugly dwelling in which I was born,
And where I spent so many years so forlorn,
But no no I shan't pity myself,
When meeting you has brought me such wealth,
As has not been known by merchants and kings,
By money lenders and those obsessed with earnings,
And never will your Jew love you as I might,
As bitter as that sounds it's as clear as daylight,
Protect you he will and furnish you plenty,
Give you coins for your clothes and spare not a penny,
But the currency of the love we would share,
Is based not on gold but the infinite care,
That I would show you till the end of your days,
Oh dear I could love you in so many ways!

Doctor Seuss is a lot gayer and anti-Semitic than I remember as a kid.

Bump. C'mon no one else on lit is from Cam?

OP, are you a grill? I googled "cape jacket" and the results are all of womens fashion.
Pls respond.

Virgin detected.

That's how you picture yourself in your power fantasies, don't you? The truth is that you're one of these nerdy, puny boios with glasses and under 6'0", likely an Asian, who has opened this thread in a corner of a library looking left and right to ensure that no one sees you to make your miserable life more bearable. An honest advice: join some group sport society and try to befriend some normal ppl in your college and ask them then about the "swap" thing (that's how we call it in Cam but I'm p sure you have a similar thing in Ox), once you'll fuck a few cuties from other colleges come back to this thread and see what a piece of human trash you were. We've all been there, there's hope for you.

Ah, yeah I forgot a picture.
t. Camanon

>Harry Potter-esque
Stopped reading

'tis not true I'm Asiatic,
Nor does my body resemble that of a spastic,
I'm a rough but fragile intellectual,
On a farm or library equally effectual,
I'm a coarse uncultured slovenly brute,
And a pale blushing gentleman who is so very cute,
I am Harry Potter some of the time,
And at others a rogue yearning for crime,
I can conduct myself finely around the posh,
But also around those who have no dosh,
A man of the streets, a working class hero,
But also the kind to weep at a concerto,
Timothy, Pippa and Clementine love me,
Yet Neil, Craig and Chantel are just as adoring,
I'm a quivering fumbling virgin bridegroom,
And a man who has plundered many a womb,
I'm a big hairy bear for the girls who roughly enjoy it,
A tender prince for those who've barely touched their clit,
I can discuss obscure texts with men of old age,
And believe me Oxford has many such a sage,
But I can also trade slang with the plebs outside Spar,
And prevent them from breaking into my car,
You see Cambridge lad, or should I say gent,
It looks like your wisdom's already well spent,
Your advice in this thread has been all unwanted,
So isn't it time that from this thread you absconded?

Yesterday I got an offer to study English at Oxford. If OP is real and a retard should I seek him out and beat the shit out of him? It's the only thing that can save him, methinks.

Do none of y'all remember these threads from the beginning of the semester?

I only remember the one thread where someone told him to took a photo of the library he was in and it turned out he was legit (Bodley library or something?). I still can't tell whether he's serious about the girl though.

>go to an elite american private school
>go to a top american university
>one parent is an academic, the other an artist who inherited lots of money
>be outgoing, handsome and popular
>know an enormous number of people
>meet maybe 6 non-pleb interesting people in my life

Ouch, try not to make the poor guy kill himself.

Relatable. Tell me how do you cope with relationships? Did you lower your standards or treat women as pieces of meat? I can easily have sex if I want but I just can't stand building a relationship with a generic blonde posh girl and girls out of my circle were all literally pieces of trash. I really don't see hope. I guess I'll just give up at 30 and marry any remotely likable person and spend rest of my life playing a character of a husband. All fags reading this thread who are below 20 enjoy your fucking time, you can accomplish anything you want later but you'll never be able to fell in love innocently and without a mind as only teenagers can.

Learn to love for the journeys you'll make, not the ones they saw alone alone.

If you do it hit me up so we can find him together

relationships with girls you mean? they all follow a similar pattern that ends in them trying to adopt my personality and interests, shallowly of course. my most recent and successful, or at least my favorite, relationship has been with a girl who was a bit of a blank slate to start and willing to take up new shit along with me. it is an archetypal relationship in which i dominate, and yet we have not had a single fight or argument in 9+ months. i think its complete luck and wouldn't know where to start to find someone who fit so well other than finding someone who, in a general way, comes from a familiar background with similar values

>tfw op suddenly shuts up being afraid of Veeky Forums militia hanging him on his panties
Good job

>tfw walking around the ancient, highly aesthetic streets of Oxford alone
>tfw chilly and windy and my black cape jacket barely prevents the chilly wind from my sensitive pale skin
>tfw thought about writing an email to my former-hopefully-soon-to-be privately educated (~£36,000 a year fees), Elite, English Rose girlfriend but realized how pathetic that would be
>tfw barely anybody around, only the dregs of the Asian tourist groups, some humble working class (poor) locals and a few fellow students in pairs or small groups
>tfw just walked to Christ Church to appreciate the Harry Potter-esque architecture again
>tfw reminded of sitting in my small working class home as a child and reading Harry Potter alone for hours in utter rapture
>tfw reminded that the University of Oxford is the closest thing to Hogwarts in the real world yet I am miserable here despite resembling Harry Potter somewhat and despite having a similar background
>tfw thanks to the socio-economic pressures of the Muggle world (amongst other things) my qt former-hopefully-soon-to-be posh, refined, intelligent girlfriend decided to date a wealthy, popular, well-adjusted non-psychologically damaged guy instead of me, the rugged but sensitive working class hero
>tfw will return to my room soon to study even more while drinking black coffee, listening to Bill Evans, wearing black cotton trousers and a fresh shirt under a warm jumper and occasionally looking at a reflective surface to appreciate my aesthetic
>tfw feel guilty walking around Oxford at night, and taking pictures makes me feel like I'm no better than the tourist orcs who mill around because of my working class (poor) background

Such is life here at the University of Oxford that every day brings new mental turmoil, new obstacles to overcome, but also new intellectual territories to be conquered and new elite, genetically profound, cream-of-the-crop individuals to get to know and form connections with that will help when working in London and earning twice or three times the national wage by your mid-twenties. Such is life indeed. I hope you afll are doing well this night.

Portland, Oregon?

Oxford is literally garbage tier compared to Cambridge desu

>earl grey
>drinking flavoured tea
>ever

What's the posh choice?

Based oxfordposter

Snorting the tea leaves like a coke addict

>colonial architecture
>Harry Potter
Fuck off, manchild.

Why can't even the gleaming spires of Oxford can save the dullest franchise in the history of book franchises? Seriously each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of spacial effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Hogwarts being near Didcot; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for Scotland. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and aesthetic architecture. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

a-at least Hogsmead was picturesque though

"No!" The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.

Holy Shit kill yourself today

>class anxiety
How can I get rid of it?

>tfw fell asleep at my desk late last night while studying, here at the University of Oxford
>tfw woke up an hour or so later and just slumped into bed with my clothes still on, including black pleated cotton trousers, fresh shirt with a comfy grey jumper worn over it
>tfw I experienced a lengthy dream in which I was in London trying to reach a certain place but could not find my wage between the relevant tube lines
>tfw woke up this morning in my ancient dormitory previously occupied by several Great Minds of the post
>tfw looked at my reflection and saw that I had achieved the rare aesthetic of the dishevelled by brooding student (of the University of Oxford) that I have sometimes attempted to achieve
>tfw put on my unisex black cape jacket and walked through the early morning mist through the Harry Potter-esque quad where nobody else was around
>tfw the aging, working class (poor) gatekeeper said something to me in his working class (uncultured) accent but I simply smiled at him the same way I smile at ethnic minorities in passing
>tfw I "popped into the shop" to buy some milk, bread, jam, butter, tea, sugar and a bag of Wispa Bites on offer for one pound
>tfw I returned through the ancient, hallowed streets past old stone walls and rustic iron gates and past the spires (pic related) of ancient colleges
>tfw in my hallway I hesitated a moment while looking towards the dormitory of the Jew that my former-hopefully-soon-to-be privately educated (~£36,000 fees a year excluding additional fees for private tuition etc), posh, Elite, genetically unsurpassable girlfriend is now dating and presumably allowing to penetrate her
>tfw felt intense rage and anger for a moment, as per my working class (rugged) background, but decided to be the better man and make some jam on toast instead and a cup of tea with three sugars
>tfw a long day of studying ahead as I prepare for a ruthless academic period

I hope your day goes well fellow posters. Though you may lack the necessary intelligence and physical (not to mention aesthetic) environment in which to scale the kind of emotio-academic peaks I myself will ascend today, nor plummet into the kind of spirtuo-nihilistic nadirs I also will face in this waking period, I wish you well nonetheless and hope your proletarian existence is not burdened too greatly by the demands of an economy which recognizes you (perhaps correctly) as little more than an economic unit whose capacity as a human being extends little further than the role of "taxpayer".

oxford user is that you again?
howdit go with that thottie hottie?

oh nevermind, i have actually read the post now
sad to hear that :(

>all my friends are in debt
>but not me because I didn't go to school
>studied the classics myself for only the cost of books
>got into the occult, got into politics.
>whole thing turned me into a fascist

I'm afraid I won't be able to post much today as I truly have to revise as much as possible. However I will tell you that the love between my special lady and I appears to have perished, and she is now dating another student here at the University of Oxford, he being from a wealthy family, having attended a top private school, and now of course having the time of his life here at the institution in which he no doubt feels he belong. I meanwhile skulk around like a defeated peasant of the steppe, sleeping alone at night, wandering around alone in the day, and spending my time longing for my pure English Rose. I simply don't fit in here at the University of Oxford. I am neither a local nor a member of the socio-economic class whose children throng the streets of this ancient and aesthetic city and pack the lecture theatres and colleges and cafes and dining halls dressed in fine clothing, appearing like ideal physical representations of human beauty and genetic profundity, and studying subjects that most common (unintelligent) folk would barely comprehend the first thing about. I feel like a trespasser and a fraud. Every photo I take makes me feel like a tourist taking photographs of something to which he does not belong. I only take these photographs when nobody is in sight for fear they would otherwise pity me for feeling such affection for buildings they presume I would not be granted access to. I have a long lonely day ahead of revision and focused study, and though my intellect will flourish today (as it does every day) my heart unfortunately will struggle on like some mechanical thing, no longer nourished by the thought that I too am capable of being loved.

okay then why dont you post here more often
you may not belong there but you sure as hell do belong here :)
(whether you like it or not)