What do you think of my poem? im a girl so be nice!

Very little structure, no meaningful form, asks a meaningless question at the end which actively ignores the known and obvious answer. Bait/10. Otherwise, you're a teenager. If genuine, work at it. Read more poetry, and read up on form and structure, for the love of God.

i cant understand it either how could other anons like this
its pure shite
its not aesthetic or smart in its form and neither in its content
definitely bait tier

Of course it's bait to trigger women-hating incels.

>no
What do you mean "no"? You asked a biblical question and I gave you the biblical answer.

i didnt even read that shes a girl my dude

Leave her alone, m8. Poetry is flawed medium to start with.

why do i have to follow rules? :/

I don't like it

Typo in the second line (first line? is luna the title?)
Typed on phone, maybe I'm autistic but that immediately makes it worse in my eyes.
Why did you choose this exact form, these linebreaks? It doesn't serve the melody of the poem, I can't make out any other use either. It's just prose with linebreaks.
The wolves/moon/werewolf imagery is trite, you don't seem to add anything original to it. "I am cursed to bleed" makes me feel nothing, you don't really establish anything that would elicit a reaction there. It feels like there are 3-4 lines missing that establish the connections to have the poem work like it probably does in your head.
Why is Eve more damned than Adam? isn't a bad way to end a poem, I actually like it, but >blood is red and so are apples, is a really laboured way to get to that.

cliched and blunt/10

I'm surprised how much worse that is in English

hehe am girl
write about period

nice poem

>Poetry is flawed medium to start with

okay I wrote the poem in 5 minutes to make a bait thread however i really want to write poetry
like the poem is supposed to connect wolves/the moon to periods/the moon because they are both curses and eve/women have to suffer more despite both adam and eve committing original sin idk

I just used line breaks when i felt like it... i don't know anything about formal poetry
what's the difference between free verse and prose?

it's shit

what do you mean by blunt?

it sucks. i noticed last outing to the local Burns und Nobel that there were near exact copies of Rupi Kaur's format, same soft matte black notebook sized publications, stark white titles, and punchy short windows into the female condition. Shame that there is a future to this, though I'm not surprised that women need their juvenalia published. It's only fair if a work such as Witz is published by male hands.

>given the gift to be able to bring forth new life
>'why is life so unfair, periods totally suck'
It's a blessing not a curse

Just because you say it's a poem doesn't mean that it actually is.

>All of you taking the bait

It's a guy.

Most women are taught from youth that men have it easier and that they are always at a disadvantage. They're the black people of genders.

>poem is about a girl having a period
>mentions it's a girl in the post

why the fuck did you comment if you didn't read the thread??

death of the author
i only read the work not the context faggot

This. There are no femanons on Veeky Forums.

>he thinks anyone ITT doesn't know this, and aren't just having fun like every other thread

not bad, but also not my cup of tea. Definitely keep at it and you'll get somewhere.

>replies to the whole thread
>reddit spacing
>thinks people don't already know its a bait thread
Please leave

can't tell who's baiting who anymore

Its bad

i like it baby ;)

because you remind us we are born, and thus that we must die.

Women can't bring forth life by themselves, dumb faggot.

sol
dogs live among us
i permit it
the sun is a raging master
who burns us as he feeds us
loyalty
even to a hand that strikes
is a virtue yet denied to
women

dog poo

>a sarcastic parody of the poem is a better poem on its own merits than the original
Colour me surprised.

I particularly like the connection drawn between the dogs' reward (being permitted to live among us) and their seemingly unconditional loyalty (even when we strike them), and the juxtaposition of this with women, who wouldn't know unconditional love/loyalty even if they were lucky enough to receive it. No wonder they are not permitted to share the reward.

I don't agree with the political point this poem is making, but for (what I assume is) a scrap of doggerel it cuts sharply to the issue and presents comprehensively and compellingly a distillation of an entire perspective in just a few lines.

In short, Veeky Forums writes better insults than tumblr does poetry.

Forgot to mention the characterisation of the sun as a "raging master" who strikes us, but who we still need. Much like a dog needs his owner, or (so we're told) a woman her man.

very adolescent, a little cringey, but shows actual promise in the future. You wouldn't imagine how many good writers wrote absolute shit in their youth, but then you could read Rimbaud and become depressed.

yes
YES

>i instead of I
Why does every female poet do this?

the best minimalist poem i've ever read was an aussie shitpost

What do you mean by very adolescent?

anyway I know people are just being rude because I mentioned im a girl