Write what's on your mind Veeky Forums!

I hate Germans so much

Giving these last few years of my life to philosophy was a mistake, my iq is too low to understand even plato. It took me like 6 hours to untangle euthyphro. Is this normal?

my job is a real pain but i get to listen to podcasts while i work, so that's something. librivox is one of mankind's finest creations.

been there, done that. being high on the ferris wheel with the woman i love is one of the best things ive ever experienced in a visceral, sensorial kind of way

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>tfw no carnival loving gf

Something descriptive that appeals to the senses, like an author urging you to "imagine that you are on a beach, with the warm sand between your toes". Preferably with a matching audio.

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i have a headache and i'm very tired

I have to masturbate so fucking badly.

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Why is that mein Freund?

every time something bad happens in europe the germans are usually responsible

Honestly every single bad thing to happen in the world after 1871 is the fault of the Germans

after 1871? try 300 when those fags sacked rome, or 1500 when those fags started a bullshit heresy that lead to a century of warfare

don't forget they also have a retarded culture and a shitty language

I ducked myself out of financial aid for college by letting depression fail me out and by letting that become the excuse I convinced myself to use, like right now. Nowhere will hire me and I'm going to be homeless again before I can somehow bring myself together. I don't even know what I wanna do if I did.

Unrelated, anyone else find self-awareness to be painful? To be so painfully omniscient toward your flaws and psyche and everything and yet be unable to change anything as aware as you are? Feels bad.jpg

Love is the second attempt at nihilism's cure after religion fails. Once both do, you're doomed. I'm doomed.

I finally started Nietzsche. Something about his writing is charged with an emotional connection to me that I haven't felt since Kafka. Maybe that's why he's got his cock in Veeky Forums. It's not a bad feeling then, to be fucked by Friederich.

t. my diary desu

Trying to write Multiple first person P.O.V for my novel, And I'm having trouble setting up their own voices.

A kind user told me to give them unique quirks. Not the manic pixie girl quirks, more like, character A has crippling self-esteem issues and that's why he sometimes acts aggressively over innocuous comments. Character B had a neglectful childhood and that's why they're clingy.

I appreciate his advice, but I also want to know if its feasible for narration?

Like for example, Character A Narration is a mishmash of modern words and Archaic Words in his Narration due to him trying to overcompensate for his family poorer background compare to his peers/friends?

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The soul is being sucked right out of man by electric machines and computational efficiency, man is becoming no longer a social creature but a social unit, an economic unit. His very social nature is becoming a mere economic property to be calculated and exploited. Ted Kaczinski was right. If I were able to expunge a thing from the world, it would be the principle which allows man to harness electricity for work without toil. From the outside, people seem indeed like cattle growing fat, herded by the invisible shepherd who wields economic and mechanical efficiency as a whip. There is no use for the sailor as there is no longer a purpose for his sails

>The sky, in an ant's mind, is also an ant

Go to the pub loser.

I identify with you, you're as morbid, narcisstic and self-defeating as me

I wrote this in the other thread, but i want to say it again

>tfw hate liberalism but have practically lost faith in socialism after seeing so many socialist movements and platforms filled with retards
>tfw seeing opportunists and idpol everywhere and no engagement or emancipation of the working class.
>tfw i get called a classist or brocialist for saying so
>tfw most contemporary influential communist thinkers are all bourgeoise romantics who are nostalgic about failed capitalist states of the past
>tfw starting to think ideology is inevitable and genuinely becoming more sympathetic towards fascism because of idealist Hegelian dialectics, but still feel like it's too 'evil' for lack of a better word, but also starting to feel like that's just a conditioned reflex

The last two years have been such a clusterfuck and i don't know anymore

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Honestly stop paying attention to politics and develop other interests, it's boring/rage inducing to talk about with most people and you wont change anything by philosophising with your friends. There really arent any easy answer you'll just get tangled up in ideologies that dont really work in practise.

>Time has a soft, weak hand, and eternity has a mouth that never stops yawning

>God is a friend of the poor in dream, and the rich in reality

>People are hens whose teachers are
foxes

>Unrelated, anyone else find self-awareness to be painful?
Read about sola fide and bring it to mind the next time you feel like shit.

embrace aristocracy pleb

Is there beauty in violence?
I think of the this a lot. It almost seems like there’s a savage appeal we humans have towards it, regardless of context. Just like any other person I don’t like the prospect of humanity being built for self destruction but what if violence was more akin to a purging of bacteria, a way to get rid of horrible ideologies and generally human scum? I like to think there is a pleasurable experience to any violent act with enough explaining

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I have become more certain that the prehistory that resides in people's stomachs is
the one that wrote and still writes the history of their heads.

Only fascists like the aesthetics of violence

Damn it
And here I thought I was left leaning revolutionarie

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/ic/ here, is the crab mentality prevalent here too?

That's ok, you can just become a left leaning fascist

I've been on my uni reading Naked Lunch during more than two hours because I have class and no friends to talk with while waiting.
I wish I could trade my academic proficiency for social skills.

What about Malatesta and Tailhade?

Crypto-fascists

I don't know where to meet interesting women.

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I've been reflecting a lot on elementary school during the past month after not giving the whole experience a single thought for years.

It's interesting, I had no friends whatsoever there. I had a few fellow pupils with whom I socialized, but that just happened because they were there, in the near vicinity. We had nothing in common, no real connection at all, and I didn't particularly enjoy spending time around them. If they disappeared overnight I wouldn't have cared at all. They weren't friends. I didn't even know what a friend is. I still don't. I've just got an idealized fantasy of the concept of friendship, no real experience.

I remember pretending to give a shit about girls and one or two girls in particular, for no real reason other than because I figured that it was expected of me. They meant nothing at all to me, no more than a random patch of pavement I walked across today. Why did I do that? Why did I pretend?

I also, naturally, remember all the abuse and humiliation. Well actually that's not entirely true: I remember some particularly humiliating episodes but in general I remember the feelings more than I remember the concrete events or who did what and when they did it and why. It's all a visceral blur more than anything else. I'm not happy about remembering this shit at all, and I'm not happy about how I feel about it right now either.

I know the right, well-adjusted thing to say/think would be that it was whatever, that it was just kids and that it doesn't matter and that everybody picked on everybody at school and it wasn't all that personal and it takes a while for empathy and self-control to develop in people and it's pathetic to hold onto these feelings and so on and so on, but that just isn't true at all for me.

It may have been a bit of a laugh for them, just something impulsive to do to pass the time without even giving it that much thought, kids being kids and all that, but for me it was a fucking apocalypse day in and day out(as if I didn't already have a slightly different flavor of apocalypse waiting for me at home every day). I don't want to exaggerate and say that those particular experiences were why I ended up growing up into the ruin that I am but fuck, they certainly played a very, very large part in why it happened. Realistically, the psychological damage that has been done to me is severe(and has manifested itself in irreversible physical damage over the years to boot, in a variety of ways), and I'm not sure how much of it could be undone if I tried. I'm the poster child for learned helplessness.

They killed something in me before it even got the chance to live.
I know the normal thing to do would be to move on but fuck. I want to rip their eyes out. I want them crippled for life. I want to ruin them ten times as badly as they've ruined me, and then maybe, MAYBE I could think "okay, we're even". And like I said, I don't even really remember that many concrete details or faces about the whole thing at this point. I just remember how it felt, and now I'm living with the consequences of it. It's interesting.

And yet there are anomalies. I remember this one kid in particular, who was frequently and particularly vicious towards me, and try as I might, I cannot muster a single iota of ill will towards him at this point. I don't feel any contempt regarding him at all, it's like nothing between us ever happened.

I really don't know what to make of all this.

I moved away for college and then after graduating moved somewhere else for a job. Then I realized I wasn't making enough money to pay for rent/food/debt and quit and moved home. I've been working a shitty job for about a year now, but not paying for rent or food means I've saved up a little bit. I want to move somewhere now, but I don't know where. I've been applying for jobs in several cities but I don't know really what I even want to do anymore. I just feel like I need to move to a city where there are people my age. My home is in a rural area and the only girls/women around me are either single moms or addicted to heroin. It's a beautiful area but it's insanely depressing to be here at my age. And all my friends live about 2 hours away in a super expensive city I don't like very much. The cities I imagine myself moving to are hundreds of miles away where I don't know anyone. The thought of knowing nobody is both intriguing and terrifying. I lived for 5 years away from home and had to make new friends before but now that I'm back here again I feel like I did in high school where the thought of moving away feels like moving away for the first time all over again, with all the unknowns and anxiety and excitement and anticipation and fear and everything. Only now instead of knowing I'll get to have an interesting college experience, for all I know I could just be moving somewhere to work a soul crushingly boring job. I'm worried about accepting the first job I'm offered and then quitting it after a few months and ruining my resume. My resume already looks terrible for leaving my first job after college so soon and I don't want to do that again. I wish I had a girlfriend or someone for moral and emotional support. Or really any kind of emotional support. I love my friends but they are all yuppies
in the city now and doing so much better than me. They have nice apartments and stable longterm relationships and in their mid 20s have jobs that pay more than both of my parents make combined. I don't think they even know what it's like to have anxiety about being broke or being alone. I don't mean to sound like I'm complaining or like I think I'm a victim, but when I talk to them about anything about my life it's like talking to someone from a different planet.

bump

Im in a lot of pain because I dont have an identity

Im coming to the realisation that theres no one in the entire world who can understand my problem or can empathize, and I dont see a way out of my pit of hell

Stockton?

So I recently got the selective service registration papers and I really don't like it
I don't want to bleed out in some shit hole for a government I very much do not like. And yet I have to do it or else I'll get arrested.

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nigga this isn't the 60's chill out
congrats on finally not being underage b& tho

Tensions are high my guy
I'm pretty sure we're going to have a bunch of proxy wars with a bunch of backward countries that are on some heart of darkness levels of fucked. Idk maybe it's also my paranoia but I don't like how "do it or else" it seems

people are vicious, would-be torturers everyone of them, there's a sadist under the skin and behind the eyes of the kindest people. Everyone is a fucking sociopath, you play sympathetic with them, give them space to be irrational, try to grant them their stupid fucking presuppositions and unjustifiable axioms, they'll just take 10 miles of territory from you if you allow them this much. Laozi says to yield to overcome, but in this stage of human history, where everyone is a vicious, self-narrativizing, narcissistic, god-complex having, over worked, under stimulated, split consciousness you can't do this anymore. yielding to people to allow space for their whole being, letting the evil come in with the good, to save them from being cut off from you completely, this only leads to being poisoned by them. They'll take advantage of the smallest of opportunities to be unkind to you. I haven't had a person go out of their way to do something I actually needed in years. My family, my friends, my lovers all abuse the trust I give them, are unbelievably self-involved, haven't the slightest interest in my internal states or ideas, basically talk to me like i'm a toy to stimulate them. I'll listen to them for hours, give genuine thoughtful responses, help them with their psychological states, drive them places, buy them food, comfort them when they're alone and hurting but it means nothing to them. I'm a tissue, a condom, a burger some fucking product for them to break in a one-time-use, they're surprised when I show consistent empathy because 99.9% of others refuse to do this. I'll humor anyone, fascists, communists, christians, fedoras whoever, and I'm never given the same respect. I try to talk to anime pedophiles about why they are the way they are, and then when I try to convince them there are other ways of being they shit on me, tell me i'm a moral fag and then ruin the discourse. I try to talk to christians and really understand their world view, and then when its time to have an actual volley with them, they try to play the advantage and act like they're already in the know, and i'm just some sick degenerate rebel with no basis for my ideas, even when I try to be lenient and not attack what they believe. Fascists do this too, communists even more so. I've talked with social libertines, social conservatives, capitalists and technocrats and all I get is the same one-sided treatment. I give them attention, try to understand them, try to find a middle ground and all they want is war, they want me to submit to them or to convert to their belief or to leave because the mere act of entertaining divergent belief insults them. I've yet to meet a person with the patience or the consistent desire to talk to be present with them, to hear them, to incorporate them into my world as myself. I was tricked, because I was not a strong person as a child, into being a crypto-altruist.

Go sing kumbaya with the rest of them in Canada then, barely-legal faggot.

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Oh I'm sorry I don't want to fucking die
Yeah we're very self centered in recent years

yeah ever since netanyahu met with trump and kushners security clearance got nixed it looks like the syrian war is back on, nikki haley already setting it up in the un as we speak, the deepstate neocons isolated trump by taking away bannon and kushner, and now he's going to start their war

>gf is out drinking with her friends, barely talked with me the whole day, acts cold when it does

Fuck me.

I'm getting tired of being alone all of the time, and really want to find a gf. My intent is not simply sexual, but to find someone that I can really experience life together and talk about our ideas.

I know its a tall order, but I still have faith that someone is out there.

No I'm on the east coast. The city my friends live in is DC.

Reminder that the draft is fucking illegal unless war is formally declared, which the united states has not done since the second world war.

honestly good, and you'd have to be a retard to believe they would start a draft for this

But if you're faithless, and fail to get a gf, you won't be disappointed, while if you do, you'll be overjoyed. If you have faith, the best you can be is satisfied with attaining your hope, which may every well not come to pass.

If he's faithless, his motivation may go down the drain.

In my experience, the best way to "get a gf" is to interact in social groups that include women and make friends with women. As long as you're not an inspissated autistic pseudo-grammarian or plainly hideous eventually an intimate relationship will fructify. Fastening the idea that "I want a girlfriend" in the back of your mind is counter productive if you have trouble in that arena already.

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>as long as you're not plainly hideous
welp

my friend suspects I'm a virgin and teases me for it. i thought i was at a stage of my life where this couldn't possibly piss me off but alas..

I empathize with your situation but I also couldn't help but read this post from the perspective of all the people in my life I've distanced myself from. Shit sucks. I guess we're all guilty of this kind of narcissism you're describing.

Im a poorfag retard and I can't even do the first step to being an actual human being which is to fix my diet

oh no, there wont be a draft, trump will give dreamers and other illegal aliens are chance to get citizenship if they volunteer for the syrian war

You're probably not that bad, and even if you are, I know some terribly ugly men who have girlfriends. Just don't expect to date someone who looks like Kate Upton if you look like a goblin, it's pretty simple. I usually have far deeper connections with "ugly" women anyway, because ugly women are usually far deeper than physically attractive women who get by on their looks until those start to fade, then pin down some poor stupid bastard and get by on his sweat for the remainder.

ugly chicks have so many insecurities, and since everyone treated them like shit for being born ugly during their formative years, they tend to be really mean because they think that's how youre supposed to act since thats what the received...but im kind of an asshole too so when im hanging out with a former ugger and she says something really nasty about somebody i can just shrug and be like "lol she said it not me"

I need the scariest, depressing, most black-pilled book to read right now.
>tfw read "The Fear of Death" and felt almost nothing

Yeah, they're insecure as fuck and given to self harm, but there are plenty of "pretty" women who are the same way, and don't have the added bonus of reading books other than hot YA genre fiction garbage.

Of course there can be attractive, intelligent, and erudite women, but they all belong to the eternal Chad, and this is what all of my experience tells me. Intelligent women (some vastly more intelligent than I am) all prefer men markedly less intelligent (not slightly less) than themselves. I don't know what this is about, but I see it all the time.

Bump

have you read the conspiracy against humanity? it's pretty good

Ill take a look. Thanks for the response.

no problem, let us know what you thought of it when you're done

Sometimes i come up with utterly imbecilic ideas for a thread and giggle to myself like a retard of how stupid they are.

Why does everyone have to pretend they're not hungry at dinner time? So what if I'm a grown man and so what if there's kids that haven't got their plate yet? I work hard and I'm hungry.

what are you even asking here? can you not solve your own problems, ask yourself what the consequences are if you eat your shitty dinner before your gross kids, if you can deal with that then do it, if not then don't. social norms don't matter unless you want the reward for following them, which is probably not having to listen to your horrible wife screech in anger because she follows the same weird dinner rules you do. eat your dinner.

I'm questioning why those types of social norms exist in the first place. I don't need to be told I can flaunt social norms if I really wanted to. Your response is one of the most autistic things I've seen today.

theyy exist because they're remnants of etiquette and culture that developed and then slowly degraded over hundreds of years, you're literally whining whyyyyyyyyy on a Cambodian graffiti public broadcasting channel

Drinking is fundamental to many social situations, in the millennial generation especially. Many women lack the ability to socialize directly with men without the protective encouragement of alcohol. It's not uncommon to see the shyest girls become social butterflies as soon as they have that sex on the beach or cosmo.

Unfortunately for us TRP gym freaks that like to get a good lift and want to see a significant change in our bodies, alcohol is the ultimate destroyer. Especially, as OP pointed out, BEER.

So the battle begins of mitigating the negative physical effects of alcohol against the social stigma of not drinking at social events.

Solution: Vodka water with lime

Fuck, this might be the most disgustingly melodramatic and self-pitying post I've ever made on here. I really have to stop working myself up into these states, they do me no good.

what about when your brahs want you to have brewski?//?

always awkward coming to this board as a jew and seeing people unironically rec shit like culture of critique

surely there's a way to be an edgy bad boy bookworm besides 'fuck da jooz'

again the hitler dubs

there's one wacko crank who posts 90% of that shit and everyone be perfectly ok with that guy being banned

have two credits on audible but i already pirated everything i wanted to hear, recommend me something obscure to cop, preferably non-fic

Been having some introspection on the character of my reasoning processes. Something that's struck me is how immediate most of it is. Now, when something is merely a matter of straight forward, algorithmic deduction, that's one thing. How one thing leads to another is clear and easy to understand. However that, along with specific-to-general type inductions, make up only a small amount of our practical reasoning. Most of it consists of a back and forth between making predictive models of the world and correcting for the models when there's something that doesn't fit. Reasoning to the best explanation, one may say.
And as I've said, I've realized on introspection that it's immediate. When you try to solve a riddle, you are trying to fit various interpretations onto the problem and intelligently reasoning consequences to those interpretations. And while I could always retroactively see how I got to where I got, this ability seems largely innate. Some people are just better at it than others, and trying to bring fervor into things only marginally improves how well you perform at this. At best you can only keep at it stubbornly until you figure it out and your brain has the eureka.
This applies when I try to learn a new concept ,in say physics, and try to test it against my understanding of reality. I am actively interpreting and reinterpreting the concept as I try to apply it to a larger amount of cases, and the rate at which I do this seems more or less fixed when I keep at it. Or if I'm reading and trying to analyze and/or interpret a text, the same follows. I grapple with understandings that make the most sense.
And again, it all seems immediate and like a thing I can't really improve the rate of.

Thinking about love and death. Thinking how there must be a purpose to all of it, about how I would gladly dedicate my life to someone or something, if such things existed for me. About how my lack of focus and direction squandered any pontential I have and about how I wish it wasn't so. Thinking about my desire for immortality and how boring things have been so far, about how afraid and frustrated I constantly am and about the weight in my head that's always there, and has been for quite a few years now.

Who else /snowed in/?

This, most of the Veeky Forums losers who can't get a GF are stuck that way because they suck at making friends and generally being likeable. This also why they dont get anywhere in their careers.

I think I would enjoy working as a garbage collector or a public maintenance worker. I think I'd be very good at my work as well, very diligent and thorough.

And I really need to stop coming to fucking Veeky Forums. This website enables and actively encourages my worst tendencies.

>Confessions of a Veeky Forums Janitor

What's wrong with it?

Just drink a Guinness or two and stop at that. It's got relatively few calories and is actually nutritious, unlike vodka.

kek

Over $150 from my writings so far this month, I'm all stocked up on food, got a bottle of Jameson's whiskey waiting for me for St.Pat's and gonna have at least one pint of Guinness on the occasion downtown. I've been doing pretty good at cutting down my drinking in the meantime and I continue to make progress in making writing my full-time profession.

What's on my mind? Happiness. The Sun in shining and I can hear a bird chirping outside.

Proud of you user, keep on writing that erotica