ITT: Veeky Forums sexual fantasies

No, don't do this to me. I can't have this much heartache.

Itaots

>I'll never rape 37 Vestals in a row

jesus is giving his sermon about loving your enemies and turning the other cheek and i run at him, throw him to the ground, and start anally raping him

And when you're done he "turns his other cheek", if you know what I mean.

>ywn try to teach her Latin and giggle at her cute accent
>ywn ask her to tell you her people's stories and myths
>ywn hug her when she cries at night because she misses her homeland

I ship hildegarde von bingen/bernard of clairvaux 2bh

I want Theodora to dominate me

Justinian seemed to enjoy being her bitch.

>be forester
>look out for forest, go hunting, care for plants, etc
>one day hear find a nobleman attacked by some animal
>save his ass
>it is some Emperor's eldest son (Turkish, Timurid, some Mongol?, Uzbekhs or whatever)
>get invited to court
>enjoy life as a rich person and friend of the next Emperor
>still modest though
>Prince has to push me to party and do decadent things
>"dude, you can totally do as you please, come on"
>"Y-yeah..."
>gets me drunk, like I was never before
>gets me laid
>insists on me starting an own harem to overcome my modesty
>maximumlewd.jpg
>various other fun things
>as time goes on, intrigue at court maximizes
>Prince should not have been alone in the woods that day
>I should not have saved him either
>people want me dead
>game of thrones was too tame compared to this
>prince bro and I try to save our asses, become actual best friends
>unveil a big conspiracy at court that wanted to kill the whole dynasty
>be friend of the family for life

Something like that.

There was a Habsburg embassador to the Ottomans who wrote diaries and letters about the Ottoman courts. Being pretty Christian and modest, he wrote about the whole harem thing like it was the picking of the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden. His writings probably influenced Western writers in later works, but I am not sure. I saw a documentary about it.

Pierre Abelard x Heloise

True patricians know what I'm talking about.

He literally raped her until she liked it. Years later she was still craving for his dick

>tfw he doesn't struggle because he's a bro and understands the cravings of the flesh
>tfw he hugs you afterwards

>tfw be a great Khan
>Get so much pussy that hundreds of years later, about 1/4 of the planet has my fucking face

>tfw be an Ottoman Emperor
>Cultivate a harem that is varied, exotic and always has something new to entice the eye
>From super dark sub saharan tribeswomen to dragon girls to the fey blonde europeans to full veil homegirls - always exciting because you never know what you're going to get!

>tfw you will never be a wealthy Pashtun in the 1800s with a Hazara or Kafir sex slave

life sucks

h*nd h*lding

I want a foot job from Empress Irene

>be qt Makedonian shepherd boy
>enter into (hot, manly) chieftain's service
>gently introduced to buttsex by him at 14 or 15
>become a guard, rise in ranks, attract women and analize other boys
>Alexander does it the madman, we go to war
>travel all over the known world for ten years chasing tail and pounding the pudding in every town from the Adriatic to the Indus and the Nile cataracts up to the steppes of Sogdia
>perfumed Egyptians, veiled Arabians, hairy Armenians, cultured Persians, wild Bactrians, and everything in between
>along with a bit of eunich or slave boipucci every once in a while
>retire to Makedonia during Diadochi Wars, find a qt wholesome wife, watch my ten children and hundred grandchildren grow big and strong
>reminisce about the dozens of towheaded bastards I have all over the place
>die in peace

Life is suffering lads.

Fugg, why did you do this? I already fapped twice today, now I have to do it again!

>you will never be a young girl in 17th century Hungary
>Elizabeth Bathory will never seduce you and molest you before slitting open your stomach and playing around with your organs
Why even live senpaitachi

You are a disgusting degenerate for making this thread friend. Try going home and rel=valuating your life

>viking
>amazing bondage sex with redheads
>lots of boats

I am a simple man.

...

>tfw you will never be an explorer charting out the Brazillian or Mexican coast
>tfw you will never stop at a nice beach to gather supplies
>tfw you will never find a qt indian girl bathing in some spring
>tfw you will never enjoy each other in the soft grass nearby

This is my curse.

Dem child bearing hips mang. Gets all the gf's that I've had hot and moaning when I talk about their hips.