Dota 2 General Thread - /d2g/ /gulag/

Secret is going to lose to TS

isnt it

WHO HERE /TEAMTOAST/ ?

My boy eskill got this.

Sheever!

It's okay PLD is on Lion. They literally can't lose.

>secret will be leaving this tournament harder than Britain leaving the EU

heh

I've always wanted to be Tresdin's squire. I always enjoy fantasizing about entering the fountain with her after a long battle and slowly removing her armor, starting at the helmet and making my way down to her boots. The embarrassment I feel doing this in front of other female heroes only adds to the allure of the situation. She sits down on a stool and commands me to kneel down and remove her boots one at a time. "Is that a boner?" Rylai says. Akasha licks her lips, Rylai giggles, and Shendelzare glares at me. I try to cover it up out of embarrassment, but Tresdin kicks my hands away. "You haven't finished yet." I don't understand because I had already removed her armor, but after she gives me a look I realize that she wants me to remove her shoes as well. I take off her shoes and reveal her gorgeous feet, surprisingly soft despite her being a strong warrior, and extremely sweaty. "Lick the sweat off my feet, squire," she commands me. I hesitate for a moment and look over to the other girls. They all start giggling at me and whispering. Then I feel Tresdin's foot forced into my mouth with the other one covering my nose. The smell and taste of her sweaty feet causes my raging boner to grow even more. "Alright, squire, stand up and remove your clothes." Although embarrassed, I take all my clothes off. Suddenly I feel my position swapped with that of Shendelzare. Suddenly I'm lying beneath Akasha and Rylai, who had both taken their boots off, and were pressing their feet against my member. "No," Tresdin said, "He's mine." She runs over and gets on top of me. It's only now that I realize that she's holding Aghanim's Scepter, and I understand that nobody will be able to interfere with us. Her technique gets more and more intense until I am unable to hold back. I cum inside her pussy with the force of a hundred megacreeps. She gets off of me, and as I lay there quivering in pleasure she gets dressed and begins to chuckle. "Only 9 inches? Pathetic."

Are secret just incapable of winning early?

post yfw secret and eg won't go to TI because of their retarded player switching

>tfw Secret will win this
THEY NEED TO BE CRUSHED

>implying they won't lose to TT

ITT: Characters that remind you of yourself.
For me it’s Kefka – intelligent, nihilistic and with a wicked sense of humor.

holy shit, even his hair used to be fat

They are garbage. They are just winning because 40+ minute games are rare for newer teams to have practiced.

what was the original version of this pasta

>people like this retarded odp+sheever reality tv steam

God I just wish our guy ld would cast this instead.

>pld baiting literally every ult

Poor pld, feeding so his artz and ee don't.

>secret

Are these guys nobodies?

i doubt TT is going to win

Secret can just win by inertia with ravage into nova

I'm fucking awful at this game

John Connor... it is time.

What the fuck is this reddit invasion? He has ALWAYS until his first appearance in Secret been le funny guy spewing memes, loudly shouting in russian and massaging era.
Literally the only notable thing about him was the fact that he was considered to be the best meepo player in the world which didn't mean much because it was never picked in competitive. And even then, when Fnatic played with Excalibur, meepo was always being picked FOR HIM, not for fucking notail.

Damn these guys have secrets number

yes when im seeking to date a girl i make sure she is more feminine than masculine because that's what im attracted to

Bro they have a HoN champ and are 7k

they gucci familam

Ex lemondogs players and some Hon pros, 2x 7k atleast.

How's Secret going in the Open Qualifiers?

Then quit. I did.

All EE and arteezy can do is click creeps until they can't be stopped

choking and it's not even semis yet

...

They're doing good. Despite being a shit T1-team, they're T1 nevertheless
I wish they got disqualified

This is the original version.
Step your meme-game up, senpai!

yes but its still secret with a press R to win lineup

TT has to become massive and not fuck up while secret will always have a chance until much later or something goes extremely wrong

itt: fat manlet neckbeard thinks he's more "manly" than someone a woman actually likes because "muh facial hair" "muh shoulders" "muh caveman ancestors"

m8 stop living in the past, you said it yourself he's been a T1 player for over a year and a half, people were respect banning his signature heroes on Secret and C9, that's not something you do to the "weak link" of a team
kill yourself already

>nobash void
what meme build is this

I didn't mean to reply to your message,
it was meant for:

they're most definetely not tier 1 riught now, tier 2 maybe, but not tier 1.
if you're generous then tier 1 = top 8~ teams worldwide or something

>fat manlet neckbeard

stickfigure trap faggot detected, cry some more skelly

just me or are the queue times getting worse and worse?

don't you know about the offlane Useless Void build meme ? For some reason it's a thing

the "I got $50,000 from turk billionaire" build

How will EE meme this game into a sure loss?

Does he go agh instead of BKB and become irrelevant? Mask of madness to dying every fight? Or typical farming dangerous with no buyback?

theres a huge moth-butterfly-like thing in my room. do i kill it or nah? it hasnt moved yet but im 70% sure it will bother me in the future.

help

Like the tournament so far guys? :)

>puppy not on axe
>suddenly secret is gucci

Can't make this up, don't pick this hero for yourself anymore dude!

Any chance of qualifiers being rigged ?

Full team secret fallen warriors when?

>blogging in middle of open qualifiers

leave

>be billionaire
>offer some no names who never made money off vidya in the third world 20k each to throw
>Secret "win" open qualifiers against better teams

WAKE UP

THE TRUTH IS IN FRONT OF YOUR EYES

Don't play tide. If you want to offlane play something that can have an impact by itself because your teammates won't have good teamwork. Like void.

>Same retarded builds
>No iron talon
>Shit CS every game
>Blogging during esports

can someone give me a video where CLQ says "ample amount of ____ "

I need it for a vid I'm making

the couple problems are so leaking in

It'd be far easier to rig the qualifiers than an actual LAN

FLYING SATYR
LMAO

And risk a huge scandal that could get Secret banned from esports for 1 year or more if any one person of the many people involved talks?
Yeah sure thing buddy.

>struggle against literal whos
>stomp 7ks like it's nothing

ummmmmmm

How do we save him?

Axe let them win last game dude.

Only control against a bkb Sven

>7k stack doing worse than literal who stack

is MMR a joke

literally everyone on dire dies from lion + sunsstrike and theres no aghs ns to stop them
is ez at that point

Give him his Shadow Fiend back.

anyone else feel depressed after PD was stolen their win?
dont even feel like watching any more
this toast team wont win since their void is shit and they have no synergy with any other hero
after that its bo3 x2, secret wont lose those no matter what
fuck =/

considering getting MMR consists of picking the same 5 heroes over and over. yes it's a joke

only because fucking envy never bought an abyssal.
Tbh puppey axe was part of what got them in that situation where sven was even a threat.

His plays in the early to mid game put them in a sorry state in the first place. I'm not arguing that he fucking clutched it in late game, but today and yesterday showed that his axe is not the most stable of heroes.

Enough with this nonsense, Secret are playing XBOX, SHUT UP FUNNEK and Goblak next

>Implying he didnt call isis on them

white fries gaming are a bunch of fucking retards

dead men tell no tales

What is this shit in the background of ODPixel's stream?

puppey is shut up funnek

youtube.com/watch?v=yuyV6G6atoQ

How the fuck did this team get this far?

im talking about Secret LOL

>literally being this new

Envy couldn't afford to get an Abysall because then he would have 0 dps, couldn't have threatened Oracle which is what let them get fights going their way and all.

Other choices could have been BM and Enigma, but BM was banned and Enigger couldn't have tanked like Axe did

>watching SEA OQs

lmfao

SEA regional qualifiers are going to be trash, OQs are probably like watching a 5k pub

>secret going through all the Bo1 on the first attempt

HATERS GETTING BTFO INTO OBLIVION

Novelty of this ODxSheever stream wore off pretty quickly desu.
Watching ingame with no caster and directed camera is probably better than this meme infested garbage.

>EE

there's still a slav meatgrinder after that

>lose a teamfight 4v3

these shitters are somehow worse than secret

I'm depressed as well.
Why did they kick w33 and Misery anons ? That Secret was the most successful and the fun to watch one

That Oracle was 95% useless and wasn't much a priority and I honestly think he was throwing

>Ulting Sven immediately after he BKB's at full health

As an Oracle player I can tell you he did this on purpose or he's never fucking read what the skills do. There's no excuse for doing that at all.

Agreed. PD fucking rekt them but they crumbled under the pressure big time.
That one last fight where PLD was baiting saved their sorry asses from being eliminated.
Also Sven's subpar backdoor attempt.

HOLY SHIT BASED BULBA SALVAGING THIS GARBAGE TEAM

BOLBA TOUHG

>EE: Fast, how can I throw this game?
>Puppey: Just buyback and die again

ABSOLUTE MADMAN