I'm John Green and this is Crash Course Buttplug History
Now, we all know that buttplugs are used today for pleasure, but what were they originally used for.
"Oh, I know I know. They tried to reverse shit."
Oh me from the past, how naive you were. What they really were used too retain water when people from the past were suffering from dysentery. Dysentery is a disease that causes heavy flow and can't quickly cause dehydration. It asimportant then and as it is now that we clog up those passages that water so commonly seeps out.
Now that we've discussed the purpose of buttplugs lets talk about what they actually are.
"Oh, Mr. Green Mr. Green! It's when you have a pieace of poop slightly sticking out your anus or 'poop purgatory' as I like to call it."
NO me from the past , that's very gross! What a "buttplug" was made of actually varied in different parts of the world. In places like Africa they would use wet dirt (commonly called mud) while in Southern Europe (more specifically Italy and Croatia) they would use garlic cloves or wooden mallets. And in places like Japan they would have specialty carved plugs that would honor certain festivals. Theyr'e truly a site to be seen.
Thanks thought bubble.
What I find really interesting, and very unifying of all peoples, is the need to shove shit up our anuses to stop the flow of water.
What's that? The mystery compartment.
And in today's mystery compartment we have a cup full of diarrhea with the word "dysentery" written on it.
This ones for you, dysentery, because without you we wouldn't have this satisfying, and exciting, form of pleasure.
And with that see you next week for our discussion on whether butt plugs count as BDSM.
See ya.
I'm John Green and this is Crash Course Buttplug History
"I enjoy 48 dicks in my cheerios"-John Green
>buttplugs
I'm confused.
Is this a Veeky Forums thread, or a /k/ thread?
I mean, he's a terrible author, but 'Crash Course World History' is actually pretty good for teaching somebody the basics of modern historical scholarship.
The basic basic basics, yes. But more often than not people walk away from it knowing they know a lot when really know next to nothing.
i like this
More like saliva..
no its not
fuck off John
>le mongols XDDDDDDD
And today we're going talk about Alexander the Great. BUT HE WAS A MAN SO HE COULDN'T BE GREAT. ONLY WOMEN ARE GREAT. Am I right, ladies? And now for the mystery compartment. Someone sent me a dildo. Mmm. I'm going to enjoy putting this into my ass later.
Why is he one of the most detested people on Veeky Forums?
This guy isn't even anywhere close to a militant progressive leftist. Is anyone who has that trendy university look and isn't an angry neo Nazi a cuck now?
>Crash courses are good
Get the fuck off this board and go back to middle school. I see people saying they passed some American exams thanks to his videos, but he doesn't actually teach shit.
This. He is still annoying as hell though.
I believes so. Either John, Anthony Burch or that one guy whose wife worked at Nintendo and pimped him.
>Is anyone who has isn't angry a cuck
FIFY, and the answer is yes.
Sometimes he is pretty moderate, other times he is a raging american-liberal PoS.
Him and his brother absolutely are
>alexander the great wasn't great
>colonial women defected en masse to live as native squaws because european culture was just so oppressive to women
>greeks were an evil oppressive patriarchal society and persians were great and tolerant and a multicultural paradise
>the renaissance was all muslims, dumb backward christian european retards didn't move a finger, everything was given to them by the superior enlightened muslims
>the great european explorers that mapped the entire world were irrelevant, the chinese explorers were superior, they just didn't feel like exploring, but they could've if they wanted to, because they're superior to europeans
yeah, nah, fuck that rat, he is lower than dung
>>colonial women defected en masse to live as native squaws because european culture was just so oppressive to women
wat
also, the persians were pretty fucking laid back.
Well I mean he called that the the nickname "The Great" is sexist.
He also sacrificed explaining historical phenomena fully for being "edgy" and forcefully anti-Eurocentric. I'm talking about him choosing some Japanese guy for his talk about nationalism. I'm sorry but if you want to fully explain the phenomena of 19th century nationalism in detail you need to focus on Europe.
>laptop literally has the meme woody guthrie sticker
Sorry for the spelling mistakes. I was drunk when I wrote that.
This is how you get (You)s
I went in after reading your post expecting some absolutely astounding historical revisionism. Yeah, he's pushing that non-eurocentric view like said, but nowhere near as bad as I thought he would.
> He's lower than rat dung.
Whatever happened to just saying someone is wrong.
Plus, the guy opposes the Whig approach to history. He can't be all bad.
Have a (You)
I'm inclined to agree with him. I've met some actual militant leftists. This guy doesn't come close.
In their utopia, he's up against the wall with as many 7.62x39 bullets in him as the rest of us.
people exaggerate on 4chin
He doesn't outright say all white people should hang, but that's the general theme of his videos
europe=bad
everyone else=good
>Whatever happened to just saying someone is wrong
He's not only wrong, he's insulting.
you need to get out of your logic and in his logic for a second. In his view history for the average americans is all about the european perspective with the rest of the world being side characters, he wants to turn that around and show the other perspectives of history. He expects that americans already know the western perspective.
Besides he doesn't even write the script for the videos, his former history teacher does.
i dont think hes really trying to directly insult western culture. the theme of his videos is to teach high school kids basic world history. in high school, there is a huge push for multiculturalism and an attempt to not just learn about ourselves but other people in the world.
there is some western bashing going on, but id say it has more to do with the education system today than him pushing some personal liberal agenda.
Bump :)
A screen flickers to light in a dark classroom in Stockholm, Sweden. The students eagerly await the video to load, so they can receive their anticipated lesson.
>Hi! I'm John Green and this is Crash Course: World History and we're going to talk about the Renaissance.
The Students clap and cheer violently, a round of applause going around the room and the children smile, knowing the all-wise John Green is here to educate them about the past.
>We all know those stupid Eurocentrists claim the Renaissance was driven by Italian innovation...
The students boo and frown, vaguely aware that the "Yuro-centrists" are always the bad guys in Mr. Green's lessons. A few are on the edge of their seats and in tears, hoping that Mr. Green will soon defeat the bad guys like he does every video.
>but every true non-fascist knows it wasn't done by privileged Italians at all...it was driven by Muslims!
The students cheer and cry tears of joy, knowing that at this point in the video they are transported into Mr. Green's "Thought Bubble", which shows them delightful images of men in turbans painting Renaissance art and raising children with white Italian mothers.
>But remember kids... the Renaissance didn't even matter! The Europeans still didn't have socialized healthcare and multiculturalism! See you next episode!
The screen suddenly goes dark, and the children dejectedly leave the classroom for their next class: Traditions of Islam and Cultural Awareness.
You forgot one of the kids going
>allah ackbar!
>you're in the library quietly reading with your gf when this guy slaps his books down on your table
What do?
They were. Also, they were so white the Greeks marveled at the site of one of their dead(at Maraton..?).
And Athenian treatment of women was literally ISIS-tier. However being a middle-class Greek in a city state was probably pretty comfy in some places where they didn't throw their shit into the street.
Rape him and yell "Thalatta! Thalatta" as you're about to cum.
t. John
>In his view history for the average americans is all about the european perspective with the rest of the world being side characters, he wants to turn that around and show the other perspectives of history. He expects that americans already know the western perspective.
Is that why he talks so much about slavery in Europe and North America while his only video about the Ottomans is one giant dick sucking fest about how advanced and prosperous they were?
no they're not, they don't deal with the issue of historical perspective in any way
they're just a liberal whig view of history from teh bad menz leading up to the present day where we have obama and things are better but we still have a lot of work to do haha : D
They're good at giving you a specific perspective on history in a dorky tumblr apologist kind of way.
given you're clearly samfagging here
how can he at once 'expect people to already know the western perspective' and yet you admit western high schools now ignore a huge chunk of western history in favour of multiculturalism
he's either going against the grain of modern history teaching or reinforcing it. pick one.