Whats The Stupidest Thing You've Done While Driving?

ITT: Really dumb shit you did while driving, no matter if it ended in a crash or not.

>be me
>driving around with a friend
>he can't drive so is curious about stuff
>'hey what happens if you take the key out while driving?'
>have stalled before while moving so know its no big deal
>doing 70mph, but road is big and empty so fuck it
>shift into neutral, turn key to turn engine off, take key out
>*click*
>steering is now locked
>now in the wrong lane headed for hill that makes up the side of the road
>slam brakes on
>stop so close to the end of the road I wouldn't be able to open the door
>big flat spots on tyres now because no ABS when engine off

Pretty stupid.

I have had close calls while texting and driving but I still find myself doing it sometimes. It's fucking stupid

I accidentally turned into a one-way street with a cop car coming down the other end. He was shaking his head but didn't pull me over.

>drive my moms shitbox when i was 18 before i could afford my own car
>thought I was dagumi
>raining decently hard
>long straight farming road with a broken line
>huge box truck infront of me going below the speed limit
>small gap in oncoming traffic
>decide to gun it and figure I can make it
>truck sees and starts speeding up
>I can't pass him and realize it's too late
>slam on the brakes and lock them up
>hydroplaning down the opposite side of the road at 60km/h
>finally let go of the brakes and regain traction
>swerve back into my lane and pull over
>start crying
>stopped trying to be dagumi, just drive normally everywhere now

Almost got wiped the fuck out using the wrong lane because "muh racing line" but managed to dodge the oncoming car.

>19 years old
>mom took me along with her to a weekend business conference in Seattle
>driving around in the rental car doing touristy stuff while she was busy
>done for the day, drive back to the valet parking at the hotel
>valet opens the door
>I get out of the car with it still running in drive
>takes a second or something so I didn't notice until it started rolling forward
>he has to jump into the car and slam on the brakes before it rear-ends some guy's lexus
>I was so shocked at my incompetence that my only reaction was "whoops my car back home is a manual, must have forgot heh-heh"
I still cringe at making such an elderly woman driver tier mistake like that

>not very long after I got my license
>take my mother to some store she had to go to in the city centre
>park in parking garage
>time goes by
>leave parking garage
>try to reach the machine to insert the card which opens the gate
>somehow accidentaly slip on the throttle for a second (car is an Automatic)
>stop just before hitting the gate
>(pic related)
>back up a bit
>unbuckle and get out of the car to insert the card
>get back into the car
>want to buckle up again but because of the panic my hands were jittery and I couldn't do it
>[panic intensifies]
>mother says to just go and buckle up when I'm outside
>don't realize that the car is still in reverse (somehow I overheard the beeping the car does when it's in reverse, partly because it also beeps when the seatbelt is unbuckled )
>almost back up into the car that's waiting behind me
>[maximum panic]
>I manage to leave the parking lot without any damage

I felt so fucking stupid and embarrassed for the whole day. Whenever I heard about people "accidentaly accelerating" somehow and then causing crashes I always said to myself "Ha, how stupid would you have to be to do that" and then I almost did it twice in a row.
Atleast now I know to put the car into neutral when I'm entering/exiting a parking garage (for automatics atleast) and that warning beeps are fucking useless if there are too many of them

>thanksgiving day
>raining like a bitch
>long empty road with one curve
>hurr durr imma drift my fwd shitbox
>proceed to pull e-brake
>hydroplane into guardrail
>words before impact
>fuck.

Now I have a new radiator, headlights, and unpainted bumper

Oops lol

>pic related

>driving through shit part of town I've never been in before
>Need to make a left turn
>come up on stoplight without a turn light or a lane for it but the traffic is clearly two way
>have blinker on, light turns green, go
>oncoming side is apparently green too
>almost get T-boned
pretty wary about that now

also
>get off work late
>tired and want to go home
>"empty parking lot"
>back out of parking spot at full speed
>realize I narrowly missed a car that was parked behind me in a blind spot
yeahhhh

>Almost wiped someone out

Fixed that for you.

The sooner people start realizing this the better off we are as human beans.

Looks kinda nice with an I painted number desu

2nded
Don't paint the bumper, keep it as is.

>1983 Datsun
>Can take key out of ignition while car is running
>Datsun doesn't care
Scared the shit out of many friends that way

>just added new exhaust and intake
>dat sweet M54 tone resonating beautifully
>about to leave shopping center that has a restaurant on the corner
>bunch of dudes sitting outside and a myriad of different mustangs in lot
>assume they're having some kind of meet
>pull out and launch perfectly
>spin motor to 6500 rpm
>can feel their assholes clinch
>shift into 2nd
>spin to 6500 again
>holy fuck this sounds amazing
>exhaust and intake making sweet sweet love to everyone's ear holes
>shift into third
>miss the gear and grind horribly
>engine winds down
>hang my head in shame and feel embarrassed for the rest of the week

At least I was out of sight when it happened. Still bothers me to this day

>stall at a stop sign at the top of a hill
>panic.exe
>handbrake doesn't hold car in place; hill so steep it drifts 5mph backward
>car is a shitbox so starting requires precise application of gas as I turn the key
>try a few times to start as the handbrake lets me roll back at 5mph but to no avail
>just let my car drift downhill until I'm at a level spot
>change to 2nd as I'm coming up but not enough torque
>engine shudders for a good minute until I finally clear the stop sign to turn left
[spoiler]I'm not a woman and I've been driving stick for 4 years[/spoiler]

I did something similar.

>be me
>only use my car every few days to go hooning
>always try to park it as far out of the way as possible
>don't want to annoy people who actually use their car for work
>be parking so close to a wall I have to climb across to the passenger side to get out
>notice I've parked a couple of feet further back than I should have
>get back in car and sit on centre console because I couldn't be bothered to get in drivers seat
>slowly edge clutch up with the wrong foot (right hand drive)
>turns out right foot clutching is hard
>jump clutch and slam car into neighbours fence

I felt pretty bad about it, but he was cool with it. It didn't really do any damage to my car or his fence, just needed pushing back into place. I still felt like a turd.

had a mustang like this, pulled that shit with a girl in the car. "hey can you hold this for me?"

Is this a bad thing? I have a '94 Olds that I can do this to as well.

Did stupid shit with that car too as follows:
>going down a steep slope at 25 MPH
>winter and the road is icey, unsanded, but I think I can handle it
>four blocks from a stop sign
>better try to slow now so I don't slide
>tap brakes ever so lightly and the car starts sliding
>keep trying this as the stop sign comes closer, car will not slow without sliding
>going even faster now, somebody is a block ahead of me coming to a stop at the sign
>sees me unable to stop in my GMC made toboggan of death
>doesn't stop, hits his gas and takes the corner to get away
>I sail through the stop sign four seconds behind him and finally get on dry road

I was lucky it was early in the morning and it was only myself and this other fellow on the road. I'd like to say I bought better tires and got the ABS on the Olds fixed after that, but now I just wait until the roads are sanded before I drive that road in the winter.

My f250 does this, can also start without a key

Rear ended someone at 20 when I wasn't paying attention to the road, the cars in front of me clammed their brakes, and mine were worn as fuck and basically failed to slow me past 40mph.

This will be a good memory once shit box is kill.

>snowstorm started that morning, roads are getting covered in snow and haven't been salted yet
>narrow country road, 1 lane each direction, 55mph speed limit
>hmm this section of road is straight. I can go 50mph in the snow
>the tracks worn in the snow are halfway across the center line. I want to stay on my side of the road even though it's snowy
>cruising along
>suddenly sliding to the right
>towards a telephone pole
>miraculously regain traction and stay on the road.

Looks kind of cool with the wheels desu

Keep making mistakes user, you seem to have good luck

A good cause led you there user

You will ride eternal on the fury road

You sound like this bullshit

>18
>just got my license
>driving to my job at a ski resort
>winding scenic innawoods road up to it
>98 Stratus with shit tier balding all season tires
>RACECAR
>decide to just see how fast I can go one day because the roads look clear enough
>RACECAR
>WOT
>get up to about 98-100
>start to back off because I've had enough
>doing around 70-75ish when I hit a patch of ice
>car goes sideways
>skid right off the road
>sideways into a ditch
>about 10 feet to my left is a street sign
>jesus fucking christ
>about 100 to my right is a huge fucking drop off
>about shit my pants
>sit there for a minute in shock
>finally decide to see if I'm stuck or not
>put it in reverse
>backs right out of the snow filled ditch
>drive to work about 15 under the rest of the way
>get there a couple minutes later since I was right up the road
>adrenaline dump still going on
>get out
>legs give out and I absolutely eat shit in the snow
>get my shit
>get inside
>"haha, you slip on some ice user? You okay?"
>"Y-yeah. Slipped on ice."

...

Me or the u of o shit?

the pic

>be driving around in summer
>see barely clothed chick riding on bike going in the opposite direction
>keep my eyes on her for a full minute
>crash
Repeat thrice.
In my defense, I got to fuck one of the three.

Just checking

>Crash 3 times looking at hot chicks
>Get to fuck one of them
>?
>Profit

"Fixed That For You" was a thing long before tumblr got its hands on it.

He is right, though. The sooner people realize that crashing into someone actually involves another person, the better.

>Get laser eye surgery
>Next day drive to work at night shift
>Heavy rain and can't barely see anything but glaring lights
>Made it to work without getting into an accident or dying
>Afraid to drive home after work but still do it
>Made it home safely
>Decided to call off work for the next few days
>Not worth risking my life for minimum wage

Probably did lots of stupid shit while driving. Can't remember them all. The only time that I did any damage though was...

>still getting my license like 7-8 years ago\
>drive my Dad's car
>drive parents to the mall
>back up to a spot
>trying to get really deep into the spot
>parents "stop stop you're gonna hit-"
>backs into a wall
>dents the car

>driving back to school with a friend during our lunch
>have to make a left on a busy road that is basically a highway limited to 50km/h, semi's all the time
>see a semi come as I get into turning lane
>decide to play it safe and wait, even though he is fairly far ahead
>friend says to me "you can make it through, go"
>I decide he is right and make the left
>problem is I had a mental lapse and it took me a full 3-4 seconds to process his statement
>by the time I make the turn the semi is literally RIGHT in front of us
>gun it and escape by fucking literal centimeters
>drive 30km completely white knuckled rest of the way too school

>still find myself doing it
You mean you still do it despite close calls. I hope you crash and kill a family as you're reading this post

Worth it imo

One time I even got all damages reimbursed because the other turd was driving on an expired license so my insurance shifted all the blame unto him.
However the second time I broke a leg and an arm plus various airbag burns, and totaled the car. And unlike the other two times the girl didn't even stop to see if we were alright, the bitch. Not worth it at all.
However, considering three is only the number of times I've actually crashed, and that I've now learned to slow down as much as possible when I do this, I'm not feeling like stopping.

Sniffed a bunch of Ambien. Drove to my friend's house like 10 minutes away, rear ended two different people.

Don't drive on Ambien.

...

Drive by shoot Alphonse's house

>>oncoming side is apparently green too

Second day of owning my first car I backed into my aunts c63 AMG while pulling out of my driveway. Always look behind while reversing boys.

Downshift, nigga.

>truck sees and starts speeding up
dickhead

>Be 16
>Drive a 2003 Mitsubishi Eclipse RS
>Driving home from a friends house
>First time driving in really heavy snow
>.3 miles away from my house
>come up to a curve in the road
>colinmcrae.exe
>try to do a Scandinavian flick
>pull handbrake
>realize I'm headed straight off a small drop into a ditch
>slam on brakes
>No traction
>shit
>drive into ditch
>very stuck
>call dad to come pick me up
>visibly upset at my retardation
>have tow truck pull my car out
>minimal damage to the bumper
>drive like a normal person after that

>scandinavian flick
>handbrake

sharted in my pants

>Buy new wheels 4 weeks ago
>Parallel park in the street because my brother needs to leave soon, so I can't park behind him
>Parked fine, a bit far from the curb
>I should get a bit closer to the curb
>Inch backwards while at the same time my dad calls me
>I look forward while reversing
>Hear and audible scratching noise and car feels like it bumped
>I scratched my new wheels

It's only the outer rim that got scrapped, but it's barely visible.... However I know they are so I'm bummed. There's also no reason for me to be at a proper distance from the curb, there's literally no one that comes and goes on my street and it's literally 4 cars length, people can drive around. FML

>Manual s10 pickup spins tires if you start it in 5th gear
>Raining pretty hard
>trying to turn left next car is a little distance away
>Igottime.png
>floor that bitch trying to make it in time
>redline in 1st, shift, redline in 2nd, shift, in 4th gear before truck starts moving
>halfway through turn when rear end starts wanting to be in front
>mfw 360
>Car still coming not slowing down
>savemeallah.exe
>Finally catch enough traction to get out the way
>Laugh my ass off the entire way home

>going home from school
>highway, speed limit 55
>doing 75
>a few cars going 60 in the slow lane
>one car in the passing lane going 65
>doesn't change lanes
>there's an opening to pass him in the slow lane
>change lanes are speed up
>other car speeds up too
>pass him and cut him off while narrowly avoiding the car ahead of me in the slow lane
>speed away

nobody was right here

>not knowing the difference between wheel-speed and vehicle speed

you should never be in a gear that high at a speed that low. the wheel torque will always spin you out trying to do that. learn to clutch.

You know how rally copilots say "Don't cut?"

I didn't have a copilot.

such is life on the grocery store special stage

>not knowing I don't care
Shit was fun as hell

My 87 4runner can do that. Funny thing is it couldn't when I first got it a few years ago.

Wait am I reading that right and there is a university out there with the functional equivalent to the fucking gestapo? That terrifies me to my core.

>Buy Meme Machine
>Enjoying the fuck out of it
>Cruising through town for people to admire me
>Ground is wet
>Making a left hand turn from the light
>Decide this is a good time to look down and change the station real fast
>Suddenly look back up and "DEJA VU!"
>Going sideways towards the curb and I panic
>Manage to correct it so I ride up on the curb from an angle
>Scrapped one tire and the wheel with it
>Each of those ugly POS cost 500 from the dealer

Fucking scared me straight I swear mate.

>pulling into parking space
>not really paying attention
>lightly bump into a car
>oh shit oh fuck oh shit oh god
>pull out park successfully
>inspect car can't find any damage on either of them
>leave insurance info on their window anyway since I might have missed something and I have to get to class
>come back to note on my windshield
>"there was no damage to my car we're cool"

I have never been so relived in my entire life. I was sweating bullets the entire time I was in class.

I have a good one!

>Be me
>Be about three months ago on my way back to school from home
>Two lane highway
>Middle of bumfuck nowhere Arizona desert
>Be about 7pm
>Driving behind a semi
>See dashed yellow lines so I take the chance to pass
>In opposite lane of traffic
>See another semi truck down the road
>"Oh it's far enough, I've got this!"
>Hits gas HARD
>Literally putting my foot through the pedal
>Semi truck getting closer and closer
>Get about a foot in front of the truck I'm passing
>Literally about two car lengths before semi truck in front will collide
>Swerve hard in front of the semi I was passing
>Missed both trucks by a single foot on either side
>Wide eyed driving with car back in control
>Cop car with lights on about 1/2 mile down road
>Cop is standing there with a radar jaw dropped in shock
>Waves me by

Never again man....never again...

I know that feel. I scratched up one of my alloys doing a 3 point turn like 4 weeks after I bought my car. I was so pissed I pretty much immediately went on eBay and bought new ones, now I'm super careful when parking.

>Each of those ugly POS cost 500 from the dealer
You know you can just have it repaired right? Costs like $150.

>grocery store special stage
kek

>only just got my license
>late for school kinda stressed out
>its raining and theres lots of traffic
>waiting at an intersection for what felt like forever
>see a gap and floor it out of frustration
>rear comes out around the corner
>nearly hit a parked car and look like the stupidest cunt

>rainstorms a couple of months ago
>remember I am a professional racing driver
>take to the streets to pull off some hektik skids
>come to mini roundabout
>pop in my eurobeat cassette
>full throttle in second gear
>rip a mad skid around the roundabout
>still sliding way past when I wanted to be
>countersteer, overcorrect too much
>flying towards kerb sideways
>overcorrect again
>now spearing in the opposite direction
>get control back
>guy in van behind probably thought I was dagumi

I almost changed lanes into another car once. Otherwise stupidest thing I did was sliding on the ice and I hit a turn to hard and impacted the opposite curb. Nothing broke thankfully.

is she pooping on the street?
is it designated?

She's calling her boyfriend telling him to update her Twitter to 'just got in a car wreck lmao' because she can't get 4G signal.

Luckily I didn't. I just decided to buy something different.

>Be 19, on P-plates for 8 months
>Light drizzle as I come up to a semi-busy roundabout in my E36
>See a small gap in traffic and decide to take it
>Young adult brain concludes that 245-width tyres have infinite grip, and that nothing bad could happen from planting the throttle midway through a roundabout in the rain
>Tyres come unstuck and rear end gets happy
>Now sliding through roundabout, decide to carry the drift through without any prior experience, feels amazing
>Overcorrect the countersteer and start a chain of tank-slaps, with each successive one getting exponentially worse
>Do a full 180 and hit a traffic island side-on with a lot of inertia
>Car skips over the traffic island, sending me airborne through oncoming traffic
>Land in ditch on the other side of the road, miraculously with no damage to the car besides a bad rash on a wheel from the gutter jump
>Two middle-aged women pull over and one of them praises me for how spectacular my accident looked
>Get a free drink of water from the nice lady, and still make it to uni on time

That BMW learned me good. A shame it got totaled by a stupid old bat.

>>Two middle-aged women pull over and one of them praises me for how spectacular my accident looked

Drinking.

2.5 days in jail and now I have a breathalyzer interlock device on my ignition, possibly for a year. Oh, and $5,000+ for my lawyer, 700 to get my license reinstated, 1200 for bail, an extra 90 per month in insurance. If I didn't have a good job I'd be completely fucked. Worst decision that I've ever made.

One of my shithead friends did something like this but the dent eas veey visible and he tried to walk away from it but the rest of us told him to quit being a cunt and put his info on the other dude's windshield

>Drive moms Mini
>letting someone out
>try to turn around
>Mini turn circle
>Nope.png
>finish my turning
>suddenly 2 cars appearing behind me
>try to get it into 1st
>fuck up at least 3 times and put it in reverse
>people honking

Thanks BMW provided Gearbox

>2am
>following a full b double milk tanker
>decide to overtake at the next straight
>get half way past the truck and see lights coming around the corner
>nearly past the truck and another milk tanker appears around the corner
Had the choice of slam the brakes on and go back behind or drop back another gear and floor it.
I chose floor it, probably not the smartest thing i have ever done, the tanker had to slam its brakes on for me to get past.

>it's the cars fault I can't drive
k

>first month of being on P plates
>rain, doing a u turn at a round about in my 91 Legacy
>decides to plant it out the exit
>understeer
>let of power, snap oversteer
>nearly get stuck between two islands

Better than being in the passenger seat while your mate nearly understeers into a hillside

>>Cop is standing there with a radar jaw dropped in shock
ebin

I'm gonna tell the fuckin story here and now boys. And I don't want to see any more pussy posts from you guys.
>get drunk with friends at around 9
>yo user wanna go down to the fuckin mudpit
>fuck yeah man
>smashed as fuck I'm 15 with no tolerance
>everyone else is pretty drunk too
>we got in big diesel truck
>going around 80 mph
>halfway down the road from the house a deer bolted across the highway
>friend slams breaks
>deer antler sticks front right tire
>swerved off the road directly into a telephone pole

The only reason I didnt die that day is because I wore my belt. My buddy driving slammed his nose on the airbag(less) steering wheel and shoved the bone piece into his brain. When we hit the deer his friend sitting in the front seat got thrust halfway out the window from hitting the deer and swerving and fractured his skull. Literally broke the hardest bone in his body. I was told by my mom ole Davy boy bled out before the anyone even called the ambulance. And Mason died on contact.

Fucking wear your seatbelt.
Fucking dont drink and drive.

You risk your life and everyone elses around you. Learn from the idiots.

>[IS] Bill Nye isis guy
Allahu akbar motherfucka

:^) don't drink and drive

but alcohol is haram

He's got a point

>be me
>be riding my motorcycle
>had license for maybe 6-8 months
>heading home after a long day in the city
>riding through favourite twisty road, get to the other end where it opens up
>see something I want to take a picture of, turn around and pull over
>guy on a bike zooms past, think nothing of it
>zooms past again, he's on a Suzuki Across
>zooms past again but slower, he has my attention
>zooms past one last time and heads off back towards the city
>it's_on.exe
>gear up and chase him down, catch up to him right as the road starts to get really twisty
>he's absolutely hammering through the corners, I'm struggling to keep up
>never pushed myself this hard before
>he's doing ~100 around these tight-ass turns and 120+ on the straights
>road starts to open up a little and he starts to pull away because his Across is faster than my Ninjette
>catches up to a car doing the speed limit (60km/h) as the road gets twisty again
>we sit behind the car for a bit until the road opens up and he passes on double solid lines
>think fuck it and follow suit
>back up to 100-120km/h again
>come around a left hander at about 90-ish, can't remember
>somehow had my foot resting on the shifter, didn't realise it at the time
>until I hit a bump in the road and my foot bounces on the shifter, forcing it from fourth to third mid-turn that is
>tail end of the bike slides a bit but I somehow manage to keep it under control
>asshole puckers so hard it just about ripped half the muscles in my ass in two
>slow down a little but the road opens up and the last of the good corners end
>follow him until he stops to see what he wanted and then ride home

Trying to keep up with someone who's clearly faster than you is a recipe for disaster.

And then you fucked him, right? Were you top or bottom?

Driving when I'm way too tired to be driving. I'll get out on the long, flat interstates of the midwest and try to make a 2 hour drive at night with very little sleep. Usually I end up head-bobbing and rumble stripping my way through the last half hour with the windows down, stereo cranked up and a/c blowing in my face. It's amazing that I haven't just completely passed out and crashed. I have panic moments where my head will droop and I jerk awake on the rumble strips.

>drivan around local arboretum
>wintertime in shillinois
>occasional patches of ice that were starting to melt
>approaching sharp steep downhill turn
>ice patches galore
>brake in neutral like a moran instead of engine braking
>lock up
>slide into ditch at side of road
>stuck because mud
>end up having to call park rangers
>everybody walking by/staring
>finally get out when a ranger brings a metal claw thing for traction
thankfully the car was fine, the only thing damaged was my ego

If you turn left you let the other guy go first breh

>brake in neutral like a moran instead of engine braking

Braking is braking. Engine braking wouldn't have produced a different result.

>must resist abu hajaar posting
>cannot resist
>abu hajaar did nothing wrong
I hope you're happy.

>be running the touge
>doing mad skids on hairpins
>approaching tight left hand uphill hairpin
>drop it into second, floor it like usual
>car rises over crest in the apex
>front wheels lift off ground
>lolcantturn.jpg
>flying towards wall
>panic brake
>run onto grass a little but otherwise gooch

Mother fuckers that speed up when you decide to pass them when they are going 10 under forcing you to almost wreck avoiding oncoming traffic

>Minivan going 80km/h on a 100 road
>Cars ahead are pretty far away
>Drop down into 4th to unleash my shitbox's might
>Up to 140km/h
>Minivan still alongside

I had to brake to avoid the getting into a head on collison because MINIVAN.

>doing speed limit
>happen to pass some guy with a turbo leak or someshit because his car is hissing like nobodies business
>10 seconds later i hear the leak get louder and louder
>zooms past me
>WOOSHHHH
>does a huge blow off right next to my open window
>almost deafened
>wont let me pass him again

>Driving to the uni in my miata in the morning
>Winter, there's a bit of snow on the road
>On summer tires because retard and didn't want to spend the money for tires I would just use 2-3 months a year
>A bit slippery but that's fine
>At a turn decide to dagumi it and rip a hektik skid
>Little did I know there was black ice under the snow in this corner
>Understeer straight through the corner, jesus take the wheel
>Climb the curb, hit a wooden pole and break it
>Burst an assisted steering line and bend the hood, the bumper is fine for some reason
>Nobody saw me, drive like a grandpa the rest of the way and make sure to never try anything on snow again.

>driving truck
>relatively new to manual
>go to shift from 2nd to 3rd
>shift knob comes off before in gear
>panic because can't brain
>accidentally throw shift knob out passenger window
>now have to shift bare stick
>....

anyone have a shift knob recommendation for a 93 ranger? 4 cyl 2wd.

>BAUHHUHUG WHAT D O I DO OMFG BUUUHHADUHHFHHH
>THROW IT OUT THE WINDOW
kind of thinking i would expect from a toddler dude

Goodbye my sides
What the fuck user

I meant to put it in the passenger side footwell but I can't find it now and it's been like a week so I think I tossed it out of the vehicle. I didn't even acknowledge what I was doing when I did it. At least I don't think I hit anyone with it.