Things you can say about your car - but not your girlfriend

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I got it used

>tfw dating a virgin

She sucks, squeezes, bangs and blows very nicely.

I got mine used and the interior was ruined

It's reliable

My friends are not allowed inside of it.

She's older

I let my buddy borrow my car for the weekend and he was nice enough to fill her up before bringing her back to me.

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I'm not the first one to ride her ;)

I have one

I have 3 and they don't bitch when they're next to each other.

It never has a problem with me touching it

I have no problem with myself and 3 buddies climbing in and driving all day long.

I've left it in a barn for a year and a half

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it makes me feel free

I think I'll trade her in for something better looking

I'd never do anything to hurt it

Yeezy did not reupholster it

Numerous prior owners

i'm so sorry user.

It doesn't have marks, bulges, scars. It's in fine shape. It lost all its baby weight.

'only one owner' woulda been funnier

It tells me exactly what is wrong with it.

My car won't wake up one morning and tell me it doesn't love me anymore.

I'd rather birds not shit on my car

>It's black.. :D
>It only has 2 ways to enter

It was recently gutted after having tranny problems

being inside it makes me happy

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I had 6 People in there one time.

Unreliable, expensive to keep, huge as hell and fat as fuck.

Keep dreaming, m8.

I prefer the European one to the Japanese model.

i can fit 3 friends in the back

Its got 224029 miles on it

It runs well and is in good shape

Its only 6 years old and 3 dudes can fit in the rear

I don't have a gf or a car.

eats too much

I spend money on it.

i have two of them that love me as much as i love them

>not fucking your gf

I trust my car with my life
I can last hours on end inside it

This

are you 16?

7 series vitch nigga, love the thing more than my meh tier gf.

Forgot to add that the car is still beautiful as fuck.

I keep blowing trannies.

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