Driving to school this morning

>i4 daily commute in orlando
>cunts regularly use the right merge and exit lanes to pass
>everyone drives bumper to bumper at the exit with the most offenders.
>drivers literally drive off the road because they didn't want to exit
>cops sat there one time and watched them drive off the road and handed out tickets.

It's a war zone here

You mind if I "save_as" this? I will give you full credit i future shit posts.

Literally worst scum,you must be driving BMW. I can feel it 7000 miles away.
>thou I do admire your guilt tripping tactics, and would do the same if I weren't that much more pussy and goody-2-shoes

If you hadn't sped up when you saw him approaching the merge, you wouldn't have had to slam on the brakes. Looks like you're the only one to blame for your woes.

People moving over early and using only one lane is what makes the congestion worse.

Use all the available road and allow other vehicles to merge like a zip.

>tries to prevent someone from merging properly
>somehow the other driver is the asshole

>being this insecure

The ideal is that cars would stagger, but of course people don't actually TAKE FUCKING NOTICE OF THEIR SURROUNDINGS AND PLAN AHEAD KNOWING THAT THE LANE WILL END, and thus they go "oh now, I guess I have to merge at the last minute, make room!"

Sure user go for it :^)

>construction going on down the road from me near the exit to the highway
>they have a marque sign with an arrow pointing left
>two signs saying merge left
>I merge over early because I'm one of maybe four drivers on the road at the time
>in the right lane in an older buick
>they're already driving much slower than the speed limit
>stop light before the ramp and the cones have started
>sitting at the light and check my right mirror
>see buick accelerate hard and they drive right into the cones and out into the middle of the road
>traffic cam flashes
>old as fuck lady gets out and starts screaming bloody murder
>old guy gets out of the passenger side and starts yelling at her
>the one car they were blocking is a beat the fuck up camry
>he beeps once and just sits there waving his hands at them
>light turns a green and I drive around all of that
>drive over the overpass and get ready to make a left at the at the light
>see a black subie flying up behind me
>runs the red light I'm stopped and tries to turn left
>drives right into the barrier
>driver gets out and just stares at me like I'm somehow involved in his accident
>roll down the window and as if he's okay
>"Fuck you man, does it look like everything is alright?"
>light turns green and I turn left onto the highway
I love Tacoma sometimes.

>Driving home from work at night
>Area where there's a large straight inbetween 2 standard roundabouts
>fuccbois always race eachother at the double lane split up the straight every night
>cops recently started parking on the straight
>watch fuccbois get ticketed every fucking night

It's not even funny now, it's just part of the daily routine for me now.

I wouldn't let you through even if you did yell that towards me in the middle of traffic. Who the fuck does that?

I straddle the line the last 50ft before the lane ends just to block faggots like you.

>Always drive 2 feet from the person in front of me's bumper in this situation
>beater commuter has a huge dent in the front bumper from where I hooned it into a wall
>no one dares try to get infront of me

i-4 is another level of crazy, you pretty much have to drive like an aggressive asshole or you wont make it out alive.

You deserve to be dragged through 15 miles of 10 grit sandpaper at 50mph by your balls, fucking degenerate.

Human nature doesn't allow things like this to happen ideally. Zipper merging is basically communism of the highways. In theory it's fair but in practice it goes to shit.

>all this butthurt because people don't zipper merge
Stop being faggots.

arstechnica.com/cars/2014/07/the-beauty-of-zipper-merging-or-why-you-should-drive-ruder/

stay in that lane you dumby

Virtually everyone knows this, but it's also something they aren't willing to do.
>ME FIRST, ME FIRST

Or, if you wanna be a real dick, unbolt the driveshaft from the crank and leave it on the ground under the vehicle.

THAT'S HOW MERGING WORKS YOU FUCKING RETARD
HUUR DUUR LET'S JUST ALL MOVE INTO THE ONE LANE 5 MILES BEFORE THE OTHER LANE ENDS THAT WILL HELP WITH THE FLOW OF TRAFFIC
KILL YOURSELF

Me. It works surprisingly well. You think you immune to it over the net but IRL I will guilt trip you hard and you will let me in.

Doesn't help. I've jumped into the shoulder before. Had one guy pissed off as shit, following me into the merge, and on the horn for a good 20 secs. He stopped when someone else merged in front of him. Lmao. Would have used the horn for a lot longer. Feels good man.

Anyone who tries to merge in front of me like a jackass by cutting me off will be ran into and I will act all kinds of injured. They will be at fault because they are the ones making a lane change therefore they must yield.

I have ran several people off into cones because at the last second d they realize I give no fucks. I miss in the faces of people who wanna play that game

>driving over a hill
>typically don't bother using a left lane on this hill because the far left lane merges and people rocket up that hill to skip cars before merging
>over the other side of the hill
>there's an exit and traffic is backed up on the right
>check mirrors
>check side
>nobody
>start switching into left lane
>mfw a benz comes rocketing over the hill going something like 90 honking at me before he's even 100 feet away
This is by far the part of the highway with that goes the fastest on my daily commute, strictly because of people who are desperate to pass as many cars as possible before they merge. And it's not a busy road so they get away with it. But why? Going over the top of a hill is one of the few dotted-line cases when you should never pass people. It's like a losing-faith-in-humanity moment every day at that part of the road.

Isn't that what your supposed to so in a zipper merge?

Yes. People are stupid and get in the lanes early so when you get to the end and "cut them off" they get assblasted because they feel like you've wronged them.

>driving to walmart to get food
>intersection where it is is 4 lanes wide
>while coming up to the lights i see this total shmuck in the left lane
>he suddenly decides he wants to take a right to the commuter rail
>proceeds to turn 90 degrees and drives between cars while 2 cars back from the lights
nothing seemed to happen from it but i was just flabbergasted that he did it

Why not get a dashcam and let them hit you to get that insurance dosh?

What I like to do is once things open up for a bit back on the road, I pull along side of them calmly. I tap on the glass of my window , or lower it if at a low enough speed. I point down to signify that their tire is going down, thereby making them want to pull off and check it out. By the time this all happens and they see it was all just a ruse, I'm long gone.

>acting like a retard on the road
>in your two ton death machine powered by ancient combustible dinosaur blood
Bruh

This, we're all in a rush to go nowhere. I hate having to drive around here.

Well fine, then just let people zipper merge you at the checkout at the grocery stores, you'll be there forever. I get what you mean by it, but anywhere when a shit load of traffic it will slow down the two lanes due to the merging and create more traffic. I use to live in Hawaii, has some of the shittiest traffic, any time there was the on ramp and it was traffic hour all the lanes would get fucked over.

...

>driving in shittruck
> construction coming
> zipper in as needed
> past the cones
> at the barrier
> wild buss appears and slams on the brakes and yanks front wheel in front of me
> nearly shit self from almost getting hit by bus
>get through the single lane
>floor it and pull around the bus
> brake check him down to 30
>he signals to make the next exit
> make exit with him and brake check him down to 5
> pull off into wife's work

>Keying it is also inconspicuous, just run a key or sharp object (box cutter, again) while you're walking past it.

You only need to wear a cheap ring with a sharp edge on it. You can keep it in the car's cubbyhole or visor organizer pocket. Use the ring when needed. As you walk by the car, simply drag the back of your hand across the surface. That doesn't look like keying a car at all and you are not holding any object in your hand for an observer to see.

>30ft
Quit being a bitch and close that gap to under 10. A Fucking box truck could have merged into that space.