How do I lie to get an office job when I've only had factory jobs for the last 4 years?

How do I lie to get an office job when I've only had factory jobs for the last 4 years?

Bump from my phone

I have an interview today for an administrative position, what's the best way to bs it?

I put lied on my resume and said that my last two jobs were office assistant roles.

Not sure what job you're applying for, but at my IT job we usually can tell which people are lying based on where they said they worked last and if they can answer easy questions related to it. If someone says they've worked IT at a smaller firm but then cannot recognize DHCP they were either really shitty or they're lying.

We need details to help you, what is this job even for? Are you familiar enough with the specifics of that job to compete with someone who has 3 years experience?

Job description says front desk support. Answering calls, filing, processing applications. I put on my resume that I know how to use Excel and QuickBooks, then did a crash-course tutorial on each

I lied to get my job.
My girlfriends dad owns a business and he said he's happy to lie for me so I put on my cv that I did something similar there. Definitely helped.
Fuck it why shouldn't we lie? It's hard enough to get a job these days, it's a dog eat dog world and ya don't get anywhere being 100% honest all the time. Good luck user

thanks user

unfortunately I don't have anyone to lie for me, so if they actually call those place and find out I only did factory work there then I'm fucked lol

I work in an office and I'd rather have a factory job. I\m actually leaving my job next year to go to trade school, I fucking hate office work that much.

Make somewhere up and make the phone number a friend?
Or just don't put down any phone numbers and say "referees available on request" that's what I do. You'll find 90% of the time they don't call your referees

Hahahaha you will be back! If you've never had factory work before you will be in for a very rude awakening. Heck, maybe the novelty of being out of the office and in a manual labor job will last a while. I'd give it a month at most. Then you'll be begging for a different job. You have no idea what you're getting into lol

I'm a computer scientist and I couldn't tell you what DHCP is off the top of my head, other than that it's some part of the internet protocol maybe.

What kind of answer would you be looking for?

I worked in factories and warehouses for 6 years, I miss it.

When I was in High School, I had a job in a non-union factory called "Baker Box". I was a "Press Monkey". I sat on the floor in back of a huge hydraulic press that was stamping out metal corners for wooden milk bottle crates and caught the pieces as they came out and stacked them into trays.

The noise was thunderous. There were no OSHA safety rules back then and nobody though of ear plugs, besides the regular press operators were already deaf anyway. After the first minute I couldn't hear anything anymore. After about ten minutes my eyes would start to water and I would loose orientation and become "punch press drunk".

I would work for an hour and get a five minute break. I couldn't leave my spot under the press during the break because I was too disoriented to walk and was temporarily deaf. When the press operator came back from his smoke break we would start up again for another hour.

Luckily, we only needed so many corners stamped out so I only had to be Press Monkey a couple of times a month. The rest of the time I would get to be a "Dipper".

This involved plunging wooden boxes into a vat of lacquer and handing them to another kid who would hang them on a clothesline affair to drain and dry. There were ventilation fans in the dipping room, but they didn't work. The fumes soon overtook us and we worked stoned out of our minds.

We would clean up at a 55 gal drum of solvent with a hand pump on it and since we were high from the fumes, we had great sport splashing the solvent all over us. Then we would go to the bathroom for a smoke break.

Of course the worst happened and one of the guys caught fire. He survived, but got a different job. That didn't change a thing and we continued to dip boxes, breath toxic fumes, and cover ourselves in toxic and flammable solvent.

Then there was the sawdust pit. This was a large bin in the basement that had chutes from the saws on the floors above that brought sawdust down. I had to go in and shovel the sawdust into burlap sacks while the saws were running and sawdust was pouring down on me. It was so thick that I could hardly see or breathe and the sawdust would stick all over my sweaty body and my skin would constantly itch and burn.

I never heard of a respirator or face mask, but I had seen sand storms in the movies so I would wet my handkerchief and tie it over my face so I could breathe.

I made 75 cents an hour.

Brb unloading heavy chit from trucks from the outside at night while its cold as fukk
Brb you have to be fast or you people look at you like a weak phaggot
Brb you work with criminals and idiots who dont even have a high school degree, 2 of my coworkers are ex-cons, and one of them murdered 3 people and served 8 years in jail
Brb launch is only 20 min
Brb its fukkin nasty as chit, your clothes are full of chit at the end of the day and you smell like dog chit
Brb you are standing up the whole day
Brb you forced to wear guantelets, a helmet and a nasty vest that is full of sweat and nobody washes
Brb payed 11$ an hour because im part time there, the full time guys are payed 15$ an hour ( which is sttill chit for a job that is that bad)
Brb only men work there because the job is hard and nasty as fukk and dont accept women because they know they will quit after 1 hour.

>75c an hour
>$15 an hour

you're closing in on 80 and still browsing Veeky Forums? respect m8.

>I've only had factory jobs for the last 4 years?
Have you ever considered the distinct possibility that you're not smart enough for office jobs? Not everyone is born with the same talents, gifts, or intellect. Learning to make the most of the hand you were dealt is the secret to a happy life.

>office workers
>smart

Nah, I know I'm smarter than these retarded brutes I work with. They're all literally just thugs and druggies that don't even have a highschool diploma.

I am in my second year of earning a computer science degree. I would be looking for an internship in that field, but all of the places around me require I be at least junior level. But I know for a fact I can handle office work. Just need a way to bs the interview so they don't notice I'm an aspie who had what little social skills he had killed by spending so long doing factory jobs.

you're gonna be alright man. You're in ITC, nobody cares if you're aspie as long as you're good.

And besides, hard work and ambition is more important than perfect social skills, and you are obviously hard working and ambitious.

>I know I'm smarter than these retarded brutes I work with.
That's the attitude of a loser.
>I am in my second year of earning a computer science degree.
Get your degree and then see what happens. Right now, you look and sound like a blue collar worker. Nothing wrong with that, but you've got nothing that suggests you're capable of more.

People tend to gravitate towards the jobs they deserve. Someone who's been a factory worker for years has probably found their place.

But there's nothing wrong with aiming higher, if you have the ability, and do the work. So come back after you get that degree and tell then about how you can't get the job you want and that you "know" you're qualified for. Until then, you're just trying to skip steps.

If I've found my place, then why do I feel so out of place? I just don't belong there. I can't relate to anyone there. I'm much smarter than your typical factory worker, but unlike most of the kids my age, I don't have parents to support me through college, so I'm forced to work full time to pay rent and car payments. And the only thing I can get right now is factory work when I have no real experience.

But you're probably right about the skipping steps thing. I feel like I'm about done with the factory step, though. It's served its purpose, but I'm capable of more at this point.

Just recognizing it, as an IT person actually in the field setting up equipment you'll at least have run by it enough to recognize it's an internet protocol (I'm still new at IT and I don't know what it is either desu)

OP LISTEN UP
this guy knows. references you can worry about later..
come up with some credible examples of what your day to day work was like (preferably closely relevant to this role.)
that will make you look credible even if this new role is fairly different to 'what you're used to'

you should open an account on a freelancing website doing any IT related work you know how.
By the time you've finished your degree you can put 1 year of consultation/design/programming etc on your resume even if you only managed to get 1 client for $20 in that time

I've been doing maintenance in an automated warehouse for a couple of years and I'm terrified that's going to be the case when I enter my professional career. I have all the freedom in the world now. If I want to work on personal projects on company time I do so.If I'm not motivated to do maintenance things I get online and work on independent study courses. I've learned how to weld and can do a ton of things I didn't even know existed a few years ago.

I'm setting myself up for a federal career and the only reason I think I can tolerate that is the salary.

i know it has to do with how you get an ip address on a subnet. something to do with arp.

Jesus Christ, and people STILL don't support minimum wage.

smfh

>How do I lie to get an office job when I've only had factory jobs for the last 4 years?

I have worked HR for over 12 years. Serious advice:

Put 'African American' or 'mixed race' as your race on all of your job applications.

For entry level office jobs, this will get you somewhere around 15 to 25 percent more responses from interviewers.

And in all my years in HR, we have NEVER had to validate an applicant's race. Just imagine the cluster fuck of lawsuit that invites.

BRB working full-time hours for above minimum wage, with benefits, company pensions, and so forth.
BRB anyone who can't keep up IS a weak pussy.
BRB bantering with co-workers constantly
BRB taking liberties, playing loud music while we work, taking smoke/drink/phone call breaks
BRB get to act like we own the place because everyone knows how hard we work
BRB not needing to work out because I get paid to work out at work
BRB having a life outside of work that management respect.

Office work sounds nice when the warehouse is -10C or +40C, but I'd miss the banter and the work/life balance.

Have you ever hired anyone who put african anerican but was obviously white? DIdn't think so. Affirmative action works because white people are too scared to try this.