Does Veeky Forums prefer continental or analytic philosophy?

664. A comprehensive history of "analytic philosophy".

1. All philosophy has been analytic, from the beginning of philosophy (quite simply because that's what all philosophy, indeed all thought, consists of: analysis).

2. Nietzsche arrives on the scene. Anglo-Saxons do not understand his analysis, ergo it is not analysis. Also, he made fun of them repeatedly for not being able to understand him. This at least they understood.

3. Anglo-Saxons: "Screw the priggish continentals: We will make our OWN philosophy." (= "The continentals are mean to us, so we won't play with them anymore.")

4. Wittgenstein's On Certainty. Illegible rubbish, but it set the tone for all future "analytic philosophy".

5. No one pays attention to the Anglo-Saxons' illegible rubbish, while book sales and star status of the continentals (many of whom are charlatans indeed but at least not boring) are soaring.

6. Finally Rorty turns around and proclaims the end of "analytic philosophy". "I wish I'd read less of our autistic bullshit and more novels instead."

7. According to the Anglo-Saxons, then, novels are the culmination and ultimate expression of philosophy.

8. And that's where Anglo-Saxon "analytic philosophy" stands to this day. Nothing more than a gigantic reaction movement to Nietzsche calling them names and making fun of them.

At this moment, a brave, rational, positivist analytic philosopher who had read more than 15000 pages of Popper and Wittgenstein and understood the raison d'être of empiricism and fully supported all modern hard sciences stood up and held up the constitution.

”How universal is this text, frenchfag?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied “It's not universal at all, fucking positivist, its 'truth' is rooted in our shared understandings about culture, the subject and the nexus of power and knowledge”

”Wrong. It’s been 225 years since human reason created it. If it was not universal, and post-modern relativism, as you say, is real… then it should be regarded as a myth now”

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of On Grammatology. He stormed out of the room crying those ironic post-modern crocodile tears. There is no doubt that at this point our professor, Michel Foucault, wished he had pulled himself up by his bootstraps and become more than an AIDS ridden sadomasochist interested in fisting. He wished so much that he had some kind of truth to hold on to, but he himself had written to disprove it!

The students applauded and all rolled into American universities that day and accepted Wittgenstein as the end of philosophy. An eagle named “Formal logic” flew into the room and perched atop the copy of "Principa Mathematica" and shed a tear on the hardcover. The last sentence of "Tractatus Logico-Philosophicus" was read several times, and Karl Popper himself showed up and demonstrated how dialectics is nothing but a means of justifying contradictions.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and his "books" were disregarded for all eternity.

I still don't understand the difference.

t. pleb

Analytic philosophy is good when it actually sticks to the old school ontology, epistemology, and metaphysics approach.

Nietzsche was stupid. Abandoning all normative ethics and arguing for transvaluation of ideals is ridiculous. His philosophy indirectly leads to embracing the Dionysian ideal more than the Apollonian ideal, and could be used as justification for a Marquis de Sade approach towards life:
slccphilosophyconference.org/file.php?id=71

Also, wasn't Nietzsche an atomist, lol?

>analytic philosophy

only correct answer, continental started out as valid but it gave birth to all of the half baked postmodernist idiocy that plagues us today

>feelings are stupid lol

Why are Anglo so autistic? Just go study psychology or linguistics if you want science based on human thought

no lol

>your image
>being a liberal cuck student
>not being science/engineering and going into the humanities out of your own will
>not trying to become a useful member of society
I smell some kind of shitty philosophy here like nihilism. Are you a faggot OP?

>useful/contributing member of society meme

This is positively spooktacular.

According to that chart I should have gone into the sciences.

It's the only sensible long term goal. Personal happiness is such an easy goal to achieve nowadays for mentally balanced people (in the category that can afford going to university) that it's not even funny. The only alternative is to be a NE*T potato-sack that does the minimum to achieve his needs and achieves nothing other than being a drain on the system that has allowed us to live life at such a high quality.