ARGHHHHHHHH! Someone stole the hood ornament of my Jaguar S for the THIRD fucking time! What kind of fucking asshole...

ARGHHHHHHHH! Someone stole the hood ornament of my Jaguar S for the THIRD fucking time! What kind of fucking asshole does this?!

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Niggers.

Teens. Wire up your battery to the ornament to your battery and ensure it has rubber separating it from the car. Should give a big enough zap to any fags who think shit like this is funny

I love zap security

Kinda shit that makes you wish a nigga would

Get a dash-cam and keep it running 24/7 or motion activated idk.
Then youll find out it was some dick-hole from your block doing it.

Don't replace the leaper until you move somewhere with a garage.

yeah sure. he would find next day not only his cat is missing but also cam.

Honestly want a Jag just for this

You have no clue what you're talking about, man... You can grab ahold of both terminals of your battery, with wet hands, and ain't shit gonna happen. Its only 12 VDC. It takes over 40 VDC to overcome the resistance of your skin to even feel a tingle, let alone a zap of any kind.

Sorry. Gotta have high voltage and low amperage to scare the shit outta someone without killing them.

Low voltage and high amperage won't do anything to anyone with unbroken skin.

Then all you gotta do is get a second, stronger battery and hook it up directly to the ornament

>not an argument
Also
>incorrect

Get a household transformer from any small application. Put power through the opposite way and it will step up the power to a decent voltage.

You can do this with regular batteries as well, fuck prank for your friends/dick

Dude, that 12v won't do shit.

...

Wire a taser to run off the battery and always be on, then wire said taser to the hood ornament maybe?

I used to take these things in my teenage years, I feel bad about it now.... but a basic toolkit for doing so includes gloves.

It has enough amps to kill you

You need both voltage amperage yo hurt yourself jackass.

12v@ 850 amps is still not enough.

>What kind of fucking asshole does this?!

Teenagers. Zap fails since if they get angry, they will scratch your car up. Rolls Royce has a famous Spirit of Ecstasy hood ornament theft problem, so they create an anti-theft system. Please look at this official video to see how RR makes it harder to steal theirs.

youtube.com/watch?v=aj53HuWBfjE

A zapper fails because they will just wrap a grocery store plastic bag around the thing. Around here, if you go to elaborate anti-theft, the criminals (teens) get insulted and throw rocks. So you learn to not do any rube goldberg device. Just remove the thing if you park in an unsafe area and re-install it when you go to a car show or have guests.

It sucks that teen thieves make it hard to have nice things. Stealing seems to be "normal CASUAL attitude" now. At one safeway often plagued by walk-out thieves., they just walk in, grab something near the door, and walk out. The unarmed security is forced to back off each time due to them pulling out a knife. They take off. They do this over and over successfully because the armed police are always 5 minutes away. That's 4 minutes and 45 seconds too long. The store is frustrated but cannot confront the knife. So shoplifters do it over and over since they only need to fear actual police.

what kind of shitholes do you guys live in?

Yes because he would obviously put it outside his fucking car,

Maybe they should get armed security.

Sparky here. 12v dc won't do shit. You need at least 50v to break the skin, and you need a potential difference to allow current flow and shock someone. So you would have to hope that they touched both the body of the car as well as the ornament with bare skin. Ideal would be around about 230v and 10amps. That way you kill them and they won't steal it again or vandalise your jag

>you need a potential difference
ur standing on the ground

When did they stop teaching how electricity works in public school? 5 years ago?

Yeah, wearing shoes and shit.

That's too much resistance for 12 measly volts to try to go through.

Why the fuck would there be a potential difference between the pozitive of a 12v battery sitting in a car on rubber tires to the ground? We aren't talking about MEN mains

>tfw stole multiple car badges in my youth
>ones sticking out like jaguar or mercedes were the best
carried a little metalsaw for them

Was this out of genuine desire to collect the shiny thing, or was it jealousy, or some form of self righteous idealistic communist crusade against the "rich"?

English Meadows

Too scared to try shit. Figure it doesn't hurt, but I don't want to find the limits of when it will. Then there's people boldly saying shit like 10kW won't do anything. So people just go with whatever sounds right, mostly repeating that all that matters is current.

desire

youtube.com/watch?v=7U4ZYOBzEEs

>Wire up your battery to the ornament to your battery and ensure it has rubber separating it from the car.

Regardless of what device you use to make a high voltage shock (12vdc battery not enough), having a booby trap out in public is a criminal offense. You don't want a criminal conviction to cause you to lose your job or prevent you from getting your next job when your current job runs out.

I know 12v might not be enough to hurt, but theoretically could you wire up 4 to 5 batteries in series in the trunk just for the ornament?

This is the automotive equivalent of running piano wire across hiking trails so that dirtbikers/quad riders get a nasty surprise for shitting up footpaths

>Detroit
>white thief
hang on a minute

Just use a transformer. Only a few winds are needed to raise the voltage to a point where it will conduct with skin

Riding on hiking trails could be argued to be a result of ignorance or incompetence. Cutting off someone's hood ornament requires criminal intent and has a direct victim.

It's science fiction bro.

I like this plan but imagine this, a senior citizen is passing by, slips and falls on your car first gabbing the emblem. BOOM, you're in jail for harrassing and trying to kill a senior citizen.

But he fell onto your property. Killing him with a booby trap doesn't violate the NAP

>Maybe they should get armed security.
No, it is not that these cost more. It is the lawsuit potential of having someone shot. It is far cheaper to continue letting all shoplifters get away if they pull a knife. One 10 million DINDU lawsuit plus all the black lives matter circus publicity would dwarf all the shoplifting losses.

>Killing him with a booby trap
Booby traps on private property or even your own home are illegal. That's the law in my usa state.

mmmmm... seems pretty worth it to me. I'd also rig it so that it would only shock if it was tugged on. And if it goes before a judge, I have a feeling he's going to side with me

shouldn't have parked so close to my jag

It does tho. He didn't initiate force, he fell on the car. Applying force (electricity) from that point is an initiation

ARGH WTF I keep stealing this guy's jaguar off his car and he keeps replacing it. What kind of asshole does that?

>I have a feeling he's going to side with me
Your insurance company might not side with you. Many policies have exemption clauses for deliberately caused criminal activity. If someone sues you, you might have to go it alone on the fines and penalties.