/truckerfag/

They look like they belong on an insect.

Iron skillet is what got me puking and shitting all over the inside of my truck.

>Dat fucked back

>implying my back isnt already fucked from being a grunt in the Army

cant cuck me twice fampai

>armyfag
Aren't you a welfare queen already? Don't you get neetbux from the gubmint? Why do you want a min wage job?

>Implying that being a fatfuck neet sitting at home on the government dole, or a fatfuck otr driver sitting in a trick seat for 14 hours a day eating truck stop food will be any better of lifestyle choices

>Aren't you a welfare queen already? Don't you get neetbux from the gubmint? Why do you want a min wage job?

I don't get any free money from the govt right now and calling military members "welfare queens" is some edgy teenage retardation considering that the govt pays the military to perform a service.

Someone got triggered, welfare fuccboi. Did you hurt your back bending over taking too many cocks up your ass?

RV lights, imo.

>Someone got triggered, welfare fuccboi. Did you hurt your back bending over taking too many cocks up your ass?

>this response
>i'm the triggered one

lel

>Shitty Troll appears

>I don't get any free money from the govt right now and calling military members "welfare queens" is some edgy teenage retardation considering that the govt pays the military to perform a service.

He's right though, you're a welfare queen.

But by all means keep crying about it my man.

>not receiving welfare
>a welfare queen

that makes you one too bud.

That's fine, the government is trying to outlaw all conv noses by 2018 anyway, so you won't have to look at them much longer

I'm never getting out of the K hole. I did too much.

Have a (k).

Arrrrrrrgggghhhhh

>[Citation Needed]

They can have my conventional chassis when they pry it from my cold dead hands.

Help truckerfags , ive driven nothing but class b vehicles but have an oppurtunity to do home daily class A runs twice a week

I barely backed the trailer and the instructor felt bad for me. Ill get two days training on the route. Someone help

>TFG: off topic shitposting

In 2018, all combination vehicles on the road have to average 20% better fuel economy AND 20% less emissions than what was standard in 2010. Conv noses just can't compete with slope noses. The difference in aerodynamics is killing them.

Western Star 4800 is one of my favorite trucks right up there with a Pete 281 needlenose

Holy fuck the bad luck of some of those people. Nigga almost got away

are lot lizards real or just a legend

A real legend.

They exist. Quite common in some places, non-existent in others. The TA in Ontario, CA always has them walking around. Remember, curtains up, don't make eye-contact, lest they slither, or waddle, towards you.

Srs Veeky Forums

Any tips would help

Help with what? You told a story, but didn't ask anything.

Everything but the salad is microwaved

Get out and look
Watch the tandems
Park early
Don't hit anything

Do you guys carry? Are there corporate policies against it?

How to back and not look like a retard.

How to watch out for four wheelers behind,around trailer.

One knocked on my door last night and interrupted my touchy feel-good time, so I turned her in to the truck stop and now she's cooking on the roller dog grills

>How to back
Get Out And Look
>How to watch out for four wheelers on road
Get Out And Look

Pepsi won't allow it. Technically I shouldn't even have my box cutter. I'm also not supposed to smoke in the truck but that will never stop either.

Impostor, I would never use a trip code!
Be sure to post antics, pics preferably. Reminds me, the fuck ever happened to NCFag?
Order from the menu, never the buffet. You'll wind up like buttsplosion-user.
See?
Don't give him any (You)s. He a shit at his job.
This guy gets it.
The best help is to git gud. Steer towards trouble (which is where the trailer's ass is going in your mirrors) to straighten out, and always get out and look.
Could this be the skilled troll? Sauce, fool.
Generally corporate policies prohibiting firearms in the truck, and a lot of places prohibit them on the property, if that matters at all. Given states' wildly varying laws on the matter, I've chosen to arm myself with a telescoping steel baton and wishing upon shooting stars.

This should be your starting position, unless you can get aligned straight. Note the approach path - ALWAYS park near-side. You can't see shit while backing in far-side (parking spot on your right). Approach the spot as close as possible. When the middle of your trailer passes the spot, turn hard right. Once the back end is starting to align, turn hard left. Your goal is this set up.
>seatbelt off
>window down
>left hand on outside of door, leaning through window
>head out window, looking back
>Aim with the trailer's rear-left outside wheel. It takes the tightest curve, so if it clears so will everything else on your left side.
>DON'T FORGET that you have a right side; if unsure, get out and check your clearance
>stay as close as possible on the left; you have better visibility from the driver's seat, and it leaves more room on the right
>use no throttle, only clutch; you do not need throttle at all while backing
>don't be shy, use all the room available. Block the entire road/alley, fuck everyone else, they can wait

Sometimes, your position is just fucked and nothing you do can save it. Give up, go around and start your approach again.

How do you guys not know this? I thought it was pretty common knowledge. Just Google "finaltrucksreport.pdf" the first link is a WhiteHouse.gov link

...

...

...

...

>Gommon knowledge :DDD

>Amerigan bresident's house's website :DDDDD

>Just type x_c50.tiff_finaltruckersreporty001596i79235ac_001-13-01-15.doc into askjeeves.com and it will be the nineteenth article from the bottom :DDDDDD

>jus dybe x_c50.tiff_finaltruckersreporty001596i79235ac_001-13-01-15.doc indo asgjeebs.gom and id wil b de ninedenth ardigle vrom de boddom :DDDDDD

t. triggered long nose dinosaur facing extinction

That is so helpful. I hate my illiterate trainer.

>Be sure to post antics, pics preferably. Reminds me, the fuck ever happened to NCFag?

Well today was my first day, did my new hire paperwork, and met the day shift, they seem nice but I'm surprised by the amount of morbidly obese people they have working for them.

GM said the night shift is repeatedly fucking up so he put me on it to "bring in some new blood", I would think most truck stop hi-jinks happen between 12am-8am, right?

Alright it's time for truck stop power rankings

1. Petrol
2. TA
3. Flying J
4. Love's
5. Pilot
6. ???????

Discuss.

I'd wager as much, or at least the hijinks increase in volume and intensity during the late afternoon and leading into the night, as that's when all the truckers come in to roost.

>Imblying this isnd aerodynamig :DDDDD

>Wands to drive a space trug insdead of a glassig looging trug :DDDD

>1 Rest Areas
>2 Mom and Pop truck stops
>3 Petro
>4 All Else
>…
>9001 TA
I swear to god fucking 60% of every TA's parking spaces are 'Reserved' $14/day bullshit.

Mom and pop places aren't usually places you want to take a dump in my experience. Gross bathrooms.

Also no wide screen TV with the game or Bruce Willis saving planet from asteroid

TA
>I swear to god fucking 60% of every TA's parking spaces are 'Reserved' $14/day bullshit.

Reminds me of something the floor manager told me today.

>If you splash old oil all over a customers engine compartment while doing an oil change be sure to try and up-sell a pressure washer cleaning for some extra $$$

Really thankful they are giving me a chance there but that sounds sort of Jewish to be desu

>Not dropping your deuces at rest areas or on your shower break
>Watching TV
I don't understand why I enjoy this job sometimes. Today I literally woke up, drove to the receiver, shitposted for an hour while unloading, drove to the next shipper, shitposted for an hour while loading, drove to a Pilot to fuel up, at some fast food, drove for six hours to this rest area, shitposted for an hour before calling it a night. I should get a basic feature phone and put this smartphone in a bag. Maybe then I'd actually play games or talk to people instead of sleep and drive with occasional shitposting wasting what precious little free time I have.

What do you faggots think about Allie Knight?

>tfw no pale skinnyfat moderately big titted gf to drive me all over the country while i smoke weed and browse Veeky Forums in her comfy bed

youtube.com/watch?v=xgq0vQ0Gmbs

Ultimate. Independent
1. comfy as fuck dirt lot that's got three trucks in it at 0300
2. Petro
3. New Loves
4. The few TAs that have opened in the past couple years
5. Flying J
6. Old TAs
7. Walmart
8. Old Loves
9. Pilot

>pic related 2nd best stop on i44 in Missouri

Allie annoying.
Based Jack and his dry humor and creaky volvo.

youtu.be/845VlHMW7xQ

>Not being flatbed and done by 3pm everyday

>not being able to manage your clock and day to park before noon

>Driving all night

>rookie doesn't know the 8 hour recap trick yet

>Desire to know more intensifies

Walmart master race. Petro is good but most don't sell beer. I just love how Petro is layed out and big, so driver friendly. Flying J is your most vanilla average truck stop. It's shit but you can usually do worse. Loves/ Pilot is hit and miss and usually way too small. I don't stop at TA because I'm not a richfag. Indies are hit and miss but at the end of the day all I really ask for is a spot to legally park my truck and get a good night's rest. I don't think that's too much to ask for, but sometimes it's hard to come by.

>saw this badass on I-85s towards Atlanta

>Doing anything besides shitposting and frantically refreshing Clover for precious (You)s during free time

>Incoherent screeching begins

>Spurdo_Fug.jpg

Well, I can't get in for orientation until next week with the new company, so I guess I will stick it out for a week and get paid a little bit more instead of having a week of nothing.

>Hit pot hole or speed bump
>$20k repair bill

It amazes me how every time my teammate farts, it sounds like it's nothing but pure water splashing out his ass. Like they last for more than 10 seconds and the amount of plops, pops, and so on is absolutely disgusting. There is no way in hell he isn't shitting himself.

>it amazes me how every time my teammate farts, it sounds like it's nothing but pure water splashing out his ass. Like they last for more than 10 seconds and the amount of plops, pops, and so on is absolutely disgusting. There is no way in hell he isn't shitting himself.

He's shitting himself every time and is almost certainly wearing some sort of adult incontinence apparel.

That will be you in 15 years user, congrats m8.

>this is the life you chose

He doesn't wear diapers, he wears fucking pink lacy thongs. He is definitely shitting himself. These aren't farts, they're small escapes of diarrhea.

>leaving the TA service station I just got hired at
>trash can at the corner of the building
>when I get about 50 feet from it I'm hit with the overpowering stench of rancid old man piss
>think back to /tfg/
>that trash can is probably full to the brim with truckers piss bottles 24/7

Welcome to Hell.

>Welcome to Hell.

Hell would be doing cab electrical repairs in a sleeper with bedbugs.

What are u doin with ur life m8

Grubs m8. I at least empty my piss bottle in the shower/toilet and rinse it out. Then throw it in the bin.

7pm straya time and I'm the only truck parked up at the truck stop. It's easy mode truckin here.

I also bought some shitty american beer, it does the job I spose.

K

Posting alcohol in your truck upsets the americans. It reminds them that they really dont have freedumbs.

>easy mode truckin
I dunno. Majority have to use shitty viesa (swamp box cooler). If you're lucky you get an icepak/apu.

>Trucker Gundam ver. Ka
Should be: ver K

It's a small price to pay to be able to live in a global superpower. You can drink all the cheap horse piss you want, we've got more important things to do.

You upset the murricans.

>we've got more important things to do
like get rubber gloves shoved up your butthole by tsa at every state border?

>we've got more important things to do.
Like not be home every weekend?

Ayyy lmao

6 tasteless beers of the very best usa had to offer. Actually it was very sweet for a lager and had no bitterness like beer should.

Questioning my current choice of work, really.

>we've got more important things to do.
like elect clowns into power, yeah you guys are real smart. Just dumb sheep who are scared into corrals.

You can always fall back onto cocks.

>we've got more important things to do.

like sign truck leases

L M A O
M
A
O

only in murrica, home of the jew

What, become the first male lot lizard?

You sure won't be the first, my friend.

you might do well, alot of us are secretly homo. just look at ur faggot co driver. he wants the d bad

I don't feel like setting a PR for deadlifting his gut to find the micropenis