Where is the delightful sound of continuous ear rupturing explosions?

D00t you just cuntvinced me to bai a Tessle.

93% remaining range at 180k km (120k mi), that's excellente. WAY better than I anticipatized.

Your laptop and cell phone Li-Ion battz lose charge capacity way worse, everyone's experienced it with phones and iPods et kaytera

Yes I am an altism

Muted by the sounds of "environment friendly" people jerking each other off

I'll drive my classix through a college town once every month or so,

the chicks always give dirty looks.

Don't mind that, but they really need to find a designer because Teslas have no character at all, and the interiors are the most bland I've ever seen on a modern car.

Replaced by fake engine noise

Would teslas sound cooler if they made the loud as fuck crackle a tesla coil makes?

Damn right they would. They should shoot lightning out of "tailpipes" too.

Tesla, please read and incorporate.

the redesigned front end honestly looks retarded.

I understand it doesn't need a grille but jesus at least proportion everything correctly before releasing it.

I'm actually family friends with this guy and his dad.

AMA

Are they nice people?

Both would give you the shirt off their back if you asked. Good ol' redneck boys.

The father of the kid owns one of the biggest tractor and tractor supply factories in NC, has had the land forever, passed down through generations all that. His father recently died and left him and his son both a fortune, they were already fairly wealthy before though.

The father recently got the newer P100, and just gave his last tesla to his son. Apparently the new one blows the old one away.

The P100D with Ludicrous+ is supposedly capable of 2.4s 0-60.

I'm sure at some point it actually gets dangerous to give people quicker acceleration. I've heard of people hurting themselves in Tesla's.

Identical batteries perform differently.

95% of the smallest battery size offered is still over 200 miles of range.

>tfw no pollution-spewing carbed rotary to fill the one-way streets with the scent of unburned fuel

So is this board finally accepting the supperority of electric vehicles

where is the delightful experience of being able to drive moderately quickly without your vehicle overheating & limiting power?

0 to 60 in 2.4 seconds to slow for you?

Or are you trying to say Tesla's can't maintain a high speed of travel which is unfactual.

forums.tesla.com/forum/forums/p90d-overheating

insideevs.com/expected-tesla-model-s-fails-lap-nurburgring-full-power-video/

shiftinglanes.com/2016/09/the-tesla-model-s-p85d-is-the-most-boring-track-car-ever-made/

cleantechnica.com/2016/06/19/porsche-product-manager/

tgdaily.com/startups/131956-the-problem-with-tesla-they-make-performance-buyers-look-stupid

carscoops.com/2016/06/porsche-exex-says-upcoming-electric-car.html

>tesla
>performance

a y y l m a o

>only 180km

Thats awful, my dinky civic gets 400 miles to the tank

they can. for a whole 15 minutes.

>
>The P100D with Ludicrous+ is supposedly capable of 2.4s 0-60.
>I'm sure at some point it actually gets dangerous to give people quicker acceleration. I've heard of people hurting themselves in Tesla's.

how can gas cars even compete?

M8 this thing couldn't go full throttle for 3 out of the 7 minutes it takes going around nurburgring

What makes you think that it's somehow not going to catch fire again in the hands of a civilian?

We already can, a Subaru wrx can do the same 0-60 time

or if we want to use real numbers they can travel at 80 mph until the battery runs dry.

>93% remaining range at 180k km (120k mi), that's excellente. WAY better than I anticipatized.
Those are fringe results. The majority of people are losing to 93% extremely early on at sub 60k

from your own sources you can see the tesla cant sustain speeds of around 120+ mph for very long. Also no one drives on roads at speeds over 120 mph for very long.

Whats the problem?

The fact r hat it's sitting the bed in situations where no other car is sitting the bed

>this retard thinks 5 seconds is close enough to 2.4 to be called the same thing

0-60specs.com/subaru-wrx-0-60-times/

it also gets 90-100 MPGe where as other cars are still fighting to get 30. Wouldnt you say every car except Tesla are now shitting the bed?

fueleconomy.gov/feg/bymodel/2015_Tesla_Model_S.shtml

E V E R Y S I N G L E competitor to the tesla can in fact sustain speeds of 120mph+ for a period that is significantly longer

>5 series/m5
>a7/s7/rs7
>a6/s6
>e-class
>s-class

Competitors? Thats funny because no other car manufacturer is a competitor to Tesla. No one except Tesla is capable of making desirable electric vehicles.

>Where is the delightful sound of continuous ear rupturing explosions?
this is unironically my complaint

well, in short form, anyway

you should try steam engines, its incredible!

I'm quite fond of them, yes.

yeah, maybe you're right.

no respectable auto manufacturer will brag about performance figures that can't be put to use for more than 15 minutes at a time

no respectable auto manufacturer will market a car as """luxury""" with a bare bones interior built to terrible standards

no respectable auto manufacturer will let a luxury sedan leave the factory with panel gaps as wide as the grand canyon

no respectable auto manufacturer will let a car out of the factory knowing it has major performance issues

Yeah I guess respectable car manufacturers have high satisfaction rates and a couple hundred thousand people lining up to purchase unreleased models.

insideevs.com/consumer-reports-tesla-model-s-rated-1-in-customer-satisfaction/

electrek.co/2016/08/05/tesla-model-3-reservations-400000-cash-flow-customer-deposits/

>no respectable auto manufacturer will let a car out of the factory knowing it has major performance issues
the vast majority of auto manufacturers have done this for a variety of reasons
teslas can suck my nuts but you're just being silly now

it's almost like they're purely a status symbol with no real use compared to ACTUAL luxury/performance cars?

nah, that can't be it.

Yeah just a status symbol with over 90 MPGe, better then 5 star safety rating, autonomous capabilities, nationwide free charging network, and fastest 0 to 60 speed production vehicle ever created.

Definitely the only thing people care about is having a status symbol.

Every American auto manufacturer is guilty of all these things.

Usually GM, multiple at a time.

I don't know about you guys but when I commute to work I do so by speeding until the point of a felony.

I drive a 76 F100 to college. No one bats an eye.

>gm makes luxury/performance sedans
>inb4 he thinks the cts-v/ats-v are luxury/performance sedans

top kek

gm is second to tesla in terms of shit build quality & god awful interiors

>no real use

• Seating for seven
• 95.1 cubic feet of interior volume
• 58.1 cu ft of rear load-bay volume
+ A little more in the front trunk

>Tesla interior
>awful

u wot m8

hes just some old boomer that cant figure out touchsceens

touchscreens are shit tho

>I like my controls to wear down, have the text rub off, and stop working.

I think the pros outweigh the cons.

mfw future generations will marvel at the still-functioning interface of my Banana MePhone, whose rugged interface is known worldwide for shrugging off damage

mfw my controls are better because they give no tactile feedback

That's the Apple effect.
Musk is a phenomenal salesman with the ability to inspire people with his product much like Steve Jobs was.

But strapping a bunch of laptop batteries to a chassis and calling that innovative is a bit of a stretch. At least they are using the constructive capabilities of an electric vehicle to enhance crash safety.
Which is needed when your Autopilot can't drive autonomously unless you want to end up under a truck, not to mention that safety relevant features such as hazard lights don't have their own switch but need to be accessed over the center touch screen that can only be operated with bare fingers.
At least they fixed the problem of cars burning to a crisp while charging overnight.
Providing a charging network and some actually working gadgets is the least thing you can expect from a car company that senselessly throws money at their problems and still releases half-assed products.

I like Tesla though. Their cars are overrated but I like that they pursue battery research, because that's where real innovation lies.

>Autopilot can't drive autonomously unless you want to end up under a truck

reuters.com/article/us-tesla-safety-idUSKBN1532F8?il=0

twitter.com/elonmusk/status/822129092036206592

>the center touch screen that can only be operated with bare fingers

youtube.com/watch?v=jW4sC5MwTn0

>At least they fixed the problem of cars burning to a crisp while charging overnight.

news.nationalgeographic.com/news/energy/2013/12/131206-tesla-car-fire-probe/

>releases half-assed products

insideevs.com/consumer-reports-tesla-model-s-rated-1-in-customer-satisfaction/

We done here?

>An article that says Teslas glorified lane-keeping assistant is literally unable to spot what's in front of it and would have required driver's help.
So is it autonomous or not? Because if it needs my help, it's not a Autopilot.

>a tweet
Stop the presses.The prophet has spoken.

>a commercial for smartphone gloves
Great. Doesn't change the laws in countries that require cars to have a separate designated hazard light switch.

>an article that confirms cars can burn
Who would have thought?

>an article that shows Teslas marketing is working
Did you know that Apple is leading in customer satisfaction for computers?

Try harder.

Lmao delusional tesla famboy getting btfo
Running out of counter arguments in your "defending teslashit: starter pack"? Lmao

LITERALLY
SLOWER
THAN
A
RANGE ROVER
ON
A
TRACK

people will feel so dumb in 15 years for falling for the Tesla meme.

>>an article that confirms cars can burn
>Who would have thought?
An article that shows how dangerous the batteries can undergo conflagration because unlike gas vehicles these tesla s have little to protect the driver or others from rapid unexpected deconstruction of their car

well hot damn that's some delusion

>So is it autonomous or not? Because if it needs my help, it's not a Autopilot.
youtube.com/watch?v=PUw_DMaQ264

>a tweet
Just referencing a recent report
electrek.co/2017/01/19/tesla-crash-rate-autopilot-nhtsa/

>Great. Doesn't change the laws in countries that require cars to have a separate designated hazard light switch.
This video is great because it explain why you are wrong in simple and slow language.
youtube.com/watch?v=ymZKUuASlDY

>an article that confirms cars can burn
Well it shows that Tesla's catch fire at a rate less then other cars, maybe because they don't function though a series of explosions.

>an article that shows Teslas marketing is working
What marketing?
extole.com/blog/tesla-referral-program-how-to-grow-with-0-marketing-budget/

Also apple has about an 80% satisfaction rating, Tesla is at 91%. Funny how that works out since apple spends about 2 billion a year on advertising.
Think carefully about your arguments and try again.

Nice shifting the goal posts

This thing still has no range comparatively and can't fuel up from near 0 to full in sub 5 minutes

over 200 miles of range and can fuel in 30 minutes, which is within the amount of time a stop for food would take on a long trip. How many times in the last year did you drive for over 200 miles without stopping?

>over 200 miles of range and can fuel in 30 minutes, which is within the amount of time a stop for food would take on a long trip. How many times in the last year did you drive for over 200 miles without stopping?
Thats fucking garbage, my civic has a 400 mile range

You're literally defending this short ass range which wouldn't get me to work and back 15 minutes a day for 5 days a week without needing to sit idle for a half hour

>You're literally defending this short ass range which wouldn't get me to work and back 15 minutes a day for 5 days a week without needing to sit idle for a half hour

I think you have a fundamental misunderstanding about EV's. See when you get home and your car is just 'sitting' there, thats a great time to plug it in! That way every morning you leave for work with a full tank, wow!

Fucking crazy i know.

>no its OK guys you just have to stop and charge quadruple the number of times and charge for up to a half hour just to do somrthing

Please call me when battery energy density beats gasoline

Or I don't have to plug in my civic at all and I refuel it once every 2 weeks

Or if I do go somewhere remotely far and 100 miles isn't far at all there's no fucking guarantee the tesla will even be able to charge where ever I'm going because it's such a useless piece of shit

I think you would find taking the 2 seconds to plug your car in is less time consuming then going to a gas station once once in a while

> there's no fucking guarantee the tesla will even be able to charge where ever I'm going

Yes there is, see pic related.

Want to try moving those goal posts again? Maybe it will work this time.

or you plug it in when you get home and never have to visit a station ever again because your car has a full tank every single morning.

If i Made a gas station map in the same way you did it would blot out the entire country

Don't even think for a moment that "what if I can't make it there, or what if I can't charge it there" isn't an issue because it's a huge fucking issue still because no one is doing it

Just looking at where I live in upstate NY along i90 there is only 3 fucking charge stations? One in Albany, one west of Amsterdam and one near the finger lakes?

Thats fucking dog shit I'm not always going to the capitol, nor Amsterdam nor the fucking finger lakes in the middle of but fuck no where

The US is huge and your points on the map is like pepper on a white piece of paper

Its not an issue for Tesla's. If you put in a destination that is outside your range, it will route you from charger to charger as needed. It requires zero planing or thought, which sounds like something you could really use.

>Tesla cucks are limited to where they can go because fuck all charging stations
Lmao, no user you can't go through those mountains and visit the town you grew up in, you have to follow this highway instead and stop off at a fagass charge station. Enjoy your not so scenic trip!

No your not going to those places are you. I bet your going to work. I bet your place of work is pretty close. Why are scared of running out of charge when only driving 10 miles?

>having to go from charger to charger meanwhile my car can just go right there already

My civic ex was 14k, this tesla is over 35k,bot only does it have less than half the range but even after all maintenance, gas costs and shit I would never come close to the savings of what the tesla would offer in electricity costs. It relies on special and proprietary charging stations that its forced to cling to because it's got no fucking range for even mild to moderate travel and its highly prone to conflagration should a driver be even remotely aggressive with it.

Tesla charge stations are few and far for literally anyone who doesn't live in a city and it's forced to charge every day just to keep up with other cars. Even then it takes 6 times longer to go from 0-100% charge and over time will suffer battery degradation making its range up to 10% less over the first 40k miles and even worse beyond 80k. There are virtually no advantages to this car over similar vehicles and its presence currently is nothing more than overzealous admiration and hype For being different

Congratulations you found the single issue with Tesla's. Great now that we know Tesla's are greater then ICE's at everything else, I cant image you or anyone else would be able to take the position that Tesla's are over inferior.

Glad we were able to come to an agreement here.

>dig racing
lmao roll racing is way more fun.
Tesla would get murdered by pretty much everything in a 40 or 60 roll race.

I work 15 minutes away by highway which turns Into about 40 miles round trip. The one tesla station in Albany isn't anywhere near my work it's on the other side of town which is completely unusable. The only place in range for any of my local destinations is my own home which is shit for a car and it has no ability to traverse or versatility beyond 100 miles which is testimony to its poor performance as I name plenty of places in upstate NY I can go where there will be no charging station at all. Even then I'll be forced to wait a half hour just for it to charge assuming the charging station is at or near my destination

Charge in your fucking home
Leaving your fucking home with 200 miles range
Return to your fucking home after driving less then 200 miles
Charge in your fucking home

This is not hard to understand.

>it'll plan a route
>no planning needed
That sounds like it needs lots of planning and limitations to my travels hindering my ability to go anywhere not implicitly mainstream

Congrats you contradicted your self

>Leaving your fucking home with 200 miles range
No its 100 miles, if my destination doesn't have a charging port, (pro tip it fucking won't ) then my actual range from home is only 100 miles which is only 1 hour 30 minutes of driving at best

>Return to your fucking home after driving less then 200 miles
>Charge in your fucking home
If the car has a max range of 200 miles, how can I go 200 miles from home then somehow make it back to charge?

i guess you will have to stop and grab a coffee as your charges for 15 minutes then you poor baby

>implying the coffee shop had a charging port
Pro tip it fucking won't

Meanwhile my civic has a 400 mile max range which means I can go 200 miles from home without fueling up again or I just visit a gas station. Pro tip that coffee shop has a way better chance of having a gas station near it than a proprietary tesla charging station

wont be long until digital sound takes over and you can make an electric car sound like anything you want

roll racing is for retarded ricers

why does Veeky Forums hate Tesla?

the fully loaded model s goes ridiculously fast and accelerates fast. you all are just poorfags being salty about your slow shitbox

Veeky Forums pretends theyd rather have a 200hp straight piped V8 to be edgy in than a good car tho and its funny

>Muh respectability

It goes ludicrously fast.

It doesn't currently. You have to go to the Elon approved coffee shops that have a charger

Until batteries and electric motors get lighter, electric cars will never be "fast".

he said as the Model S P100D reached 60 mph in 2.3 seconds.

Try going around a corner.