Help me cheat my way out of work

>be me, 19, in college
>still living at home because I'm a fuck up in community college
>trying to find a shitty part time job to pay for gas, weed and beer
>every job I look at online looks repulsive
>having to wear a uniform, deal with faggots all day, get bossed around by a faggot, etc.
>the idea of trying my hand at another shit retail job is disgusting to me
So Veeky Forums, how do I (semi) legally make at least $200 a week without having any real responsibility or having to deal with faggot customers?

Go pawn your parents jewelry. Use the proceeds to buy kneepads and get to sucking dick.

Stop spending money on weed and beer. Actually take school seriously. I have a feeling you know what you should be doing but choose not to. So just kys if you can't motivate yourself to not be a degenerate.

How hard is it to get a job that pays 50k+

save money, work your ass off for two years and then start investing?

there's no magic recipe, you either have 10k on you or your parents or get that ass working bitch

you can try to suck dicks (semi) legally.

>having to wear a uniform, deal with faggots all day, get bossed around by a faggot, etc.

were you seriously born yesterday? yeah...people work for other people cause like...other people started the business...and like...people wear uniforms for like.....reasons dude.....

anyway, good luck with your magical special snowflake money pot. you'll rise above all those other faggots, really you will. you don't have to do nothin u dont want little baby

Is work really that fucking hard? I've been working since I was 16- it was 6 years of bullshit before I got a job that wasn't absolute trash.

this board is filled with kids and teenagers stuck on their first job.

First jobs sucks, it takes a while before it gets tolerable. People here just can't seem to deal with it.

Fine.

If you don't want to work but still make money, you could look into tutoring. Usually you can get paid about $20/hr if you find any rich kids.

Outside of that, you could steal shit. No one's going to be hiring you on as an engineer or any position of importance without prior experience or a stellar GPA. If you can keep your GPA above a 3.5 (in a good major) you can get an internship sophomore year which could net you like $20/hr,

You could also invest, but I'm willing to bet you don't have any fucking money.

My old college roommate gave blood. He made like 190 every two weeks from that.

I'm going to have to level with you though man, people who don't work are pieces of shit. Everyone I know who didn't have a job during college went off to do mediocre things with shitty degrees- unless they studied STEM ofc, but that's just because STEM is a guaranteed job. The easiest way to make money is through work. No MLM bullshit, no putting ads in the paper for shit you can't do and definitely not trying to "hustle" for whatever dumb shit you think you're great at.

Pick a shitty customer service job and don't be inept and you'll be a manager in 3 years if you don't suck.

Suck a ton of dicks or something? Become your local phamer's personal fleshlight?

Forex bro. Download mt4 and start practicing for free.

>a job that pays 50k+
Literally impossible if you're a 20 something NEET with no experience. Might as well just get a part time wagecuck job and buy lottery tickets and penny stocks

OP here. Thanks for the advice, faggots. I'd rather just not work. Seems like a waste of time IMO.

Get really really good at drawing furry porn. Those commission prices get way up there, especially if you start drawing fetish stuff.

Popular artists can make probably $60 off a commission, and you could probably finish a couple in a week.

>having to wear a uniform
Yes, because a job that requires you to spend all your hard earned money on clothes to be worn to work is a good thing.
Wear the fucking uniform and save money.

im 23 and made 96k last year. 3rd year steamfitter apprentice. Works tough but at least I don't deal with fucktard customers. I just take my prints, tools, materials, and get to work.

Work at UPS, nightshift.
$300+ a week for 20 hrs a week.
It was literally designed for students.
Been there 10 years myself.
No customers to deal with is the best thing about it.

>wah wah I'm am entitled millenials give me money for doing nothing

>Pick a shitty customer service job and don't be inept and you'll be a manager in 3 years if you don't suck.
That's brilliant for most people who aren't aware that there are people who earn a manager's yearly salary in a week

>Pick a shitty customer service job and don't be inept and you'll be a manager in 3 years if you don't suck

>do this
>be best employee there and carrying my team
>job only allows 4 managers and they've all been there since the store opened so even if they fuck up they wont get fired
>when i walk in the manager just give me their sign ins and I run the store
>offer to put me in the hood with the store that gets robbed once a week
>ask for raise but they say the minimum wage increase WAS a raise

dont do this.

He's onto something there. Being an apprentice past the first year of disgustingly low pay actually has a nice wage. I'm just waiting for my first year to come to an end to hit the next one. So OP, if you're really in a pickle and need to get money try an apprenticeshit. It pays at around the amount that you want and you'll be entitled to some cool shit as you're still learning. Also they'll take anyone who can write their own name and knows what numbers are. No experience required.

Don't compare me to him

Deliver pizza or Chinese food
250 a week easy if the place is busy

on weekends I make 20$ an hour

>Doesnt want to work
>Only wants to buy beer and weed

Absolute degeneracy

/biz is not for you

Epic Bleach XD

Fix your brain and have some self control otherwise KYS.

>all these cuckolds telling him to get a wageslave job

Jesus, just kill yourselves. Internet money or death.

Pretty much this. You've wired your brain to be stuck on shit habits. Once you quit your lowlife tendencies you'll look back and think wtf was I doing. Start now don't wast time.

why doesn't he just sell weed and beer

>I'll work my ass off for the privilege of competing with baljee subramaniam for $0.02 per hour.

I'm not talking about cuck shit like web development or upworker trash. Instagram, Facebook, Youtube channels, Twitch streaming. If you aren't making money there, you are literally a cuckold and will never earn respect.

>you are literally a cuckold and will never earn respect.
personally I'd much rather have money.

>internet money or death
>money
What did you think we were talking about?

I assume you're joking.
or your last name is subramaniam

I'm not joking at all. You're a cuck if you think it's fine to be slaving away making somebody else rich, while popular youtubers, instagram pages, twitch streamers, or facebook pages can earn hundreds of thousands of dollars in a single night, even from a single post.

I don't slave and I'm not making anyone else rich.

I've just never seen these incredible internet moneys in real life.

I suspect your odds of making that kind of money are a bit slimmer than playing professional basketball.

Look for a teaching assistant jobs at your local K-12 schools ?

I'm a degreefag who is unsatisfied with his field and income. I'm interested in the idea of going into a skilled trade but I don't know where to begin. How does an apprenticeship work, and which fields have the most demand?

Annoy your coworkers and bosses. Get them to fire you for a silly reason. Apply for unemployment. You probably wont get paid for 2 months due to the way the unemployment process works with appeals and shit. You might make a couple bucks, but it's not really about that.

If/when you get approved for unemployment after the fact-finding interview, and before the appeals process (which it may not even get to the appeals process if you are lucky) - you have about a month long window to apply for trade courses through community colleges and/or through other WIOA (google it) directed plans. The process isn't easy because most states in the U.S. didn't bother to implement anything regarding WIOA because the have been procrastinating since 2014 , but you could in theory go learn how to weld, learn electrical work, nursing, machine operating, etc. (I'm going through the process right now to become an electrician) or take classes for free for a certain amount of time at a community college.

The unemployment part helps tremendously but I believe there are options if you have little to no income.

There are jobs out in Iowa (U.S.) that will start you off with that but a decent percentage of that 50k is from overtime earned while working a swing shift in not-so-great working conditions. I did it for 3 years at a place called Grain Processing Corporation through a temp agency. Most people worked with the idea that they could work there until they were 65 or something, I saved most of my income.

>So Veeky Forums, how do I (semi) legally make at least $200 a week without having any real responsibility or having to deal with faggot customers?
Just ask your parents to give you $200 a week.

Bio-technologists make bank and most employers look for 2 year associate degrees only. It's a trade just less physical shit than say a carpenter or electrician. But if you opt to do the ladder; most unions require some education or experience before signing you on for an apprenticeship which often includes additional classes (expenses payed) and a set amount of hours in the field (something around 2k hours) so you'll be very busy.

Also consider googling unions for specific trades near your area and consider speaking with them about a chance to get into their apprentice program.