Being tailgated at night

as that video made it clear enough
why brakecheck when you can go fast and not die
(lel the captcha was close call)

i like how the car has niggermusic balsting inside it
didnt expect anything else from white trash

>watches video
>doesn't realize I'm trolling
wrong, you expected a nig

at first i truly did
but its white trash
basically white niggers
i bit the bait because im bored
got nothing to do and dont feel like wanking

watch some kino

CHOO CHOO MOTHERFUCKER

movies are boring tho
already watched everything from monty python
got any comedy recommendations?

i meant this to

>monty python
that isn't kino
try The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)

oh, actually scrap my recommendation, that isn't comedy (well, it has some dark comedy undertones to it but that's it)
Try The Closet (2001), original title Le placard

>read this thread while being driven in an E-class
>BMW M6 passes us well above the limit, downshifts, and slams the gas just to make sure we pay attention to him
Pottery. Why are they so insecure?

>floor my shitbox
>turns out it was a diesel
top kek

I'l take "things that never happened" for 500, alex

Most annoying shit ever.

>driving home from work late at night
>in Miata
>suddenly someone's tailgating me hard
>can't fucking see because HIDs
>this continues for like 15 minutes
>get sick of being blinded by this guy's headlights
>lightly tap my brakes a few times just to activate the lights
>suddenly cherries and berries
>goddammit
>pull over
>"user why did you think it was a good idea to brake check a police officer?"
>get let off with a warning for having "obstructive" black ice tree dangling from my rear view mirror

If they're gonna pull you over, they need to just get it done instead of tailgating the whole time.

>not simulating a breakdown
I have a switch that sprays some unburnt fuel into the exhaust to make smoke

>in an e class
How much do you want to bet that user is in a early 2000s eclass shit box he got for 1k off Craigslist?

It's a 2013 cabrio with the 4.7L twin turbo

I meant about the BMW guy doing that, him having an E class isn't surprising, specially there in the US where they're fairly cheap compared to here and where you can lease a car that's not a utility vehicle for a company

>on the way home
>buddy driving e60 525 shitbox
>dark out, cant see
>car gets on highway beside us
>seems like he wants to get in left lane
>buddy accelerates to get around guy and let him over
>guy speeds up with us
>finally get over
>doing about 100
>bi doo bi doo
>claims his radar is broken and checks to see if we were drunk
>says we seem like nice guys, gives ticket for "exceeding the posted limit"
shitbox doesnt have exhaust on right now, and the front bumper is also off for the time being, he said nothing.

Stop for a cat. Give zero fucks that retard hit me and fucked up his car.

Oh look, a new scratch on the back bumper.

It's not considered tailgating if you can still see their headlights.

>wait for next hill
>crest hill, turn off lights
>wait for impact & insurance info swap

Think to myself "damn they must have a hard time seeing, I better slow down so they can use my brights to see better"

Same thing I always do. I let off the gas and coast down until they decide to pass me, then I mash the throttle, get back in front of them and stand on my brakes.

Usually they just park in the road after that and sulk until I've driven away.

youtube.com/watch?v=lWKwk1R01d4&t=79s

Love how he doesn't even seem concerned about the motorcycle fag and checks his car lol

>>get let off with a warning for having "obstructive" black ice tree dangling from my rear view mirror

Dammit, user.
You're supposed to buy them in the shop and not actually put a whole bark into your car.

Came to type this, good job senpai

Step on the fucking gas, if they can keep up with me :^)

>let off throttle and engine brake down to 5 under

>The tragically hip

user...

>slow down
>open window
>call him massive faggot and throw my beer

...

>the tragically hip

welcome another ultimate driving machine.

let him pass and tailgate him with hi beams
maybe give it a gentle bumper kiss

>porsche drivers have nothing to compensate for so they drive in a civil way
>Cayenne owners
>being civil
I'm a 993 owner, but i have seen a Carrera s being an ass.

Seems like an exception. The average Porsche driver is very polite in my experience.

bikefags are literal niggers of the roads

>4.7L twin turbo

Bread on engine

>manual mercedes

T R A S H
R
A
S
H

most porsche drivers are 60 year old soulless jews who drive the speed limit and status symbol

Porsche owners have nothing to prove. They don't have to prove to you they're rich, they just are. They don't have to prove to you they're fast, they just are. BMW (and Audi) owners are often lower-middle class leasers who can barely afford the loan, and are threatened by more "plebian" American muscle in performance. They need to make sure you know that they're better than you.

>and are threatened by more "plebian" American muscle in performance.
you see the same in yurop though
ask any German or Italian. In Italy even VW drivers drive aggressively, an Italian guy told me it's because they eat up the marketing that makes them believe they're driving some sort of godmachine.

>being an autotragic apologist
how does it feel to not know how to drive?

I suppose a Golf R with 292hp is fast enough to be "godlike" in Europe.

>"user why did you think it was a good idea to brake check a police officer?"
Should have asked why did you think it was good idea to be that close to my car?

>Should have asked why did you think it was good idea to be that close to my car?
enjoy getting shot

Every fucking tailgater here in Florida is some NJ fag with the headbeams turned to max. Happened to me twice and whenever I would pull off he would still tail.

>enjoy getting shot
Yeah, I would get shot.

I fucking hate fags with LED lights. Should be illegal on well lit city streets desu

*hits switch that kills the brake light circuit

>being tailgated at night
>check rearview
>see this

it's not even in english

he's listening to some turkish r&b or some shit

>checks car for damage before checking to see if the dude is even still alive
kek

If you aren't brown, then he was probably expecting you to go speeding or not fully stopping at red lights and stop signs and just hanging back to catch you for some bullshit.

Also, stop brake-checking people. Only assholes driving shitboxes do this.

Deduce that it's just some asshole with a search light and carry on.

My years of driving and getting pulled over has conditioned me to spot Crown Vic headlights at night from a fair distance. I get overly cautious and breath a sigh of relief when it's not a cop or when it's some other Panther car.

Now that all the Crown Vic Interceptors are getting phased out, I have to get used a few new different looking cop cars.

damn, this is actually amazing. Too bad the faggot tailgater would come up and shoot you or something

you got a purdy mouth user

Step on the gas and leave him behind.

>Cayenne owners
Second this, Cayenne and Macan owners are almost Prius-tier shit drivers. Never really see jackassery from people in other Porsches though.

Last week I drove past some dumbass in a Cayenne who'd attempted to pass a semi with a lowboy on the inside line of a left turn... and got smacked by the lowboy as the truck completed the turn.

>defying an officer
Are you a nigger? That's how you don't get away with a warning

>Now that all the Crown Vic Interceptors are getting phased out, I have to get used a few new different looking cop cars.
the worst thing is that there's a myriad of cop cars now, from all the big 3

There's a killer on the road
His brain is squirmin' like a toad
Take a long holiday
Let your children play
If you give this man a ride
Sweet family will die
Killer on the road, yeah

Even a 230hp GTI is considered "fast" in yurop, and 2 liter engines are considered "big"and "powerful".

If you can't see their tires on the ground behind you it's tailgating.

Early hours, open road, family of five - on their way home
Having enjoyed a day in the sun, their encounter with gore has just begun
A homicidal fool not knowing left from right, now has the family in his sight
Trying to perceive if he's blind or insane, he steers his car into the other lane

Both of them collide, expressions horrified
Head on at full speed, the vultures will soon feed

The father of three was impaled on the wheel,
as his skull became a part of the dash
His eyeballs ejected his sight uneffected, he saw his own organs collapse
His seatbelt was useless for holding him back, it simply cut him in two
Legs were crushed, out leaked pus as his spinal cord took off and flew
The mother took flight through the glass, and ended up impaled on a sign
Her intestines stretched from the car down the road for a quarter of a mile

Fourth child on the way, won't live another day
Fetus on the road, with mangled little bones
Little children fly, not a chance to wonder why
Smashed against the ceiling, all their skin burning and peeling
Shards of glass explode, chest and skull now implode
Corpses they've become, and graves will have to be dug

Underneath the wheels, burning rubber on your face
Bleeding from your eyes, the slaughtered victims lies
Knowing what he's done, he just backs up one more time
Laughing at the mess, a pile of meat on the street

One child left slowly dying now, arteries gushing blood
Now it's time to feed on flesh, the gore has just begun

Early hours, open road, family of five - on their way home
Having enjoyed a day in the sun, their encounter with gore has just begun
A homicidal fool not knowing left from right, now has the family in his sight
Trying to perceive if he's blind or insane, he steers his car into the other lane

The look of death in my eye
Surely no-one will survive
Just a pile of mush
Left to dry in the sun

I see my fresh kill
Left in the road
Remains of your bodies
Mangled and torn

Cannibal Corpse - "Shredded Humans"

Pretty moral lyrics for Cannibal Corpse tbqh
will give it a listen, I don't think I've heard it

Its russian