/ss13g/ - spessmen on a spess station

Bagel Edition
LAST TIME ON /ss13g/!
>Shitposting
>Bagelstation
>See here cloud.githubusercontent.com/assets/3959840/26075992/18602470-396c-11e7-8212-45cc13710cc4.png


>What is Space Station 13?
youtube.com/watch?v=FHH1vfY6HTA
pastebin.com/VNcX2Quc

>New player guide
ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/The_Basics
ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/General_Help

>BYOND client
byond.com/download/build/LATEST/

>Pomf Serbian, main Veeky Forumsstation server
byond://game.ss13.moe:7777

>Test server
byond://ss13.moe:1337

>Public server list
byond.com/games/exadv1/spacestation13

>How do I connect to the servers?
Hit the cogwheel in the upper right corner of the BYOND hub and pick "Open Location"

>Veeky Forumsstation forum and logs
ss13.moe/forum/
game.ss13.moe/logs

>Map renders collection: updated sometimes
game.ss13.moe/minimaps/images/maps/

>Coderbus, here!
github.com/d3athrow/vgstation13
@rizon #coderbus @rizon #vgstation
discord.gg/fE3Ts8A

>Cryo Autism
pastebin.com/raw/YmAyagUa

>Round Stats
stats.ss13.moe/

>SS13 booru for all your SS13 images!
ss13.booru.org/

>How To Install BYOND: The Video Tutorial: The Movie
youtube.com/watch?v=-iWiZwv9f1o

>Nostalgia
boards.fireden.net/vg/search/text/ss13g/
ss13.moe/index.php/bans

>OP Pastebin
pastebin.com/raw/z7czw5WQ

1st for my detective changes

>tfw my thread was three seconds older

3rd for using this thread

git gud shitters need to GIT GONE

Someone make a fart edit, please.

/d/ get out

>only two tanks of plasma in engineering

8th for cute astrospace cosmos wives

I was reading traitor guides and came across Atmos Tech

"Other than the obvious plasmaloose you can also create horrible creations if you know atmospherics well. Its entirely possible to cook gas to temperatures beyond that of our own sun. You can also adjust all the air alarms at the Atmospheric Alarm Control Computer. If you have time and patience you can set all the alarms to not freak out if there's supercooled plasma in the air and act as if there's nothing wrong, allowing the gas to spread faster.
You can also hook up one of the gas miners to the station proper, you should prepare for incredible amounts of lag should you be insane enough to try this."

I know nothing about the job but what would

>You can also hook up one of the gas miners to the station proper, you should prepare for incredible amounts of lag should you be insane enough to try this."

Even do? Lag people to death?

THIS IS A BLUE BOARD CHILDREN ARE HERE

>CLICKED THE WRONG THUMBNAIL

Fuggggggggg

butt

butt

>keeps his reaction pictures and porn in the same folder
barbarian

butt

>somebody calls you a fucking faggot that should be lined up and shot

What is your waifu's thought process when playing Lifeweb?

>never properly seen lifeweb sprites
>only seen the fanart things
>no idea where the game is
>no idea how to get access to it
>for all I know and how little there is on the game just lying around Lifeweb could just be an elaborate fucking ruse.

I gotta figure out how to get access to that bullshit, medieval ss13 sounds like a nice change of pace.

>Tzchernobog
I once saw a zombie fucking dunk the Tzchernobog
always a fun experience

But seriously what does "Hook up one of the gas miners to the station proper mean" I have 0 expierence with atmos tech

It might mean set up a gas miner on the station itself instead of in the little chambers where they are kept.

I saw Shiggypiggy at the fortress Lifeweb yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for ERP or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and dumping his fiancée in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my playing, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen whores in his hands without paying.

The guard at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear him, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When he took one of the girls and started ERPing with her multiple times, I stopped him and told him to ERP with them each individually “to prevent any sexiological infetterence,” and then he turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After he ERPed with each girl and overdosed on drugs, the guard started to say the price and he kept interrupting him by crying really loudly.

This is a salamandoo shitpost
I got a feeling about it

mfw my master discards me.
How can I follow the Bushido Code directive when you've done something like this, master?

>I-I'm just IRONICALLY shit at my job, t-to stick it to those metagamers!

ROGUE PIXEL REEEEEEEEE

medbay was absolutely horrid that round
switch jobs for the love of god

chemists did fuck all

What are some games similar to this?

Space Station 14

Space station 15

That pasta is older than Salamandoo

Space Station 16

Space Station 17

is space tester an official job

>My second round as vampire
>I spawn as geneticist
>fuck yes!
>I'll turn these monkeys into humans and get easy blood
>Doesn't work
>Wait for people to be hurt and alone, doesn't work.
>Eventually just decide to go wander in maintenance and find a random person
>I'm sorry Mr. Engineer.
I thought I was starving to death because blood, also I thought it was too risky to let you live.
>Eject Mr. Engineer's body into space
>I got everything except my fucking breathing mask
>Rush back to medbay and shapeshift now Esther Sheets as Nick Weller
>Get lung surgery
>leave and shuttle is called
>Break into hop's office
>hide in the closet
>HEY HOP I NEED YOU AT YOUR DESK
>Open the door, get on the floor, you're getting fucking detained and drained.
>Hypnotize him and strip him
>He starts begging for his life
>Decide to let him live if he'll open his locker for his spare jump suit and stay quiet.
>get suit, drag him out to safety and he passes out on a stretcher for rest of round I think.
>Sit quietly on shuttle chair while the other vampire tries to murder everyone and hope my target killed himself
>He did.
>Mfw

go in the other threads and ctrl+f lifeweb for the IP

>trying to succ monkeymen
>in [current year] + 2

My first time back on in 1-3 years, I never played vampire before.

So, the shuttle got called for an arbitrary reason, and not a single head decides to recall? and the admins don't recall it? What the fuck, the round was thirty minutes old. why do people do these things.

>the tubes that go around the research outposts and to the AI core on meta
do they actually do anything, i've never seen them used

We TG now

>the cute mime was actually a yandere

So basically there is no similar game is what you are trying to tell me? Not even in the form of a tabletop RPG?

transport tubes

how do you use them

>eat monkey cube
>drink water
>don't pop into gibs

wtf

ss27 is pretty good

If there was do you think we'd still be playing this 2003 atmos sim on a client that would've been out if date in the 90s?

Don't ever moderate me or my Son ever again.

is it true bros? Does goon have the better community? How can we ever compete with that?

>goon have the better community
>the monkeys who would screech and throw their feces everywhere turning the station into some sort of abstract painting

Holy shit, they do have the better community.

>goons
>better
>ever
no

They think they have a better community because they've policed away anyone who would do a swear

Who is your Medbayfu?

hachi

>the guys who can only live with their server so long as its one big metaclub
>the pop fron the server that would die and rot completely if its code was fully spoiled and open source
>the community that has been shifted so much into sheltered faggots that even in their purge days you cant say nigger
>the community that cant live without flips, screams, farts and othwr meaningless shit
>the community of rejected ivory tower faggots that think they still matter past 07
>better than anyone else
:^)

a pod comes past to one of the stations
You walk into it
it takes a while and takes you somewhere else

>goons
>use a website that is actively dying
>Has been eclipsed by a website they once considered a rival due to being a polar opposite, SA being a pay-to-use userbase against 4chans free anonymous one
>Has never provided any originality, has always had to steal from Veeky Forums in order to sustain its own entertainment
>At every opportunity, has been cucked by this website
>"w-we have a better userbase!"
Today I will remind them

>Liking that hussy when there are obviously better doctorfus

I feel like it's the other way around, goon has so much content that it's absurd
or at least had

The grass is always greener.

Goon just seems like it has "a lot of content" because they have DIFFERENT content from most other ss13 servers. But most of the shit they have doesn't even mesh with the game, the whole virtual reality arcade is a good example of this.

Goon seems like it has more content because most of it's made for fun factor, while Veeky Forums and Veeky Forums have job related cool shit that's achieved trough either tedium or long job processes.

>removed POO
>removed shit like WELDERMAN and zombies
>removed removed removed removed
Goon was king of content, but then it started cutting shit out for no fucking reason
>b-but muh off chance outer space arcade machine that lets you play pong or some shit
wow yeah great stuff right there friendo

>most of its made for the fun factor

>the literal secret club chemistry
>the boring ass mining magnet
>doesn't even have any form of R&D

It's shit

>mining magnet
I played aa couple rounds there, holy shit, people who shittalk our roid need to visit goons mining and spend 10 rounds there, youl come rushing back to our comfy dord fort music roid in no time.

>tfw still have the full stolen gooncode
>it has all the secret chem recipes

>R&D
>Fun
R&D is as fun as being in an infinite time loop of having to sort 30 items every day
also who the fuck used mining magnet instead of going on wild adventures for minan/exploran

They changed it after the leak.

they dropped all the secret recipes (outside of a few where they just juggled the materials around)

every last one?

Every time the coders discover someone leaks the chem recipes, they change them.

Even if someone just figured them all out on his own and put them into a spreadsheet online, they change them.

"Members of Unit 731 pose in front of their latest batch of subjects for human experimentation." (1942, Colorized.)

post optimal chem fridges

I legit miss goon, it's where all my comfy spess memories generated from

why is medbay so full of newcomers?

>they don't have a rigidly enforced concept of Space Law
>better community

Without Space Law, they automatically have Shitcurity every round. They may not swear, but the interactions between people are eternally fucked.

we have had a huge influx of newfags for some reason. Probably some autist advertising on reddit

Everything is full of newcomers.

Like, half the station right now has been playing on Veeky Forums for less than a week.

I really wish we could get goon's wall and structure sprites.

This.

We're at 80 fucking people. It's both amazing and horrifying (20 Assistants, 17 Active oh god why)

Or it could have something to do with the daily threads that have been popping up on /v/

>All of these young, fresh faces, ready to be manipulated into subservience .

Hey kids, wanna /ss/?

>trying to start up a serb with the gooncode so I can play with shit
>every single compile is getting more errors than the last
>can't find the goonstation.dmb file it says it needs
I dindu nuffin, how do I fix

>getting current gooncode
>hosting current gooncode
Thats a dmca and a lawsuit for you.

ancient code
from when it was looted a good year or two ago

still though, can someone please assist in getting this working

So why did no one fix the oxygen in medbay when trying to make it cult HQ too?

Which waifu would make the best mother?

>game still lags whenever shit gets good
this is why i quit the first time for 2 years. i think i'm going to stay the fuck away until the game can function at full pace when there's blood on the floor and atmos is fucking around

>Cult

>one bomb can take out medbay, telcoms, and the bar on bagelstation
>toxins isn't even on the main station where it can be easily monitored

>identify cultists summoning
>get laser and all access
>ready to be a hero
>officer tases and removes my guns
>"no implant no guns"
>promptly dies to cult
>cant save him because no weapons
at least i lived

See you in 50 years then

>cult round
>I'm cult
>later in the round oxygen is fucked
>break into paramedic's office for more oxygen once I run out, making an unprotected opening in and out of medical in the process
>don't make it in time and pass out just before I click the internals back on
>over the course of 10 minutes about half the station walks right over me as I suffocate to death
>after I die a juggernaut drags me to a rune near cryo
>4 living cultists are trying to get 5 dead ones (including myself) to summon Narsie
>in the midst of their confusion as to why a bunch of corpses can't chant a non-cult engineer just waltzes in and starts dumping bodies around the rune into disposals

>welderbomb happens
>shuttle comes and goes
>cult fail
>presumably those 4 cultists are still confused to this day

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthugha Fomalhaut n'gha-ghaa naf'lthagn!

>my autisming made me miss a cult round

>have to DC for irl crap
>come back an hour later
>red health
>you have been converted to the cult here is how to speak cultspeak: objective summon nar nar
>total unending chaos
>station looks like a total warzone
>nazis walking around
>cult and noncult dying left and right
>try to muster strenght to summon
>gave another cultist my breathmask
>minutes later n20 flood
>instant down and lased to death by SS
>area around the nar nar rune is total chaos with a welderbomb being blown
>round ends with cult losing
what the fuck happend that round

It's weird, I have NEVER in all my years in this game seen someone use the plasmaminer as a way to fuck the station.

I even tried it on the test server recently, that shit is amazing, it never stops flooding and if the pressure in a room builds enough, opening a door for just a second is enough to fuck the whole station.

Also, is there a way to order more of them?

Hope everyone appreciated my service to the station as the maid!

Janitor, trash bags exist for a fucking reason. We will never get clean station bonus with guys like you in the Janislot.